Post by Twister on Jul 13, 2008 23:41:09 GMT -4
[shadow=red,left,300]And so it was written, on the 8th day of the 7th month of this 8th year of the new millenia a revelation... No not the second coming of christ... or as this place would have it third right behing Michael lively... But truly a child was born none the less... A bastard child... Born in love? Hardly... A moment of lust... Was it even a moment? Another oops in the Lambardo/Steel saga... No longer a superhero as a uncle... Yet a nutcase as a father... Well ya win some, ya lose some for everything else theres mastercard![/shadow]
Our camera opens up on a small bar deep in the heart of Denver... The camera pans the room, a pool table hidden in the corner of the room, decent sized projection screen on the wall a number of feet away... a small black dance floor like area in front of it which connects with several tables that then lead to the bar. Various nugget, broncos and avalanche team pictures decorate the walls. A stanley cup photo takes center stage on the wall celebrating the 01 win of the stanley cup by those same beloved Avalanche. A picture of the hero-of-the-minute Alex Tanguay with his arms raised celebrating the game winning goal over a fallen Martin Brodeur. The camera pans back and shows a much greater hero sitting at the bar... A man who's won more championships than the entire state of Colorado never mind just Denver... The man the myth the legend... The unstoppable force, the immovable object, the greatest natural disaster on two legs, the one they call Twister. He sits perched on a bar stool... a small glass and abottle of Jack Daniels Tennesy Whiskey sit in front of him. He is wearing an all new Fear Twister's Rage t-shirt which sports said man standing cross armed amidst a background that appears to be some sort of cage... He also adorns a pair of black jean shorts, and finally we see the man with his trademark sunglasses. He pours some of the sweet JD into the small glass and pounds it back before the blonde hourglass-esk bar tender comes into view and speaks to him.
Those boys with you hun?
Twister peers up from the JD then glances over his shoulder and sees not only the camera crew that just so happened to be frequenting this establishment as well, but also everyones favorite reporter Phil, and, last weeks star of the hour, the wild card Austin Daniels. Twister nods them over to the bar... Ace grabbing a stool a few feet away from Twister and Phil motioning for the cameras to come in a bit. Twist knocks on the counter and addresses the bartender.
A bud for the kid keep.
The bombshell flips her hair back and turns towards the wall bending over into the fridge. The camera shows Phil and Ace both trying to pick their jaws off the ground before the bartender turns around again. Twist looks at the two and a smirk creeps out behind the masked eyes. The bartender spins around and plants a chilled bottle of Budwiser in front of Austin as Twister pours another shot into his glass.
Glad ya could make it... Ace... I know running your own reality show must really take a burden on a man.
Hey, a guys gotta do what a guys gotta do.
Guys if I may interrupt...
The camera pans back a bit to fully grasp the image of Ace and Twister... Well we assume Twister for all we know he could be sleeping... glaring at Phil.
Sorry, but the fans are going to want to know what brings the "Ace" Austin Daniels and Twister together to this type of place.
This type of place is called a bar Phil.
Yeah its where people go to kick back, have a few drinks, get away from some of the drama that our day to day lives throw our way.
Hey at least I dont have a 3 year old kid that I didnt even know about.
Yeah you just have a two year old oops eh Twist.
Yeah but atleast I knew that one was coming... Kenny probably didnt even know he was having sex.
Neither did Diana... OH!
The pair share a laugh and Twist pounds back his shot and begins fixing another one as Ace takes a sip from his beer. Phil tries to remain professional... but lets face it a zing is a zing.
um... Anyways guys... First of all let me just say nice win to both of you last week versus Victor Brander and Kenny Lambardo.
The pair barely acknowledge that Phil spoke yet the conversation does turn to return answers to what he said.
Yeah it was a win Phil... The Ace went wild and put Brander down for the three count... A tainted win though if you ask me.
You still bitter that Kenny pulled bitch and ran away mid match.
Well yeah, shit man I shoulda had my 3 count over Kenny... That was my chance.
Hey in the record books it still shows up Austin Daniels and Twister defeated Kenny Lambardo and Victor Brander... No ones gonna care how man.
I guess but...
Twist shakes his head and hits another shot of Jack and Ace polishes off his beer. Twister nods at the barkeep and she turns around again beinding into the fridge.
Damn...
Something wrong kid?
Ace shakes his head and returns his focus to Twister as the bartender produces another Bud on the bar. Ace takes a sip then continues.
No... not at all. Ah well... I'll redeem myself this week.
Yeah a huge opportunity for ya Austin... Xtreme Championship. Just do me a favor and spruce it up a bit when ya win it k?
Only if you do me a favor...
Whats that Ace?
Dont get lost in Phates skirt in your match. I hear its a dark, scary place.
Twister cocks his head slightly then shakes his head and turns his attention towards the rapidly depleting bottle of JD. He pours another shot into the glass.
Weird guy that Phate... he is a guy right?
Yeah Twist.
Weird guy... but I guess we all have our quirks...
Twist could we get your thoughts on your match against Doctor Phate this week?
Twist drinks the pre poured drink and places the glass down on the counter rather abrasively. He looks up his arms out strecthed.
What the hell is this an interview or something?
Seems like man...
Well its just while we're here and on the subject...
WE? No one invited you, your like that little stray kitten on the street no one really wants it but you walk away and that fishy aroma catches its nose and its gonna follow you everywhere you go.
I just...
Well shut up and listen... So this week... finally President Jeff decides to place me in a match against someone other than the CoK swallower Kenny Lambardo. Doctor Phate... Test for the Best Champion. Number one contender for the World Heavyweight Champion... The man who at Apocalypse will face Matt freakin Metal. The man who looks better in a skirt than Spirit...
W'oh dude...
What, shit aint no way shes a woman either!
Touche.
The man who despite everything I am is self proclaimed something I am not, and that is an Icon... (what its true - read up top did I ever call myself an Icon) The apple dumpling of that ukranian buffet... The man who epitomizes the exclaimation point in APW!
Theres no exclaimation point in APW.
Sure there is... I saw it.
You saw it?
Yes.
O...k...
The twisted school girl himself... That doesnt sound right...
What?
School girl followed by him... Doesnt sit right.
Neither does Diana after a evening with Kenny... OH!
You gotta stop doing that. May I continue?
Sorry... Please.
Ace takes a sip of his beer as Twister continues.
The Icon Doctor Phate. The man who puts more effort into looking like a girl than Michael Jackson does into looking white.
OH!
Twister looks at Ace who slumps back and sips his beer. Id say he glared... he probably did... But dude he wears his sunglasses at night... I dont know what the fuck he's doin so why should you. Twister pours himself a shot and pounds it back before continuing.
This Monday night, Im going to give you the opportunity to finally prove you mean something Phate. You wanna be an icon... You wanna be the best... You want to be APW champion... Prove ya got the stuff man. Test for the best, you proved you can be on top of your game, be opportunistic when the time comes... Lets be real though, you wouldn't have even beat Ace here if he'd have had time to prepare for you. This week, you finally get to come off your high. You finally step back into the ring after having your hand raised as number one contender and you run into a road block. Your on such a roll lately hmmm... You think you got it all figured out... You think you look good in panty hose for what-the-fuck-are-those-damn-bombers1-thinking sake.
What?
Nevermind.
Ace takes another sip from his beer, as Twister continues.
But I think the thing that gets me the most Phate is you seem lately to have a certain thing against legends.
Twister pulls off his sunglasses and places them on the bar beside his shot glass and JD bottle then returns his eyes to the camera. His eyes are a bit bloodshot, but deadly focused. The camera zooms in a bit.
I heard the way you talked to Metal... The way you've been running your mouth lately... Legends die... Icons live forever... isnt that your little slogan. Phate... you can live as long as you want... You can prance around in that stupid skirt and listen to crappy music all day long. You can pretend like Im just some obstacle you HAVE to beat down.
Twister turns his attention to the bar and pours himself another shot then returns to the camera.
You talk about all the momentum you have coming into this match, and how your not Kenny Lambardo... Your right sunshine, your not... You dont have a belt on your jock telling the world your the best in the business... You just have a contract saying you have a chance to try. Where as I have been there, done that, and I have two victories in two weeks over that very same champion that you are not. Two victories over the best... Meaning your... Your just one of the rest. Its nothing personal buttercup... I dont care that your in a skirt... Shit I've been wrestling cross dressers forever. I took them down too, ask Spirit, as Diana... But you did get one thing right Phate... None of that matters...
As Twister is talking Ace puts his beer down and grabs Twisters glasses off the table. He places them over his eyes and sits back in his chair.
That means me beating Kenny doesnt mean anything... That means Me and Ace winning last week doesnt mean anything... That means you winning test for the best doesnt mean anything... That means that compromising position that you got caught in on YouTube last night doesnt mean anything and Ace give me back my glasses.
Ace pouts and hands Twister his glasses. Twister returns them to his face once more hiding his expressions.
The only thing that will matter Phate is Monday night, The icon vs the Legend, the School Girl vs the Man, Doctor Phate versus Twister, in a match that can, should, and fuck-Glenn2-not-again WILL steal... the... show. Two of the best the APW have to offer one on one in the middle of that ring. My... Ring. Monday night Phate, Im going to put you in another compromising position... On your back for a 1... 2... 3. As the wind blows past your face and your face breaks on the mat you will have feared... Twisters... Rage.
A smirk creeps across Twisters face.
Toodles... Bitch.
Twister spins around and faces the bar again as Ace does the same thing. The bartender produces another Budwiser almost on cue as Ace finishes the prior one. Twister downs his shot and pours another one as the camera pans out more.
Well... Here's to two more Monday night wins man!
Ace holds his beer up towards Twister. Twister picks up the shot glass and clinks it against the bottle and then they drink.
Hey what happened to your Tropicana...
Dude... thats only on commercials.. And maybe when I gotta work. Heh.
Full of surprises Twist.
Um Guys?
With out even turning Twister addresses Phil.
You can go now Phil.
But I...
You heard the man.
But guys!
Hey hun... is this boy givin you a hard time?
Yeah you mind takin care of him for us?
With pleasure.
Twister and Ace turn their attention to follow the bartender come around the bar and walk seductively towards Phil.
Im afraid Ima have to ask you to leave hun...
But...
Have it your way. HOOYAH!
Twister and Ace look on in disbelief as the woman heaves Phil into a firemans carry and literally carries him out of the bar... the Camera crew follow closely behind.
Damn she's hot...
I know.
The men return to their drinks as the camera fades to black.
For those who dont know the 1Bombers are the pro football team in Winnipeg, mine and convienently enough Twisters home town who are choking worse than Bush on a pretzel OH! and Glenn2 refers to Kevin Glenn their starting QB. Thank you for your time
Our camera opens up on a small bar deep in the heart of Denver... The camera pans the room, a pool table hidden in the corner of the room, decent sized projection screen on the wall a number of feet away... a small black dance floor like area in front of it which connects with several tables that then lead to the bar. Various nugget, broncos and avalanche team pictures decorate the walls. A stanley cup photo takes center stage on the wall celebrating the 01 win of the stanley cup by those same beloved Avalanche. A picture of the hero-of-the-minute Alex Tanguay with his arms raised celebrating the game winning goal over a fallen Martin Brodeur. The camera pans back and shows a much greater hero sitting at the bar... A man who's won more championships than the entire state of Colorado never mind just Denver... The man the myth the legend... The unstoppable force, the immovable object, the greatest natural disaster on two legs, the one they call Twister. He sits perched on a bar stool... a small glass and abottle of Jack Daniels Tennesy Whiskey sit in front of him. He is wearing an all new Fear Twister's Rage t-shirt which sports said man standing cross armed amidst a background that appears to be some sort of cage... He also adorns a pair of black jean shorts, and finally we see the man with his trademark sunglasses. He pours some of the sweet JD into the small glass and pounds it back before the blonde hourglass-esk bar tender comes into view and speaks to him.
Those boys with you hun?
Twister peers up from the JD then glances over his shoulder and sees not only the camera crew that just so happened to be frequenting this establishment as well, but also everyones favorite reporter Phil, and, last weeks star of the hour, the wild card Austin Daniels. Twister nods them over to the bar... Ace grabbing a stool a few feet away from Twister and Phil motioning for the cameras to come in a bit. Twist knocks on the counter and addresses the bartender.
A bud for the kid keep.
The bombshell flips her hair back and turns towards the wall bending over into the fridge. The camera shows Phil and Ace both trying to pick their jaws off the ground before the bartender turns around again. Twist looks at the two and a smirk creeps out behind the masked eyes. The bartender spins around and plants a chilled bottle of Budwiser in front of Austin as Twister pours another shot into his glass.
Glad ya could make it... Ace... I know running your own reality show must really take a burden on a man.
Hey, a guys gotta do what a guys gotta do.
Guys if I may interrupt...
The camera pans back a bit to fully grasp the image of Ace and Twister... Well we assume Twister for all we know he could be sleeping... glaring at Phil.
Sorry, but the fans are going to want to know what brings the "Ace" Austin Daniels and Twister together to this type of place.
This type of place is called a bar Phil.
Yeah its where people go to kick back, have a few drinks, get away from some of the drama that our day to day lives throw our way.
Hey at least I dont have a 3 year old kid that I didnt even know about.
Yeah you just have a two year old oops eh Twist.
Yeah but atleast I knew that one was coming... Kenny probably didnt even know he was having sex.
Neither did Diana... OH!
The pair share a laugh and Twist pounds back his shot and begins fixing another one as Ace takes a sip from his beer. Phil tries to remain professional... but lets face it a zing is a zing.
um... Anyways guys... First of all let me just say nice win to both of you last week versus Victor Brander and Kenny Lambardo.
The pair barely acknowledge that Phil spoke yet the conversation does turn to return answers to what he said.
Yeah it was a win Phil... The Ace went wild and put Brander down for the three count... A tainted win though if you ask me.
You still bitter that Kenny pulled bitch and ran away mid match.
Well yeah, shit man I shoulda had my 3 count over Kenny... That was my chance.
Hey in the record books it still shows up Austin Daniels and Twister defeated Kenny Lambardo and Victor Brander... No ones gonna care how man.
I guess but...
Twist shakes his head and hits another shot of Jack and Ace polishes off his beer. Twister nods at the barkeep and she turns around again beinding into the fridge.
Damn...
Something wrong kid?
Ace shakes his head and returns his focus to Twister as the bartender produces another Bud on the bar. Ace takes a sip then continues.
No... not at all. Ah well... I'll redeem myself this week.
Yeah a huge opportunity for ya Austin... Xtreme Championship. Just do me a favor and spruce it up a bit when ya win it k?
Only if you do me a favor...
Whats that Ace?
Dont get lost in Phates skirt in your match. I hear its a dark, scary place.
Twister cocks his head slightly then shakes his head and turns his attention towards the rapidly depleting bottle of JD. He pours another shot into the glass.
Weird guy that Phate... he is a guy right?
Yeah Twist.
Weird guy... but I guess we all have our quirks...
Twist could we get your thoughts on your match against Doctor Phate this week?
Twist drinks the pre poured drink and places the glass down on the counter rather abrasively. He looks up his arms out strecthed.
What the hell is this an interview or something?
Seems like man...
Well its just while we're here and on the subject...
WE? No one invited you, your like that little stray kitten on the street no one really wants it but you walk away and that fishy aroma catches its nose and its gonna follow you everywhere you go.
I just...
Well shut up and listen... So this week... finally President Jeff decides to place me in a match against someone other than the CoK swallower Kenny Lambardo. Doctor Phate... Test for the Best Champion. Number one contender for the World Heavyweight Champion... The man who at Apocalypse will face Matt freakin Metal. The man who looks better in a skirt than Spirit...
W'oh dude...
What, shit aint no way shes a woman either!
Touche.
The man who despite everything I am is self proclaimed something I am not, and that is an Icon... (what its true - read up top did I ever call myself an Icon) The apple dumpling of that ukranian buffet... The man who epitomizes the exclaimation point in APW!
Theres no exclaimation point in APW.
Sure there is... I saw it.
You saw it?
Yes.
O...k...
The twisted school girl himself... That doesnt sound right...
What?
School girl followed by him... Doesnt sit right.
Neither does Diana after a evening with Kenny... OH!
You gotta stop doing that. May I continue?
Sorry... Please.
Ace takes a sip of his beer as Twister continues.
The Icon Doctor Phate. The man who puts more effort into looking like a girl than Michael Jackson does into looking white.
OH!
Twister looks at Ace who slumps back and sips his beer. Id say he glared... he probably did... But dude he wears his sunglasses at night... I dont know what the fuck he's doin so why should you. Twister pours himself a shot and pounds it back before continuing.
This Monday night, Im going to give you the opportunity to finally prove you mean something Phate. You wanna be an icon... You wanna be the best... You want to be APW champion... Prove ya got the stuff man. Test for the best, you proved you can be on top of your game, be opportunistic when the time comes... Lets be real though, you wouldn't have even beat Ace here if he'd have had time to prepare for you. This week, you finally get to come off your high. You finally step back into the ring after having your hand raised as number one contender and you run into a road block. Your on such a roll lately hmmm... You think you got it all figured out... You think you look good in panty hose for what-the-fuck-are-those-damn-bombers1-thinking sake.
What?
Nevermind.
Ace takes another sip from his beer, as Twister continues.
But I think the thing that gets me the most Phate is you seem lately to have a certain thing against legends.
Twister pulls off his sunglasses and places them on the bar beside his shot glass and JD bottle then returns his eyes to the camera. His eyes are a bit bloodshot, but deadly focused. The camera zooms in a bit.
I heard the way you talked to Metal... The way you've been running your mouth lately... Legends die... Icons live forever... isnt that your little slogan. Phate... you can live as long as you want... You can prance around in that stupid skirt and listen to crappy music all day long. You can pretend like Im just some obstacle you HAVE to beat down.
Twister turns his attention to the bar and pours himself another shot then returns to the camera.
You talk about all the momentum you have coming into this match, and how your not Kenny Lambardo... Your right sunshine, your not... You dont have a belt on your jock telling the world your the best in the business... You just have a contract saying you have a chance to try. Where as I have been there, done that, and I have two victories in two weeks over that very same champion that you are not. Two victories over the best... Meaning your... Your just one of the rest. Its nothing personal buttercup... I dont care that your in a skirt... Shit I've been wrestling cross dressers forever. I took them down too, ask Spirit, as Diana... But you did get one thing right Phate... None of that matters...
As Twister is talking Ace puts his beer down and grabs Twisters glasses off the table. He places them over his eyes and sits back in his chair.
That means me beating Kenny doesnt mean anything... That means Me and Ace winning last week doesnt mean anything... That means you winning test for the best doesnt mean anything... That means that compromising position that you got caught in on YouTube last night doesnt mean anything and Ace give me back my glasses.
Ace pouts and hands Twister his glasses. Twister returns them to his face once more hiding his expressions.
The only thing that will matter Phate is Monday night, The icon vs the Legend, the School Girl vs the Man, Doctor Phate versus Twister, in a match that can, should, and fuck-Glenn2-not-again WILL steal... the... show. Two of the best the APW have to offer one on one in the middle of that ring. My... Ring. Monday night Phate, Im going to put you in another compromising position... On your back for a 1... 2... 3. As the wind blows past your face and your face breaks on the mat you will have feared... Twisters... Rage.
A smirk creeps across Twisters face.
Toodles... Bitch.
Twister spins around and faces the bar again as Ace does the same thing. The bartender produces another Budwiser almost on cue as Ace finishes the prior one. Twister downs his shot and pours another one as the camera pans out more.
Well... Here's to two more Monday night wins man!
Ace holds his beer up towards Twister. Twister picks up the shot glass and clinks it against the bottle and then they drink.
Hey what happened to your Tropicana...
Dude... thats only on commercials.. And maybe when I gotta work. Heh.
Full of surprises Twist.
Um Guys?
With out even turning Twister addresses Phil.
You can go now Phil.
But I...
You heard the man.
But guys!
Hey hun... is this boy givin you a hard time?
Yeah you mind takin care of him for us?
With pleasure.
Twister and Ace turn their attention to follow the bartender come around the bar and walk seductively towards Phil.
Im afraid Ima have to ask you to leave hun...
But...
Have it your way. HOOYAH!
Twister and Ace look on in disbelief as the woman heaves Phil into a firemans carry and literally carries him out of the bar... the Camera crew follow closely behind.
Damn she's hot...
I know.
The men return to their drinks as the camera fades to black.
For those who dont know the 1Bombers are the pro football team in Winnipeg, mine and convienently enough Twisters home town who are choking worse than Bush on a pretzel OH! and Glenn2 refers to Kevin Glenn their starting QB. Thank you for your time
