Post by biggs on Jun 24, 2009 20:00:19 GMT -4
Biggs enters President Jeff's office.
Biggs: President Jeff, if I may have a moment of your time...
Jeff: No problem, Biggs. What's up?
Biggs: Well, you know how I've been working on building heat with the Mexican crowds, I was wondering if you minded if I took a booking with AAA Mexico to not only further build myself up as the most hated man in Mexico, but to also do some cross promotion for APW. AAA is the number one fed down here.
Jeff: Well, considering that we let other guys wrestle in other feds, I don't see what the problem is. Also, great to see you take initiative in trying to further promote APW. Every arena we've booked down here has been a sellout, but it doesn't hurt to get more PPV buys.
Biggs: Thanks a lot, Pres!
Biggs exits the office as Jeff gets back to his paper work.
****
It's Sunday, June 21st, in Navarrete, Mexico for AAA's show. There's a sellout crowd, and an elaborate stage set up. It is the last match before the main event. “Spaceman,” by The Killers, hits the PA as blue lights flash all over the arena. The crowd boos as Biggs emerges from the back, clad in his blue and white ring jacket and blue shades.
Announcer: Biggs es un Rudo de APW, y él ha venido aquí esta noche demostrar a AAA qué APW está todo alrededor.
Ring Announcer: Primero, de Seattle, Washington, representando el APW, él pesa 98.5 kilograms, Biggs!
The Mexican fans throw cups and bottles at Biggs as he makes his way down the aisle, and he dodges them all. Biggs reaches the ring, hops up onto the apron, and poses arrogantly before entering the ring. He grab the mic from the ring announcer.
Biggs: Voy a decir esto en inglés, porque usted los punkies no es bastante bueno para que hable su lengua. Heck, it'll probably be dubbed over when this match is broadcast anyways!
The boos from the fans are deafening as Biggs has his trademark smirk across his face.
Biggs: Tonight, I have come to Triple A to two things. One is to prepare myself for APW's Test for the Best tournament by facing some of the best competitors Mexico has to offer. Seeing that Triple A is the top promotion down here, it was a no-brainer to ply my craft here. However, based on what I've seen tonight, it seems that the best Mexico has to offer is worse than the worst the United States of America puts out! I know that the lucha libre tradition runs deep through Mexico, but it is an inferior style! It's too one dimensional. Now the people who can actually understand what I'm saying may be asking, “Well, doesn't Biggs use some high flying moves himself?” and while that is true, my in-ring style is a hybrid style, part submission, part technical, and part high flying. Note the “part.” You see, unlike most of the chumps here, I don't let myself be defined by one style of wrestling, I just define myself as out of this world!
The fans are in an uproar as Biggs refuses to speak Spanish.
Announcer: ¡La falta de respeto de Biggs es repugnante!
Biggs: And secondly...
Biggs is interrupted by Mariachi music as a masked wrestler comes out. He is about 5' 10”, has a hairy chest, and is wearing black trunks.
Ring Announcer: Y su opositor, de Tijuana, Mexico, él pesa 80 kilograms, el Extranjero Hermoso!
El Extranjero Hermoso, or The Handsome Stranger, walks up to Biggs and slaps him across the face, drawing loud cheers from the fans! Biggs counters by clocking him with the mic right in the temple, knocking The Handsome Stranger to the mat! Biggs yells to the ref, “¡Suene la campana!”, which means “Ring the bell!” The ref calls for the bell, DING! DING! DING! Biggs quickly covers the Handsome Stranger, 1...2...3! DING! DING! DING! “Spaceman” begins to play as the ref raises Biggs' hand, and the fans are irate. Biggs picks the mic back up and the music fades as he begins to speak again.
Biggs: Is that the best that you've got? I highly doubt it, but then again, I wouldn't be surprised! As I've said before, I am not defined by one style...
Announcer: ¡Un qué tirón! ¡Él no ganó un fósforo, él consiguió el tiro barato!
Before Biggs can continue to speak, Michael Jackson's “Thriller” hits the PA and the crowd goes crazy! La Parka enters the arena with a steel chair in hand to thunderous applause from the crowd! He struts his way down the aisle as Biggs shakes his head in the ring. As La Parka reaches the ring, Biggs continues to speak.
Biggs: So I guess you want a shot too? Bring it!
Biggs drops the mic and charges La Parka, but La Parka ducks his attack, and clobbers Biggs with right across the skull the chair! Biggs falls to the mat and quickly rolls out of the ring. The ref calls for the bell, DING! DING! DING!
Announcer: ¡La Parka contra Biggs ahora!
As Biggs gets to his feet on the outside, La Parka slingshots himself over the ropes to nail Biggs with a Corkscrew Crossbody! As Biggs is out on the floor, La Parka rolls back into the ring, and does the La Parka strut to the delight of the crowd! Biggs pulls himself up, and slides back into the ring before the ref reaches “diez.” La Parka grabs a hold of Biggs and whips him to the ropes, catching him on the rebound with an Armdrag! Biggs pops back up to get another Armdrag from La Parka! On the third time, Biggs blocks the Armdrag, and gives La Parka one of his own! The fans boo as Biggs mercilessly stomps the knee joint of La Parka! Biggs pulls La Parka up, and gives him a Dragon Screw! Biggs then locks on a Grapevine Leg Lock, trying to take the legs out from La Parka. Biggs pulls La Parka back up, who has a slight limp. Biggs gives him another Dragon Screw, and maintains his grip on La Parka's leg, yanking it out, torquing the knee! Biggs keeps his hold on the ankle, and does a front flip, landing by La Parka's head and stretching the leg out! The fans are booing loudly as Biggs motions that the match is almost over! Biggs grabs La Parka's legs up, steps through, and flips La Parka over to lock on the Sharpshooter! Biggs sits deep in the small of La Parka's back, causing much pain for the experienced luchador! La Parka crawls towards the reps, but right as he's a fingertip away from the ropes, Biggs pulls him back to the center of the ring! La Parka valiantly makes his way back towards the ropes again, but again Biggs pulls him out to the middle of the ring. The crowd boos loudly as La Parka has no choice but to tap out! DING! DING! DING!
Ring Announcer: ¡El ganador, Biggs!
“Spaceman” plays over the speakers as Biggs flashes his trademark smirk! Biggs calls for the mic, and grabs it, talking again as the music fades.
Biggs: I didn't even break a sweat! Triple A is a joke, and if you want to see some real wrestling, then I implore you to order APW's Test for the Best, live from Mexico City, on Sunday, July 5th! I promise each and everyone of you that it will be the absolute best wrestling event to ever take place in Mexico, and not just because I'm going to win the whole darn thing! ¡Ahora voy a irme, porque este lugar apesta!
Biggs drops the mic and leaves the ring, getting huge heat from the crowd! “Spaceman” plays over the speakers as Biggs makes his way up the aisle, as the crowd throws garbage in his direction. Biggs exits the arena.
***
“Spacewalker,” by Depeche Mode, plays as First Contact flashes across the screen. Biggs is seated in his chair, clad in a Captain America T-shirt and his blue shades. He begins to speak.
Biggs: Welcome to the second episode of Biggs' First Contact! I am obviously your host, and the internet's favorite wrestler, Biggs! Firstly, I want to thank everyone for making my webshow the most streamed show on the internet this past week! There's a lot to talk about this week, so let's get started! Now this past week, I further solidified myself as Mexico's most hated wrestler by stepping into the AAA ring and berating the fans, and beating their little golden boy, La Parka, not to mention The Handsome Stranger! I beat two men in one night, and while most of you fans won't get a chance to watch it, let me assure you that I represented APW with a dignity and class that no one else in the APW is capable of!
Biggs pauses to adjust his shades.
Biggs: And speaking of winning matches, I got my second APW victory this week by pinning Assassin in the middle of the ring, though to be completely honest, it felt like he didn't even show up for the match. I know that if he shows up with the same lack of intensity in his Extreme Title match with my good friend Chris Cyrus at Test for the Best, well, let's just say good ol' Cyrus will keep a hold of his belt. That brings me to my next point, that being my match this week with none other than Streets Wilson. Now not only do I get the opportunity to defeat him this week, but Streets is also one of the competitors entered in the Test for the Best tournament, so this week's match may actually be a preview of things to come on July 5th. I'll be honest when I say that I respect Streets Wilson for all the adversity he's had to overcome in his life. I mean, not everyone who is a complete moron has the ability to make it down the ramp each and every week, getting his tail handed to him and keep on coming back for more! What, did you think I was talking about the fact that he grew up on the cold, mean streets of Stamford, Connecticut? Please, I've been to Stamford, and it's so high class, that even the bums are eating caviar! So Streets, yeah it sucks that your parents got iced in front of you while you were a young man, I'm not denying that. No child should ever have to go through that. But if you're going to try and make me believe that your upbringing caused you to be all hard and tough, well, tough luck, because I ain't buying it! Face it Streets, you're like Batman, but without the costume, gadgets, or fighting prowess, or any of the coolness for that matter, but you see, unlike Batman, you aren't using your tragedy to help others, merely to help yourself. And let's be honest here, you're not doing that good of a job at that as it is. So Streets, when you step in the ring with me this week, don't think for a moment that I'll show you any sympathy for your sob story, I know that you wouldn't want me to. The fact remains that once we step into that ring, the past doesn't matter one bit, only the here and now! The wrestling ring is the most objective place in the world, because all that matters is your skill versus your opponent's! And Streets, I know that I'm better than you!
A graphic depicting Level-One and Pence Weatherlight shows up in the corner of the screen.
Biggs: But enough about myself, let's move on to the continuing feud between Pence Weatherlight and Level-One for the APW Championship at Test for the Best! Both of these men are not a 100%, yet both picked up victories this past week on Overdrive. While Pence fought Mr. Strange in a competitive match, Level-One showed his resourcefulness in defeating Nunez! I have to applaud Level-One for the way he took Nunez out, though I still disagree with his stance about giving up the APW Title to Pence because of his ensuing match with Crazyman. Still, whether or not these men will be fully healthy by the pay per view, it doesn't change the fact that they're both in action in a tag team main event. Pence teams up with Shadow to take on Level-One and Mr. Strange, and as much as I dislike Level-One, I do feel sorry for him getting teamed with a confused, worthless individual like Mr. Strange. Still, Pence is teaming with a coward, so neither man really got the best draw in terms of partners. Still, it'll be interesting to see how the match plays out, and who will gain momentum heading into Test for the Best!
The Test for the Best logo appears on the screen.
Biggs: Now I'll talk briefly about the Test for the Best pay per view, sharing my picks for the event! With the match for the Extreme Championship between my good friend Chris Cyrus and Assassin, well, that one's a no brainer! I pick Cyrus to win easily, because let's face it, last week, Assassin pretty much no showed in his match against me, and if he does the same against Cyrus, well, it'll be a short night for Assassin indeed! Now onto the Overdrive Championship match between Shadow and Mr. Strange, even though he's a challenge dodger, I have to give the edge to Shadow. He's beaten Mr. Strange before, and he'll most certainly do it again! As for the Test for the Best tournament, well, who else is there to pick besides your's truly! I have been on a bigger roll than any of my opponents in the tournament, and no matter who I face in at the pay per view, I can assure them that they'll find out first hand why I'm out of this world! Finally, we come to the main event, Pence defending the APW Title against Level-One! Considering the fact that Level-One had to make excuses for his loss to Pence at Mayhem, I have no choice but to pick Pence Weatherlight to successfully retain the APW Heavyweight Championship! That being said, I would much rather face Level-One than Pence, because if Level-One laid down for Pence like he claims he did, well, why wouldn't he do the same for a far better wrestler like me? Not that I'd want you to, but I'm not above taking advantage of opportunities when they present themselves.
The Biggs' Shameless Plug of the Week logo flashes across the bottom of the screen.
Biggs: Unfortunately, time is nearly come to a close, so I'm going to finish up with my Shameless Plug of the Week! This week, I highly recommend that everybody goes out and read The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy! I know that there's no real timely reason for the this recommendation, but if you like science fiction and comedy, this book mixes the two expertly, and it's a quick, snappy read to boot! Well, unfortunately, that's all the time I have for this week. Until next week, keep watching the skies!
The screen fades to black as the APW logo flashes across the screen.
Biggs: President Jeff, if I may have a moment of your time...
Jeff: No problem, Biggs. What's up?
Biggs: Well, you know how I've been working on building heat with the Mexican crowds, I was wondering if you minded if I took a booking with AAA Mexico to not only further build myself up as the most hated man in Mexico, but to also do some cross promotion for APW. AAA is the number one fed down here.
Jeff: Well, considering that we let other guys wrestle in other feds, I don't see what the problem is. Also, great to see you take initiative in trying to further promote APW. Every arena we've booked down here has been a sellout, but it doesn't hurt to get more PPV buys.
Biggs: Thanks a lot, Pres!
Biggs exits the office as Jeff gets back to his paper work.
****
It's Sunday, June 21st, in Navarrete, Mexico for AAA's show. There's a sellout crowd, and an elaborate stage set up. It is the last match before the main event. “Spaceman,” by The Killers, hits the PA as blue lights flash all over the arena. The crowd boos as Biggs emerges from the back, clad in his blue and white ring jacket and blue shades.
Announcer: Biggs es un Rudo de APW, y él ha venido aquí esta noche demostrar a AAA qué APW está todo alrededor.
Ring Announcer: Primero, de Seattle, Washington, representando el APW, él pesa 98.5 kilograms, Biggs!
The Mexican fans throw cups and bottles at Biggs as he makes his way down the aisle, and he dodges them all. Biggs reaches the ring, hops up onto the apron, and poses arrogantly before entering the ring. He grab the mic from the ring announcer.
Biggs: Voy a decir esto en inglés, porque usted los punkies no es bastante bueno para que hable su lengua. Heck, it'll probably be dubbed over when this match is broadcast anyways!
The boos from the fans are deafening as Biggs has his trademark smirk across his face.
Biggs: Tonight, I have come to Triple A to two things. One is to prepare myself for APW's Test for the Best tournament by facing some of the best competitors Mexico has to offer. Seeing that Triple A is the top promotion down here, it was a no-brainer to ply my craft here. However, based on what I've seen tonight, it seems that the best Mexico has to offer is worse than the worst the United States of America puts out! I know that the lucha libre tradition runs deep through Mexico, but it is an inferior style! It's too one dimensional. Now the people who can actually understand what I'm saying may be asking, “Well, doesn't Biggs use some high flying moves himself?” and while that is true, my in-ring style is a hybrid style, part submission, part technical, and part high flying. Note the “part.” You see, unlike most of the chumps here, I don't let myself be defined by one style of wrestling, I just define myself as out of this world!
The fans are in an uproar as Biggs refuses to speak Spanish.
Announcer: ¡La falta de respeto de Biggs es repugnante!
Biggs: And secondly...
Biggs is interrupted by Mariachi music as a masked wrestler comes out. He is about 5' 10”, has a hairy chest, and is wearing black trunks.
Ring Announcer: Y su opositor, de Tijuana, Mexico, él pesa 80 kilograms, el Extranjero Hermoso!
El Extranjero Hermoso, or The Handsome Stranger, walks up to Biggs and slaps him across the face, drawing loud cheers from the fans! Biggs counters by clocking him with the mic right in the temple, knocking The Handsome Stranger to the mat! Biggs yells to the ref, “¡Suene la campana!”, which means “Ring the bell!” The ref calls for the bell, DING! DING! DING! Biggs quickly covers the Handsome Stranger, 1...2...3! DING! DING! DING! “Spaceman” begins to play as the ref raises Biggs' hand, and the fans are irate. Biggs picks the mic back up and the music fades as he begins to speak again.
Biggs: Is that the best that you've got? I highly doubt it, but then again, I wouldn't be surprised! As I've said before, I am not defined by one style...
Announcer: ¡Un qué tirón! ¡Él no ganó un fósforo, él consiguió el tiro barato!
Before Biggs can continue to speak, Michael Jackson's “Thriller” hits the PA and the crowd goes crazy! La Parka enters the arena with a steel chair in hand to thunderous applause from the crowd! He struts his way down the aisle as Biggs shakes his head in the ring. As La Parka reaches the ring, Biggs continues to speak.
Biggs: So I guess you want a shot too? Bring it!
Biggs drops the mic and charges La Parka, but La Parka ducks his attack, and clobbers Biggs with right across the skull the chair! Biggs falls to the mat and quickly rolls out of the ring. The ref calls for the bell, DING! DING! DING!
Announcer: ¡La Parka contra Biggs ahora!
As Biggs gets to his feet on the outside, La Parka slingshots himself over the ropes to nail Biggs with a Corkscrew Crossbody! As Biggs is out on the floor, La Parka rolls back into the ring, and does the La Parka strut to the delight of the crowd! Biggs pulls himself up, and slides back into the ring before the ref reaches “diez.” La Parka grabs a hold of Biggs and whips him to the ropes, catching him on the rebound with an Armdrag! Biggs pops back up to get another Armdrag from La Parka! On the third time, Biggs blocks the Armdrag, and gives La Parka one of his own! The fans boo as Biggs mercilessly stomps the knee joint of La Parka! Biggs pulls La Parka up, and gives him a Dragon Screw! Biggs then locks on a Grapevine Leg Lock, trying to take the legs out from La Parka. Biggs pulls La Parka back up, who has a slight limp. Biggs gives him another Dragon Screw, and maintains his grip on La Parka's leg, yanking it out, torquing the knee! Biggs keeps his hold on the ankle, and does a front flip, landing by La Parka's head and stretching the leg out! The fans are booing loudly as Biggs motions that the match is almost over! Biggs grabs La Parka's legs up, steps through, and flips La Parka over to lock on the Sharpshooter! Biggs sits deep in the small of La Parka's back, causing much pain for the experienced luchador! La Parka crawls towards the reps, but right as he's a fingertip away from the ropes, Biggs pulls him back to the center of the ring! La Parka valiantly makes his way back towards the ropes again, but again Biggs pulls him out to the middle of the ring. The crowd boos loudly as La Parka has no choice but to tap out! DING! DING! DING!
Ring Announcer: ¡El ganador, Biggs!
“Spaceman” plays over the speakers as Biggs flashes his trademark smirk! Biggs calls for the mic, and grabs it, talking again as the music fades.
Biggs: I didn't even break a sweat! Triple A is a joke, and if you want to see some real wrestling, then I implore you to order APW's Test for the Best, live from Mexico City, on Sunday, July 5th! I promise each and everyone of you that it will be the absolute best wrestling event to ever take place in Mexico, and not just because I'm going to win the whole darn thing! ¡Ahora voy a irme, porque este lugar apesta!
Biggs drops the mic and leaves the ring, getting huge heat from the crowd! “Spaceman” plays over the speakers as Biggs makes his way up the aisle, as the crowd throws garbage in his direction. Biggs exits the arena.
***
“Spacewalker,” by Depeche Mode, plays as First Contact flashes across the screen. Biggs is seated in his chair, clad in a Captain America T-shirt and his blue shades. He begins to speak.
Biggs: Welcome to the second episode of Biggs' First Contact! I am obviously your host, and the internet's favorite wrestler, Biggs! Firstly, I want to thank everyone for making my webshow the most streamed show on the internet this past week! There's a lot to talk about this week, so let's get started! Now this past week, I further solidified myself as Mexico's most hated wrestler by stepping into the AAA ring and berating the fans, and beating their little golden boy, La Parka, not to mention The Handsome Stranger! I beat two men in one night, and while most of you fans won't get a chance to watch it, let me assure you that I represented APW with a dignity and class that no one else in the APW is capable of!
Biggs pauses to adjust his shades.
Biggs: And speaking of winning matches, I got my second APW victory this week by pinning Assassin in the middle of the ring, though to be completely honest, it felt like he didn't even show up for the match. I know that if he shows up with the same lack of intensity in his Extreme Title match with my good friend Chris Cyrus at Test for the Best, well, let's just say good ol' Cyrus will keep a hold of his belt. That brings me to my next point, that being my match this week with none other than Streets Wilson. Now not only do I get the opportunity to defeat him this week, but Streets is also one of the competitors entered in the Test for the Best tournament, so this week's match may actually be a preview of things to come on July 5th. I'll be honest when I say that I respect Streets Wilson for all the adversity he's had to overcome in his life. I mean, not everyone who is a complete moron has the ability to make it down the ramp each and every week, getting his tail handed to him and keep on coming back for more! What, did you think I was talking about the fact that he grew up on the cold, mean streets of Stamford, Connecticut? Please, I've been to Stamford, and it's so high class, that even the bums are eating caviar! So Streets, yeah it sucks that your parents got iced in front of you while you were a young man, I'm not denying that. No child should ever have to go through that. But if you're going to try and make me believe that your upbringing caused you to be all hard and tough, well, tough luck, because I ain't buying it! Face it Streets, you're like Batman, but without the costume, gadgets, or fighting prowess, or any of the coolness for that matter, but you see, unlike Batman, you aren't using your tragedy to help others, merely to help yourself. And let's be honest here, you're not doing that good of a job at that as it is. So Streets, when you step in the ring with me this week, don't think for a moment that I'll show you any sympathy for your sob story, I know that you wouldn't want me to. The fact remains that once we step into that ring, the past doesn't matter one bit, only the here and now! The wrestling ring is the most objective place in the world, because all that matters is your skill versus your opponent's! And Streets, I know that I'm better than you!
A graphic depicting Level-One and Pence Weatherlight shows up in the corner of the screen.
Biggs: But enough about myself, let's move on to the continuing feud between Pence Weatherlight and Level-One for the APW Championship at Test for the Best! Both of these men are not a 100%, yet both picked up victories this past week on Overdrive. While Pence fought Mr. Strange in a competitive match, Level-One showed his resourcefulness in defeating Nunez! I have to applaud Level-One for the way he took Nunez out, though I still disagree with his stance about giving up the APW Title to Pence because of his ensuing match with Crazyman. Still, whether or not these men will be fully healthy by the pay per view, it doesn't change the fact that they're both in action in a tag team main event. Pence teams up with Shadow to take on Level-One and Mr. Strange, and as much as I dislike Level-One, I do feel sorry for him getting teamed with a confused, worthless individual like Mr. Strange. Still, Pence is teaming with a coward, so neither man really got the best draw in terms of partners. Still, it'll be interesting to see how the match plays out, and who will gain momentum heading into Test for the Best!
The Test for the Best logo appears on the screen.
Biggs: Now I'll talk briefly about the Test for the Best pay per view, sharing my picks for the event! With the match for the Extreme Championship between my good friend Chris Cyrus and Assassin, well, that one's a no brainer! I pick Cyrus to win easily, because let's face it, last week, Assassin pretty much no showed in his match against me, and if he does the same against Cyrus, well, it'll be a short night for Assassin indeed! Now onto the Overdrive Championship match between Shadow and Mr. Strange, even though he's a challenge dodger, I have to give the edge to Shadow. He's beaten Mr. Strange before, and he'll most certainly do it again! As for the Test for the Best tournament, well, who else is there to pick besides your's truly! I have been on a bigger roll than any of my opponents in the tournament, and no matter who I face in at the pay per view, I can assure them that they'll find out first hand why I'm out of this world! Finally, we come to the main event, Pence defending the APW Title against Level-One! Considering the fact that Level-One had to make excuses for his loss to Pence at Mayhem, I have no choice but to pick Pence Weatherlight to successfully retain the APW Heavyweight Championship! That being said, I would much rather face Level-One than Pence, because if Level-One laid down for Pence like he claims he did, well, why wouldn't he do the same for a far better wrestler like me? Not that I'd want you to, but I'm not above taking advantage of opportunities when they present themselves.
The Biggs' Shameless Plug of the Week logo flashes across the bottom of the screen.
Biggs: Unfortunately, time is nearly come to a close, so I'm going to finish up with my Shameless Plug of the Week! This week, I highly recommend that everybody goes out and read The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy! I know that there's no real timely reason for the this recommendation, but if you like science fiction and comedy, this book mixes the two expertly, and it's a quick, snappy read to boot! Well, unfortunately, that's all the time I have for this week. Until next week, keep watching the skies!
The screen fades to black as the APW logo flashes across the screen.
