Post by Nick Watson on Jan 9, 2013 21:58:49 GMT -4
*After Overdrive, Last Week*
The loud thud of my shoes on the hard floor of the hallway was the only sound I could hear as I began my long trek back to my locker room. Maybe I was taking my time too? After all the long, twisting hall ways of the back stage area of the arena gave me time to think about what had happened. It gave me time to consider every angle and reflect on how badly this loss had set me back in possibly finding a way to snap this losing streak.
Losing streak. Funny. Only a few weeks ago people had been talking about my championship reign and the possibilities that lay in front of me. Now people were talking about me in whispered voices.
Talking about how I would never amount to much more than some side-show attraction for this company or about how I was destined to fail at Survive and Conquer 2013. About how I had been so quiet since I had won that title and even more so when I had lost it.
People thought I couldn't hear them, but I could. I heard it all and as I heard it, inside I had to ask myself a very serious question.
Were they right?
Was I destined to fail at Survive and Conquer? Was I never going to amount to much here in this company? Had I been too quiet as champion and had I been ever so silent since my loss? I really didn't have the answers to these questions, but none the less they stirred within my head causing a rather size-able headache. Needless to say, I had lost several nights of sleep trying to piece together some kind of answer to these questions. To maybe find a God damn direction for myself, but so far that answer had easily eluded me, and to be honest I was beginning to think that the answer just wasn't there to be pieced together.
Which would of course just be my luck! Nothing seemed to ever go my way and as of late I was beginning to feel like nothing ever would. Being drawn as number one to enter Survive and Conquer, losing to Envikado, and of course letting everyone around me down in some way, shape or form. Yep, to me at this point it seemed like it couldn't get any worse. Yet, a part of me was beginning to believe that it was.
As I rounded the corner, wallowing in my own self-loathing, and thinking about all the negatives going on in my life I found Corey standing in front of my locker room door. Corey, who was normally in a happy disposition, seemed rather upset, and gave me a stern look of disappointment as I drew closer to him with each thudding step I took.
"What the hell type of performance was that out there, Nick?"
He said, his eyes glaring holes into me as I reached him. For a second, I thought I could respond, but I quickly stopped myself. There was no excuse in the world that I could make for what had occurred tonight and to even try to apologize would not make a bit of difference. Instead, I hung my head low, and let out a sigh of disappointment before replying to his question.
"I don't know what to say..."
"Of course you don't! Do you know what it looked like out there tonight?"
He paused, as if expecting me to answer, but I didn't dare reply to the question. After a few seconds of silence, Corey grunted, and then answered his own question.
"It looked like you didn't even care."
Maybe I didn't care? A new line of questioning began to pop into my head as Corey continued on with his rant.
"People pay money to see you compete, Nick. They come from all over the world to watch Action Packed wrestlers compete and to say the least you have fans...sure your fan base isn't as big as some of the other stars...but..."
"I do care, how dare you even insinuate that I don't."
Corey, looked at me long, and hard as I lifted my head up, took a deep breath, and then continued.
"I do care, Corey. I love this show, I love its fans, I love the ring crew, and I respect the hell out of the general manager. But at times...it just feels like nobody cares about me, you know? I mean lets look at the Year End awards...I mean you would think I would have been nominated for at least one award, but I wasn't! And then there is Smith who just fucking loves to make me look like some kind of cheap paperweight you can buy from target."
"I think you are reading too much into this shit, man. People love you around here."
"Am I? Am I really, Corey? Smith basically cursed my name and called me a loser, but yet instead of getting booed for that, he got cheered! Cheered, Corey. I could never get away for being a scum bag and a low life like he did and get cheered for being like that, but he did. Oh and he at least got a nomination."
He looked at me in surprise, but nodded his head. Even he couldn't ignore the facts I had just handed him.
"I'm coming off whiny, but I have a solid point here! Every time I have competed in a match people have looked down on me like I'm some kind of joke. No one shows me any respect and the only people I thought I could trust, my fans...all cheered for Smith as he took my dream away from me and slandered me in a disgusting manner."
I brushed past, Corey, who didn't look so angry at anymore by the look on his face, and then sat down on the bench in my locker room.
"I just don't know what to do. I'm starting to feel that I'm never going to be recognized by this company and that I'm just wasting my prime years here."
As I said that, I turned to grab some of my belongings, and began to pack my nearby duffle bag which I had left on the bench when I had arrived at the arena earlier that night.
"Do you think gaining recognition from your peers is as easy as winning a championship? You have to do more than that. You have to be consistent before you can receive any form of recognition and so far...to be brutally honest with you...you have been as inconsistent as inconsistent can be."
I nodded my head in agreement. I hadn't been doing well as of late and I didn't have the answer for the problem because it just kept on eluding me as to how I could remain consistent for long periods of time.
"You are a good guy, Nick. You have raw talent and a lot of younger guys would give vital organs to come in with half of the talent and potential that you do. But it is up to you to maximize your potential and take the steps to turn that raw talent into actual talent."
"You're right, I'm starting to think you're wiser beyond your years, Corey."
He grinned and I let out a friendly chuckle before following up.
"Don't let that get to your head though."
I scratched my chin as I began to think of what I could do and how I could do it. Needless to say nothing I had been doing to improve my consistency had worked so far and even more clearly there was a great deal more work to be done if I ever hoped to reach my true potential. I continued to pack as that train of thought continued to course through my head and as I finished packing I stood up and looked over at Corey.
"I apologize for this evening...next week will be better."
"I know it will."
Corey said with a grin as I nodded my head.
"I've been making a real mess of things lately. It all started with my inconsistencies, but it only got worse as I didn't say a damn thing to anyone. I need to be more active within APW and I also need to improve my over all game so that I can become more consistent. And I don't know where to turn to do that. I mean it is easy to make slight improvements here and there. And it is easy to become more active around the APW, but when it comes down to making the real improvements that will make me consistent enough to be recognized and compete every night at a main event level...well that is a lot harder to do."
Corey chuckled and then reached into his pocket. For a second, I had no clue what was so funny, but as he handed me the phone, he looked me dead in the eyes, and said.
"It is time you called Pence."
I took the phone from his hand as the realization of what needed to be done entered into my head. Pence Weatherlight was the answer to my problems! My old mentor had told me to call him if I needed him and right now, at rock bottom, and about to face a dangerous opponent in Mac Bane...well I needed him more than ever. As I dialed the number that he had given me in case of emergency, a number which I had stored in my wallet, I began to think of what would happen if Pence couldn't help me.
Pence was no miracle worker after all. I mean people still remembered him and got excited about the chance of seeing him again because of how his talent had translated in APW, but there was always the chance that anything he told me to do would fail. I needed to be prepared for that and as Pence finally answered the phone, I knew I was prepared for whatever outcome was coming my way. Regardless of how things turned out, I would stick with the path that I was about to tread down.
"Hey, Pence...it is me, Nick. I need some help..."
*Scene fades to black*
*Present Day*
The scene re-opens in a gym, where Corey and I have been waiting for some time on the arrival of Pence Weatherlight. My mentor was running a bit late and as we sat around waiting, I nudged Corey who had been fiddling around with his camera for some time.
"What?"
He said as he looked at me with a look of aggravation. I had clearly startled him, as he had been so focused on setting up the camera he had been working on.
"Is it working? I think I want to try and get my message in before Pence arrives, after all I don't think I will have the energy to put together coherent thoughts after he is finished with me today."
"I think I can do some basic recording...nothing flashy because I'm still getting used to the camera and all of its gadgets."
"Where did you get the camera from, anyway?"
"My parents sent me it for Christmas."
"Wow! That is so cool. All I got was some knitted sweaters and a couple hundred dollars to play around with."
"Sweaters? Man, that blows."
"Tell me about it...but I suppose it is the thought that counts right? My mom doesn't want me getting cold and decided that she needed to knit me a sweater. And who am I to say no to her?"
Corey chuckled and I could tell he was thinking I was such a momma's boy, in response I gave him a quick punch on the arm, which caused Corey to wince in pain, and give me an angry glare.
"Ow, dude...that fucking hurt."
"You are such a baby! Now can you record or not."
One angry glare later and Corey had his camera pointed at me, just waiting for my queue to start the recording. After adjusting my position so I was facing the camera, I would give the queue, and Corey would give me the thumbs up before pressing the record button.
"Last week on Overdrive it was Mac Bane, Buckson Gooch, and I versus Shadow, Delikado, and Evan Envi. In this match, I let my teammates down when they needed me the most, and in the end we lost pretty handily to the opposition we were facing.
I, personally, am willing to shoulder the majority of the blame for that loss. With how things have been for me as of late with my title being taken from me and a feeling of not being recognized causing me inner turmoil it is understandable that I am the reason we did not walk out with the W last week. It is also in that same regard that I know for a fact that more than likely you have a lot to say to me, Mac Bane. After all we were teammates at Overdrive last week and it is because of me that you and Buckson failed to capatilize on the discord between Shadow and Envikado.
So...I am more than willing to fully be blamed for this. To be yelled at, to be called names, and to be treated like a down right pathetic person because last week...I failed you, Gooch, and the fans that I adore and hope will continue to support me through out this year as I try to find a way to put out a consistent level of effort worthy of their praise and adoration."
I pause as I scratch my chin, which is beginning to show a bit of peach fuzz due to me not shaving in a few days, and then I continue on.
"You deserve to call me shit, Bane...I fucked up and I know it, but to some degree and regard you screwed the pooch too.
We both tragically under-performed and let our partner, our fans, and ourselves down, but it is what we do with that knowledge of our shortcomings that will define us. As we speak, I have help on the way to get me into fighting shape, and to help me improve my game, but what have you done, but radiate an aura of silence? I expected more from a man at your level of talent, in fact I expected you to send out a message to me as quickly as possible, and to call me out on my pathetic showing, but you didn't.
Out of respect or out of sheer confusion as to what to say about your poor performance last week, I don't know, and neither do I care, but the fact remains that you have been quiet. And to what you're doing to make up for your poor showing any guess at this point would be a crap shoot, but so far I've seen nothing that suggests that you are making any improvements to make up for the poor showing last week."
I pause again and continue after I take a quick look at the door to make sure that Pence isn't here yet.
"It's not like I'm insinuating that you haven't done anything. I'm just saying that it would have been nice if you had said something by now or at least made an apology to Buckson...the man who really deserves every bit of our apology for the poor effort we gave him. Anyway..."
"Are you really be a bleeding heart? Come on, balls up, Nick!"
I look up to see Pence Weatherlight standing next to me, looking at me in a disapproving manner.
"Step aside, rookie."
He says it politely, but shoves me a bit out of the way so that he can sit on the the same bench we are, and can face the camera. He rubs his growing beard and then begins to talk to the masses.
"Okay, Mr. Bane...last week I watched you put on one of the most pathetic displays I have ever seen. You choked, pretty fucking hard, and have said absolutely nothing as my protege Nick said.
Now, normally a man with actual testicles would come out an apologize swiftly, especially if he is teamed up with the guy he let down, but instead we are sitting here in silence wondering where the fuck you are! Meanwhile, your partner for all of his hard work last week is off getting his opportunity at fame and fortune...because he deserves it! Because Gooch works hard each and every single day and is hungry for success.
You on the other hand have been completely and utterly useless to him even though Gooch has been more than a loyal friend and follower! It's disgusting and you should be ashamed to call yourself his tag team partner."
"Don't you think that is a bit harsh. Mac Bane is a good guy and I respect the hell out of him."
"This guy left you and Gooch hanging dry...well more Gooch than you because of the shit you pulled."
I looked down at the floor and then Pence stood up and then knelt down in front of me. Corey turned off the camera as Pence began to talk to me.
"You want respect...you have to earn it and demand it from everyone around you."
"Just because I want to be respected doesn't mean I want to be rude to everyone around me."
"And you won't be...by the end of my training you won't need to be rude...you will earn people's respect through hard work and good intentions. So come on, Chin up, and lets get on the ball!"
As Pence stood up, I nodded my head, and then stood up myself. He nodded his head as the scene fades to black.
The loud thud of my shoes on the hard floor of the hallway was the only sound I could hear as I began my long trek back to my locker room. Maybe I was taking my time too? After all the long, twisting hall ways of the back stage area of the arena gave me time to think about what had happened. It gave me time to consider every angle and reflect on how badly this loss had set me back in possibly finding a way to snap this losing streak.
Losing streak. Funny. Only a few weeks ago people had been talking about my championship reign and the possibilities that lay in front of me. Now people were talking about me in whispered voices.
Talking about how I would never amount to much more than some side-show attraction for this company or about how I was destined to fail at Survive and Conquer 2013. About how I had been so quiet since I had won that title and even more so when I had lost it.
People thought I couldn't hear them, but I could. I heard it all and as I heard it, inside I had to ask myself a very serious question.
Were they right?
Was I destined to fail at Survive and Conquer? Was I never going to amount to much here in this company? Had I been too quiet as champion and had I been ever so silent since my loss? I really didn't have the answers to these questions, but none the less they stirred within my head causing a rather size-able headache. Needless to say, I had lost several nights of sleep trying to piece together some kind of answer to these questions. To maybe find a God damn direction for myself, but so far that answer had easily eluded me, and to be honest I was beginning to think that the answer just wasn't there to be pieced together.
Which would of course just be my luck! Nothing seemed to ever go my way and as of late I was beginning to feel like nothing ever would. Being drawn as number one to enter Survive and Conquer, losing to Envikado, and of course letting everyone around me down in some way, shape or form. Yep, to me at this point it seemed like it couldn't get any worse. Yet, a part of me was beginning to believe that it was.
As I rounded the corner, wallowing in my own self-loathing, and thinking about all the negatives going on in my life I found Corey standing in front of my locker room door. Corey, who was normally in a happy disposition, seemed rather upset, and gave me a stern look of disappointment as I drew closer to him with each thudding step I took.
"What the hell type of performance was that out there, Nick?"
He said, his eyes glaring holes into me as I reached him. For a second, I thought I could respond, but I quickly stopped myself. There was no excuse in the world that I could make for what had occurred tonight and to even try to apologize would not make a bit of difference. Instead, I hung my head low, and let out a sigh of disappointment before replying to his question.
"I don't know what to say..."
"Of course you don't! Do you know what it looked like out there tonight?"
He paused, as if expecting me to answer, but I didn't dare reply to the question. After a few seconds of silence, Corey grunted, and then answered his own question.
"It looked like you didn't even care."
Maybe I didn't care? A new line of questioning began to pop into my head as Corey continued on with his rant.
"People pay money to see you compete, Nick. They come from all over the world to watch Action Packed wrestlers compete and to say the least you have fans...sure your fan base isn't as big as some of the other stars...but..."
"I do care, how dare you even insinuate that I don't."
Corey, looked at me long, and hard as I lifted my head up, took a deep breath, and then continued.
"I do care, Corey. I love this show, I love its fans, I love the ring crew, and I respect the hell out of the general manager. But at times...it just feels like nobody cares about me, you know? I mean lets look at the Year End awards...I mean you would think I would have been nominated for at least one award, but I wasn't! And then there is Smith who just fucking loves to make me look like some kind of cheap paperweight you can buy from target."
"I think you are reading too much into this shit, man. People love you around here."
"Am I? Am I really, Corey? Smith basically cursed my name and called me a loser, but yet instead of getting booed for that, he got cheered! Cheered, Corey. I could never get away for being a scum bag and a low life like he did and get cheered for being like that, but he did. Oh and he at least got a nomination."
He looked at me in surprise, but nodded his head. Even he couldn't ignore the facts I had just handed him.
"I'm coming off whiny, but I have a solid point here! Every time I have competed in a match people have looked down on me like I'm some kind of joke. No one shows me any respect and the only people I thought I could trust, my fans...all cheered for Smith as he took my dream away from me and slandered me in a disgusting manner."
I brushed past, Corey, who didn't look so angry at anymore by the look on his face, and then sat down on the bench in my locker room.
"I just don't know what to do. I'm starting to feel that I'm never going to be recognized by this company and that I'm just wasting my prime years here."
As I said that, I turned to grab some of my belongings, and began to pack my nearby duffle bag which I had left on the bench when I had arrived at the arena earlier that night.
"Do you think gaining recognition from your peers is as easy as winning a championship? You have to do more than that. You have to be consistent before you can receive any form of recognition and so far...to be brutally honest with you...you have been as inconsistent as inconsistent can be."
I nodded my head in agreement. I hadn't been doing well as of late and I didn't have the answer for the problem because it just kept on eluding me as to how I could remain consistent for long periods of time.
"You are a good guy, Nick. You have raw talent and a lot of younger guys would give vital organs to come in with half of the talent and potential that you do. But it is up to you to maximize your potential and take the steps to turn that raw talent into actual talent."
"You're right, I'm starting to think you're wiser beyond your years, Corey."
He grinned and I let out a friendly chuckle before following up.
"Don't let that get to your head though."
I scratched my chin as I began to think of what I could do and how I could do it. Needless to say nothing I had been doing to improve my consistency had worked so far and even more clearly there was a great deal more work to be done if I ever hoped to reach my true potential. I continued to pack as that train of thought continued to course through my head and as I finished packing I stood up and looked over at Corey.
"I apologize for this evening...next week will be better."
"I know it will."
Corey said with a grin as I nodded my head.
"I've been making a real mess of things lately. It all started with my inconsistencies, but it only got worse as I didn't say a damn thing to anyone. I need to be more active within APW and I also need to improve my over all game so that I can become more consistent. And I don't know where to turn to do that. I mean it is easy to make slight improvements here and there. And it is easy to become more active around the APW, but when it comes down to making the real improvements that will make me consistent enough to be recognized and compete every night at a main event level...well that is a lot harder to do."
Corey chuckled and then reached into his pocket. For a second, I had no clue what was so funny, but as he handed me the phone, he looked me dead in the eyes, and said.
"It is time you called Pence."
I took the phone from his hand as the realization of what needed to be done entered into my head. Pence Weatherlight was the answer to my problems! My old mentor had told me to call him if I needed him and right now, at rock bottom, and about to face a dangerous opponent in Mac Bane...well I needed him more than ever. As I dialed the number that he had given me in case of emergency, a number which I had stored in my wallet, I began to think of what would happen if Pence couldn't help me.
Pence was no miracle worker after all. I mean people still remembered him and got excited about the chance of seeing him again because of how his talent had translated in APW, but there was always the chance that anything he told me to do would fail. I needed to be prepared for that and as Pence finally answered the phone, I knew I was prepared for whatever outcome was coming my way. Regardless of how things turned out, I would stick with the path that I was about to tread down.
"Hey, Pence...it is me, Nick. I need some help..."
*Scene fades to black*
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
*Present Day*
The scene re-opens in a gym, where Corey and I have been waiting for some time on the arrival of Pence Weatherlight. My mentor was running a bit late and as we sat around waiting, I nudged Corey who had been fiddling around with his camera for some time.
"What?"
He said as he looked at me with a look of aggravation. I had clearly startled him, as he had been so focused on setting up the camera he had been working on.
"Is it working? I think I want to try and get my message in before Pence arrives, after all I don't think I will have the energy to put together coherent thoughts after he is finished with me today."
"I think I can do some basic recording...nothing flashy because I'm still getting used to the camera and all of its gadgets."
"Where did you get the camera from, anyway?"
"My parents sent me it for Christmas."
"Wow! That is so cool. All I got was some knitted sweaters and a couple hundred dollars to play around with."
"Sweaters? Man, that blows."
"Tell me about it...but I suppose it is the thought that counts right? My mom doesn't want me getting cold and decided that she needed to knit me a sweater. And who am I to say no to her?"
Corey chuckled and I could tell he was thinking I was such a momma's boy, in response I gave him a quick punch on the arm, which caused Corey to wince in pain, and give me an angry glare.
"Ow, dude...that fucking hurt."
"You are such a baby! Now can you record or not."
One angry glare later and Corey had his camera pointed at me, just waiting for my queue to start the recording. After adjusting my position so I was facing the camera, I would give the queue, and Corey would give me the thumbs up before pressing the record button.
"Last week on Overdrive it was Mac Bane, Buckson Gooch, and I versus Shadow, Delikado, and Evan Envi. In this match, I let my teammates down when they needed me the most, and in the end we lost pretty handily to the opposition we were facing.
I, personally, am willing to shoulder the majority of the blame for that loss. With how things have been for me as of late with my title being taken from me and a feeling of not being recognized causing me inner turmoil it is understandable that I am the reason we did not walk out with the W last week. It is also in that same regard that I know for a fact that more than likely you have a lot to say to me, Mac Bane. After all we were teammates at Overdrive last week and it is because of me that you and Buckson failed to capatilize on the discord between Shadow and Envikado.
So...I am more than willing to fully be blamed for this. To be yelled at, to be called names, and to be treated like a down right pathetic person because last week...I failed you, Gooch, and the fans that I adore and hope will continue to support me through out this year as I try to find a way to put out a consistent level of effort worthy of their praise and adoration."
I pause as I scratch my chin, which is beginning to show a bit of peach fuzz due to me not shaving in a few days, and then I continue on.
"You deserve to call me shit, Bane...I fucked up and I know it, but to some degree and regard you screwed the pooch too.
We both tragically under-performed and let our partner, our fans, and ourselves down, but it is what we do with that knowledge of our shortcomings that will define us. As we speak, I have help on the way to get me into fighting shape, and to help me improve my game, but what have you done, but radiate an aura of silence? I expected more from a man at your level of talent, in fact I expected you to send out a message to me as quickly as possible, and to call me out on my pathetic showing, but you didn't.
Out of respect or out of sheer confusion as to what to say about your poor performance last week, I don't know, and neither do I care, but the fact remains that you have been quiet. And to what you're doing to make up for your poor showing any guess at this point would be a crap shoot, but so far I've seen nothing that suggests that you are making any improvements to make up for the poor showing last week."
I pause again and continue after I take a quick look at the door to make sure that Pence isn't here yet.
"It's not like I'm insinuating that you haven't done anything. I'm just saying that it would have been nice if you had said something by now or at least made an apology to Buckson...the man who really deserves every bit of our apology for the poor effort we gave him. Anyway..."
"Are you really be a bleeding heart? Come on, balls up, Nick!"
I look up to see Pence Weatherlight standing next to me, looking at me in a disapproving manner.
"Step aside, rookie."
He says it politely, but shoves me a bit out of the way so that he can sit on the the same bench we are, and can face the camera. He rubs his growing beard and then begins to talk to the masses.
"Okay, Mr. Bane...last week I watched you put on one of the most pathetic displays I have ever seen. You choked, pretty fucking hard, and have said absolutely nothing as my protege Nick said.
Now, normally a man with actual testicles would come out an apologize swiftly, especially if he is teamed up with the guy he let down, but instead we are sitting here in silence wondering where the fuck you are! Meanwhile, your partner for all of his hard work last week is off getting his opportunity at fame and fortune...because he deserves it! Because Gooch works hard each and every single day and is hungry for success.
You on the other hand have been completely and utterly useless to him even though Gooch has been more than a loyal friend and follower! It's disgusting and you should be ashamed to call yourself his tag team partner."
"Don't you think that is a bit harsh. Mac Bane is a good guy and I respect the hell out of him."
"This guy left you and Gooch hanging dry...well more Gooch than you because of the shit you pulled."
I looked down at the floor and then Pence stood up and then knelt down in front of me. Corey turned off the camera as Pence began to talk to me.
"You want respect...you have to earn it and demand it from everyone around you."
"Just because I want to be respected doesn't mean I want to be rude to everyone around me."
"And you won't be...by the end of my training you won't need to be rude...you will earn people's respect through hard work and good intentions. So come on, Chin up, and lets get on the ball!"
As Pence stood up, I nodded my head, and then stood up myself. He nodded his head as the scene fades to black.
