Starve-forward (Bizarro for feedback)

[Kid Cannabis]

Has two years of rust hurt my game? Comments, please

[Your JESUS]

I enjoyed the flow of the address. Not bad at all. Also most people require a link for feedback.

[Jason Cashe]

I haven't had the pleasure of seeing your old work. However after reading this I will give you what caught my eye both positive and negative.

It was really spread out. I know bulk paragraphs look ugly but 3-5 sentences make a paragraph and it'd clean it up a bit more to use that. Spacing sentences out here and there makes me think it's someone else talking. Just keeps the pace more if you keep it together a bit more.

I liked how you played into the "Game" changing up and forgetting old names. Also who can hate a Game Of Thrones reference, just dope. I love that you're using BTS cause I myself had thought to use that a while back and never got around to doing it. The character seems live, very straight forward and filled with one liners. Getting to what you were before will be a great think to see.

[Kid Cannabis]

will definitley take the paragraph structure advice under advisement. Like I said, still got a few kinks to work out, but appreciate the honesty.