Post by The Red Scorpion on Jun 3, 2013 11:58:09 GMT -4
Hannah Storm: Come on you guys, stop!
The interviewer stands surrounded by three Oakland thugs, who are busy tossing her purse around, playing “keep away” with it as the interviewer tries to take her property back. The three men laugh and continue their fun, even as Storm trips on her heels and falls to the ground. Storm looks up with frustration as the men go through her belongings and then drop the purse when they’re done.
Oakland Thug: Next time next week, Hannah?
Hannah: Yeah, yeah, sure…whatever.
The thugs all spit on the ground next to Storm and walk off as Hannah picks herself up and wipes the dirt off her blouse. She scoops up her purse and sighs before turning around, coming face-to-face with The Red Scorpion, who is relaxing on the hood of a nearby car.
Red Scorpion: Best friends you’ve ever had in your life, Hannah?
Storm rolls her eyes at the smug expression across the masked youths face, and his tone is no better. She tries to ignore him as she fixes her shoes, but The Red Scorpion is not one to notice he is unwelcome.
Red Scorpion: You’re needed. Needed to help me send a message to Meltdown and Butterface.
Hannah: An interview, you mean? Maybe later, after I’ve cleaned up. You can use the time to get ready.
Red Scorpion: Who’s to say I’m not ready? I’m the APW Revolution Champion, totally undefeated and—
Having slid off the car’s hood and approached the interviewer with his title belt in hand, Scorpion is pushed away by Storm.
Hannah: Pretty sure I saw you lose last week. If I were you, I’d take a moment to accept that and be, you know, a bit more humble. Especially if you want to make the jump to Overdrive or Asylum. The last thing those brands need is another smug weasel who thinks he’s the greatest gift to wrestling…
Red Scorpion: If you’re referring to last week in my match with…Emmy…then you should take a second look. He cheated. That’s the only way you can beat a winner. Plain and simple. Furthermore, what the other shows need means nothing to me! Typical girl talk, haha.
Storm spins around and storms up to Scorpion.
Hannah: EXCUSE ME?!
She smacks the Revolution Championship out of his hand, causing the belt to clatter onto the pavement. Red Scorpion gasps weakly, in shock, as he looks at Storm with a stunned expression.
Hannah: Next time I’ll hit you. You’ve been hurting a lot of staff members around here lately “defending” that hunk of junk you call a “title”. My friends.
Red Scorpion: I’m the Revolution Champion! Sienna Harrison will hear about this! You-You’ll be put in the r-ring to wrestle me, in-in-in-stead of Butterfa—
The interviewer responds by slapping Scorpion right across the face.
Red Scorpion: Ahhh, Mommy! I mean…ahhhh….
Scorpion holds his masked cheek and stares in horror at Hannah, who just shakes her head at him.
Hannah: I pray you give a full report of this to Miss Harrison. I hope she switches me out for all your opponents. But until then, I suggest you get your ducks in a row, Red, and reconsider what you intent to do in APW before you progress any further. Maybe start with Catherine Jewel, and how much SHE deserves over yourself. That’s what I’d call being a Revolution Champion, and that’s what I’d say is the mark of a winner. Get in front of the camera in your mother’s basement, congratulate Emerald Assassin, and welcome Catherine Jewel to the fold. Tell her you look forward to a fair, clean, and competitive match that you don’t concern yourself with concerning who wins! Do you understand what I’m telling to you, kid?
Red Scorpion: I’m the Revolution Champion, I don’t have to take—
Hannah responds by slapping Scorpion across the other cheek, causing him to whimper and stumble back. The mere shock of being hit so hard unexpectedly by such a small figure leads Scorpion to not respond with violence himself.
Hannah: Do you. Understand. Me. Kid?
Red Scorpion: I…I…
He leans down and picks up his title belt before backing away nervously as Hannah stares him down icily. The Red Scorpion now hurries off, dismayed. A Meltdown staff member approaches Hannah, having witnessed the whole affair, and whistles in an impressed way.
Staff: Wooooow, I did not see that one coming…
Hannah just shrugs modestly.
Hannah: Score one for women’s rights.
Staff: But, uh, he probably won’t let that go, you know. Little tyke’s got some kind of agenda cooking under that mask of his.
Hannah: Oh I hope he does remember it, and I hope he tries to use the emotion it makes him feel in every match he wrestles from here on out. And then I hope Catherine Jewel pummels him further because of it. If that doesn’t get the job done and break that ego…I’m sure Emerald Assassin will.
Staff: …You’re kind different, aren’t you, Hannah?
The interviewer shrugs again.
Hannah: Meh. I just wanted to give interviewers the world over a win. I wouldn’t have tried that on anyone else around here…
The staff member chuckles in surprise as Hannah shoulders her purse and walks toward the arena. Meanwhile, the cameras catch up with Red Scorpion, who is fastening the Revolution Championship around his waist. He is still shaking a bit from the slaps he received from Hannah Storm, but the young competitor is doing his best to brush off the abuse he suffered as he walks and talks alone.
Red Scorpion: Ha, ha, so that’s the strength of a woman. Har…hardly felt a thing…ow…
He pops his jaw a bit as he rubs it and grimaces.
Red Scorpion: But enough about her. She doesn’t know anything about being talented, undefeated greatness. And for that matter, neither does that butterface, Catherine Jewel! I’ve beaten hundreds of men to defend this title. All she’s done is…is BE with hundreds of men. Yeah, yeah that’s it! I should use that…I bet that’s how she got this job. Well I’ll show her that this is the big leagues, that this is the Red Scorpion’s den! And then I’ll manhandle that cheater Emmy. He’ll see that I’m coming for him after I’ve left that butterface sprawled out in the middle of the ring in front of everyone. I’ll embarrass him twice as hard as he embarrassed me.
Scorpion snickers behind his mask, having recovered his confidence after being hit by a girl. He snatches an unopened bottle of water off a nearby table and drinks from it.
Red Scorpion: Ahhh, Dasani! It’s as refreshing as the dominance I’ll show this week. It’s the kind of display that’ll get me noticed, and off this abusive nest of cheaters and champion-strikers.
He downs more water and “mmmm’s” in satisfaction. Just then, he hears chatter from around the corner.
Woman #1: Oh I LOVE her! She has such a pretty face.
Woman #2: I know, but have you seen how talented she is? I got a look at some of her training tapes, that girl’s going to be something in this company!
Red Scorpion: Hmmm, I wonder who they’re discussing…
Scorpion rounds the corner to find two women watching a televised bit on Catherine Jewel, seemingly admiring the new APW talent as she smiles on the TV screen. Red Scorpion unwraps his Revolution Championship from around his waist and smiles.
Red Scorpion: Good afternoon, my adoring fans. I see you’re discussing my opponent, the butterface Catherine Jewel.
The women exchange irritated looks at the young pompous Red Scorpion as he hoists his title in the air.
Red Scorpion: My mother’s always told me it’s not about looks, which is why I wear the mask, but I see now that she was mostly talking about people like Jewel. She wants to wrestle despite not having the looks for it, and most people would let her. Too bad I…am not most people. Would you care to wrestle with me, ladies?
Woman #1: Heck no.
Woman #2: Yeah, get lost, you little cretin.
Red Scorpion: I am no “cretin”. I am a scorpion. And my question was more rhetorical than anything. Prepare yourselves to fight me.
Woman #1: We’re makeup ladies, you dweeb! We’re not wrestlers, so take that nonsense elsewhere.
Scorpion sets aside his Revolution Championship and chuckles.
Red Scorpion: The butterface Jewel is not a wrestler either. She’s just some baby mama bringing an embarrassing tale to a place with no interest. She is every women's cliche in one, but I am the real deal. She is merely Lifetime, television for women, and I am AMC, HBO, Showtime, FX, you name all the good channels, that's me.
The women exchange nervous looks as Scorpion pulls on some wrestling gloves.
Red Scorpion: Don’t worry, I won’t sting you both too hard. It’s just I haven’t defended my title in a good hour, and that’s one hour too long without me winning.
Scorpion promptly charges the woman and dropkicks both of them at the same time. They crash into the makeup stands with a scream and Scorpion pounces further. He grabs one of them and delivers the Scorpion Plex! He then jumps up and grabs the other and locks her in the Scorpion’s Sting…right as he props his feet up onto the other woman. The red-suited referee appears out of nowhere and makes the count for the champion
1
.
.
.
2
.
.
.
3!!!
Referee: Here is your winner, and STILL Revolution Champion…RED…SCOOOOOORPIOOOOOOOON!!!
Red Scorpion: Now make sure she taps out!!
Yelling at the referee, Scorpion tightens his Scorpion’s Sting submission on the makeup lady. The lady, not a wrestler as stated before, has already passed out from the pain of the dropkick into the table, and the referee makes it clear as he “signals” for the “bell."
Referee: K-O! Here is your winner, ONCE AGAIN, and STILL the Revolution Champion…REEEEEED SCOOOOOOOOOOOORPIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!!
Scorpion slithers up to his feet and takes his title from the referee. He hoists it up triumphantly into the air.
Red Scorpion: I remain undefeated!!
He spins around and looks upon the TV screen, where Catherine Jewel is still smiling, and he kicks the TV over, causing it to break upon the floor.
Red Scorpion: You’re next, you paper-bag deserving witch!
He then stares at his masked reflection in the Revolution Championship, smiling with full-fledged confidence.
Red Scorpion: And then I’ll have the rest of them pinned! For in the words of the great Teddy Roosevelt, “Don't hit at all if it is honorably possible to avoid hitting; but never hit soft.” Scorpions do not dwell on honor, and Meltdown leaves me with little reason to avoid hitting. I shall hit them all! HARD!!
The Red Scorpion’s work done, he slides off-screen as the camera focuses on the battered makeup ladies and fades to black.
The interviewer stands surrounded by three Oakland thugs, who are busy tossing her purse around, playing “keep away” with it as the interviewer tries to take her property back. The three men laugh and continue their fun, even as Storm trips on her heels and falls to the ground. Storm looks up with frustration as the men go through her belongings and then drop the purse when they’re done.
Oakland Thug: Next time next week, Hannah?
Hannah: Yeah, yeah, sure…whatever.
The thugs all spit on the ground next to Storm and walk off as Hannah picks herself up and wipes the dirt off her blouse. She scoops up her purse and sighs before turning around, coming face-to-face with The Red Scorpion, who is relaxing on the hood of a nearby car.
Red Scorpion: Best friends you’ve ever had in your life, Hannah?
Storm rolls her eyes at the smug expression across the masked youths face, and his tone is no better. She tries to ignore him as she fixes her shoes, but The Red Scorpion is not one to notice he is unwelcome.
Red Scorpion: You’re needed. Needed to help me send a message to Meltdown and Butterface.
Hannah: An interview, you mean? Maybe later, after I’ve cleaned up. You can use the time to get ready.
Red Scorpion: Who’s to say I’m not ready? I’m the APW Revolution Champion, totally undefeated and—
Having slid off the car’s hood and approached the interviewer with his title belt in hand, Scorpion is pushed away by Storm.
Hannah: Pretty sure I saw you lose last week. If I were you, I’d take a moment to accept that and be, you know, a bit more humble. Especially if you want to make the jump to Overdrive or Asylum. The last thing those brands need is another smug weasel who thinks he’s the greatest gift to wrestling…
Red Scorpion: If you’re referring to last week in my match with…Emmy…then you should take a second look. He cheated. That’s the only way you can beat a winner. Plain and simple. Furthermore, what the other shows need means nothing to me! Typical girl talk, haha.
Storm spins around and storms up to Scorpion.
Hannah: EXCUSE ME?!
She smacks the Revolution Championship out of his hand, causing the belt to clatter onto the pavement. Red Scorpion gasps weakly, in shock, as he looks at Storm with a stunned expression.
Hannah: Next time I’ll hit you. You’ve been hurting a lot of staff members around here lately “defending” that hunk of junk you call a “title”. My friends.
Red Scorpion: I’m the Revolution Champion! Sienna Harrison will hear about this! You-You’ll be put in the r-ring to wrestle me, in-in-in-stead of Butterfa—
The interviewer responds by slapping Scorpion right across the face.
Red Scorpion: Ahhh, Mommy! I mean…ahhhh….
Scorpion holds his masked cheek and stares in horror at Hannah, who just shakes her head at him.
Hannah: I pray you give a full report of this to Miss Harrison. I hope she switches me out for all your opponents. But until then, I suggest you get your ducks in a row, Red, and reconsider what you intent to do in APW before you progress any further. Maybe start with Catherine Jewel, and how much SHE deserves over yourself. That’s what I’d call being a Revolution Champion, and that’s what I’d say is the mark of a winner. Get in front of the camera in your mother’s basement, congratulate Emerald Assassin, and welcome Catherine Jewel to the fold. Tell her you look forward to a fair, clean, and competitive match that you don’t concern yourself with concerning who wins! Do you understand what I’m telling to you, kid?
Red Scorpion: I’m the Revolution Champion, I don’t have to take—
Hannah responds by slapping Scorpion across the other cheek, causing him to whimper and stumble back. The mere shock of being hit so hard unexpectedly by such a small figure leads Scorpion to not respond with violence himself.
Hannah: Do you. Understand. Me. Kid?
Red Scorpion: I…I…
He leans down and picks up his title belt before backing away nervously as Hannah stares him down icily. The Red Scorpion now hurries off, dismayed. A Meltdown staff member approaches Hannah, having witnessed the whole affair, and whistles in an impressed way.
Staff: Wooooow, I did not see that one coming…
Hannah just shrugs modestly.
Hannah: Score one for women’s rights.
Staff: But, uh, he probably won’t let that go, you know. Little tyke’s got some kind of agenda cooking under that mask of his.
Hannah: Oh I hope he does remember it, and I hope he tries to use the emotion it makes him feel in every match he wrestles from here on out. And then I hope Catherine Jewel pummels him further because of it. If that doesn’t get the job done and break that ego…I’m sure Emerald Assassin will.
Staff: …You’re kind different, aren’t you, Hannah?
The interviewer shrugs again.
Hannah: Meh. I just wanted to give interviewers the world over a win. I wouldn’t have tried that on anyone else around here…
The staff member chuckles in surprise as Hannah shoulders her purse and walks toward the arena. Meanwhile, the cameras catch up with Red Scorpion, who is fastening the Revolution Championship around his waist. He is still shaking a bit from the slaps he received from Hannah Storm, but the young competitor is doing his best to brush off the abuse he suffered as he walks and talks alone.
Red Scorpion: Ha, ha, so that’s the strength of a woman. Har…hardly felt a thing…ow…
He pops his jaw a bit as he rubs it and grimaces.
Red Scorpion: But enough about her. She doesn’t know anything about being talented, undefeated greatness. And for that matter, neither does that butterface, Catherine Jewel! I’ve beaten hundreds of men to defend this title. All she’s done is…is BE with hundreds of men. Yeah, yeah that’s it! I should use that…I bet that’s how she got this job. Well I’ll show her that this is the big leagues, that this is the Red Scorpion’s den! And then I’ll manhandle that cheater Emmy. He’ll see that I’m coming for him after I’ve left that butterface sprawled out in the middle of the ring in front of everyone. I’ll embarrass him twice as hard as he embarrassed me.
Scorpion snickers behind his mask, having recovered his confidence after being hit by a girl. He snatches an unopened bottle of water off a nearby table and drinks from it.
Red Scorpion: Ahhh, Dasani! It’s as refreshing as the dominance I’ll show this week. It’s the kind of display that’ll get me noticed, and off this abusive nest of cheaters and champion-strikers.
He downs more water and “mmmm’s” in satisfaction. Just then, he hears chatter from around the corner.
Woman #1: Oh I LOVE her! She has such a pretty face.
Woman #2: I know, but have you seen how talented she is? I got a look at some of her training tapes, that girl’s going to be something in this company!
Red Scorpion: Hmmm, I wonder who they’re discussing…
Scorpion rounds the corner to find two women watching a televised bit on Catherine Jewel, seemingly admiring the new APW talent as she smiles on the TV screen. Red Scorpion unwraps his Revolution Championship from around his waist and smiles.
Red Scorpion: Good afternoon, my adoring fans. I see you’re discussing my opponent, the butterface Catherine Jewel.
The women exchange irritated looks at the young pompous Red Scorpion as he hoists his title in the air.
Red Scorpion: My mother’s always told me it’s not about looks, which is why I wear the mask, but I see now that she was mostly talking about people like Jewel. She wants to wrestle despite not having the looks for it, and most people would let her. Too bad I…am not most people. Would you care to wrestle with me, ladies?
Woman #1: Heck no.
Woman #2: Yeah, get lost, you little cretin.
Red Scorpion: I am no “cretin”. I am a scorpion. And my question was more rhetorical than anything. Prepare yourselves to fight me.
Woman #1: We’re makeup ladies, you dweeb! We’re not wrestlers, so take that nonsense elsewhere.
Scorpion sets aside his Revolution Championship and chuckles.
Red Scorpion: The butterface Jewel is not a wrestler either. She’s just some baby mama bringing an embarrassing tale to a place with no interest. She is every women's cliche in one, but I am the real deal. She is merely Lifetime, television for women, and I am AMC, HBO, Showtime, FX, you name all the good channels, that's me.
The women exchange nervous looks as Scorpion pulls on some wrestling gloves.
Red Scorpion: Don’t worry, I won’t sting you both too hard. It’s just I haven’t defended my title in a good hour, and that’s one hour too long without me winning.
Scorpion promptly charges the woman and dropkicks both of them at the same time. They crash into the makeup stands with a scream and Scorpion pounces further. He grabs one of them and delivers the Scorpion Plex! He then jumps up and grabs the other and locks her in the Scorpion’s Sting…right as he props his feet up onto the other woman. The red-suited referee appears out of nowhere and makes the count for the champion
1
.
.
.
2
.
.
.
3!!!
Referee: Here is your winner, and STILL Revolution Champion…RED…SCOOOOOORPIOOOOOOOON!!!
Red Scorpion: Now make sure she taps out!!
Yelling at the referee, Scorpion tightens his Scorpion’s Sting submission on the makeup lady. The lady, not a wrestler as stated before, has already passed out from the pain of the dropkick into the table, and the referee makes it clear as he “signals” for the “bell."
Referee: K-O! Here is your winner, ONCE AGAIN, and STILL the Revolution Champion…REEEEEED SCOOOOOOOOOOOORPIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!!
Scorpion slithers up to his feet and takes his title from the referee. He hoists it up triumphantly into the air.
Red Scorpion: I remain undefeated!!
He spins around and looks upon the TV screen, where Catherine Jewel is still smiling, and he kicks the TV over, causing it to break upon the floor.
Red Scorpion: You’re next, you paper-bag deserving witch!
He then stares at his masked reflection in the Revolution Championship, smiling with full-fledged confidence.
Red Scorpion: And then I’ll have the rest of them pinned! For in the words of the great Teddy Roosevelt, “Don't hit at all if it is honorably possible to avoid hitting; but never hit soft.” Scorpions do not dwell on honor, and Meltdown leaves me with little reason to avoid hitting. I shall hit them all! HARD!!
The Red Scorpion’s work done, he slides off-screen as the camera focuses on the battered makeup ladies and fades to black.
