Post by Your JESUS on Feb 6, 2008 21:19:17 GMT -4
(The scene opens in the northwest part of the Vegas valley. Just off the U.S. 95 freeway sits a large Ford dealership. A pearl white Chrysler 300 pulls up in front of the dealership and maneuvers it's way into a cramped parking space. The drivers door opens and out steps APW superstar Sabur. The man makes his way to the showroom passing the display of new F-Series trucks showcased in front of the store. The doors of the dealership slide open as Sabur strides onto the sales floor. Salesmen in the middle of swindling people out of their money stop what they are doing and take notice to the celebrity that has just entered the building. People flock to the superstar with pens and paper, seeming to want autographs. Sabur raises his fist in the air as if making his trademark entrance (Copy written by the laws of gimmick infringement), as people flock to him.)
Fan: Oh my god, I can't believe it's you. I've always wanted to meet you, your fight the other day was awesome.....(interupted)
Sabur: So you liked it!!
Fan: It would of been good to see you win though, so could you make this autograph out to my son Johnny Mr. Lesnar???
Sabur: Lesnar.........
(The Irish Hammers face turns bright red, and his arms begin to tremble, and the man explodes with anger)
Sabur: Who the fuck is Lesnar.....I am Sabur the IRISH GOD DAMN HAMMER!!!!!!! The prodigy of the business, future hall of fammer.........
(A salesmen runs over to the big man and excuses his outburst from the customers)
Salesmen: Sabur glad you could make it down, sorry for the problem, these people are crazy.....don't worry about it.
Sabur: Who is this Lesnar, these people speak of??
Salesman: I'm not sure, must be someone who looks like you, anyway lets go outback the Shelby Mustang GT 500 you ordered is here.
Sabur: The black one with the ghost racing stripes....(with excitement in his voice)
Salesman: Yep, the chasing red lights in the cowl, and the custom steering wheel...
Sabur: Does have the supercomputer, turbo boost, and the regeneration capabilities???
Salesman: Well sir I think thats not possible......but
Sabur: NOT POSSIBLE!!!!!!!!!! I saw that shit...., the new fucking Knight Rider has all that shit.... what do you mean!!!
Salesman: Well sir not to be rude, but that is just a TV show, I think it's just pretend.
(Sabur standing there looking puzzled)
Sabur: Pretend...Allright just like Santa, I get it. Lets just take the test drive please, I'm a little disappointed right now.
Salesman: Let me get the keys from my manager, I'll be right back.
(The salesman walks to the sales tower to retrieve the keys. Sabur walks out back and see's his dream car. The man walks over to the car, and runs his his hand down the rear quarter panel ever so gently. He walks to the drivers door and very softly under his breath mutters...)
Sabur: KITT.... it's me....it's me KITT, Michael.....no one is around, it's ok, you can talk.....
KITT:(silence)
Sabur: Buddy are you mad at me?
?, I'm sorry buddy....
(The salesman walks up behind Sabur, and hears the man talking to the car)
Salesman: Are you ok sir???
Sabur: Uhhhhh...., yeah.... got those fucking keys?
Salesman: Here they are!
Sabur: Lets go!!!
(Sabur sits in the custom Shelby racing seat, and shuts the door. The salesman has a seat in the passenger side, and passes Sabur the keys. The big man slides the key into the ignition, and with a twist of the wrist the performance machines engine roars to life. Sabur revs the engine a few times with a smile on his face, and then sits silent starring at the instrument cluster almost willing the car to move with his mind.)
(Inside Sabur's Head): I know you can hear me KITT...you've got the keys buddy, don't worry about this guy, just go.....go like the wind KITT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Salesman: Excuse me Sabur, but the car won't drive itself, I think you need to put into gear.
(Sabur slams down the clutch with his foot as his right fist clenches the gearshift and smashes it forward. His large right foot mashes the gas pedal as the tires smoke on the pavement and begin to grip the rear of the car slides sideways a bit and launches forward. The two men jump onto the freeway for the test drive)
Saleman: So hell of a match the other night, it too bad that they DQ'd you though!
Sabur: Yeah, I'm a simple man that wants to compete, smash heads, possibly take home so gold, and make a boat load of cash along the way. I feal I was leaving it all out there in that ring, and who knows the outcome if that damn Saxton didn't come down to satisfy his need for revenge during my match. Well now I need my revenge, and Marcus is gonna get dropped on his fucking head to satisfy my thirst for revenge.
Salesman: Sounds exciting and I can't wait to see that match this Monday.
(The two men pull back into the lot of the dealership)
Sabur: Yeah, I just can't wait....My record is now 0-1 thanks to a couple of people, who can't seem to settle their issues, I do know I will be prepared for the same sort of thing to take place in this match and I will be damned if I become 0-2 because of some bullshit interference, so Trevor keep your ass in the back when I'm done tossing Saxton's scrawny ass around the ring, I'll bring his lifeless limp body back to your dressing room, and hand deliver the bitch that cost me a possible shot at gold and forced me to accept the losing purse. He fucked with my wallet and now he's gonna pay!!!!!!!!!!!
Salesman: Man......so let me go talk to finance and see what kind of payment we will get you....
(Sabur reaches into his pocket and pulls out a giant folded wad of cash, the peals off a large sum and hands it to the salesman)
Sabur: You take that to the manager, then bring your lilly ass back out here with some temporary plates and my fucking green slip, and I'll be on my way.
Salesman: Uhhh, O.....k.....
Sabur: Get the fuck on, you have me pissed off now, first the fucking car won't talk to me and then you start in with my last match, this is fucking horrible customer service, you move your ass, or I'll drop you head first on the hood of the F-150 over there.
(The man scurry's off promptly, and quickly returns with the paperwork and temp plates)
Salesman: Sir, I'm sorry for the disrespect, we are going to pay your vehicle registration for you and we hope to see you again.
Sabur: Yeah, fucking what ever!!!!!!!
(Sabur slams the door shut and fires the engine of his new toy. The tires begin to spin furiously as the front of the lot fills with smoke the car then leaps forward and drives off)
Sabur: Allright KITT, we are alone you can talk now........
KITT:
Sabur: FUCK, Someone is gonna get hurt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(end scene)
Fan: Oh my god, I can't believe it's you. I've always wanted to meet you, your fight the other day was awesome.....(interupted)
Sabur: So you liked it!!
Fan: It would of been good to see you win though, so could you make this autograph out to my son Johnny Mr. Lesnar???
Sabur: Lesnar.........
(The Irish Hammers face turns bright red, and his arms begin to tremble, and the man explodes with anger)
Sabur: Who the fuck is Lesnar.....I am Sabur the IRISH GOD DAMN HAMMER!!!!!!! The prodigy of the business, future hall of fammer.........
(A salesmen runs over to the big man and excuses his outburst from the customers)
Salesmen: Sabur glad you could make it down, sorry for the problem, these people are crazy.....don't worry about it.
Sabur: Who is this Lesnar, these people speak of??
Salesman: I'm not sure, must be someone who looks like you, anyway lets go outback the Shelby Mustang GT 500 you ordered is here.
Sabur: The black one with the ghost racing stripes....(with excitement in his voice)
Salesman: Yep, the chasing red lights in the cowl, and the custom steering wheel...
Sabur: Does have the supercomputer, turbo boost, and the regeneration capabilities???
Salesman: Well sir I think thats not possible......but
Sabur: NOT POSSIBLE!!!!!!!!!! I saw that shit...., the new fucking Knight Rider has all that shit.... what do you mean!!!
Salesman: Well sir not to be rude, but that is just a TV show, I think it's just pretend.
(Sabur standing there looking puzzled)
Sabur: Pretend...Allright just like Santa, I get it. Lets just take the test drive please, I'm a little disappointed right now.
Salesman: Let me get the keys from my manager, I'll be right back.
(The salesman walks to the sales tower to retrieve the keys. Sabur walks out back and see's his dream car. The man walks over to the car, and runs his his hand down the rear quarter panel ever so gently. He walks to the drivers door and very softly under his breath mutters...)
Sabur: KITT.... it's me....it's me KITT, Michael.....no one is around, it's ok, you can talk.....
KITT:(silence)
Sabur: Buddy are you mad at me?
?, I'm sorry buddy....(The salesman walks up behind Sabur, and hears the man talking to the car)
Salesman: Are you ok sir???
Sabur: Uhhhhh...., yeah.... got those fucking keys?
Salesman: Here they are!
Sabur: Lets go!!!
(Sabur sits in the custom Shelby racing seat, and shuts the door. The salesman has a seat in the passenger side, and passes Sabur the keys. The big man slides the key into the ignition, and with a twist of the wrist the performance machines engine roars to life. Sabur revs the engine a few times with a smile on his face, and then sits silent starring at the instrument cluster almost willing the car to move with his mind.)
(Inside Sabur's Head): I know you can hear me KITT...you've got the keys buddy, don't worry about this guy, just go.....go like the wind KITT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Salesman: Excuse me Sabur, but the car won't drive itself, I think you need to put into gear.
(Sabur slams down the clutch with his foot as his right fist clenches the gearshift and smashes it forward. His large right foot mashes the gas pedal as the tires smoke on the pavement and begin to grip the rear of the car slides sideways a bit and launches forward. The two men jump onto the freeway for the test drive)
Saleman: So hell of a match the other night, it too bad that they DQ'd you though!
Sabur: Yeah, I'm a simple man that wants to compete, smash heads, possibly take home so gold, and make a boat load of cash along the way. I feal I was leaving it all out there in that ring, and who knows the outcome if that damn Saxton didn't come down to satisfy his need for revenge during my match. Well now I need my revenge, and Marcus is gonna get dropped on his fucking head to satisfy my thirst for revenge.
Salesman: Sounds exciting and I can't wait to see that match this Monday.
(The two men pull back into the lot of the dealership)
Sabur: Yeah, I just can't wait....My record is now 0-1 thanks to a couple of people, who can't seem to settle their issues, I do know I will be prepared for the same sort of thing to take place in this match and I will be damned if I become 0-2 because of some bullshit interference, so Trevor keep your ass in the back when I'm done tossing Saxton's scrawny ass around the ring, I'll bring his lifeless limp body back to your dressing room, and hand deliver the bitch that cost me a possible shot at gold and forced me to accept the losing purse. He fucked with my wallet and now he's gonna pay!!!!!!!!!!!
Salesman: Man......so let me go talk to finance and see what kind of payment we will get you....
(Sabur reaches into his pocket and pulls out a giant folded wad of cash, the peals off a large sum and hands it to the salesman)
Sabur: You take that to the manager, then bring your lilly ass back out here with some temporary plates and my fucking green slip, and I'll be on my way.
Salesman: Uhhh, O.....k.....
Sabur: Get the fuck on, you have me pissed off now, first the fucking car won't talk to me and then you start in with my last match, this is fucking horrible customer service, you move your ass, or I'll drop you head first on the hood of the F-150 over there.
(The man scurry's off promptly, and quickly returns with the paperwork and temp plates)
Salesman: Sir, I'm sorry for the disrespect, we are going to pay your vehicle registration for you and we hope to see you again.
Sabur: Yeah, fucking what ever!!!!!!!
(Sabur slams the door shut and fires the engine of his new toy. The tires begin to spin furiously as the front of the lot fills with smoke the car then leaps forward and drives off)
Sabur: Allright KITT, we are alone you can talk now........
KITT:
Sabur: FUCK, Someone is gonna get hurt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(end scene)
