Post by Your JESUS on Jun 13, 2012 18:38:06 GMT -4
Here I sit in a room dimly lit with a pair of headphones covering my ears as the melodic chaos of the Deftones punishes my ear drums. It's almost as if these guys have written the soundtrack to most of my life. Nothing like seeing them live either, you talk about charisma, feeding off the energy of the crowd. The Deftones could be the poster children of showmen. My head sways back and forth to guitar screeching. Chino belts out a bit then with the crash of a symbol the music stops at my favorite spot. Chino begins to whisper loudly
"Because you don't know me,shut up you don't know me....Squeal like a pig when you big fuckin'....big fuckin'...Aaaaapppe!"
The music explodes back to life and I have been energized.
Many fighters, boxers, athletes listen to music to motivate them before engaging in what they do. I'm a little opposite, I need no motivation, I only need focus and clarity. My mind is wild, like a thousand chimpanzees of greatness let loose on an elementary school. They tear the fuck out of the place and throw their magical shit all over the walls. I have to calm these beasts, sift through the shit and figure out which gift to use. In some strange way the poetic rumblings of Chino mixed with the sound that the Deftones offer up, seems to do the trick. Almost like being softly kissed on the cheek while getting kicked in the nuts. Now, I might of lost some of you there but I don't expect you to understand the inner workings of a modern day Einstein. Greatness is uncommon therefore it isn't for the common man, I folks am hardly your common man. With the music having done it's job bringing clarity to my mind, I stand up in this room and bounce on my toes.
Two years has passed since I laced up the boots, and did what I do. The reality of the situation lies before me and I must admit I left fear and doubt at home. There isn't an ounce of me that doesn't believe I am supposed to be back, you won't find a sliver of my existence that doesn't think that my body is up to par. Simply put if I didn't think I was capable to bring the thunderous fury and wrath of heaven upon the people of APW I wouldn't of put my name on the line. So, full of confidence and my ego pumped up like a beach ball on a hot summer afternoon I pull off the earphones and wrap them around my phone. Spinning on my heels I turn toward the door opening it to move forward. My eyes intense and within the week my opponent will soon see the fire that fuels me like a missile. He will not see any reservation, any hesitation, just have to swallow down my relentless assault like his mother's poorly cooked meals. I didn't make my way back to teeter around the mid card and help some of the lower level people gain notoriety by facing a true to life living legend like myself. No sir I fought my way to health because here is where I belong, dominating others is what I do, and pissing on the dreams of the unworthy has become a hobby for me. So with that on the fore front of my brain I exit my locker room and make my way down the hall. I'm set to do a sit down piece. By myself might I add. For some strange reason Hannah Storm doesn't want to be within fifty feet of me, wonder why?
No matter I am used to flying solo. Many partnerships or acquaintances that I have made in the past either back fired on me or hinted at such which forced my hand. By forcing my hand it mostly means I creatively back stabbed said individual for my own personal gain. So I'm not a team player, that's why I don't play football, and I make no apologies. That folks, is why I chose the profession I did. Wrestling, where my skills, athleticism, and heart can earn me victory. Where I alone am to blame for my misfortune, or triumph. A perfect place for ego driven fat heads of the world like myself. Others can pretend it's the chess match that fuels them, or some hokey poke bullshit line they wish to feed you. Once again Uncle Lively calls bullshit!!! Ego is the thing that motivates us all. Some lose sight of it, while others get consumed by it. Look at our Canadian APW president. A wrestler out to prove his dominance, prove he had what it took. That ego driven goal didn't stop there it forced him to open his own company, pour out every dime he has into fulfilling what some of you call a dream, what I call ego. He loves running the most successful fed in all the land, it makes him feel like a bad man when he parades around in his Hurricane Jeff pajama's at night.
I get it, he gets it, it's just time the rest of you wake up and get it. I inked my name on that contract so that a very expensive camera will point my direction and capture the fantastic moves I preform every night. I signed that dotted line to impose my dominance on others like a fucking bully because at the end of the day, it does make me feel good about myself. Unlike your story books or your after school specials my reality has the bully reigning with terror. If you stand up to him all your fears come to life. You begin to hate those folks who lied you, gave you that false hope that the bully will back down when you rise up. Uhhh...bullshit!!! You see all you are going to do is anger the raging beast of Ego-landia, and force me to unleash my dictator type tendencies upon your carcass. I will leave you laying in a public forum with a plunger up your ass and scorched nipples to serve as a sign to all those with nonsensical fantasies like yours that life is cruel, and I am the one standing on the throne jerking off on the fruit before my servants force feed it to you.
Ok again a few of you are wandering around like you aren't sure where your group went, I mean really. You remind me of the special needs kid on a field trip, put a fucking leash on the Tard or else he will never keep up. Back on topic, what was my topic? We were discussing my massive need to feel like I'm better then every one else, but there was something else...oh yes my current video piece and working alone. That's kind of a lie, in wrestling many times we are followed by a camera and have to pretend they aren't there. Let me give you an example, I have a secret beef with wrestler A, let's just call him Tornado Tom. I want to sneak attack Tornado Tom before our match to gain a little bit of an advantage. So I see him standing in the hall around the seamstresses as they put the finishing touches on his douchey cape. I think to myself what a perfect opportunity I have here, but wait there is a camera. There will not only be witnesses to my battery and assault, but indisputable video proof as well. None the less I carry out my dastardly act as if the camera was invisible. I mean that is hard to do, you people have seen those guys bouncing all over the outside of the ring with that bulky equipment, hard to miss. The point that I have so painfully tried to make here, is that us wrestlers are truly never alone, there is always the camera man.
Tonight it's me, a leather couch and one of these fine gentlemen set to capture what will surely be the ruin of my opponent. My first match back in the fold and I will be damned if it doesn't end with me standing tall. It begins here by ripping his paper mâché exterior to shreds verbally, leaving his soft innards exposed to the in ring beating I plan to unleash upon his far less then qualified ass later on in the week. So enough insight to my mind, let me end the guided tour of my inner thoughts and get down to business. Hopefully the purist's of story telling have gotten enough veggies because here comes the steak. Let the camera spark to life what the people pay to see,"Your JESUS" uncensored. With that I take my seat, my head hung, why I'm not sure, for dramatic cinematic affect I guess. Anyways I let my right leg bounce up and down as the camera turns on.
"Because you don't know me,shut up you don't know me....Squeal like a pig when you big fuckin'....big fuckin'...Aaaaapppe!"
The music explodes back to life and I have been energized.
Many fighters, boxers, athletes listen to music to motivate them before engaging in what they do. I'm a little opposite, I need no motivation, I only need focus and clarity. My mind is wild, like a thousand chimpanzees of greatness let loose on an elementary school. They tear the fuck out of the place and throw their magical shit all over the walls. I have to calm these beasts, sift through the shit and figure out which gift to use. In some strange way the poetic rumblings of Chino mixed with the sound that the Deftones offer up, seems to do the trick. Almost like being softly kissed on the cheek while getting kicked in the nuts. Now, I might of lost some of you there but I don't expect you to understand the inner workings of a modern day Einstein. Greatness is uncommon therefore it isn't for the common man, I folks am hardly your common man. With the music having done it's job bringing clarity to my mind, I stand up in this room and bounce on my toes.
Two years has passed since I laced up the boots, and did what I do. The reality of the situation lies before me and I must admit I left fear and doubt at home. There isn't an ounce of me that doesn't believe I am supposed to be back, you won't find a sliver of my existence that doesn't think that my body is up to par. Simply put if I didn't think I was capable to bring the thunderous fury and wrath of heaven upon the people of APW I wouldn't of put my name on the line. So, full of confidence and my ego pumped up like a beach ball on a hot summer afternoon I pull off the earphones and wrap them around my phone. Spinning on my heels I turn toward the door opening it to move forward. My eyes intense and within the week my opponent will soon see the fire that fuels me like a missile. He will not see any reservation, any hesitation, just have to swallow down my relentless assault like his mother's poorly cooked meals. I didn't make my way back to teeter around the mid card and help some of the lower level people gain notoriety by facing a true to life living legend like myself. No sir I fought my way to health because here is where I belong, dominating others is what I do, and pissing on the dreams of the unworthy has become a hobby for me. So with that on the fore front of my brain I exit my locker room and make my way down the hall. I'm set to do a sit down piece. By myself might I add. For some strange reason Hannah Storm doesn't want to be within fifty feet of me, wonder why?
No matter I am used to flying solo. Many partnerships or acquaintances that I have made in the past either back fired on me or hinted at such which forced my hand. By forcing my hand it mostly means I creatively back stabbed said individual for my own personal gain. So I'm not a team player, that's why I don't play football, and I make no apologies. That folks, is why I chose the profession I did. Wrestling, where my skills, athleticism, and heart can earn me victory. Where I alone am to blame for my misfortune, or triumph. A perfect place for ego driven fat heads of the world like myself. Others can pretend it's the chess match that fuels them, or some hokey poke bullshit line they wish to feed you. Once again Uncle Lively calls bullshit!!! Ego is the thing that motivates us all. Some lose sight of it, while others get consumed by it. Look at our Canadian APW president. A wrestler out to prove his dominance, prove he had what it took. That ego driven goal didn't stop there it forced him to open his own company, pour out every dime he has into fulfilling what some of you call a dream, what I call ego. He loves running the most successful fed in all the land, it makes him feel like a bad man when he parades around in his Hurricane Jeff pajama's at night.
I get it, he gets it, it's just time the rest of you wake up and get it. I inked my name on that contract so that a very expensive camera will point my direction and capture the fantastic moves I preform every night. I signed that dotted line to impose my dominance on others like a fucking bully because at the end of the day, it does make me feel good about myself. Unlike your story books or your after school specials my reality has the bully reigning with terror. If you stand up to him all your fears come to life. You begin to hate those folks who lied you, gave you that false hope that the bully will back down when you rise up. Uhhh...bullshit!!! You see all you are going to do is anger the raging beast of Ego-landia, and force me to unleash my dictator type tendencies upon your carcass. I will leave you laying in a public forum with a plunger up your ass and scorched nipples to serve as a sign to all those with nonsensical fantasies like yours that life is cruel, and I am the one standing on the throne jerking off on the fruit before my servants force feed it to you.
Ok again a few of you are wandering around like you aren't sure where your group went, I mean really. You remind me of the special needs kid on a field trip, put a fucking leash on the Tard or else he will never keep up. Back on topic, what was my topic? We were discussing my massive need to feel like I'm better then every one else, but there was something else...oh yes my current video piece and working alone. That's kind of a lie, in wrestling many times we are followed by a camera and have to pretend they aren't there. Let me give you an example, I have a secret beef with wrestler A, let's just call him Tornado Tom. I want to sneak attack Tornado Tom before our match to gain a little bit of an advantage. So I see him standing in the hall around the seamstresses as they put the finishing touches on his douchey cape. I think to myself what a perfect opportunity I have here, but wait there is a camera. There will not only be witnesses to my battery and assault, but indisputable video proof as well. None the less I carry out my dastardly act as if the camera was invisible. I mean that is hard to do, you people have seen those guys bouncing all over the outside of the ring with that bulky equipment, hard to miss. The point that I have so painfully tried to make here, is that us wrestlers are truly never alone, there is always the camera man.
Tonight it's me, a leather couch and one of these fine gentlemen set to capture what will surely be the ruin of my opponent. My first match back in the fold and I will be damned if it doesn't end with me standing tall. It begins here by ripping his paper mâché exterior to shreds verbally, leaving his soft innards exposed to the in ring beating I plan to unleash upon his far less then qualified ass later on in the week. So enough insight to my mind, let me end the guided tour of my inner thoughts and get down to business. Hopefully the purist's of story telling have gotten enough veggies because here comes the steak. Let the camera spark to life what the people pay to see,"Your JESUS" uncensored. With that I take my seat, my head hung, why I'm not sure, for dramatic cinematic affect I guess. Anyways I let my right leg bounce up and down as the camera turns on.
"Nerves, some people may think this leg twitch is a direct result of that. Why wouldn't I be nervous. I had disastrous motorcycle crash that not only sidelined me for years but left me with plates, screws and various other medical gems that make flying an even more joyous occasion. Will these pieces of my puzzle hold up under the pressures of war? I have no doubts, and later on this week my opponent will learn first hand the truth I already know. So to answer the question, No sir this bounce of my leg is excitement, anticipation. Like a young child sitting in his bed on Christmas Eve waiting to fall asleep so he can wake up and enjoy the spoils a fat man left behind. My moment is upon us, my Christmas morning is here and I plan on unwrapping a five star certified ass whipping on your pathetic ass Gabriela. I knew the APW was liberal about females in the past but good God we have just let any of these retched skanks waltz through the door now don't we. Look at you, with your long scraggly hair all knotted up, looking like a five dollar truck stop whore fresh from her last session. Sweat heart, those truck stops have showers and if you need some money for hygiene products I'm feeling charitable. With that being said, let me address the big Elephant in the room if I may. The fact that you walk around like a full fledged bearded lady from the circus makes perfect sense as to why you feel like you can step into a man's world and tangle with the leaders of it who let their testicles swing between our legs like the clapper on a bell. So Bearded Babe maybe after I put you down and out in front of the live crowd, I'll have one of the make up sluts from the back come on down to the ring and give you a solid chin waxing."
With that the cameraman does the unprofessional faux pas of laughing out loud to my ridiculous statements. I know that I am in fact not facing a woman, just a guy who likes to grow his hair out like one, so with it I decided to have some fun, but time for that is far over by the look in my eyes after the cameraman straightens up his act. The brief glimpse into the windows of my soul then divert away from the lens once again as I push on.
"Alright Gabe let me break it down to you. You are rather wet behind the ears, new to the game if you will. I'm sure your mind fucks with you and your confidence may question if you really have what it takes. I'm sure like most people you have put in lots of work physically, but mentally are you ready? You could be one of those guys that frequents the mirror from time to time, almost giving yourself the pep talk to rally your spirit's. These types of pussies are all too common, and constantly need reassurance. When you step inside the ring with the one and only JESUS Gabe, you much needed confidence rally will be broken, depleted, and will come up short. You will be overwhelmed by my non stop barrage of talent, and soon realize your account of worth is overdrawn."
"It comes down to checks and balances, I am collecting a check to whip your ass and the world balances out when I put you in your place. I show all the APW faithful that your place on the evolutionary ladder of success here is right below my ball sack licking up all the duck butter. I'm talking fresh from a match grime coated on my gems as I stretch them out ward like butterfly wings on an angel giving you a prime surface to begin lapping away."
"Listen it's a just how the chips fell, I was born simply amazing, the second coming of Christ and you are just a simpleton placed here to make me look even more amazing then I already do. If my homework serves me right you are Dutch, and lived in England. In both cases you are accustomed to coming up short, and being second rate. So good for you, should be easier to swallow that way. If it's not, if the embarrassment of laying flat on your back with my balls on your forehead as the ref counts to three is too much of a fear for you, then this is option B. You can skip out on our little engagement and let me earn victory the easy way, by forfeit. I'm not to proud to collect the freebies of the world. I'm also not the guy that will just walk through the match either, so if you do decide to peek through that curtain, let your sappy intro music play and stroll on down to Lively boulevard I promise you Elm Street will be a much more pleasant street to have stepped upon. Placed inside the Nightmare with Freddy will be a far more pleasing experience. The pain you will feel shall be intense, deep, and stinging. The scars I will leave you with will have lasting memories from the hell I made you endure as punishment for facing off with me when God knows you should be in the back stacking chairs. I will ruin your day like a Mother finding out she just miscarried her unborn fetus. Better yet let us think of this as just another abortion. I'm the coat hanger all heated up ready to get in there and start poking around. You are the unwanted seedling that I am set to dispose of. Soon you will be a heap of bloody tissue flushed down the toilet just to be remembered as nothing more then a mistake. A little to harsh, maybe but harsh words are needed to prepare you for the sheer and humiliating reality that awaits you. That ever so familiar music will begin to play, the smell of my sweaty crotch will bring you back to life like smelling salts. As your little peepers open up to see my hand raised, that moment will be the curtain call if you. A small sign to let you know the punishment has ended."
"Everything from the bell to that inevitable moment will be water board torture, electrical agony, and complete annihilation. The crowd will look on in horror as I rape you of your new career like a helpless woman forced to loose her virginity. I will beat the piss out of you inside the ring and force my superiorness upon your helpless ass like a woman's crotch being force feed the mutton missile of her attacker. So to the medical staff in the back, prep the rape kit, get the camera ready there will be massive vaginal damage because my assaults are anything but gentle, and I hate lubrication."
"Gabe you have heard of horror stories, people have recanted nightmares, but nothing can prepare for the real thing. That stench of blood, how it turns your stomach. The crunch of bones snapping, and eerie sound of flesh being beaten are all things that will forever cloud your mind. Later on this week you will have a lasting image, and a memory forever burned into your frontal lobe. This day in history is when Michael Lively tried to warn you, but his words did not do justice, his warnings didn't carry enough weight. Gabe your come to JESUS meeting will leave you feeling like a war torn Somalian child missing their limbs laying in a bloodied pool of vomit, piss, and shit trembling at the image of their family being slaughtered before their eyes. No matter how much time passes, how much help you receive, your retinas will forever be burned with the image of the JESUS, Michael Lively pissing on your dreams, and shitting on your flimsy prayers."
With that I stand from the chair, glaring at the floor, hiding my eyes. No sir you don't get to look into these fire balls of fury until game day. With that I hope this chump brings his A game, because no matter any ones opinion, the real facts will be opposite the ring with him on Monday night, and these facts have ruined many a men fresh in their journey for success like this young buck. With that we fade out.
