Post by Nick Watson on May 13, 2009 21:00:53 GMT -4
Last time on Pences' Enlightenment.....
Pence Weatherlight, a man of the people and an all around great fighter would wake up in the early morning with one goal in mind. That goal being to meet up with EWC contractors and get some sort of deal on the table for his return. Pence believing he could deal with any sort of negative things in his contract quickly drives off, only after prepping himself for his meeting with the executives and recruiters, to the EWC HQ in Pennsylvania. Little did Pence know, but the EWC is seeking to hire him as a jobber for Kid Cannabis, because lets face it, Kid Cannabis couldn't punch his way out of a wet paper bag now. Pence, who became deeply upset with their stupidity, pointed out that this contract was not good enough and that they were cramming money down Rosen's throat, why couldn't they throw him a few more bills. They blamed the economy and Pence left, not wanting to hear another word. Pence would be found by his old friend James Snyder, now a worker for the APW in recruiting new talent. James would offer Pence a job over dinner, but Pence would decline, not wanting to gip Jeff of anything. James understood and took Pence home. Pence who was now curious as to what the APW was, began doing some research. In the present day, Pence would begin talking with Jason Royce, the resident bitch ass of the APW, he would tell him he was insignificant compared to the might of the fans, because for starters, the fans payed their wages. Royce's response was a simple clothesline to a Pence fan. Later that week, Pence would topple Jason Royce in his second main event in a row, sending a message to Level One that he didn't need to wait in line to show he was capable. Level One would then assault Pence with the belt, out of frustration for Pence having revealed his sinister plot to misuse the two fighters and stopping them from accepting. Now the story continues.....
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Pence Weatherlight Presents: Cleanup on Aisle 1!
*Three days ago*
Pence: Yeah, I'm taking a break from the enlightenment series. I'm going to pursue other stuff like...public relations.
Nick: And I support that, but why public relations? What role does it have in your career as of now? I mean you are in the title hunt. Shouldn't you be focusing on your opponents for Overdrive?
Pence: Yeah I'm in the title hunt, not that I wanted to be in it in the first place. I didn't want all of these egotistical pricks talking about how it is their time to rise to the next level of their careers breathing down my neck. Jason Royce brought me into this game and now I'm getting belittled by John Green...John fucking Green, Nick. I need a break from those two, they are just plain out irritating and at the same time are just radically retarded if they think I care about their petty squabbles. I only want to give the people entertainment and that's where the public relations come in.
Pence walked to the other side of his apartment and took a seat in the leather lazy boy which had been donated to him by the manufacture as a sign of good will. Pence really didn't want such things, he could really care less about the material aspect of his life anymore, just simply living to make others happy was giving him a sort of pick me up. Pence folded his hands on his chest and leaned back in the chair as Nick took a seat on the sofa. Nick shook his head as he took a drag of his cigar and then blew the smoke all over the room. As much as Pence was disgusted by smoking, he couldn't help but feel that it was just part of who Nick was, Nick was old and had seen a lot, his only coping mechanism was smoking and Pence could let it slide, the old man deserved some kind of relaxation method. Nick was a man in his clear 60's, he had grown up in a low income household, and had worked himself up on the streets of New York, fighting for his living. Pence respected this man not only for that, but for his accomplishments in the ring.
Not only had Nick defeated several men who Pence regarded as number one fighters in their specific genre of combat, but he had also trained some too. Now Nick was training him, teaching him of the years of experience he had, filling Pence in on how to stop clowns like John Green and Jason Royce were child's play for a man like Nick. Nick dumped the ashes of the cigar in the only ashtray in the entire apartment, which Pence had bought for those rare occasions that Nick actually wanted to visit him at home.
Nick: So what exactly do you have in mind Pence? You aren't just going to do something simple like donate are you? What the hell do you have going around in that head of yours?
Pence: Well of course not. Donating doesn't mean anything, its just a tax write off...no I want to do something critical for the fans of APW. I want to show them that people like the Level Ones and John Greens of APW are just fakes in suits, they could give less than a shit about them or their entertainment. They do what they do for themselves. Here is my plan Nick. Tonight on Overdrive, I am going to buy tickets for a whole orphanage.
Nick: Come again?
Pence: A whole orphanage Nick. I want to bring happiness to those who could not celebrate mother's day with a chance to see the APW superstars in action.
Nick: Don't you think that's a bit much? I mean it is an orphanage man...
Pence: So? These kids don't have parents...they are in a way like me. I want them to experience the energy of a match, I want them to be there when I beat both John Green and Jason Royce in the biggest display of endurance the APW has ever seen.
Nick: Alright, but what about Je...
Pence: Already cleared it with him. He said it was a great idea and that if I had any other ideas to give back to the community I should let him know.
Pence twiddled his thumbs in excitement, the sheer fact that kids who were underprivileged would be there, just because he wanted them to be was almost exhilarating for him. Nick lowered his head in defeat, there was no way to stop Pence once he made his mind up. Pence was a go getter that was for sure and there was no one that could stop him once he decided on something. Nick would shrug his shoulders and then get up.
Nick: Alright Pence. Which orphanage is it?
Pence: The address is on the counter and please hurry. I want them to be flown out first class...speaking of first class, I have got a flight to catch. See you in three days on Overdrive.
Pence got up and grabbed the suitcase which lay casually on his bed, inside were his needs: a suit, underwear, socks, and some leisure clothes. Leaving without any further words, Pence would wave behind him and continue on his way. He had a flight to catch. Nick went over to the table and picked up the piece of paper, looking at it closely, he sighed, and then exited through the door. He had a lucky orphanage to tell the good news to.
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*Present Day*
Nick: Everybody here?
All of the orphan kids clapped excitedly, they knew what was coming next. After all, before the night had even began Pence had promised Nick he would be there to see the kids and have a nice little talk with them before they went into the arena. So now all the kids, hyped up on soda and candy began cheering as Pence emerged from his locker room holding a bunch of posters and a couple copies of the first two episodes of Enlightenment. Nick looked at him quizzically.
Nick: What are you doing with all that stuff?
Pence: What do you think I'm doing? I'm giving it to the kids. They barely have anything. At least with this stuff they will have something for when they get back to Pennsylvania. Besides, whats it going to harm for these kids to get a few free items from their favorite wrestler?
Kid: Yeah, whats it going to hurt?
Nick nodded his head, he had him there and the fact that the children were digging this made him even more hyped than he was when he saw Pence trash that Royce fellow. Pence sat down behind a table and signed a few autographs and signed all of the posters, handing them out periodically and smiling the whole time. He was enjoying seeing the children's happy faces. They made him remember how he was when he was a kid, always looking for hope, and tonight he was bringing these kids hope in its rawest form. Anything could make a difference and too little could make or break these kids future. He saw potential in every single one of them, all of them were strong in their own way, once again reminding him of himself, some were fast, others strong, others were smart. In the end all of these kids were gifted with superior skills. After finishing his distribution of all the free goodies he had managed to get his hands on, Pence would stand up, and clear his throat, a silence came over the almost over the edge masses of orphans. He walked to the center of the orphans and then began to speak in his most sincere and happy voice.
Pence: Children, I know you have been through a lot. Your parents are gone and there is no telling how long until finally you are adopted into a loving and caring home. I myself am an orphan, I lost my mother and father when I was young and I know what you are going through. I know the trama and I know the pain. But don't let that overcome you, take a step above the darkness that you think looms over you and rise above it, because you children have limitless potential. The possibilities even if they look like they are far out of grasp are actually not that far away, they are right outside your doors and all you have to do is open that door and reach for your potential. Now how about it! Lets go out here and have some fun!
All of the kids begin to jump up and down with glee and follow Pence out into the arena. Pence gives them a tour of the arena, this is of course hours before opening so they are still prepping things for the night of fights. He tells them about how the pyrotechnics work and how the music cuts on exactly when he comes out to get ready to fight. They all smile, they are just glad to be there with their favorite APW superstar. As Pence wraps up the tour the kids want to take photographs. He obliges and makes as many funny faces, wide grins, and battle cries as he possibly can. The children soak it up and join him in his battle cries and face making. Finally the show is about to start and Pence smiles as the kids make their way up to the seats that belong to them. He gets into the middle of the ring and is handed a microphone by a techie, who gives him a thumbs up, saying that the microphone is powered and ready to go. Pence begins to speak loudly to everyone in attendance, they all grow quiet, knowing exactly what part of the promo this is.
Pence: Forgive me if I don't have the time to put out a long drawn out piece of shit like you do John, or the fury to clothesline some innocent man Jason. I just don't feel it necessary to put out that level of boredom or stupidity, I don't think it is necessary for two reasons. One, I don't find it necessary to lull my opponents into a sleep deprived slumber, its just uncool to have your opponent say "I want to fast forward to the end just to see what he has to say about me.", I don't have time to listen to you go on about shit that you think matters more than the state of all the people who watch us and our economy, I just don't have time and even if I did have enough time to humor you with, I wouldn't because you are an angry, sad, strange, and above all else retarded loser. Reason number two, I just don't have it in me to punch, clothesline, or kick a man when he simply believes in something different than me. Get real, this is fuckin America Royce, everybody has a say, and not always are you going to find a bunch of people who will take your shit, and call it sugar. I'm sorry, but I just can't see the intelligence behind hitting a man with a different opinion than myself. I would argue with him mind you, but in the end I would respect his opinion and go about my merry way happy that I saw the other side of the coin.
Anyways, there is no need for introduction, after all, you both know me pretty well by now. I'm the man who would have beat the man known as Level One if only Captain I can't control my rage hadn't decided to make a dick out of himself and the entire APW community. Then again the APW has seen you do a myriad of things that have rather put them to shame Royce, I would rather not spoil the community by gift wrapping them a nice little chronological report on how Jason Royce has fucked up the APW. I would rather them look it up and show them just how much of a fuck up you really are. There really isn't much to say to you after the ass whooping you got last week and you had so very little to say to me in your little rant, but what else is new. You really don't put in the effort to make it worth my while to belittle you. The saddest part about that is, is that you think you are capable of not only beating me and John Green at the same time, but you think you are capable of beating Level One at a PPV. Its a ludicrous thought at best, but then again you are quite the crazy son of a bitch. So does it really matter that you are in this match? Of course not, what really matters is who is reffing this match. No official, just Level One, and look who fucked up last time around...me and you. I stuck my nose in Level One's business and you pretty much knocked Level's lights out. And you really think you stand a chance in hell or that Level is going to call this match straight down the middle? If you believe either of those things you are much stupider than I thought you were. Anyways lets move on shall we, this show has to start soon and I am holding it up talking about a low grade entertainer like yourself.
Next on the agenda is John Green, a man who has two of the most irritating names put together. He has a very common name, which is a perfect indication of his in ring talents being sub par at best and his last name is Green...the color of sickness, which once again is a complete representation of how I felt after watching his promo. Can I say this? Your promo was abysmal, it lacked point or moral...ah what the fuck am I saying I didn't even listen to it. I was too busy thinking of the needy kids who would be here tonight to watch one of your long drawn out piece of shit promo. I have to simply wonder, who in God's name do you think gives a shit about you? Who in God's name said you were better than everybody else and more deserving of a title shot? Who in God's name ever decided that people like you should be main eventing? You pretty much make me want to chop off your head and stuff your body full of bread and throw you into a duck pond, but then I remembered your just not worth my time and plus nobody would get a kick out of seeing you dead. After all you are nothing more than a nuisance, a red blemish on the almost perfect face of society, a red blemish that recently has been infected and is needed to be removed. Don't you worry APW, Dr. Pence Weatherlight has some grade A entertainment that will remove that piece of shit right off your face, and don't worry about the bill, its on the house.
I can only imagine what has been coursing through your brain as I fast forwarded my way through your entire promo, skipping parts that seemed almost unconsequential towards the match that is happening tonight in the arena I am standing in. I can only imagine it had something to do with your diaper needing a changing or Jason Royce's dick needing to be removed from your tight ass so that your face can be relieved of all the damn frowning you do. Or maybe your face is just stuck that way, maybe you just couldn't stop frowning as your mom revealed that you were adopted and nobody really loved you. Maybe that lead to your dependency on making others out to be the monsters of the world, when a matter of fact you are the only monster in the world still pretending like his shit don't stink. John Green you are a monster, you have no morals as you said so yourself and in that same boat that pretty much eradicates you off the title scene. Why you ask? Well its simple, you have no morals thus you can not be trusted to do the right thing when the time comes, its half the reason you are standing here without a belt right now, the other half is because you just couldn't cut it. That's right John Green, you just can't cut it, the proof is all there. Every title reign you have had has lead to a much more prosperous title reign for the individual that takes it from you and when you lose you just give up...its like you don't even care. Or maybe its not that you don't care, but it is because you know just what exactly you are...your a paper weight champion, a fake, a frod, and above all else the worst possible candidate for a champion that this world has ever seen. Why beat around the bush about it? Its out in the open now.
You just can't do it John Green, you can't cut it in the division you are shooting for, the proof should be obvious when people like Level one can manipulate you like they do. It should have been obvious when you first started fighting with Jason Royce, you should have known that it was logically unsound that someone like you stood a chance against Level One. The only man in all of the APW right now who can take on Level One and walk out being the champion is me, there are no others. There is no mistake in that, you can ask everyone in the world who they think is capable of beating Level One and only one name will repeat itself...Pence Weatherlight. You can look at all of the shit you want to, you can put together some stupid bull shit and try to make me look bad, try to make me look arrogant, but in truth that is impossible. I am Pence Weatherlight, the best damn entertainer from coast to coast, to sea to shining sea, and you know what that fucking means? If you don't then let me spell it out for you. It means that I am the only man who can dethrone Level One now. I didn't want to be a part of this, I really didn't, but Jason Royce brought me in. Believe what you want to believe. Make some shit up about me wanting to be champion. I know I'm not prepared for the burden it will be, I didn't come here to be a champion right out of the box, I came here to be an entertainer to give the fans what they wanted. And that my slightly delusional friend is the truth.
Pence looks around at the arena and sees all of the people in it cheering him on, they shout as loud as they can "Weatherlight" repeaditly.
Pence: Look at this shit, you have got the fans all riveted by me talking about you. Above all else I look forward to the challenge...no...the test of endurance tonight. I relish in the opportunity of making you step out of your comfort zone and actually do something for once. I will see you both in the ring tonight, I can only hope you guys come to entertain, because I sure as hell am. Oh, before I drop the microphone and allow the techies to finish their job I have one more statement. Level One if you are watching this...you better hope to God that I lose tonight, because I may not want to be champion yet...but I sure as hell will take the burden of being a champion to crush you and show the fans just what kind of man you truly are to the masses.
Pence smiles at all the fans and stands up on one side of the ring on a turnbuckle.
Pence: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN WELCOME TO OVERDRIVE!
END
