Post by John Chellios on Nov 4, 2012 1:31:29 GMT -4
"You think you know me?" is said by some hot-sounding slut over whatever speakers this particular brand of APW uses. The brand? Who gives a fuck. It's one of these APW shows, and that's all needed to know, for the moment. Fans are unsure how to feel about the crazy amount of fireworks exploding and the strobe lights seizuring overhead, but Dr. Dre's "Natural Born Killaz" is an 'OH SHIT' tune. And that would be the effect if someone newsworthy came out instead of this nappy-headed, lazy-eyed, bucktooth motherfucka wearing a "Special Friend 
" shirt and a steel chain with a xbox controller dangling in the middle.
Is that all he's bringing? Hell no. His attire couldn't be complete without a microphone in hand, his best friend, but not special.
John Chellios:
"Well, well, well. Look what we have here. Look who's still alive. It's me, the best in this business. The Legend. The Icon. The Headliner. The Main Event. The Showstopper. The Heartbreak Kid. The Game. The Best In The World At What He Does. The Unforgettable Fire. The UNDERTAKER! Yeah, I am all that, and more."
No one in this crowd recognizes him as such.
John Chellios:
"All of you should be glad that I am here to save this stupid company from a disappointing end! Hell, let's be honest, things should've gotten crazy years ago, but, with the grace of god, things have managed, until now. I am here to end the APW!"
But you just said you'd save it?
John Chellios:
"I realize I just contradicted myself, but I don't give a damn."
Classic John.
John Chellios:
"As a matter of fact, all of you sodomites can go straight to hell!"
That's uncalled for, John. Really, what reason could possibly be behind that insult?
John Chellios:
"YOU FANS BETTER BOO ME."
It's very likely nobody is paying attention to John since this obviously is not part of the main program but filler to keep the crowd occupied.
John Chellios:
"This is bullshit. Really. Honestly. Seriously, this is a serious moment full of bullshit! Really. Honestly, do you people actually think you can get away with not booing me? Who in the HELL do you think YOU ARE?!"
The fans, who make or break you.
John Chellios:
"I don't need any of you sodomites to become the greatest living wrestler of all time to ever NOT be an APW superstar, megastar, ultrastar, whatever the hell these losers consider themselves. You know why? Because I already am! Now, having just accomplished that goal, in a matter of minutes, if not seconds, I need a new goal. Oh, I suppose it'll be signing with the APW! But, which brand? There can only be one, you see. Only one brand to claim the irresistible, John Chellios."
Lifting his shirt, Chellios reveals his bloated belly and smiles a twisted one.
John Chellios:
"But, ladies, sort yourselves out - form a single filed line, and one-by-one, I will sort your hearts."
This conjures some laughter.
John Chellios:
"Yeah, you like that, hoes? Well, like I already said, huehuehue, things are about to get a whole lot interesting with me around. Pop out those sodas, light up them candy sticks, and get ready to journey through the career of a natural born killa!"
Chucking the microphone off into a random section of the audience, Chellios turns around, pulls down his jeans and moons the camera, to much disdain! Ew, he just farted. Laughing hysterically, Chellios pulls up his jeans and runs to the backstage, goofy.
" shirt and a steel chain with a xbox controller dangling in the middle.Is that all he's bringing? Hell no. His attire couldn't be complete without a microphone in hand, his best friend, but not special.
John Chellios:
"Well, well, well. Look what we have here. Look who's still alive. It's me, the best in this business. The Legend. The Icon. The Headliner. The Main Event. The Showstopper. The Heartbreak Kid. The Game. The Best In The World At What He Does. The Unforgettable Fire. The UNDERTAKER! Yeah, I am all that, and more."
No one in this crowd recognizes him as such.
John Chellios:
"All of you should be glad that I am here to save this stupid company from a disappointing end! Hell, let's be honest, things should've gotten crazy years ago, but, with the grace of god, things have managed, until now. I am here to end the APW!"
But you just said you'd save it?
John Chellios:
"I realize I just contradicted myself, but I don't give a damn."
Classic John.
John Chellios:
"As a matter of fact, all of you sodomites can go straight to hell!"
That's uncalled for, John. Really, what reason could possibly be behind that insult?
John Chellios:
"YOU FANS BETTER BOO ME."
It's very likely nobody is paying attention to John since this obviously is not part of the main program but filler to keep the crowd occupied.
John Chellios:
"This is bullshit. Really. Honestly. Seriously, this is a serious moment full of bullshit! Really. Honestly, do you people actually think you can get away with not booing me? Who in the HELL do you think YOU ARE?!"
The fans, who make or break you.
John Chellios:
"I don't need any of you sodomites to become the greatest living wrestler of all time to ever NOT be an APW superstar, megastar, ultrastar, whatever the hell these losers consider themselves. You know why? Because I already am! Now, having just accomplished that goal, in a matter of minutes, if not seconds, I need a new goal. Oh, I suppose it'll be signing with the APW! But, which brand? There can only be one, you see. Only one brand to claim the irresistible, John Chellios."
Lifting his shirt, Chellios reveals his bloated belly and smiles a twisted one.
John Chellios:
"But, ladies, sort yourselves out - form a single filed line, and one-by-one, I will sort your hearts."
This conjures some laughter.
John Chellios:
"Yeah, you like that, hoes? Well, like I already said, huehuehue, things are about to get a whole lot interesting with me around. Pop out those sodas, light up them candy sticks, and get ready to journey through the career of a natural born killa!"
Chucking the microphone off into a random section of the audience, Chellios turns around, pulls down his jeans and moons the camera, to much disdain! Ew, he just farted. Laughing hysterically, Chellios pulls up his jeans and runs to the backstage, goofy.
