The Farewell Tour #2: Kansas Challenge

[Smash INC]

Keaton Saint in...
The Farewell Tour #2: Kansas Challenge

Two weeks left until the farewell becomes a reality. Two more challenges to face in the ring before a new set of challenges arise out of it. I reach the end of my journey at Shockwave, a journey that has taken place in the sporting realm I have considered my home. It's fitting that I enter Kansas just before I end my time in the sport, because much like Dorothy wasn't in Kansas when she entered the mad fantasy of Oz, I won't be in a familiar place once the bell rings for the victor at Shockwave. I'm leaving home soon, but I still have a job to do before that happens.

On one side, Logan Alexander and Reaver make a pairing that challenges the mind and body. On the other side, they're a pairing that don't match, much like comparing apples to pears or oranges. I want to say that provides an advantage, in some way it does provide a little respite from the possibility of facing a well-oiled team with no chinks in the armour. If there was to be an advantage however, the same issue would not have to apply to the Guv'nor and myself as well. As a team, we have the capabilities to test the mind to the limit and the body to the very last drop of sweat. That comes with the possible problem that we won't gel together in the ring and that our connection will be weaker than that of Reaver and Logan Alexander. Matches like these test the most able-bodied wrestlers in the sport, it's going to come close to killing me at this rate.

No secret is made of my hometown, I am a Londoner. Much like the Guv'nor, I hail from the same city. Therein lies a problem we both have to face, London doesn't work like a lot of cities in the world because it's akin to having more than thirty small countries fighting over their individuality at once. Guv'nor has his upbringing and I have mine, we're worlds apart in some respects and we're on the same street in others. A lot of fans who don't have the inside knowledge on London will look at this match and assume that the advantage goes to us by virtue of our nationality and our home. It's farther from the truth than they know. There's North London, South London, East and West London. That just marks the first layer of separation, then you have to deal with the boroughs and the post codes. The streets and the estates play a part as well, if you don't represent a certain part then you may as well be from a different country. Until the bell rings, I could be a foreign entity to the Guv'nor regardless of our plans. That makes this more difficult than it should be.

But this is exactly what I signed up for as a wrestler and even to the very last moment I have in the ring, I'm still able to face new challenges like this. There's the line about an old dog and new tricks but the truth of this is simple, I have a couple of good matches left in me and I will do everything to make this a great one. Two weeks away from Shockwave and the lasting thought in my mind is how this match and the following one with Bailey both come with a side order of finality. What happens here is set in stone, I won't get a chance to correct any mistakes and I certainly won't be able to live them down. Guv'nor will have a chance to make amends, I won't. Because I don't have that luxury of a second chance, I have to make the absolute most of this one. I don't need any other reason beyond that, but I've got just enough to push myself even further.

I haven't forgotten the time Reaver punched me in the back of the neck, it might be the right time to bring this up as I'm still unsure what set the clock ticking on my career. My debut match happened a long time ago and yet I was able to wrestle for years past that point, Reaver punching me wasn't as long ago as other things that are bringing my career to an end but there is still a chance that it played a part. I could be facing the man who helped push me over the edge, the man who may have put just enough pressure on me in a single moment that my body just rebelled against it all. Every analysis I've seen and every doctor I've had words with has said that my career is ending because of a long-term issue with my lower back, I believe them enough to take it as gospel. But sometimes I have to wonder about these things and Reaver hurt me enough in that single moment that I begin to think about what sort of damage he did to me. I have a single chance to measure myself against a man who inflicted a great deal of pain to me once upon a time. Rasslemania brought a lot of things to a head, Reaver mentioned then in jest that he was just a guy in a mask. He's more than that, as dangerous as that implies. For this match and for the moment the bell rings, he's not a guy in a mask. He is my foe, my opponent and in some way he will be my nemesis. Reaver will be put to the test in Kansas, but it will be MY test and if he fails it then I assure the fans watching that he will not be standing at the end of it.

As far as Logan Alexander is concerned, the night he came and took my last chance to enter Test for the Best was the night I finally caught wind that something had changed in me. I won't knock his achievements in the ring, but it takes a moment like that to realise that things are different. Logan Alexander is a name I can add to those who have created barriers between me and my efforts to end the reign of Terry Marvin. It's a sobering thought to know that I'm going to leave APW knowing that despite all my efforts, the closest I ever got to beating Terry Marvin when it truly mattered was before he became the BIG champion and before he really began to cement himself. He rose, I fell. Logan Alexander was a barrier to my entry at Test for the Best and he ended up proving to be too much of one for me to overcome. It's how I knew something was wrong in me, the desire to be at that event was more than anything I had felt in my time in APW but my body wasn't up to the task. That had never been the case before, it was always a combination of my mind and my body not matching up rather than one side fully giving out. It's part of the reason I'm standing just two weeks away from the end of my career in wrestling. My body isn't ready for many more challenges, but I am ready for one or two big tasks. Beating Logan Alexander is one of them, because I need to know if that victory was his ascension or my failure. I need to know if Logan Alexander is really the better athlete for more than one night. I need to be sure of where I stand and I only have a single chance to accomplish that. I need to fit the pieces of the puzzle together, by wrestling my heart out and finding out just how far Logan Alexander is willing to go. I wonder if he's immune to tapping out because I still have the strength to use the clutch.

At the end of it all, I'll know who I am and where I stand before the end comes. I don't have to wear a mask or look to a title to decide who I am. I've worn both at different times and for different reasons. Logan Alexander may turn around and say he's a champion, but I'm more than that. Reaver may say he's too crazy for the rest of the roster but he knows he still has to wrestler after Shockwave, I don't have that holding me back. I'm crazy enough to put everything into this match because I know I have an hourglass running to the very last drop of time. Even Guv'nor harks back to something that I know isn't real, the Hackney he was made in doesn't exist anymore. The Olympics changed the place, it's not the kind of Hackney that can give birth to men and wrestlers like him. They're all being phased out for part-timers who reside there, who are changing the scope of that place to something unrecognisable. I wrestled in Hackney, I know the ins and outs of York Hall like my own hand and I know that the borough is forever changed. At least Best Turkish is still good, some things never change.

Logan Alexander is a champion, Reaver consults with the extremities of the human condition and Guv'nor calls back to a bygone era. They all represent their own part of the spectrum, much like I hold my own colour. I know who I am when the bell rings and I know who I will be when the match is over. I won't change in Kansas and I won't falter as long as my body withstands the pressure. That is the mark of the Patron Saint of Wrestling, that is who I am. THE Keaton Saint.

I can look in the mirror now and say for certain I don't just see a wrestler, I see a Saint. I see the Saint that will march to the ring with the same purpose as any other date or time in his life, I see the Saint that will fight to the last breath to prove his worth. I see the man who will stare down the end of the world and crack his knuckles in anticipation.

The end is coming for Keaton Saint, but it's an ending I have some control over. The same control that allows me to claim with utmost certainty and sincerity that I will carry on in some way.

Keaton Saint WILL carry on.