Virtually Speaking

[Carmen Rivera]

THEKINDOFGIRLTHATGIRLSDON'TLIKE☆

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i love all my nights to end a little bit nasty - can't change the way i am[/center]

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[/b] compared to me! But that’s another story, for another day, I suppose. This week, I have bigger fish to fry.

Apparently I’m being expected to team with Niobe Martin, AKA “The Nightmare” that I beat last week in Tag Team competition before Steve decided to lay his hands on me. Niobe is someone I wouldn’t trust as far as I could throw her. Considering she’s a walking stick figure in a pair of trampy tights? I could toss her like a paper airplane, I’m sure. The fact is, she’s a female. At least, she should be, if her eating disorder hasn’t stopped her from losing her period which would just turn her into a freak of nature. But as far as it goes, I’m assuming that she’s a female, and females are vindictive.

What’s to stop her from trying to screw me over?

If I were Niobe, I would be incredibly vindictive and jealous when I saw someone even half as beautiful and talented as me in the premises. I am everything that women aspire to be in this business. Gorgeous, immensely talented, I know my way around the ropes. In just a matter of a few very short weeks, I have become the standard to which others are measured in this business. I have become the top of the line, and in a very short time, I’ll be the North American champion. And it seems until that day comes, I’m wasting life away, wrestling the scrubs who don’t deserve to be in the same building as I do, let alone the same ring as I do.

I just happen to have a knack for taking the bull by the horns, I suppose.

I don’t anticipate my battle with Young Kiz (wtf kind of name is that, bro? Seriously?) to be anything major though. To be honest, I think the most epic battle that he’ll ever encounter in his life is in ongoing battle with the English language. He’s yet to learn that words like “alright” are not pronounced “aiight.” He’s yet to learn that words that end in the letters –er, do not end with the letter “a” instead. Honestly, I’m not sure if he’s just trying too hard to be a thug, or if he’s just a little mentally challenged. One could have possibly led to the other. Let’s not go on about the fact that he’s a ring-wing nut job extremist.

Okay let’s.

It’s kind of funny someone who is so poorly educated and poorly spoken is so worried about the government. People like him are so concerned with trying to fund their dozen and a half children with social programs and any sort of money that they don’t actually have to earn themselves that I guess it’s only fair that he worries. Between scheming to find ways to get away from Child Support and saving up food stamps for the twenty-four case of Hot Pockets to “eat like a King”, I’m surprised Young Jizz Kiz can find the time to make it to Meltdown.

Not like it’ll matter. It’ll be as futile as his idol Ron Paul’s bid for Presidency: over before it even started.

You see, that’s the real difference between people like me and people like Jizz. I don’t do the trendy thing. I don’t stand on the counter culture for the sake of doing it. I stand steadfast and firm in my own beliefs because I have a mind of my own. Not like he knows that. He’s likely so focused and concerned with my right as a woman to have gender-selective abortions that he’ll likely be busy writing death threats to Planned Parenthood clinics to actually do something. May I just suggest taking a Sylvan class or two before he starts writing these letters?

I have never been surrounded by more pathetic people at the same time in my day. I have no place in this match, and I will be the FIRST to admit it. This match is for the scrubs. The jobbers. The welcome association. This is NOT my place, my place is at the top of the card, and certainly not at the top of the card of this pathetic has been Happy Hour that is Meltdown. I belong on the MAIN SHOW. The only reason Meltdown is even remotely watchable is because I’m on it, and putting the weight of all of these pathetic nobody losers on my shoulders is simply too much to ask for. I cannot, and will not, haul these useless people on my back any longer.

The Greatest on the face of the Planet,
Carmen Rivera
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tagged: kiz word count: 1152 lyrics: "sexy naughty bitch" tata young
pictures: by me template: by me notes: honestly? i've hit a horrible
case of writer's block these days. had absolutely no ideas for this and i feel like i
pushed a horrible piece of writing out. oh well. ): sorry to have disappointed!

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