Post by SalTal on Dec 22, 2012 23:57:17 GMT -4
As promised (albeit a long time ago), I said I would feedback on your recent character postings. It found it hard to do this, because focusing on a specific promo is what I do better. I can see the faults for the strengths and then I can sit down and cite specific ways to fix it. But fixing storylines? Or ideas? Yeah, I don't know how to do that exactly.
But I'll give it a go.
Strengths
1. You're hell reliable. And when I say reliable, I mean all the positive and the negative associated with that (negatives to come). The positives - the character is consistent through promos and carries on storylines as if one promo was written right after the other. This has obvious advantages as it creates a good amount of flow between your promos (at a time when a lot of people are struggling to create flow within their own promos, much less storylines). This creates a cohesiveness and an interest in the storyline, despite there being no 'bigness' to it (that is, no titles). It will get those people interested in the show (rather than titles or themselves) interested in the storyline. Continue to make close reference to the events that happen to move your storylines forward with a solid grounding.
2. There's a definite familiarity with the character, which helps in getting across the emotion of the character. For example, when the Knuckles-lunacy storyline started, the promos that you came out with oozed of anger and rage. This is a good essential to being someone right up the ladder. If you can't get across the feelings from inside the character, you can't get anything across. So keep up with that - make sure we can continue to feel what Kash is feeling. But, consider exploring some of the emotions that are outside the regular spectrum of 'go to' when it comes to storylines; there is more beyond happy, angry, and self-doubt.
3. I like that you're starting to include KJE in your promos. It gives it a new variety and interest. Continue to draw on other characters - I think that at this stage the Kash promos benefit from it immensely. It gives you a chance to explore some of the insight that Kash might not otherwise be able to share. Over the past year, you've explored all of the basics and the 'expected' of the Kash character - now it's time to push the boundaries and start looking at the things that a main eventer doesn't look at but a legend does. Take Kash to the next level with these new friends that you have here.
Weaknesses
1. Your promos, perhaps of late, lack a spark that we're seeing in some of this new talent and the top tier talent that's running now. There's something missing from it that makes me sit up every time you post. I think I generally know why though: Reliability. It's gone from being 'reliable Kash' to 'expected Kash'. I go in expecting you to say something about how great you were for being the World Champion (which was 6 months ago, give or take?), or something about Sally Talfourd, or how you helped build Asylum. I mean ... it's almost become a formula for your promos, and that's where it becomes weak. Not weak as in you will lose, but weak enough to not be stand-out memorable. Move on from the past, dwell in the present and the future is my advice here. Where is Kash going? What's in the future? What is he felling now, not what did he feel a year ago?
2. Technicalities. Punctuation and grammar are the best way to developing a strong voice in the promo. Otherwise ... it lacks the 'speaking to the reader' voice. While you might hear Kash in your head, rarely will a reader instantly click. Everyone speaks in a distinct and unique way, be it sentence structure or the way they end and start sentences, where they pause. There should be a distinct voice. I get that with a lot of people in APW (Noble is one. Lester is another. use them for models) but I never really got that from yours. I get the emotion, but I don't get the voice.
3. Slabs of trash talk. Yeah, I think I'm guilty of it too when I don't have a super-exciting idea to run with. I just start up a common setting/plot and fill in the significant details with slabs of trash talk. If you're going to be using other characters in your promo, you can have as much trash talk, just broken down, taking the essence out of what you want to say (which makes it much more powerful and insightful) and then say it with a new, more interesting setting. And then you will also have some words to develop the actions or the narrator's thoughts/ideas that you only pay cursory attention to at the moment.
Summary
Overall, you're still putting out the quality of promo that got you to the top. But, as with everything, change brings about challenges. With all these new and interesting characters coming in, the 'regulars' (like us) have to step up to keep that 'freshness' that we once had. You're promos are strong, and you will always have a grounding to fall back onto (the foundation never crumbles, just what we build around it), but you should now be pushing Kash into areas that are unfamiliar to you. If it's a fresh idea to you then it's bound to be a fresh idea to us all. That way, in no time, you'll be back on top.
But I'll give it a go.
Strengths
1. You're hell reliable. And when I say reliable, I mean all the positive and the negative associated with that (negatives to come). The positives - the character is consistent through promos and carries on storylines as if one promo was written right after the other. This has obvious advantages as it creates a good amount of flow between your promos (at a time when a lot of people are struggling to create flow within their own promos, much less storylines). This creates a cohesiveness and an interest in the storyline, despite there being no 'bigness' to it (that is, no titles). It will get those people interested in the show (rather than titles or themselves) interested in the storyline. Continue to make close reference to the events that happen to move your storylines forward with a solid grounding.
2. There's a definite familiarity with the character, which helps in getting across the emotion of the character. For example, when the Knuckles-lunacy storyline started, the promos that you came out with oozed of anger and rage. This is a good essential to being someone right up the ladder. If you can't get across the feelings from inside the character, you can't get anything across. So keep up with that - make sure we can continue to feel what Kash is feeling. But, consider exploring some of the emotions that are outside the regular spectrum of 'go to' when it comes to storylines; there is more beyond happy, angry, and self-doubt.
3. I like that you're starting to include KJE in your promos. It gives it a new variety and interest. Continue to draw on other characters - I think that at this stage the Kash promos benefit from it immensely. It gives you a chance to explore some of the insight that Kash might not otherwise be able to share. Over the past year, you've explored all of the basics and the 'expected' of the Kash character - now it's time to push the boundaries and start looking at the things that a main eventer doesn't look at but a legend does. Take Kash to the next level with these new friends that you have here.
Weaknesses
1. Your promos, perhaps of late, lack a spark that we're seeing in some of this new talent and the top tier talent that's running now. There's something missing from it that makes me sit up every time you post. I think I generally know why though: Reliability. It's gone from being 'reliable Kash' to 'expected Kash'. I go in expecting you to say something about how great you were for being the World Champion (which was 6 months ago, give or take?), or something about Sally Talfourd, or how you helped build Asylum. I mean ... it's almost become a formula for your promos, and that's where it becomes weak. Not weak as in you will lose, but weak enough to not be stand-out memorable. Move on from the past, dwell in the present and the future is my advice here. Where is Kash going? What's in the future? What is he felling now, not what did he feel a year ago?
2. Technicalities. Punctuation and grammar are the best way to developing a strong voice in the promo. Otherwise ... it lacks the 'speaking to the reader' voice. While you might hear Kash in your head, rarely will a reader instantly click. Everyone speaks in a distinct and unique way, be it sentence structure or the way they end and start sentences, where they pause. There should be a distinct voice. I get that with a lot of people in APW (Noble is one. Lester is another. use them for models) but I never really got that from yours. I get the emotion, but I don't get the voice.
3. Slabs of trash talk. Yeah, I think I'm guilty of it too when I don't have a super-exciting idea to run with. I just start up a common setting/plot and fill in the significant details with slabs of trash talk. If you're going to be using other characters in your promo, you can have as much trash talk, just broken down, taking the essence out of what you want to say (which makes it much more powerful and insightful) and then say it with a new, more interesting setting. And then you will also have some words to develop the actions or the narrator's thoughts/ideas that you only pay cursory attention to at the moment.
Summary
Overall, you're still putting out the quality of promo that got you to the top. But, as with everything, change brings about challenges. With all these new and interesting characters coming in, the 'regulars' (like us) have to step up to keep that 'freshness' that we once had. You're promos are strong, and you will always have a grounding to fall back onto (the foundation never crumbles, just what we build around it), but you should now be pushing Kash into areas that are unfamiliar to you. If it's a fresh idea to you then it's bound to be a fresh idea to us all. That way, in no time, you'll be back on top.
