Post by gzavadak on May 27, 2013 11:32:01 GMT -4
The first appearance of “The Evangelist” in Action Packed Wrestling could be deemed nothing short of a success. Granted, calling the opposition lackluster would be doing the man who calls himself Legion a favor. A man who claimed to have the same calling and mission as the Reverend Jerry Matthews did everything he could to show that he was the real chosen instrument of God the Father, but alas, trial by combat showed who the superior holy man was.
Yet, for all the joy and satisfaction that decimating Legion brought, the night can still only serve as a warning shot to the rest of the Monday Night Meltdown brand and the rest of APW as a whole. Legion was nothing more than yet another example of a false prophet, a man who has brainwashed himself into buying his own hype and competence, with very little reason to do so. This victory is nothing more than a stepping stone, the first stride down a road that is, as Robert Frost would call it, far less traveled. There will be many challenges, it cannot be doubted that APW has quite the roster. But, only one man will compete weekly with the kind of blessings imbued on him by God the Father himself. And that man is God’s chosen broadsword himself, Reverend Jerry Matthews, “The Evangelist.”
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Scene 1 – Birmingham First Baptist Church, Birmingham, Alabama – Present Day
The scene opens to a classroom in the basement of Birmingham First Baptist Church. The plain white walls are covered in a number of posters, some simply being portraits of Jesus Christ or some of the more famous prophets like Moses, Elijah or Samuel. Others depict some of the more epic deeds of the Bible’s most faithful Christians like David slaying Goliath with a well-placed stone to the forehead, King Solomon rendering his famous judgment on who the true mother of a child was, and Jesus and his disciples breaking bread during the Last Supper in the Upper Room.
In the middle of the room sits a small rectangular wooden table. Around the table sit a number of chairs, but the chairs are noticeably smaller than normal. The reason for this is explained by the chairs’ occupants, a number of young children each dressed in their Sunday best. The children range in age from about 5 to 7 years of age, and the boys are wearing plain white shirts and suspenders. The girls are all wearing full ankle-length dresses, with not a hint of skin showing. The children are sitting there silently, until the only door to the room opens.
Into the room walks the Reverend Jerry Matthews, with his spiritual liaison Deacon Jeremiah Robinson in tow. Matthews is wearing his trademark white cotton suit and black shirt, and the crucifix on his mask seems to be standing out more than usual. Deacon Jeremiah is wearing a black suit and white shirt as well as a pair of black Oakley sunglasses. The children look up and see the pair, and prop up immediately to attention. Matthews is carrying a Bible, which he sets down on the table. He then begins to address the class of children with a smile.
Matthews: Boys and girls, how was our week?
The boys and girls cheerfully reply to the preacher in unison.
Boys and Girls: Good, Pastor Matthews!!
Matthews: That’s good to hear children. I’m glad to see each and every one of your bright and shining faces on this day, the Lord’s day. No matter what, each of you should always remember your duty to dedicate Sunday to the Most High, because even he himself did so when he performed the ultimate labor in creating the world.
Matthews picks up his Bible off of the table. He flips to a certain page he had marked and then continues.
Matthews: Now, today we’re going to be learning about the book of Leviticus. For those of you that were here last week, can any of you tell me what happened to Moses and the Israelites after they left Egypt?
The boys and girls look at each other questioningly. Many of them begin to turn red in the face with embarrassment. After the silence persists for a few more moments, Matthews breaks it and provides his own answer.
Matthews: Children, please, I beg of you. Please try and remember what we talk about here in Sunday school. Otherwise, you can’t hope to talk to your parents about any questions you might have about what we talk about here. But, regardless, let’s move on.
Matthews uses his pointer finger to find the exact line on his marked Bible page that he seeks to read from.
Matthews: Well, after Moses was granted the power from God to part the Red Sea, he led the Israelites over the path that was cleared to the opposite shore. Pharoah and his pursuing army were washed away once God closed the path, and many drowned. As a result, Moses and the rest of God’s chosen people were free.
“For the next forty years, Moses governed the people as they wandered throughout the desert in search of the Promised Land. For a time, they were also camped around Mount Sinai. During this time, God set forth to Moses two different sets of laws that detailed the way in which he wished his people would live and honor him properly. The more popular and well-known is the Ten Commandments, which laid out the basic moral code that we as Christians need to live by. No adultery, gambling, honoring thy father and mother, no murdering your fellow man, no stealing others’ possessions, not growing envious of others, and the like.”
Matthews pauses for a second, and reaches into his suit jacket pocket. He pulls out a handkerchief and wipes his mouth before continuing.
Matthews: But, the Ten Commandments, as I’ve said, boys and girls, only covered the basics. In order to truly make sure that the Israelites had a guide to pass their laws as time passed, God helped Moses compile the book of Leviticus. Leviticus was far more detailed, and covered any number of topics that included ritual, the proper way to sacrifice animals to please the Lord God, the proper qualifications needed to take part in the priesthood, any number of things that were deemed unclean, how to properly atone for your past sins and misdeeds, the punishments that came with various crimes, and on general holiness.
Matthews looks over the children again. One of the boys raises his hand, wishing to ask a question. The pastor points to the boy.
Boy: But, pastor, why did God need to give Moses so many laws?
Matthews: Well, son, it’s quite simple. As humans, we are God’s finest and most favorite of all his creatures. We have the ability to think, we can love, we can create art, and are generally capable of so much beauty and good things at our finest. Yet….
Matthews closes the Bible abruptly. He then slams it on the table. One of the little girls screams and crawls underneath the table in fear.
Matthews: As humans, time and time again, we’ve proven that we aren’t worthy of God’s love and the gift of life that he has given each and every one of us. We lie, we cheat, we steal, we kill. Basically, everything that he has wished us not to do, we continue to repeat. This is why he felt the need to create so many rules. Because of our dubious inner natures, we cannot be trusted to properly honor him or to walk in the Way of the Cross.
By now, the young girl has gotten up from under the table and retaken her seat. She is still trembling slightly. Matthews has calmed down as well, and the same smile he had when he first greeted the children has returned.
Matthews: Unfortunately, children, that’s all the time we have for today. Make sure that you ask your parents plenty of questions about Leviticus, and maybe we can continue this discussion next week. But, for now, make sure that you go to the Fellowship Hall for together time with your parents before worship. The staff has made sure to have plenty of tasty treats for you young ones. I’ll see all of you next week.
The boys and girls begin to get up and file out of the room. All except for the little girl that was so frightened by the preacher’s outburst. Matthews slowly walks over to the girl, and puts a hand on her shoulder in an attempt to console her.
Matthews: Honey, what’s wrong?
The girl wipes a small tear away, and reaches into her pocket. She brings out a folded piece of red construction paper and hands it to Matthews. Matthews steps away and unfolds the paper to find a macaroni picture depicting the crucifixion of Jesus. Matthews is left speechless. He gets down on one knee, and embraces the girl for the gift. He then gives her a brief word of encouragement, and a small smile crosses her lips. She then heads on out of the door, following the other children.
Matthews then closes the door of the classroom. He then grabs a seat on top of the table and sits down, crossing his legs Indian style. He then reaches for his Bible and tosses it to Deacon Jeremiah.
Matthews: Alright, down to business. Jeremiah, if you will.
Jeremiah opens the Bible to the marked page and begins to read aloud.
Jeremiah: A reading from the book of Leviticus 18. “Thou shalt not like with mankind as with womankind: it is abomination.”
Jeremiah closes the book and the masked pastor begins to comment on it.
Matthews: So, after successfully dispatching the sinner Legion in a timely fashion, it appears that APW management has finally deemed me worthy to appear on the actual telecast. The mere fact that a competitor of my caliber couldn’t even have his first match televised is simply yet another display of the professional wrestling industry’s persecution of good, hard-working Christians. Nevertheless, this match on Monday Night Meltdown will be sure to steal the show.
“Quite the opponent I’ve been given in London Carter. He’s already a step up from Legion in the fact that he’s actually been able to win a match or two. But, he does share one similarity with Legion, the fact that he embodies everything that is wrong with man in the present day. Raised on the rough streets of Brooklyn, New York apparently gave you a reason to identify with the hip hop culture. Everything from your taste in music, to the overly gawdy amount of tattoos that cover your entire form, your affinity for the devil’s herb and the devil’s drink, and the disrespect of your mother to boot.”
“London, you are a walking how-to manual on how not to behave if you ever hope to reach the everlasting paradise of heaven. You have defiled your entire body, which God set forth in the Good Book for any man to treat as he would a temple that serves as a house of the Lord. It’s a true shame that fountain pens are no longer utilized, because with you around, you’d never have to worry about running out of ink.”
“I’ve dealt with those who have chosen to peddle addiction in the past, and they each met very grisly fates. None more so than Jose Fernandez. A model who used to moonlight as a Colombian cocaine kingpin, he decided to call my credentials as a holy man into question. Needless to say, he was forced to ingest the very substance he sold that no doubt caused the destruction of various families. And, at last year’s edition of PCW Anarchy, he was beaten so badly by me in a Tables, Ladders, and Chairs match that he was never heard from again anywhere in the professional wrestling industry. I will ensure that you share a similar fate, enough to make you think twice before you decide to roll another blunt or joint, pick up another bowl or blunt, or down another bottle of Ciroc.”
“But, the most egregious of your transgressions is outlined directly in the passage read by my associate, Deacon Jeremiah. Your lecherous and disgusting homosexual affinity for your ‘home boy’ Anthony Bailey might be cute to some, but to any normal, faithful, God-fearing Christian, it would rightly cause many waste baskets to fill with endless amounts of vomit. There is a reason why society has not declared that your kind should not be allowed to marry, and the proof is in the pudding. If outlawing homosexuality is good enough for the Israelites, it’s proven more than good enough for the Western world, which is heavily steeped in Judeo-Christian traditions.”
“Looking at your decision from even the most logical perspective is enough to show even you the fallacy of your ‘love.’ You will never be able to share the sacred right of marriage with the man that is the object of all of your affection. You will never be able to have children, the second most important aspect of our time spent here on Earth. And, your family line will more than likely turn to dust because of your lack of progeny, joining the likes of the many other heathen civilizations that chose to venerate your lifestyle. And, just like you, many others that support your agenda have decided to take up arms against me in the ring, and they have all failed. From my physical dominance of Rachel Robinson, to looking over the lifeless form of Mariah Lopez after I ruthlessly powerbombed her through a table, to the sight of Aurora Rose screaming in fear before I nearly sacrificed her to the Most High, your kind has always made some of the best targets for my ministry.”
“There may still be hope for you yet though, London. Take Deacon Jeremiah here.”
Jeremiah takes off his sunglasses and joins Matthews by his side.
Matthews: Jeremiah was a former gang banger in the local area. He did many horrible things, and engaged in a lifestyle that was very similar to yours, minus the homosexuality of course. One night, the deacon took part in a robbery with a good friend of his and two other men. After the job went successfully, Jeremiah was shot in the leg, thrown out of the getaway car, and left with the evidence planted on him. Betrayed in every sense of the word. Needless to say, I was a little surprised when he stumbled into my confessional that night. Yet, Jeremiah had an epiphany after we had a little discussion that we had, and came to terms with the fact that only he was to blame for the circumstances that had befallen him. As a result, I took him under my wing, and now he is a member of those that will be saved once God the Father decides to subject humanity to the fiery apocalypse that we all deserve. Isn’t that right Jeremiah?
Deacon Jeremiah nods his head, and puts his sunglasses back on.
Matthews: So, London, let me make you an offer. You clearly have talent, otherwise you wouldn’t be on the APW roster. You can prove yourself to be useful in the Lord’s ministry. But, before any of that could come to pass, you will have to renounce your feelings for your home boy, refrain from the use of cannabis and alcohol, and most importantly, make peace with your mother. You must come to terms with the fact that you, not God, are the one that deserves blame for any horrible thing that has ever befallen you. If you don’t, just like other countless billions of people, you will spend eternity in a fire pit, hounded by demons and Satan himself. So, think carefully, London. Because the bell is tolling, and it is tolling for you. The Word of the Lord, Thanks Be to God.
Matthews then gets up off of the table and joins hands with Jeremiah. They bow their heads for a moment of prayer, perhaps asking for London Carter to have the strength to renounce his various inner evils so that he may accept Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior. They both end their prayer with a collective “Amen” and cross themselves. They both leave the room and scene fades to black.
Yet, for all the joy and satisfaction that decimating Legion brought, the night can still only serve as a warning shot to the rest of the Monday Night Meltdown brand and the rest of APW as a whole. Legion was nothing more than yet another example of a false prophet, a man who has brainwashed himself into buying his own hype and competence, with very little reason to do so. This victory is nothing more than a stepping stone, the first stride down a road that is, as Robert Frost would call it, far less traveled. There will be many challenges, it cannot be doubted that APW has quite the roster. But, only one man will compete weekly with the kind of blessings imbued on him by God the Father himself. And that man is God’s chosen broadsword himself, Reverend Jerry Matthews, “The Evangelist.”
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Scene 1 – Birmingham First Baptist Church, Birmingham, Alabama – Present Day
The scene opens to a classroom in the basement of Birmingham First Baptist Church. The plain white walls are covered in a number of posters, some simply being portraits of Jesus Christ or some of the more famous prophets like Moses, Elijah or Samuel. Others depict some of the more epic deeds of the Bible’s most faithful Christians like David slaying Goliath with a well-placed stone to the forehead, King Solomon rendering his famous judgment on who the true mother of a child was, and Jesus and his disciples breaking bread during the Last Supper in the Upper Room.
In the middle of the room sits a small rectangular wooden table. Around the table sit a number of chairs, but the chairs are noticeably smaller than normal. The reason for this is explained by the chairs’ occupants, a number of young children each dressed in their Sunday best. The children range in age from about 5 to 7 years of age, and the boys are wearing plain white shirts and suspenders. The girls are all wearing full ankle-length dresses, with not a hint of skin showing. The children are sitting there silently, until the only door to the room opens.
Into the room walks the Reverend Jerry Matthews, with his spiritual liaison Deacon Jeremiah Robinson in tow. Matthews is wearing his trademark white cotton suit and black shirt, and the crucifix on his mask seems to be standing out more than usual. Deacon Jeremiah is wearing a black suit and white shirt as well as a pair of black Oakley sunglasses. The children look up and see the pair, and prop up immediately to attention. Matthews is carrying a Bible, which he sets down on the table. He then begins to address the class of children with a smile.
Matthews: Boys and girls, how was our week?
The boys and girls cheerfully reply to the preacher in unison.
Boys and Girls: Good, Pastor Matthews!!
Matthews: That’s good to hear children. I’m glad to see each and every one of your bright and shining faces on this day, the Lord’s day. No matter what, each of you should always remember your duty to dedicate Sunday to the Most High, because even he himself did so when he performed the ultimate labor in creating the world.
Matthews picks up his Bible off of the table. He flips to a certain page he had marked and then continues.
Matthews: Now, today we’re going to be learning about the book of Leviticus. For those of you that were here last week, can any of you tell me what happened to Moses and the Israelites after they left Egypt?
The boys and girls look at each other questioningly. Many of them begin to turn red in the face with embarrassment. After the silence persists for a few more moments, Matthews breaks it and provides his own answer.
Matthews: Children, please, I beg of you. Please try and remember what we talk about here in Sunday school. Otherwise, you can’t hope to talk to your parents about any questions you might have about what we talk about here. But, regardless, let’s move on.
Matthews uses his pointer finger to find the exact line on his marked Bible page that he seeks to read from.
Matthews: Well, after Moses was granted the power from God to part the Red Sea, he led the Israelites over the path that was cleared to the opposite shore. Pharoah and his pursuing army were washed away once God closed the path, and many drowned. As a result, Moses and the rest of God’s chosen people were free.
“For the next forty years, Moses governed the people as they wandered throughout the desert in search of the Promised Land. For a time, they were also camped around Mount Sinai. During this time, God set forth to Moses two different sets of laws that detailed the way in which he wished his people would live and honor him properly. The more popular and well-known is the Ten Commandments, which laid out the basic moral code that we as Christians need to live by. No adultery, gambling, honoring thy father and mother, no murdering your fellow man, no stealing others’ possessions, not growing envious of others, and the like.”
Matthews pauses for a second, and reaches into his suit jacket pocket. He pulls out a handkerchief and wipes his mouth before continuing.
Matthews: But, the Ten Commandments, as I’ve said, boys and girls, only covered the basics. In order to truly make sure that the Israelites had a guide to pass their laws as time passed, God helped Moses compile the book of Leviticus. Leviticus was far more detailed, and covered any number of topics that included ritual, the proper way to sacrifice animals to please the Lord God, the proper qualifications needed to take part in the priesthood, any number of things that were deemed unclean, how to properly atone for your past sins and misdeeds, the punishments that came with various crimes, and on general holiness.
Matthews looks over the children again. One of the boys raises his hand, wishing to ask a question. The pastor points to the boy.
Boy: But, pastor, why did God need to give Moses so many laws?
Matthews: Well, son, it’s quite simple. As humans, we are God’s finest and most favorite of all his creatures. We have the ability to think, we can love, we can create art, and are generally capable of so much beauty and good things at our finest. Yet….
Matthews closes the Bible abruptly. He then slams it on the table. One of the little girls screams and crawls underneath the table in fear.
Matthews: As humans, time and time again, we’ve proven that we aren’t worthy of God’s love and the gift of life that he has given each and every one of us. We lie, we cheat, we steal, we kill. Basically, everything that he has wished us not to do, we continue to repeat. This is why he felt the need to create so many rules. Because of our dubious inner natures, we cannot be trusted to properly honor him or to walk in the Way of the Cross.
By now, the young girl has gotten up from under the table and retaken her seat. She is still trembling slightly. Matthews has calmed down as well, and the same smile he had when he first greeted the children has returned.
Matthews: Unfortunately, children, that’s all the time we have for today. Make sure that you ask your parents plenty of questions about Leviticus, and maybe we can continue this discussion next week. But, for now, make sure that you go to the Fellowship Hall for together time with your parents before worship. The staff has made sure to have plenty of tasty treats for you young ones. I’ll see all of you next week.
The boys and girls begin to get up and file out of the room. All except for the little girl that was so frightened by the preacher’s outburst. Matthews slowly walks over to the girl, and puts a hand on her shoulder in an attempt to console her.
Matthews: Honey, what’s wrong?
The girl wipes a small tear away, and reaches into her pocket. She brings out a folded piece of red construction paper and hands it to Matthews. Matthews steps away and unfolds the paper to find a macaroni picture depicting the crucifixion of Jesus. Matthews is left speechless. He gets down on one knee, and embraces the girl for the gift. He then gives her a brief word of encouragement, and a small smile crosses her lips. She then heads on out of the door, following the other children.
Matthews then closes the door of the classroom. He then grabs a seat on top of the table and sits down, crossing his legs Indian style. He then reaches for his Bible and tosses it to Deacon Jeremiah.
Matthews: Alright, down to business. Jeremiah, if you will.
Jeremiah opens the Bible to the marked page and begins to read aloud.
Jeremiah: A reading from the book of Leviticus 18. “Thou shalt not like with mankind as with womankind: it is abomination.”
Jeremiah closes the book and the masked pastor begins to comment on it.
Matthews: So, after successfully dispatching the sinner Legion in a timely fashion, it appears that APW management has finally deemed me worthy to appear on the actual telecast. The mere fact that a competitor of my caliber couldn’t even have his first match televised is simply yet another display of the professional wrestling industry’s persecution of good, hard-working Christians. Nevertheless, this match on Monday Night Meltdown will be sure to steal the show.
“Quite the opponent I’ve been given in London Carter. He’s already a step up from Legion in the fact that he’s actually been able to win a match or two. But, he does share one similarity with Legion, the fact that he embodies everything that is wrong with man in the present day. Raised on the rough streets of Brooklyn, New York apparently gave you a reason to identify with the hip hop culture. Everything from your taste in music, to the overly gawdy amount of tattoos that cover your entire form, your affinity for the devil’s herb and the devil’s drink, and the disrespect of your mother to boot.”
“London, you are a walking how-to manual on how not to behave if you ever hope to reach the everlasting paradise of heaven. You have defiled your entire body, which God set forth in the Good Book for any man to treat as he would a temple that serves as a house of the Lord. It’s a true shame that fountain pens are no longer utilized, because with you around, you’d never have to worry about running out of ink.”
“I’ve dealt with those who have chosen to peddle addiction in the past, and they each met very grisly fates. None more so than Jose Fernandez. A model who used to moonlight as a Colombian cocaine kingpin, he decided to call my credentials as a holy man into question. Needless to say, he was forced to ingest the very substance he sold that no doubt caused the destruction of various families. And, at last year’s edition of PCW Anarchy, he was beaten so badly by me in a Tables, Ladders, and Chairs match that he was never heard from again anywhere in the professional wrestling industry. I will ensure that you share a similar fate, enough to make you think twice before you decide to roll another blunt or joint, pick up another bowl or blunt, or down another bottle of Ciroc.”
“But, the most egregious of your transgressions is outlined directly in the passage read by my associate, Deacon Jeremiah. Your lecherous and disgusting homosexual affinity for your ‘home boy’ Anthony Bailey might be cute to some, but to any normal, faithful, God-fearing Christian, it would rightly cause many waste baskets to fill with endless amounts of vomit. There is a reason why society has not declared that your kind should not be allowed to marry, and the proof is in the pudding. If outlawing homosexuality is good enough for the Israelites, it’s proven more than good enough for the Western world, which is heavily steeped in Judeo-Christian traditions.”
“Looking at your decision from even the most logical perspective is enough to show even you the fallacy of your ‘love.’ You will never be able to share the sacred right of marriage with the man that is the object of all of your affection. You will never be able to have children, the second most important aspect of our time spent here on Earth. And, your family line will more than likely turn to dust because of your lack of progeny, joining the likes of the many other heathen civilizations that chose to venerate your lifestyle. And, just like you, many others that support your agenda have decided to take up arms against me in the ring, and they have all failed. From my physical dominance of Rachel Robinson, to looking over the lifeless form of Mariah Lopez after I ruthlessly powerbombed her through a table, to the sight of Aurora Rose screaming in fear before I nearly sacrificed her to the Most High, your kind has always made some of the best targets for my ministry.”
“There may still be hope for you yet though, London. Take Deacon Jeremiah here.”
Jeremiah takes off his sunglasses and joins Matthews by his side.
Matthews: Jeremiah was a former gang banger in the local area. He did many horrible things, and engaged in a lifestyle that was very similar to yours, minus the homosexuality of course. One night, the deacon took part in a robbery with a good friend of his and two other men. After the job went successfully, Jeremiah was shot in the leg, thrown out of the getaway car, and left with the evidence planted on him. Betrayed in every sense of the word. Needless to say, I was a little surprised when he stumbled into my confessional that night. Yet, Jeremiah had an epiphany after we had a little discussion that we had, and came to terms with the fact that only he was to blame for the circumstances that had befallen him. As a result, I took him under my wing, and now he is a member of those that will be saved once God the Father decides to subject humanity to the fiery apocalypse that we all deserve. Isn’t that right Jeremiah?
Deacon Jeremiah nods his head, and puts his sunglasses back on.
Matthews: So, London, let me make you an offer. You clearly have talent, otherwise you wouldn’t be on the APW roster. You can prove yourself to be useful in the Lord’s ministry. But, before any of that could come to pass, you will have to renounce your feelings for your home boy, refrain from the use of cannabis and alcohol, and most importantly, make peace with your mother. You must come to terms with the fact that you, not God, are the one that deserves blame for any horrible thing that has ever befallen you. If you don’t, just like other countless billions of people, you will spend eternity in a fire pit, hounded by demons and Satan himself. So, think carefully, London. Because the bell is tolling, and it is tolling for you. The Word of the Lord, Thanks Be to God.
Matthews then gets up off of the table and joins hands with Jeremiah. They bow their heads for a moment of prayer, perhaps asking for London Carter to have the strength to renounce his various inner evils so that he may accept Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior. They both end their prayer with a collective “Amen” and cross themselves. They both leave the room and scene fades to black.
