Post by Kid Dynamo on Dec 29, 2011 17:39:49 GMT -4
The theme of this promo is a tribute to the nuclear explosion that is the Internet Wrestling Community. This promo expects you to believe that A: Since APW is a six-times-a-month televised promotion, it is a place popular enough that it would be followed by the IWC; B: that said IWC would be so meticulous about following said elite promotion that it would be news when anyone is signed and is starting to compete within the house show circuit (this is proven true by the fact that you can easily find WAY TOO MUCH information on “that other promotion”’s developmental territories by doing a quick scan in Bleacher Report) and C: that youtubers and podcasters would be so desperate to get a live interview that they would take an APW newcomer with almost zero street cred (since most of it expired when he retired the first time in 2003) and hit him up for a segment. This last point is proven true by the fact that PWTorch.com, one of the highest-traffic IWC sites, recently did an interview with Big Vito. I’m not kidding.
Therefore, in honor of the IWC and how insanely huge it has gotten since the popularization of YouTube and Twitter, I present to you: a promo that could ABSOLUTELY take place.
The scene opens up in a hotel. On a scale of 1 to 10, 1 being a place that truckers and prostitutes would call “dirty” and 10 being the kind of place that Donald Trump would call “pricey”, it’s about a 3. In other words, if it were any worse, it would be a MOTEL.
Our hero is on the phone. I don’t really know what font color the Prez would prefer so I’ll just paraphrase here that he is touching base with his new boss to confirm that he has permission to discuss the almost-nil he knows about APW in this interview with a podcast that very few people listen to. The Prez, clearly with some management classes under his belt, does an expert job of pretending that he doesn’t have a MILLION things to do in preparing for the New Year’s Day Asylum and answers Dynamo’s questions about what can and can’t be said.
For the record, this is serious stuff. Were Dynamo to get kicked out of here, it would not be the first time, and that was before he had a Twitter account.
We skip ahead to the literally phoned-in interview. Obviously, you shouldn’t be able to hear the questions being asked, so let’s make a game out of it. After reading this interview, feel free to tweet your ideas for what the questions were to @kiddynamoapw.
...yeah thanks for having me on the show.
...Well, I’m FROM New Orleans originally, though I have made quite a few pit stops along the way. I’ve been in the business since May 1999 when I debuted as Incubus in MVW. A couple of gimmick changes and I finally debuted the Kid Dynamo moniker in July of that year and, well, excepting the three times I donned a mask and different name to hide who I was for the sake of my return or debut in a new place, that’s been who I’ve been.
...No, I’m not Shannon Moore. I know he used the name too, but that’s all it is is a name. Honestly, I pulled the name from a superhero in a comic book who was essentially the Human Torch but with electricity instead of fire. But, again, it’s just a name. I’ve had people ask me why I haven’t changed it, especially when I get guys overusing the “Kid” part to either call me a rookie or a pedophile, but, well, it’s just a name. Uncreative people are going to use the “Kid” prefix as a crutch anywhere I go. If I just changed it to “Dynamo” and took the kid off, it’d be like my time as Kid Dynamo stops existing. Like I said, I went through a lot of name changes and gimmicks to get to him, and, well, I’m proud to be “Kid Dynamo”.
...I picked APW because I am tired and tired of being in a place that is “on the cusp” of greatness. MVW was an indy that was going to profit huge off of the Hardcore Era of wrestling. OWF was an insanely-respect indy, but it was still an indy, and since some big time promotions had shut down around that time, no network wanted to take a risk like that. ASW was based in Canada and they just never got a following in the US. APW has TV shows, a rabid fan base, and, best of all, some of the best talents I have seen in this most recent generation of wrestlers. This place is the best right now, and it’s about time I made a name for myself somewhere where it will hold water on a national level.
...Quinn and Kash are just enemies of circumstance. Dan Quinn signed on the same day as me, so I already knew a little bit about him. So I just figured I’d pick a random opponent so that the fans could get an idea of who I am, and, well, why not pick the guy most statistically probable to be my debut opponent? As for Jason Kash, he and I have been going back and forth on Twitter a little bit. I’m trying to plant the seed for taking some of us guys that are looking to make a big splash and put us in a big showcase match and put a title shot on the line or something. You know, “Let’s see what these guys can do”, right? Kash doesn’t seem to think that that would be the right thing to do. After all, most tenured guys don’t like the idea that someone can be zero and zero and be better than them.
...I’m just saying the same thing I’m saying on Twitter, let’s determine who’s best by what happens in the ring instead of who’s been under contract the longest.
...I actually think I’d rather an Overdrive Title shot than trying to jump all the way up to the World Title. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I do NOT expect to be X and 0 the whole time I’m here. I expect to take my share of losses, but why not get in the mix as early as possible? I’d rather get the opportunity early to take on Johnny Rebel than wait for months until there’s no one left for me to face but champions. I’ll probably lose to Rebel the first time I face him, but you never know, and taking a tough loss against a respected opponent in APW is going to be better for me than eight wins in a row against the lower half of the spectrum. Besides, I’m good with sitting on that Overdrive Title for a while. I like the idea of being the champion of an entire show. I mean, there’s so much there. I could argue that, even though Nate Havok is the World Champion, he’s a member of the Overdrive roster and I’m the Overdrive champion, so I outrank him. Instant controversy. There’s of course the guy who’s been here months and months and never had a whiff of a championship belt and here I’d be earning it in relatively no time. Instant controversy. Plus, people wouldn’t have to pay to see me like they would the World Champ.
...Yeah, thanks for having me.
...Anytime.
Kid Dynamo hangs up the phone. He then looks straight at the camera. He doesn’t look surprised because, well, that would be stupid. He OBVIOUSLY let the cameraman in, explained to him that he wanted him to record his podcast interview, and then that he was going to get to some good ol’ trash talk. A look of surprise would be like pretending Dan Quinn was scary. Just pointless.
Man, I hope you guys and girls out there in the APW fanbase are as excited as I am. I am serious about making 2012 the year that a new era of greatness is ushered into this company, and what a week to start it off. Asylum on New YEar’s Day in my hometown of N’awlins, and then after that the first Overdrive of 2012. No doubt the new stars will get their chance to shine on that night, and it’s going to be great.
But, before we ever get there, it seems like I am already making enemies. First off, there’s Jason Kash. Apparently, Kash doesn’t like the idea of people like me without tenure here in APW earning a title shot. But, clearly Kash is a man of the past. After all, just a day or two ago, he was talking about how there was no way Havok would take his World Title away...and no, that wasn’t in the past tense; he said it like he thinks he’s still the champ and Christmas Chaos hasn’t happened yet, so maybe he’s off in some fantasy world where new guys have to scratch and claw their way up the mountain an inch at a time. That’s great and all, but I don’t need to prove myself. I just need an opportunity. I don’t even have to win. I told you before that I am in this because I am going to elevate APW to a new level. And I do that by fighting the best, not just the rest. I can open shows with Dan Quinn, Rick Sader, and future newcomers to APW but what does that accomplish? No, Kash, it’s when I get in the ring with guys like you and make you have to work as hard as you ever have before to put me away, and maybe you can’t. It’s when I get in the ring with guys like Johnny Rebel and give him the biggest challenge he has ever faced as the Overdrive Champion, and who knows? Maybe I get in the ring with him and, “Simply Put”, I connect with a Hangover and end the night as the new champ. All I am saying is that you CAN NOT determine who’s the best by time in service. You just have to take two people and put them against each other until one wins, then HE is the best.
However, sometimes, I do have to just take out the trash a little bit. Seems that Dairy Queen doesn’t like that I picked him out as a target. But, see. this here is exactly what I am trying to achieve here in APW. Quinn came out and posted a promo and it was...well, it was. If I don’t show up, that’s all we hear from Quinn until MAYBE a day or two before the Overdrive show next week. He doesn’t get any fanfare, he probably fights an non-televised warm-up match, and, assuming he wins, it’s another week or two before anyone not attending live ever sees Dan Quinn. Enter my random attack. Suddenly, the prideful Brit can not let me comments tarnish his reputation while he’s still 0-0, so he immediately begins to fire verbal volleys back at me, and suddenly, we have a feud before either of us even debut. President Jeff would be completely reckless to NOT book the two of us against each other as soon as possible, and with the amount of traffic we have sent towards APW through my twitter account and our combined posts on ActionPackedWrestling.tk, the fans will want to see this match on TV. Out of nowhere, you and I have one of the most anticipated debuts in recent memory in APW and, seeing as how you seem to strongly desire making my first APW match my last, we are going to put on a show, aren’t we? THAT’S ALL I WANT FROM YOU, DAIRY QUEEN! You have stepped your game up. You are preparing to bring a “Blizzard” of hurt...sorry, I just couldn’t resist.
Now, I do not apologize for expounding upon my history. I’m new to this particular audience, and I deserve to have the highlights of my career brought as evidence of my high level of potential here. I know you want to harp on that because you aren’t smart enough to find anything else to think about, and that’s fine. You are perfectly entitled to trying to discredit my past accolades. The bottom line is that I have illustrated my point that I know a thing or two about this business, both in and out of that ring. When I say “brawlers have no chance against seasoned wrestlers”, it’s because I have experienced first-hand how much of a disadvantage you put yourself in when you have no concept of grappling. That Hardcore Era that you missed because your debut came AFTER all that concussion research came about, yeah THAT was when DOZENS and DOZENS of people came from the woodworks of alley fighting, backyard wrestling, and the like and decided to try their hand at professional wrestling. What promotions got left with were a bunch of people that were entertaining personalities that the crowd wanted to see...but their most technical maneuver was “chair shot”. So the Hardcore Title was born in hundreds of places around the world, and an era was created. Do you understand why the Hardcore Title exists, Queen? IT’S BECAUSE GUYS LIKE YOU HAVE NO BUSINESS BEING IN A WRESTLING RING! They gave “brawlers” their own title so they wouldn’t waste people’s time. When fans tune into Overdrive, they are tuning in to see WRESTLING. If they want to see a bunch of idiots punching each other for no reason, they can just YouTube “Kimbo Slice”.
And then come the lies to protect your image. I get it, Dan. You have to convince the world that you are some scary British bulldog who doesn’t care about money or fame and simply wants the opportunity to legally punch people over and over. If that’s the case, get the HELL out of this wrestling company and go try your luck in MMA. At least there, it’s okay to just stand around punching each other because that’s what their fan base is looking for. Let’s call a spade a spade, Dairy Queen. You try and act like all you want to do is hurt people, and you compare yourself to an animal like once the bell sounds you will be unleashed and just punch and kick and attack people mercilessly until they are unconscious. Okay, then explain this. ActionPackedWrestling.tk is a WONDERFUL website where fans can find out anything they want to know about their favorite APW superstars, and one of the important things about wrestling is that finishing move...that move or submission hold that you have been perfecting over the years so that it is as lethal as possible, and that, if you are smart, the entire match is a buildup to that moment. That finishing move tells a lot about a wrestler; after all, a Super Heavyweight isn’t going to use the Shooting Star Press, and I doubt a technical submission expert is going to waste his time working any kind of modified Ace Crusher as his big-time move. So, what is the finishing move of a guy who, and I am paraphrasing here, “is a mean brawler who just wants to hurt people and make them BLEED and make their BONES break and make them cry out in PAIN”...what is his finisher?
A top rope elbow drop. That’s right folks. We are supposed to believe that Dan Quinn is going to spend minute after minute pounding away at his opponent until his knuckles and his opponent’s forehead are matching shades of blood-red, then he will stop, leave his opponent alone long enough to climb the turnbuckle and drop an elbow on his opponent.
Now, don’t get me wrong: I’ve taken moves like that before, and they are no joke. A well-placed elbow to the sternum and you can’t even breathe, much less kick out from a pin attempt. But, that’s not the move of an insane brawler. At least, that’s not the signature move of a REAL insane brawler.
In other words, Dairy Queen, you are who you are. You are a professional wrestler who does not have but the most minimal of wrestling education and talent, so you try to hide it with brawling and bravado. And, since I am supposed to buy into it, you get to act like it ISN’T the exact kind of pointless hype that you accused me of doing with my career rehash. Let me also mention that I threw that out there with brevity; you have been trying to sell me on this insane brawler crap continuously from day one. And I’m not buying it, Dairy Queen. I’m not buying it for one moment. Maybe some of the other guys will give you your credit but I won’t, because I know that you are going to be just like me. You are going to battle your opponent until you think you can knock him out for three seconds, and not one moment longer. You are NOT going to go in there and spend an hour bloodying up some opponent. You are going to punch him repeatedly, since that’s clearly the only move in your repertoire, but, when you feel the moment is right, you are going to knock him down, connect with that elbow drop, and try to call it a day. That doesn’t make you any more ruthless or insane than me. So, for all your boasting, you are actually NO DIFFERENT than the guys who tried to talk little kids into attacking their opponents before the match. NONE. Now, look yourself in the mirror long and hard and accept THAT fact, because you will never accomplish anything in this business until you do.
Or, you know what? Don’t. Don’t look in that mirror, and continue to leave in that dream world where guys like you can scare guys like me, because you are EXACTLY the kind of guy I should debut against so that people can get an understanding of what it means to be the harbinger of a Golden Age in Action Packed Wrestling. So, go ahead and keep on pretending, because for brawlers like you...
...This is the End 0f the W0rld!
You know what’s great about catchphrases? Pretty soon, when you sign out your personal camera technician, he starts to figure out really fast that that usually means that the scene has reached its conclusion. But before the scene completely fades, Kid Dynamo hoists up the “EW” hand sign, with “Follow @kiddynamoapw on Twitter!” appearing under the hand gesture on the screen. After a moment, the screen fades out.
Therefore, in honor of the IWC and how insanely huge it has gotten since the popularization of YouTube and Twitter, I present to you: a promo that could ABSOLUTELY take place.
The scene opens up in a hotel. On a scale of 1 to 10, 1 being a place that truckers and prostitutes would call “dirty” and 10 being the kind of place that Donald Trump would call “pricey”, it’s about a 3. In other words, if it were any worse, it would be a MOTEL.
Our hero is on the phone. I don’t really know what font color the Prez would prefer so I’ll just paraphrase here that he is touching base with his new boss to confirm that he has permission to discuss the almost-nil he knows about APW in this interview with a podcast that very few people listen to. The Prez, clearly with some management classes under his belt, does an expert job of pretending that he doesn’t have a MILLION things to do in preparing for the New Year’s Day Asylum and answers Dynamo’s questions about what can and can’t be said.
For the record, this is serious stuff. Were Dynamo to get kicked out of here, it would not be the first time, and that was before he had a Twitter account.
We skip ahead to the literally phoned-in interview. Obviously, you shouldn’t be able to hear the questions being asked, so let’s make a game out of it. After reading this interview, feel free to tweet your ideas for what the questions were to @kiddynamoapw.
...yeah thanks for having me on the show.
...Well, I’m FROM New Orleans originally, though I have made quite a few pit stops along the way. I’ve been in the business since May 1999 when I debuted as Incubus in MVW. A couple of gimmick changes and I finally debuted the Kid Dynamo moniker in July of that year and, well, excepting the three times I donned a mask and different name to hide who I was for the sake of my return or debut in a new place, that’s been who I’ve been.
...No, I’m not Shannon Moore. I know he used the name too, but that’s all it is is a name. Honestly, I pulled the name from a superhero in a comic book who was essentially the Human Torch but with electricity instead of fire. But, again, it’s just a name. I’ve had people ask me why I haven’t changed it, especially when I get guys overusing the “Kid” part to either call me a rookie or a pedophile, but, well, it’s just a name. Uncreative people are going to use the “Kid” prefix as a crutch anywhere I go. If I just changed it to “Dynamo” and took the kid off, it’d be like my time as Kid Dynamo stops existing. Like I said, I went through a lot of name changes and gimmicks to get to him, and, well, I’m proud to be “Kid Dynamo”.
...I picked APW because I am tired and tired of being in a place that is “on the cusp” of greatness. MVW was an indy that was going to profit huge off of the Hardcore Era of wrestling. OWF was an insanely-respect indy, but it was still an indy, and since some big time promotions had shut down around that time, no network wanted to take a risk like that. ASW was based in Canada and they just never got a following in the US. APW has TV shows, a rabid fan base, and, best of all, some of the best talents I have seen in this most recent generation of wrestlers. This place is the best right now, and it’s about time I made a name for myself somewhere where it will hold water on a national level.
...Quinn and Kash are just enemies of circumstance. Dan Quinn signed on the same day as me, so I already knew a little bit about him. So I just figured I’d pick a random opponent so that the fans could get an idea of who I am, and, well, why not pick the guy most statistically probable to be my debut opponent? As for Jason Kash, he and I have been going back and forth on Twitter a little bit. I’m trying to plant the seed for taking some of us guys that are looking to make a big splash and put us in a big showcase match and put a title shot on the line or something. You know, “Let’s see what these guys can do”, right? Kash doesn’t seem to think that that would be the right thing to do. After all, most tenured guys don’t like the idea that someone can be zero and zero and be better than them.
...I’m just saying the same thing I’m saying on Twitter, let’s determine who’s best by what happens in the ring instead of who’s been under contract the longest.
...I actually think I’d rather an Overdrive Title shot than trying to jump all the way up to the World Title. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I do NOT expect to be X and 0 the whole time I’m here. I expect to take my share of losses, but why not get in the mix as early as possible? I’d rather get the opportunity early to take on Johnny Rebel than wait for months until there’s no one left for me to face but champions. I’ll probably lose to Rebel the first time I face him, but you never know, and taking a tough loss against a respected opponent in APW is going to be better for me than eight wins in a row against the lower half of the spectrum. Besides, I’m good with sitting on that Overdrive Title for a while. I like the idea of being the champion of an entire show. I mean, there’s so much there. I could argue that, even though Nate Havok is the World Champion, he’s a member of the Overdrive roster and I’m the Overdrive champion, so I outrank him. Instant controversy. There’s of course the guy who’s been here months and months and never had a whiff of a championship belt and here I’d be earning it in relatively no time. Instant controversy. Plus, people wouldn’t have to pay to see me like they would the World Champ.
...Yeah, thanks for having me.
...Anytime.
Kid Dynamo hangs up the phone. He then looks straight at the camera. He doesn’t look surprised because, well, that would be stupid. He OBVIOUSLY let the cameraman in, explained to him that he wanted him to record his podcast interview, and then that he was going to get to some good ol’ trash talk. A look of surprise would be like pretending Dan Quinn was scary. Just pointless.
Man, I hope you guys and girls out there in the APW fanbase are as excited as I am. I am serious about making 2012 the year that a new era of greatness is ushered into this company, and what a week to start it off. Asylum on New YEar’s Day in my hometown of N’awlins, and then after that the first Overdrive of 2012. No doubt the new stars will get their chance to shine on that night, and it’s going to be great.
But, before we ever get there, it seems like I am already making enemies. First off, there’s Jason Kash. Apparently, Kash doesn’t like the idea of people like me without tenure here in APW earning a title shot. But, clearly Kash is a man of the past. After all, just a day or two ago, he was talking about how there was no way Havok would take his World Title away...and no, that wasn’t in the past tense; he said it like he thinks he’s still the champ and Christmas Chaos hasn’t happened yet, so maybe he’s off in some fantasy world where new guys have to scratch and claw their way up the mountain an inch at a time. That’s great and all, but I don’t need to prove myself. I just need an opportunity. I don’t even have to win. I told you before that I am in this because I am going to elevate APW to a new level. And I do that by fighting the best, not just the rest. I can open shows with Dan Quinn, Rick Sader, and future newcomers to APW but what does that accomplish? No, Kash, it’s when I get in the ring with guys like you and make you have to work as hard as you ever have before to put me away, and maybe you can’t. It’s when I get in the ring with guys like Johnny Rebel and give him the biggest challenge he has ever faced as the Overdrive Champion, and who knows? Maybe I get in the ring with him and, “Simply Put”, I connect with a Hangover and end the night as the new champ. All I am saying is that you CAN NOT determine who’s the best by time in service. You just have to take two people and put them against each other until one wins, then HE is the best.
However, sometimes, I do have to just take out the trash a little bit. Seems that Dairy Queen doesn’t like that I picked him out as a target. But, see. this here is exactly what I am trying to achieve here in APW. Quinn came out and posted a promo and it was...well, it was. If I don’t show up, that’s all we hear from Quinn until MAYBE a day or two before the Overdrive show next week. He doesn’t get any fanfare, he probably fights an non-televised warm-up match, and, assuming he wins, it’s another week or two before anyone not attending live ever sees Dan Quinn. Enter my random attack. Suddenly, the prideful Brit can not let me comments tarnish his reputation while he’s still 0-0, so he immediately begins to fire verbal volleys back at me, and suddenly, we have a feud before either of us even debut. President Jeff would be completely reckless to NOT book the two of us against each other as soon as possible, and with the amount of traffic we have sent towards APW through my twitter account and our combined posts on ActionPackedWrestling.tk, the fans will want to see this match on TV. Out of nowhere, you and I have one of the most anticipated debuts in recent memory in APW and, seeing as how you seem to strongly desire making my first APW match my last, we are going to put on a show, aren’t we? THAT’S ALL I WANT FROM YOU, DAIRY QUEEN! You have stepped your game up. You are preparing to bring a “Blizzard” of hurt...sorry, I just couldn’t resist.
Now, I do not apologize for expounding upon my history. I’m new to this particular audience, and I deserve to have the highlights of my career brought as evidence of my high level of potential here. I know you want to harp on that because you aren’t smart enough to find anything else to think about, and that’s fine. You are perfectly entitled to trying to discredit my past accolades. The bottom line is that I have illustrated my point that I know a thing or two about this business, both in and out of that ring. When I say “brawlers have no chance against seasoned wrestlers”, it’s because I have experienced first-hand how much of a disadvantage you put yourself in when you have no concept of grappling. That Hardcore Era that you missed because your debut came AFTER all that concussion research came about, yeah THAT was when DOZENS and DOZENS of people came from the woodworks of alley fighting, backyard wrestling, and the like and decided to try their hand at professional wrestling. What promotions got left with were a bunch of people that were entertaining personalities that the crowd wanted to see...but their most technical maneuver was “chair shot”. So the Hardcore Title was born in hundreds of places around the world, and an era was created. Do you understand why the Hardcore Title exists, Queen? IT’S BECAUSE GUYS LIKE YOU HAVE NO BUSINESS BEING IN A WRESTLING RING! They gave “brawlers” their own title so they wouldn’t waste people’s time. When fans tune into Overdrive, they are tuning in to see WRESTLING. If they want to see a bunch of idiots punching each other for no reason, they can just YouTube “Kimbo Slice”.
And then come the lies to protect your image. I get it, Dan. You have to convince the world that you are some scary British bulldog who doesn’t care about money or fame and simply wants the opportunity to legally punch people over and over. If that’s the case, get the HELL out of this wrestling company and go try your luck in MMA. At least there, it’s okay to just stand around punching each other because that’s what their fan base is looking for. Let’s call a spade a spade, Dairy Queen. You try and act like all you want to do is hurt people, and you compare yourself to an animal like once the bell sounds you will be unleashed and just punch and kick and attack people mercilessly until they are unconscious. Okay, then explain this. ActionPackedWrestling.tk is a WONDERFUL website where fans can find out anything they want to know about their favorite APW superstars, and one of the important things about wrestling is that finishing move...that move or submission hold that you have been perfecting over the years so that it is as lethal as possible, and that, if you are smart, the entire match is a buildup to that moment. That finishing move tells a lot about a wrestler; after all, a Super Heavyweight isn’t going to use the Shooting Star Press, and I doubt a technical submission expert is going to waste his time working any kind of modified Ace Crusher as his big-time move. So, what is the finishing move of a guy who, and I am paraphrasing here, “is a mean brawler who just wants to hurt people and make them BLEED and make their BONES break and make them cry out in PAIN”...what is his finisher?
A top rope elbow drop. That’s right folks. We are supposed to believe that Dan Quinn is going to spend minute after minute pounding away at his opponent until his knuckles and his opponent’s forehead are matching shades of blood-red, then he will stop, leave his opponent alone long enough to climb the turnbuckle and drop an elbow on his opponent.
Now, don’t get me wrong: I’ve taken moves like that before, and they are no joke. A well-placed elbow to the sternum and you can’t even breathe, much less kick out from a pin attempt. But, that’s not the move of an insane brawler. At least, that’s not the signature move of a REAL insane brawler.
In other words, Dairy Queen, you are who you are. You are a professional wrestler who does not have but the most minimal of wrestling education and talent, so you try to hide it with brawling and bravado. And, since I am supposed to buy into it, you get to act like it ISN’T the exact kind of pointless hype that you accused me of doing with my career rehash. Let me also mention that I threw that out there with brevity; you have been trying to sell me on this insane brawler crap continuously from day one. And I’m not buying it, Dairy Queen. I’m not buying it for one moment. Maybe some of the other guys will give you your credit but I won’t, because I know that you are going to be just like me. You are going to battle your opponent until you think you can knock him out for three seconds, and not one moment longer. You are NOT going to go in there and spend an hour bloodying up some opponent. You are going to punch him repeatedly, since that’s clearly the only move in your repertoire, but, when you feel the moment is right, you are going to knock him down, connect with that elbow drop, and try to call it a day. That doesn’t make you any more ruthless or insane than me. So, for all your boasting, you are actually NO DIFFERENT than the guys who tried to talk little kids into attacking their opponents before the match. NONE. Now, look yourself in the mirror long and hard and accept THAT fact, because you will never accomplish anything in this business until you do.
Or, you know what? Don’t. Don’t look in that mirror, and continue to leave in that dream world where guys like you can scare guys like me, because you are EXACTLY the kind of guy I should debut against so that people can get an understanding of what it means to be the harbinger of a Golden Age in Action Packed Wrestling. So, go ahead and keep on pretending, because for brawlers like you...
...This is the End 0f the W0rld!
You know what’s great about catchphrases? Pretty soon, when you sign out your personal camera technician, he starts to figure out really fast that that usually means that the scene has reached its conclusion. But before the scene completely fades, Kid Dynamo hoists up the “EW” hand sign, with “Follow @kiddynamoapw on Twitter!” appearing under the hand gesture on the screen. After a moment, the screen fades out.
