Post by Michael Callahan on Jan 6, 2013 0:32:52 GMT -4
ISSUE ONE
A Michael Callahan Graphic Novel
Whizzing past the cracked white, red and blue paint of the battered old welcome sign washed relief over my weary body, a welcome release after five hours of driving on what seemed like a wild good chase. Many a time I had considered turning back, yet now there was truly no turning back. Not even the weathered state of the sign and it's foreshadowing how grim and despairing this town was wasn't going to make me change my mind. I'd driven here, I'd made it alive through bumpy country road and damn it if I wasn't going to at least spend a day here before driving north to Yakima Airport so I could fly out to Manchester.
It was early afternoon when I finally pulled up on the edge of the tiny town, opening my car door and making my first steps into Avery. Fresh country air filled my stuffed up nostrils, clearing my sinuses and whisking me back on a journey to my childhood. Back in the days of youth and romance when I would play on Rattlesnake Hills with Bethany and Buddy without a care in the world. Yet even that whiff of long-forgotten memories couldn't mask the stench of economic and cultural decay in the rustic buildings and the battered, broken fences. The only well maintained construct was the bus station on the edge of the main road, empty save for a lone traveller with a cowboy hat tilted low to cover his face from the beating sun.
Why was I here?
Michael Callahan: What is this place?
The cowboy hat tipped up, a pair of steely green eyes locking onto me. A small smile crossed the lips of the local as he peeled himself off the bench and sauntered towards me like he was lord of the land.
?: This pard'na is Avery County. Can't you read boy? There's a big sign that ya' just drove straight past.
His mockery was friendly, so I took no offence. He seemed not to be defensive or territorial, just light-hearted and jesting in spirit.
Michael Callahan: Dumb question, I know.
?: What brings ya' to Avery, stranger?
Michael Callahan: A recommendation from a friend. He told me I'd find opportunity here.
The local chuckled heartily at me as if I'd just told him a vaguely amusing irony.
?: Opportunity? Psht. Boy, you ain't gonna' find much o' nothin' here. We got about two thousand people livin' in Avery but there ain't no jobs, no industry. Everyone takes the bus outta' town and comes back later in the evenin'. All we got is a couple o' bars an' a general store.
Michael Callahan: So you're just a commuter town? No industry?
?: Well... we used to have farms and stuff but the families who ran 'em died or moved away. We got a mine too but according to Mayor Roffey, we can't use that for health and safety. Them Democrats never know what's good fer anybody.
Michael Callahan: This is the reddest town I've ever seen and you're run by a Democrat?! I'm tearing up here, man.
?: Well that's Avery for ya'. We're in a bad way, that's why nobody comes 'ere. Nothin' to see, nothin' to do. It ain't all bad though. No crime, no fights, there just ain't much to do. What's yer name stranger?
Michael Callahan: I'm Michael Callahan. Pleasure to meet you William.
I offered him a hand to shake but instead he pulled me into a half shake, half-embrace with a macho palm to the back.
William Redding: THE Michael Callahan?! Well I'll be. I thought I recognised yer voice. You're a local celebrity round here Mike. A Washington boy, proud and true makin' it big. We know all about yer antics. If you're plannin' on stayin' a while, you should come down Smokey Joe's and meet the regulars. You'd be treated like royalty.
Five minutes ago, I wanted to turn around and get back in my car, drive away and never look back. Now though? I felt like sticking around a little. There was more to this place than meets the eye.
Michael Callahan: Well... damn. Maybe I will. Still, I can't stay long. I've got to fly out later and I haven't got anywhere to stay.
William Redding: Oh don't be silly! If time ain't no concern, I don't think we got any fancy schmancy five star hotels but heck, I'ma willin' to bet a man'd give you his bed and his wife and daughter to have the honour of lettin' you stay in his home! A guy like you'd get a lotta' sway 'round here.
I shuddered at the thought of some buck-toothed farm boy handing over his ghoulish wife and beautiful valley girl daughter to me as if it was owed. It seemed almost medieval a concept to me, to pledge such fealty.
Michael Callahan: Creepy...
William Redding: That's Avery County for ya... Don't worry, I'm kiddin' with ya'. You'll have no trouble getting' a bed for the night. Come on man. Park yourself up in town and I'll give ya' the grand tour.
It didn't seem to matter to William that the bus he was waiting for had just arrived ready to take him to work. The fact that he was escorting me around his home-town had totally superseded his need to go to work and feed his family. Maybe he knew something I didn't. Maybe Steve knew something I didn't. All I know is that although I had my reservations about this town, I was curious to find out more. I was going to spend some time in this hick town if it killed me...
Early morning, a mild headache and a dire need for the bathroom. Once again, I'd woken up next to a pretty girl. This time though I was indoors and I wasn't covered in love bites. I'd just spent the night with Aubrey Parker ahead of Asylum because I wanted to spend some quality time with my newest friend and I was alone and bored. Nothing salacious had happened. Honest. My phone buzzed in my pocket reminding me that I had a radio interview later at Radio Manchester and I'd be damned if I was going to miss it, so I quickly excused myself from Aubrey's room after suiting up and made my way down to the streets.
Some people think that England has betrayed it's cultural values in the 21st century, thanks to Cocacolonisation and the spread of American trends through our combined titan-sized media and entertainment industries. Yet one thing that hadn't seeped through was the artificial politeness in day to day conversation. Never in America would I leave my home and be addressed by someone like the way I was as I left the Crowne Plaza, by a heavy-set balding man in his 40's wearing a Manchester United shirt.
Stranger in the Street: “OI CALLAHAN! You suit wearing wanker!”
Unless you lived in New York, you wouldn't be verbally accosted like that as you left your home. American custom promotes positive politeness and encouragement followed by rampant bitching and gossip when backs are turned. Here, they don't do that so much. They're far more open about their criticisms.
Michael Callahan: Thanks! You red scum! Why don't you go lose to Manchester City again?
If you said something like that in America, you'd have probably have broken glass shards jammed in your eye. Here though? There was a 80/20 chance that like this man, he just wanted to get a chuckle out of you. His smile when I heckled him back though was something unlike anything you'd get in America. It was refreshing, it was bold, and it was a habit I made a mental note of not to take back with me.
I hailed a taxi, then remembered that this was England and that too wasn't something that was done here so I used Safari on my iPhone to search for local taxi numbers. Once I'd found one suitable, no less than ten minutes later I was being whisked towards BBC Radio Manchester ready to be interviewed at 9AM by Andy Chase. With a headset and a mug of coffee, I was ready and raring to go but still feeling a little rough from last night's drink.
Andy Crane: Andddddd welcome back. That was “Cool For Cats” by Squeeze and this is the Breakfast Show. I'm Andy Crane and today we're in the very fine company of America's most polarised multiple professional. He's a politician, he's a professional wrestler and a small-time business owner. Ladies and gentlemen, I'm joined by Action Packed Wrestling's Michael Callahan! Hello sir! How are you?
Michael Callahan: Very good sir. Thank you for asking.
Andy Crane: Now, we'll get to the nitty-gritty of politics later. As I'm sure you know, Manchester is quite a Labour city much like a lot of Northern England, something I'm sure you'll have reinforced to you by our callers later what with your particular school of politics. However, we'll talk about that later. First of all, being a wrestler, a high-calibre athlete as well as a politician. Is it hard? I mean, these are two high-stress careers. How do you cope? Do you have much of a social life?
Michael Callahan: To be honest with you, the politics part of my life doesn't take up as much time as it used to. When I was actively campaigning and running for office of my hometown of Kelso, I didn't have time to breathe never mind have a wrestling match. Now though, a lot of my work with Washington Republicans is helping others advance up the echelon and performing the administrative duties for the big hitters in the party on a national level which takes significantly less of my time than running for mayor did. Yes, it's a high stress lifestyle but I find that the key to it all is balance and one of the things I do which I wouldn't advise for most careers is integrating your social life and your working one.
Andy Crane: Palling it up with the roster?
Michael Callahan: Absolutely. If I find spare time, I'm hanging out with wrestlers. I've got some very close friends on the Asylum roster that I treasure dearly and y'know? Push comes to shove, if we do have a dispute or a disagreement about something we've got a common ground on how we can resolve our differences. Anytime I get a little bit frustrated with a friend, we just duke it out in the ring. It's a really healthy way to de-stress and helps me to keep on top of things.
He and I share a chuckle at my story-telling, clearly interested in the way I wrestle my friends.
Andy Crane: Heheh, I'm sure there's a couple of people I work with that I'd quite like to get into the ring with.
Michael Callahan: Heheh. I'm sure there's a few people in office back in Washington State that I wouldn't mind boxing round the ears either but such is life. Whatever walk of life you take, whatever career path you choose, there's always gonna' be at least one person out there that grinds your gears and makes your life more difficult. The trick is to try and bypass them as best you can and be as smooth and cooperative as you can. Kill with kindness.
Andy Crane: This is coming from a man who settles his disputes with wrestling matches?
We shared another laugh again at my something of a hypocrisy. Crane takes a quick sip from his glass of water as I explain myself.
Michael Callahan: Heh, yeah. That's a fair point to make but there's a whole other side of it beyond what you see in the ring. There's more than just the wrestlers. There's referees, road agents, medical technicians and of course our bosses that we can't wrestle with physically. Those are the types of people you don't wanna wrestle with socially either because they will make your life miserable. Sometimes just playing ball and sucking it up is the best you can do. Don't take crap and be a push-over, but be reasonable and accommodating.
Andy Crane: Now, speaking of reasonable and accommodating. We've heard rumours about you. Although you're a devout Catholic and all, you've been linked in the papers romantically with a number of high profile beautiful women in the public eye. I'm talking Olivia Wilde... Aubrey Parker... Jaime King... What do you make of this, lover man?
Michael Callahan: Well, you know the media have a tendency to sensationalise so they can sell papers. Truthfully? I can't say outright whether or not I've been involved with these women because I'm a sucker for attention. That said, even for a man of God like myself I have a cross to bear of being in a profession where I frequently am in contact with beautiful, talented, intelligent young women, many of whom are highly sought the world-over and honestly? If I ended up involved with any of these girls... who'd blame me?
Crane chuckled in agreement, his mind adrift about the beautiful women he'd been connected with in the past.
Andy Crane: Not me. That's for sure. Now finally, before we go to “Sussudio” by Phil Collins. APW Asylum at the Manchester Arena tonight. Sell it to me.
Michael Callahan: Well y'see Andrew, like you said. A lot of people take occasion with me for what I do and what I stand for whether it's my style of wrestling, my politics, my religious beliefs or who I choose to associate with. Tonight, my opponent is Jair Amir Hopkins. A talented young kid who's had a tough childhood and a lot of growing up to do. Yet he's still not quite past the final hurdle yet. He struggles with gross jealousy and a pack mentality of adopting dislikes and grudges but being unable to drop them once the conflict is resolved. He can't accept that things change, people change. His best friend and I had a storied and bitter rivalry for 11 months which we've put behind us. Now though? He's clinging and bitter like a certain “Second City”.
Andy Crane: Easy there Mike.
Michael Callahan: I'm allowed to slate Liverpool. I lived there for a few months.
Now if you want the premier form of wrestling entertainment, straight outta' Canada then you go buy yourself Action Packed Wrestling tickets and go to the Manchester Arena to watch a stacked card along with yours truly silencing yet another critics. We've all had people doubt us, question us, slander our intentions and tell us what we can and can't do. I'm living proof that the only person who can tell you what to do is yourself alone.
Andy Crane: Thank you Michael. This is Manchester Radio, this is Phil Collins. We'll be taking calls with Michael Callahn after this...
