Post by KJE on Apr 20, 2013 10:22:46 GMT -4
The last two weeks have gone by as a blur. After winning the Suicide Championship I felt the need to go and enjoy it while I could. Of course I celebrated. I know my luck, and I know how much of a target gets put on ones back if they have gold around their waists. I am not new to holding a belt, but it has been a while since I have been able to retain one. My days of being great are behind me, and I am strong enough to admit it... at least to myself. I don't want this time to be like all the rest lately though.. this time... I want to stay on the top like I used to in the day. Make a name for myself outside of Sienna's little helper. I need to show everyone here that I am not a one hit wonder.... that I am not a fluke of a champion.... I need to show them the athlete I used to be. Do I still have it in me is the question.
I don't know how long I sat there ready to lift my glass for a drink, but having stopped after my hands touched it. I stared at the clear glass, the water inside, and got lost in my thoughts. It could have been seconds, minutes, who knew.
”Yo Chic!”
It wasn't so much the words, but more of the small shove that shook me out of my trance. I shook my head and blinked a moment before looking up at Jason.
”You know I hate it when you call me that. So distasteful.”
I shuddered and I seen the smirk come across his face.
”You might hate it but it did the trick. What's up with you? Don't go telling me nothing either.”
”It's... I don't know, everything?”
The fact that I stated it as a question just had him sitting there silent waiting for more. In times like this he knew I would elaborate, it just might take a moment. In all honesty, I didn't want to have this conversation. I didn't want to talk about work when with him because as it was we only got to spend such little time together anyway. Meeting up a few days before Asylum seemed like a great idea, even if with everything going on it didn't happen until a day before showtime.
”I keep asking myself, what made me come back to this business. I mean, my body has been through hell and back. Even when I had returned after the cancer was gone I just never could get back to the top of my game, well I did once, and had a nice run after defeating you. Again I walked away though ... but no matter how many times I leave... I always return back to the ring.”
”We both know you couldn't stay away from me once you found out I was running solo again. Girls just love the Kash.”
”I think all those years of smoking went to your head Jason. Maybe just a little.”
He got a smile out of me though, and I knew that was his goal. It was small, but it was something. He didn't even give a look when I mentioned defeating him for his title. It was in the past, and because of how I stepped up to the challenge, I earned his respect. But here... now... god forbid someone gave respect where it was due.
”So what's got you thinking like this? It's Logan isn't it?”
I wanted to say no, but I couldn't lie. It was.
”Yes. No. Maybe? I don't know. I don't want this match... ill be honest. It's like.. the title shot shocked the hell out of me in the first place. I didn't do anything fancy to earn it, but it came my way. Did people expect me to turn it down? They are fucking crazy if they wanted me too. I don't turn away title shots... but I make the best of them, and I made that clear. I said from day one that when the time was right I would shock the shit out of the world... Parker didn't believe me, Logan didn't believe me. Hell, no one probably did.”
Fuck what everyone else thinks! You need to stop caring about that. Once you do, things will be so much easier.”
”You know me though, no matter how many times I say I don't give a damn about what others think... in the back of my mind I do. I can put up a good front about anything... but honestly.. I am sick of most of the things I hear people say. Like when I left before to get the treatments... All I heard about was how I must have been selling myself to keep living the way I was. God forbid in this day and age someone actually saves money in case things don't go as planned. You know what though... Things don't go as planned all the time, and I am hoping and praying that this week is no different. Logan is so high up on his petal-stool thinking I can't get him down for a three count... I know I have said it before... but I seriously wish I could prove him wrong.”
”You can Kay. Think back to all the time you put into defeating me. All the energy you put forth. You have it in you to defeat anyone. Don't give up.”
I knew he was right. I wouldn't say it though because I didn't need to jinx myself... but deep down, I knew if I tried hard enough I could defeat Logan in the ring, and I was going to try my damnedest to do so.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Fresh out of the shower and changed I stood here looking at the bruises I have been covering up left by the paint ball pellets that Aubrey J. Parker had sent my way. That shit hurt like hell. No doubt about it. The one to the throat knocked the wind out of me, but it fueled my fire even more so. But with everything going on last week... it was like something out of a movie. Parker.... something was not right about her. I can't think about her though.. I have Logan to think about, and how to defeat him was another story all together.
“It's funny how people get so comfortable in their own shell, only to get cocky, and arrogant in the end. It comes back to bite them in the ass. Parker found that out last week. She had beaten me so many times in the ring, and she got so comfortable with it, that she didn't change anything up, she continued to do things the way she had been doing them, and look where it got her... I stole her last baby away.
This week I am hoping that the same thing doesn't happen. I am hoping and praying that Logan has enough sense to step it up when I hit him harder than I ever have before.
I have what it takes to be here, and I have proven that. Some might not see it, but those who matter have seen that I can get shit done.
I don't need to suck up to anyone, or suck anything to get where I am, and get the opportunities that have been given to me. If I set my mind to it, I can get things done, and this week I am going to prove that once again... or die trying.”
I knew some might think my words are just that... but that is not the case. I was... am positive that I will be showing Logan more fight than I ever have before.
”I know you think the lowest of me Logan, and I am fine with that. I have come to expect that from you. When things don't go your way, you run your mouth and claim conspiracy. Every time something is sent in someone else direction it is a shot at Aubrey and You. Quite frankly, I am sick of it. Sure I don't think I should have gotten a shot at the title, but it was given to me. I might not win all my matches here.. or even most of them, but what I do is suck it up and come back fighting harder the next time around. I never fucking give up. That counts for something. It might not count to you... but it does to Management. They are the ones calling the shots. Not you. Not Parker, and you can not fucking stand it. Guess what though.. the time for M&M is over. I said it was my goal to make sure you and she lost everything... and now... now that you lost it all.. I am satisfied. I am willing to move on.
Or I was... until you were placed across from me this week once more. I know you are fumed about it Logan. You can not stand me. You can't stand anything I say, do. Nothing. And once more you were placed into the ring against someone you feel is lesser than you. Keep thinking it. It took me a while to prove it to Parker, and I have all the time in the world to prove it to you as well.
I am more than ready to face you in the ring one on one again. I am beyond ready to show you that I am not the half ass wrestler you think I am. You are about to be hit with a reality check Logan. This is not your world... this is not your time to shine. This is mine. The gold is around my waist for a reason, and it's going to stay there as long as I have a say in the matter.
The title might not be on the line this week, but every match has to be treated as if it is. I can't give anyone a reason to think they will be able to take the belt from around my waist. I never go for the gold... but I have no problem taking it when given the opportunity. I said I was here to make your life hell, and you might not see it that way... but you are falling. Your time is almost up. After I beat you in the ring... You will never be able to say I have never beaten you. There will always be that time that I have after this week, and it will haunt you until the day you die.
My time is NOW Logan. I am not going anywhere any time soon.. and I am not backing down. I love a challenge, and you sir... you are a challenge. Right now... it's time to change your way of thinking. I am not going to be the same woman you have stepped into the ring with the last few weeks. After losing at RassleMania I have been training harder than ever to prove the world wrong about me... and it started last week with Parker, and continues this week with you.”
Talking with Jason changed my way of thinking. I have my confidence back now, and I am ready for any challenge that is put in my way. It's time to start making a name for myself in this company. Not as Sienna's helper, but as a wrestler who is not to be taken lightly. I will not be walked on. I am making sure of that. It's time for everyone in APW to see what I am really capable of. It's time to keep myself in the spotlight... and I dare any motherfucker to try and get me out of it once I get started.
I don't know how long I sat there ready to lift my glass for a drink, but having stopped after my hands touched it. I stared at the clear glass, the water inside, and got lost in my thoughts. It could have been seconds, minutes, who knew.
”Yo Chic!”
It wasn't so much the words, but more of the small shove that shook me out of my trance. I shook my head and blinked a moment before looking up at Jason.
”You know I hate it when you call me that. So distasteful.”
I shuddered and I seen the smirk come across his face.
”You might hate it but it did the trick. What's up with you? Don't go telling me nothing either.”
”It's... I don't know, everything?”
The fact that I stated it as a question just had him sitting there silent waiting for more. In times like this he knew I would elaborate, it just might take a moment. In all honesty, I didn't want to have this conversation. I didn't want to talk about work when with him because as it was we only got to spend such little time together anyway. Meeting up a few days before Asylum seemed like a great idea, even if with everything going on it didn't happen until a day before showtime.
”I keep asking myself, what made me come back to this business. I mean, my body has been through hell and back. Even when I had returned after the cancer was gone I just never could get back to the top of my game, well I did once, and had a nice run after defeating you. Again I walked away though ... but no matter how many times I leave... I always return back to the ring.”
”We both know you couldn't stay away from me once you found out I was running solo again. Girls just love the Kash.”
”I think all those years of smoking went to your head Jason. Maybe just a little.”
He got a smile out of me though, and I knew that was his goal. It was small, but it was something. He didn't even give a look when I mentioned defeating him for his title. It was in the past, and because of how I stepped up to the challenge, I earned his respect. But here... now... god forbid someone gave respect where it was due.
”So what's got you thinking like this? It's Logan isn't it?”
I wanted to say no, but I couldn't lie. It was.
”Yes. No. Maybe? I don't know. I don't want this match... ill be honest. It's like.. the title shot shocked the hell out of me in the first place. I didn't do anything fancy to earn it, but it came my way. Did people expect me to turn it down? They are fucking crazy if they wanted me too. I don't turn away title shots... but I make the best of them, and I made that clear. I said from day one that when the time was right I would shock the shit out of the world... Parker didn't believe me, Logan didn't believe me. Hell, no one probably did.”
Fuck what everyone else thinks! You need to stop caring about that. Once you do, things will be so much easier.”
”You know me though, no matter how many times I say I don't give a damn about what others think... in the back of my mind I do. I can put up a good front about anything... but honestly.. I am sick of most of the things I hear people say. Like when I left before to get the treatments... All I heard about was how I must have been selling myself to keep living the way I was. God forbid in this day and age someone actually saves money in case things don't go as planned. You know what though... Things don't go as planned all the time, and I am hoping and praying that this week is no different. Logan is so high up on his petal-stool thinking I can't get him down for a three count... I know I have said it before... but I seriously wish I could prove him wrong.”
”You can Kay. Think back to all the time you put into defeating me. All the energy you put forth. You have it in you to defeat anyone. Don't give up.”
I knew he was right. I wouldn't say it though because I didn't need to jinx myself... but deep down, I knew if I tried hard enough I could defeat Logan in the ring, and I was going to try my damnedest to do so.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Fresh out of the shower and changed I stood here looking at the bruises I have been covering up left by the paint ball pellets that Aubrey J. Parker had sent my way. That shit hurt like hell. No doubt about it. The one to the throat knocked the wind out of me, but it fueled my fire even more so. But with everything going on last week... it was like something out of a movie. Parker.... something was not right about her. I can't think about her though.. I have Logan to think about, and how to defeat him was another story all together.
“It's funny how people get so comfortable in their own shell, only to get cocky, and arrogant in the end. It comes back to bite them in the ass. Parker found that out last week. She had beaten me so many times in the ring, and she got so comfortable with it, that she didn't change anything up, she continued to do things the way she had been doing them, and look where it got her... I stole her last baby away.
This week I am hoping that the same thing doesn't happen. I am hoping and praying that Logan has enough sense to step it up when I hit him harder than I ever have before.
I have what it takes to be here, and I have proven that. Some might not see it, but those who matter have seen that I can get shit done.
I don't need to suck up to anyone, or suck anything to get where I am, and get the opportunities that have been given to me. If I set my mind to it, I can get things done, and this week I am going to prove that once again... or die trying.”
I knew some might think my words are just that... but that is not the case. I was... am positive that I will be showing Logan more fight than I ever have before.
”I know you think the lowest of me Logan, and I am fine with that. I have come to expect that from you. When things don't go your way, you run your mouth and claim conspiracy. Every time something is sent in someone else direction it is a shot at Aubrey and You. Quite frankly, I am sick of it. Sure I don't think I should have gotten a shot at the title, but it was given to me. I might not win all my matches here.. or even most of them, but what I do is suck it up and come back fighting harder the next time around. I never fucking give up. That counts for something. It might not count to you... but it does to Management. They are the ones calling the shots. Not you. Not Parker, and you can not fucking stand it. Guess what though.. the time for M&M is over. I said it was my goal to make sure you and she lost everything... and now... now that you lost it all.. I am satisfied. I am willing to move on.
Or I was... until you were placed across from me this week once more. I know you are fumed about it Logan. You can not stand me. You can't stand anything I say, do. Nothing. And once more you were placed into the ring against someone you feel is lesser than you. Keep thinking it. It took me a while to prove it to Parker, and I have all the time in the world to prove it to you as well.
I am more than ready to face you in the ring one on one again. I am beyond ready to show you that I am not the half ass wrestler you think I am. You are about to be hit with a reality check Logan. This is not your world... this is not your time to shine. This is mine. The gold is around my waist for a reason, and it's going to stay there as long as I have a say in the matter.
The title might not be on the line this week, but every match has to be treated as if it is. I can't give anyone a reason to think they will be able to take the belt from around my waist. I never go for the gold... but I have no problem taking it when given the opportunity. I said I was here to make your life hell, and you might not see it that way... but you are falling. Your time is almost up. After I beat you in the ring... You will never be able to say I have never beaten you. There will always be that time that I have after this week, and it will haunt you until the day you die.
My time is NOW Logan. I am not going anywhere any time soon.. and I am not backing down. I love a challenge, and you sir... you are a challenge. Right now... it's time to change your way of thinking. I am not going to be the same woman you have stepped into the ring with the last few weeks. After losing at RassleMania I have been training harder than ever to prove the world wrong about me... and it started last week with Parker, and continues this week with you.”
Talking with Jason changed my way of thinking. I have my confidence back now, and I am ready for any challenge that is put in my way. It's time to start making a name for myself in this company. Not as Sienna's helper, but as a wrestler who is not to be taken lightly. I will not be walked on. I am making sure of that. It's time for everyone in APW to see what I am really capable of. It's time to keep myself in the spotlight... and I dare any motherfucker to try and get me out of it once I get started.
”This is not a game to me.
Not just my career.
This is my life.
Be ready Logan.
Your time defeating me is about to be over.”
Not just my career.
This is my life.
Be ready Logan.
Your time defeating me is about to be over.”
