Post by Johnny Rebel on Aug 8, 2012 22:24:46 GMT -4
Rebel’s Rousing #5:
“New Beginnings”“Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.”
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The look on “Simply Put” Johnny Rebel’s face said it all: boredom, disgust and disdain. He folded his arms across his chest and leaned up against the doorframe as Asylum general manager Reginald Schmidt marched to the podium.
“It’s my pleasure to announce to you the newest addition to the Asylum brand of APW…Johnny Rebel!”
The slew of reporters clapped politely as Schmidt leaned over to wave on the former Overdrive champion. Rebel entered with his full entourage in tow, including Mr. Phoenix Wrestling, his chief financial investor. It was odd seeing Rebel without Sarah close behind but sometimes that’s how the cookie crumbles. Rebel takes a seat in front of a bevy of microphones with Mr. PW occupying the spot to his left.
“Don’t embarrass me,” Reginald whispered in passing, “That’s an order!”
Mr. Schmidt wasn’t thrilled with the prospect of having to deal with Rebel after seeing how he interacted with President Jeff on Overdrive. The presence of Mr. PW, who represented Phoenix Wrestling on the True Expert’s Inner Council, put the entire Asylum leadership team on edge.
“Eat me!” the newest Asylum megastar responded in true Rebel fashion, drawing the ire from Reginald and a few snickers from the reporters in attendance.
“Mr. Rebel will be taking questions now,” Mr. PW said in to the microphone causing a fury of hands to jump up.
“Adam Shupank,” the man said holding up his notepad, “I’m with the New York Times. An obvious question here…why the jump to Asylum? You have spent the last year rambling to anybody who would listen that Overdrive was the place to be.”
“Well,” Rebel began with a smirk on his face, “I know there are whispers going around that I couldn’t hack it on Overdrive and that I’d never topple Kurt Noble for the Undisputed Championship. Let me remind those morons that I’ve done it once and I could do it again with my eyes closed! It began to spiral out of control when I associated myself with the Sindicate and Level-One. It was obvious that they were only using me to get what they wanted and once Mr. PW made that clear to me at the beginning of the Extreme Tournament…I knew that I only had one choice: jump ship before things started to get ugly! Besides, I’ve done everything that I could have possibly wanted to do on Overdrive. Asylum needs some star power…have you seen their champion? Anthony Bailey? Are you serious, Reginald? I beat him with one arm tied behind my back months ago. Mr. PW advised me that this was the way to go and got the contract all drawn up.”
“You have me to thank!” Mr. PW nods before leaning in to the microphone, “We will have Rebel brand approved Asylum tea kettles coming to an arena near you!”
“So, in a nutshell, I’m here to set this place straight. It wasn’t a secret that this place was festering before I arrived a little over a year ago. The Overdrive championship wasn’t worth jack squat! I turned it into something to be valued and I’m going to do the same here on the Asylm brand.” Rebel leaned backwards and nonchalantly kicked his feet up, causing Schmidt to turn a brand new shade of red. “Next!”
“Johnny,” a woman stands up in the front row, “Amanda Comack from the Washington Post. Your first match on the brand is against the only man you have ever faced on the Asylum roster, Anthony Bailey. A lot has changed since the last time you two squared off, don’t you think?”
Rebel takes a moment to ponder his response before pulling a microphone off the stand and pulling it up to his mouth.
“I’m sorry,” Rebel’s seems confused, “What’s changed? What’s different than back in December when I wiped the mat with that pipsqueek? He’s made a name off of beating mouth-breathers and booger-eaters over here on Asylum. He’s spending the majority of his time wiping the rear of his inmate family members and thumb-wrestling with Jason Kash. Believe me…he may have honed his skills inside the ring but when it comes to handling the mind games of Johnny Rebel, he’ll fold faster than Sally Talfourd around a table of all you can eat ham sandwiches!”
Mr. PW reaches out his hand for a fist-bump as the two share a laugh at Sally’s expense.
“I’ve got time for one more question,” Rebel mumbles, “Make it a good one!”
Reginald is none-to-pleased with Rebel’s lack of maturity and warns him to behave with a finger point.
“Mark Gonzales, Chicago Tribune,” a gentleman tips his hat towards Rebel before being cut-off.
“Finally!” Rebel shouts. “Somebody with some class! You can always depend on a man from Chicago to bring the party!”
“We know that you’re looking forward to getting another chance at Anthony Bailey…but what are you looking to accomplish on the Asylum brand? We also know that Mr. PW is playing a big role in your claim to become the True Expert…but why is he tagging along here in the APW? Doesn’t he represent Phoenix Wrestling?” Mr. Gonzales asks.
“Two excellent questions,” Rebel says sliding his trademark sunglasses over the bridge of his nose. “I wouldn’t have expected anything less from a man of such great standing! I’m not looking for anything other than the respect that I deserve. I wasn’t getting it on the Overdrive brand and so I thought I’d throw my name in the running over here. You can see that it didn’t take long to find my value! My buddy Reg’ added me to the main event of my very first Asylum appearance.”
“Which,” Reginald interrupts with a pained expression over his face, “You decided to no-show.”
“Excuse me,” Rebel clears his throat, “I had something more important to do, like sign copies of my new Children’s book! Even after that little miscommunication took place, the Asylum team was so dependent on my name to sell tickets that they threw me in the main event without a hesitation against their precious World Heavyweight Champion. Do you see a pattern beginning to develop here? I’m not in it for the championships and I don’t want to leapfrog anyone else in the standings. My sole purpose is to eradicate the APW of those who aren’t worthy of competing on such a high level. I have my eyes on a few megastars here but in the meantime, they may not like me…but they will respect me!”
“I’ll handle the second part of that question, Johnny,” Mr. PW cuts in. “I’m here for one reason…we have a lot of money invested in Rebel and me and my financial team want to make sure that he’s being used properly. We may represent Phoenix Wrestling and that might make a few of you uncomfortable but our number one priority is that Mr. Rebel succeeds and continues to make the Rebel brand a household name. I’m not going anywhere anytime soon!”
“That’s all the time we have this evening. Stick around…maybe Reginald will give Anthony Bailey some more undeserved attention!”
Rebel’s last jab at Bailey causes Reginald to chase after him in to the hallway but Johnny’s mob of backers creates a wall between the two of them as the former Overdrive champion disappears in to the distance.
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“Anthony Bailey. It’s wonderful to see you again!”
“I realize that you are big in to this change thing…but look around, kid, you aren’t the only one who has added some guns to the arsenal. You’re sadly mistaken if you believe I’ve sat back and allowed pathetic inbreeds like you pass me up in the ring! While you have one thing correct: I’ve done waaay more than you could ever dream of in this business…my career isn’t on the way down! I’ve lapped you on more than one occasion and this week on Asylum, I begin my victory lap.”
“I’m on top of the world and you want to claim that I’m nearing the end? If I’m so close to the end than why do you keep hitching your wagon on that one time you got to step in the ring with me? There isn’t a week that goes by where you don’t mention my name and how you blew your one and only chance of being great?
“You’re so self-absorbed that when somebody extends a hand to you, the only thing you can think about is how you can leech off of their success!”
“I see that a fluke victory over the champion has gone to your head. You mentioned previously that you have toppled every since impediment that has been put before you. Allow me to reintroduce myself: I’m ‘Simply Put’ Johnny Rebel and I’ve already embarrassed you once before! Not only are you cocky and arrogant but you’re also liar! You can save your threats and promises because like Sally’s skirt there isn’t anything underneath them! You’re an idle threat that talks a big game that won’t hold up when put to the test!”
“You need to simple come to terms with the fact that you’re not worth the main event slow that Schmidt has handed to you on a silver platter…just like everything else you have been given in your pathetic misguided universe. Your purpose on the card is to give the fans time to go and hit the concession stand before the true megastars grace the ring!”
“Your whole schtick is tired and played out. This hero, good-guy, phoney bologna crap is embarrassing. I don’t know how you are able to stand in front of a mirror and not break the glass because you’re embarrassed at what you see. I don’t know how you look your own mother in the eye knowing full well that you’d sell her up a river if it meant getting a foot ahead of the competition. I don’t know how you can lead your fans on with false hope, lies and fairy tales when you guarantee any other outcome of this match on Sunday evening ends with you not laying on your back and counting the lights.”
“And even though you keep chugging along like nothing has changed…you know there is something eating at you. It’s the fact that you want to be just like me!”
“The reality is that I will always be one step ahead of you. You can practice the art of positive thinking but it isn’t going to get you anywhere. Keep believing that you have learned the magic spell to finally overcome Johnny Rebel. Please hit the gym twice as hard, lift weights twice as heavy and follow it up with a diet that keeps that gut from spilling over your belt. Keep ignoring the mental aspect of this game and the fact that a match like this is won and lost before the bell even rings! You are the student and I’m the teacher…there is no changing that.”
“It’s no secret that the contenders list for the World Heavyweight Championship isn’t very long and the names on it are quite frankly a joke. Michael Callahan? Johnny Knuckles? Come on, folks! It’s no surprise that when I was finished running through Overdrive, Reginald would be begging me to come on over and save his sinking ship from the pirates that are currently holding it captive. I agreed to this rematch to show the entire world that really isn’t a worthy contender within the Asylum brand to carry the flag as champion! The same old guys who have proven they aren’t on par with my agility are given chance after chance. At this point, Reginald and the rest of his cabinet are throwing crap against the wall and hoping it sticks. Unfortunately for you, Bailey, I’ve had enough!”
#SIMPLY
#F’N
#PUT?
“I’m going to wipe your face off the Asylum map for good! That’s a promise.”
