Post by Twister on Jun 16, 2008 0:09:49 GMT -4
Our scene opens up and a well lit dressing room. Rather undecorated walls, but some damn plush furniture aligning the room. Details you say? Who cares what am I painting you a fucking picture or getting to the point? A camera comes in through the room and finally views Twister sitting on the couch. He wears a dark pair of jeans, and a jersey with the sleeves cut off it.
Welcome Gentlemen.
The camera drops back and shows Phil making his way towards the chair beside the couch.
Twister, its been a long time since we've seen you in a wrestling ring... Before we get to anything else, the people need to know, why are you here?
Ah Phil... It has been a long time... Three years give or take, since I stepped foot into a ring. I've gone through my time... Had a beautiful baby with a back stabbing whore, got my life back on track... But I always felt like there was something missing. The other night I was watching Family Guy with my son, and my phone went off... I answered and it was President Jeff... He needed a favor.
Jeff needed a favor from you?
You got it Phillip... You see there was this wedding, perhaps you heard of it, Kenny Lambardo and Diana Steel... He couldn't get into specifics with me, but he needed someone who he figured he could count on... Someone to run interference.
You mean Jeff wanted the wedding crashed?
No no no no... You think he'd blow that kinda money for nothing... Dude he's Canadian too... He's a cheap ass... No... more over he needed someone to make sure a certain secret didn't get revealed.
You know the secret?
Shit son, I don't know, and to be frank, I don't care. You know what I saw Phil, I saw opportunity. I saw a powerful man who needed a favor... You know what happens when powerful men need favors?
What?
They give Powerful favors back... Which brings us to this week...
So Jeff asked you to come and interfere with the wedding, and in turn granted you a World Title Shot?
Your a touch off... See this all could have been prevented had Trevor been able to finish... Course side from one instance... thats always been a problem of his... Isn't that right Diana. No you see, Jeff said to me, at all costs, make sure the secret is not revealed. If Trevor could have just beat Kenny, he would have never threatened to reveal the secret and everyone would have been happy and it would have been a fairy tale wedding.
But when Trevor came out to reveal the secret...
I did what Jeff asked me to do. Hey - they got to say I do... They did their part... don't come bitching at me like I did something wrong here... I did what I had to do Phil... I mean lets face it... me and Kenny, we've never exactly seen eye to eye on things... So for Jeff to ask me to come and crash his party if Trevor came out... Not a real hard ship for me.
Well indeed crash the party you did... So you did your part for Jeff, but why now are you choosing to make the return to the ring?
What the hell else was I gonna ask him for in return? Money? I don't need his money? But I did need something... I needed the competition Phil... I needed that shot of adrenaline that you can only get when you come bursting out from behind that curtain and hear the millions of fans through out North America screaming your name. It was in my blood man, my opportunity called, and I jumped at it.
Indeed it is a thrill... Well... Either way, here you are now, the APW... Having not wrestled in 3 years, and your first test in the ring is a World Heavyweight Championship match against...
KENNEDY!!!!!!!
Phil looks at Twister confused as hell as Twister lowers his head to normal again.
What?
You know as well as anyone his name is Kenny.
Yeah I know but that wouldn't have been nearly as funny.
Well I suppose you got me there... Anyways, this Monday on Overdrive... Twister vs Sgt Kenny Lambardo Esq.
Great so he solicits watches on the side, I'm so proud of him... I swear to god, every time I see that guy he's got a longer name, but I don't care what the hell you call him how ever you slice it, what ever extensions you give him... He's still Kenny Lambardo...
And quite a history you guys have.
Indeed we do... Kenny and I go back almost as long as me and your mom go... But never have the stakes been so high. The APW World Championship up for grabs... Phil, do you realize how much it will say when in my very first night on the job I come out and take the most coveted prize in the business. I can undo 6 months of hard work between Kenny and Jeff to run this company, all in one night.
You said this was done because it was what you wanted... But if you wanted a title match why not wait and do it on a bigger stage.
I thought about it Phil... I thought about taking Kenny at Test for the Best... Maybe wait til Shockwave, or Snowslam, or Rasslemania, or any other grand stage... but you know why I didnt...
Why?
Its been done. He'll we've all done the Pay Per View title matches... We all get up for the Pay Per View matches... Its been done Phil... But what can I gain by taking the match at Overdrive? the element of surprise. The knowledge that Kenny may not be on top of his game cause maybe he's looking ahead to the Pay Per View... This is a tough business Phil... You have to take any opportunity you can, and you have to make the most of any advantage you can.
Many speculate though Twist that you may be a bit rusty coming off such a long lay off... Any thought on that.
What can I say Phil... Of course their going to talk... they need to somehow convince themselves that I'm not every bit as great as I say I am. They need to try to believe that I'm not the living legend. They need to trick themselves into believing that I'm not going to be 100% so that they can believe that they have some hope of beating me.
And to them you say?
Kenny... King of the Cocks...
Actually thats CoKs Twist...
What ever either way Spirit still has a bigger one than the rest of em put together... Kenny... you can believe what ever you feel you need to get you through the night. Do yourself a favor... Monday morning... Roll over... wipe yourself off... Remember the sex you had last night... Hell maybe do it again... Diana's hot... why not get it when you can. Then get out of your bed and take a good long look at the APW championship... Look at it Kenny... For Monday night... it will be gone. No more title, no more glory, no more peons believing that your some kind of god for come Monday night, they will see just how mortal you are as your laying on your back... counting the skylights... No Kenny its not Diana on top of you this time... but it will last just as long... For in three short memorable seconds there will be a new APW champion and you will have feared Twister's Rage.
Twister smirks at the camera and lays back as the camera fades out.
Welcome Gentlemen.
The camera drops back and shows Phil making his way towards the chair beside the couch.
Twister, its been a long time since we've seen you in a wrestling ring... Before we get to anything else, the people need to know, why are you here?
Ah Phil... It has been a long time... Three years give or take, since I stepped foot into a ring. I've gone through my time... Had a beautiful baby with a back stabbing whore, got my life back on track... But I always felt like there was something missing. The other night I was watching Family Guy with my son, and my phone went off... I answered and it was President Jeff... He needed a favor.
Jeff needed a favor from you?
You got it Phillip... You see there was this wedding, perhaps you heard of it, Kenny Lambardo and Diana Steel... He couldn't get into specifics with me, but he needed someone who he figured he could count on... Someone to run interference.
You mean Jeff wanted the wedding crashed?
No no no no... You think he'd blow that kinda money for nothing... Dude he's Canadian too... He's a cheap ass... No... more over he needed someone to make sure a certain secret didn't get revealed.
You know the secret?
Shit son, I don't know, and to be frank, I don't care. You know what I saw Phil, I saw opportunity. I saw a powerful man who needed a favor... You know what happens when powerful men need favors?
What?
They give Powerful favors back... Which brings us to this week...
So Jeff asked you to come and interfere with the wedding, and in turn granted you a World Title Shot?
Your a touch off... See this all could have been prevented had Trevor been able to finish... Course side from one instance... thats always been a problem of his... Isn't that right Diana. No you see, Jeff said to me, at all costs, make sure the secret is not revealed. If Trevor could have just beat Kenny, he would have never threatened to reveal the secret and everyone would have been happy and it would have been a fairy tale wedding.
But when Trevor came out to reveal the secret...
I did what Jeff asked me to do. Hey - they got to say I do... They did their part... don't come bitching at me like I did something wrong here... I did what I had to do Phil... I mean lets face it... me and Kenny, we've never exactly seen eye to eye on things... So for Jeff to ask me to come and crash his party if Trevor came out... Not a real hard ship for me.
Well indeed crash the party you did... So you did your part for Jeff, but why now are you choosing to make the return to the ring?
What the hell else was I gonna ask him for in return? Money? I don't need his money? But I did need something... I needed the competition Phil... I needed that shot of adrenaline that you can only get when you come bursting out from behind that curtain and hear the millions of fans through out North America screaming your name. It was in my blood man, my opportunity called, and I jumped at it.
Indeed it is a thrill... Well... Either way, here you are now, the APW... Having not wrestled in 3 years, and your first test in the ring is a World Heavyweight Championship match against...
KENNEDY!!!!!!!
Phil looks at Twister confused as hell as Twister lowers his head to normal again.
What?
You know as well as anyone his name is Kenny.
Yeah I know but that wouldn't have been nearly as funny.
Well I suppose you got me there... Anyways, this Monday on Overdrive... Twister vs Sgt Kenny Lambardo Esq.
Great so he solicits watches on the side, I'm so proud of him... I swear to god, every time I see that guy he's got a longer name, but I don't care what the hell you call him how ever you slice it, what ever extensions you give him... He's still Kenny Lambardo...
And quite a history you guys have.
Indeed we do... Kenny and I go back almost as long as me and your mom go... But never have the stakes been so high. The APW World Championship up for grabs... Phil, do you realize how much it will say when in my very first night on the job I come out and take the most coveted prize in the business. I can undo 6 months of hard work between Kenny and Jeff to run this company, all in one night.
You said this was done because it was what you wanted... But if you wanted a title match why not wait and do it on a bigger stage.
I thought about it Phil... I thought about taking Kenny at Test for the Best... Maybe wait til Shockwave, or Snowslam, or Rasslemania, or any other grand stage... but you know why I didnt...
Why?
Its been done. He'll we've all done the Pay Per View title matches... We all get up for the Pay Per View matches... Its been done Phil... But what can I gain by taking the match at Overdrive? the element of surprise. The knowledge that Kenny may not be on top of his game cause maybe he's looking ahead to the Pay Per View... This is a tough business Phil... You have to take any opportunity you can, and you have to make the most of any advantage you can.
Many speculate though Twist that you may be a bit rusty coming off such a long lay off... Any thought on that.
What can I say Phil... Of course their going to talk... they need to somehow convince themselves that I'm not every bit as great as I say I am. They need to try to believe that I'm not the living legend. They need to trick themselves into believing that I'm not going to be 100% so that they can believe that they have some hope of beating me.
And to them you say?
Kenny... King of the Cocks...
Actually thats CoKs Twist...
What ever either way Spirit still has a bigger one than the rest of em put together... Kenny... you can believe what ever you feel you need to get you through the night. Do yourself a favor... Monday morning... Roll over... wipe yourself off... Remember the sex you had last night... Hell maybe do it again... Diana's hot... why not get it when you can. Then get out of your bed and take a good long look at the APW championship... Look at it Kenny... For Monday night... it will be gone. No more title, no more glory, no more peons believing that your some kind of god for come Monday night, they will see just how mortal you are as your laying on your back... counting the skylights... No Kenny its not Diana on top of you this time... but it will last just as long... For in three short memorable seconds there will be a new APW champion and you will have feared Twister's Rage.
Twister smirks at the camera and lays back as the camera fades out.
