Feedback for Feedback

[Kevin Dahlia]

apwprez.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=meltdownrp&action=display&thread=16298&page=1#1360954594

My latest showing. Just looking for feedback for what I'm doing right, what I'm doing wrong, and ways to fix it.

For ANYONE[/U][/I][/SIZE][/COLOR] who oblieges, I will provide feedback for them as well on their next thread. Promise.

[Jules]

I haven't read the RP, but I wanted to comment and say well done bro, this is the right kind of attitude. I gave you a bit of flack in my Meltdown feedback last week, so it's only right I comment when you front up. Good on you dude.

And I'll make you an offer: get roleplays up for three consecutive shows and I promise I'll give you feedback on all three.

EDIT: Further to my offer, you won't have to give me feedback either. So it's win-win.

[Cid Phoenix 2013]

Hey Kev-Kev! Phoenix here. I read your roleplay and I must say some good character building as far as developing the storyline business relationship between Dahlia and Washington. However, as advice from rp'er to rp'er. You may want to tone down the filler stuff and focus a bit more on your opponent or the match at hand. It's cool to rp that Dahlia feels that Phoenix is nothing more than a pushover, but I was hoping to hear more from Dahlia and less from Chase. Just a helpful hint, bro - I would post the developmental stuff for the characters in the House Show thread, as that's really kind of why it's there, and use the heavy hitting big guns aimed at your opponent for the main show thread. I must admit though, I loved your play on words. You're very eloquent in your rp's - It's a pleasure to see that it stands out so well. Anyway, bro I hope that I helped out. We're all here to put on a good showing & grow as characters, pm buddies and friends. Best of luck to you as well in our match! Interesting to see how Kevin Dahlia develops over time here in APW.