Post by Chaos Stryke on Jul 27, 2013 17:56:05 GMT -4
I think I’m losing something here… I’m not quite sure what at the moment. Just like my equilibrium is off. I do the things that I always do, and do them they way I usually do them… but it all feels wrong somehow. For the last month I’ve noticed that clearly. When I think back earlier, I think it was even like that then too, just not as bad. Yet despite all of that, I’ve been able to come through well in everything I’ve done… for the most part. I’ve come up short in a couple of encounters recently. I’ve made some questionable choices as of late too.
It feels like I’m starting to lose control… Even worse though, I no longer feel anchored anymore either. I haven’t seen or heard from Christian. Terry and I have always been distant. Aubrey was more of the self appointed go between. And Aubrey… I feel like I’ve lost everything that was meaningful between us as well… All the damage I’ve done to her has also been inflicted upon me as well. For the first time in a while… I’m on my own. I can’t really wrap my head around it at the moment. It shouldn’t bother me though.
For years I’ve battled alone. Sure I’ve had partners and stablemates, people that I’ve worked alongside, created bonds and friendships with, gone on to have great success with… but I always knew those things would be temporary. They were never meant to last. Now though… I can’t say that I feel the same.
On top of all that… I have reason to believe that Aubrey… that she might be working against me. Naturally it’s only to be expected. I put a knife in her back. She’d put on in mind. The difference is she’ll give her knife several twists. I don’t know what her ends will be in this game… I can only suspect that the final result will not be pretty when all is said and done.
If that were everything though, I might be able to figure out how to handle this. Maybe I could come up with a solution and avoid the endgame. Maybe I’d be able to emerge triumphant and even fix what has happened. But it’s not. Instead, I discovered that I am horribly compromised… beyond what I could’ve anticipated.
Monday, July 22, 2013…
We open to the first scene of Logan on camera at home in over a month. The Tap Out champion is seated in his study, with a folder laid out on the desk before him, as the camera moves into the room behind him. Logan appears to be sitting there brooding over the folder’s contents, looking quite disappointed. He doesn’t seem to notice the camera behind him.
What’s wrong?
He’s startled slightly by the sudden question, and turns to look at the camera and the person holding it. Relaxing slightly, he turns his back to the camera again.
Is it really that obvious?
Well, I do know you about as well as anybody can. You’ve been through a whole lot as of late but you at least seemed to be handling the load. I know that you’ve got a tough test in front of you for this week. Facing a handicap match is never an easy proposition. I know you did well in the one you faced on Meltdown, but that was also different circumstances. Despite all of that though, you seemed prepared, you looked focused, you were ready.
There’s a pause, waiting for a reply. Which doesn’t come.
Something changed in the last twenty four hours… something that has shaken your resolve from you. I know that you’ve met with your doctor as well earlier today, and you’ve been subdued ever since.
Logan sighs softly.
One day I’ll realize that I cannot hide any secrets from you.
He turns and looks back at her.
He gave me my test results and they were… bad.
Bad? How so?
He looks at the camera.
I’d rather not go into specifics here.
Oh.
He lowers his gaze to the floor and there’s an uneasy silence that seems to stretch.
You know… one thing I liked to pride myself on is the fact that regardless of the situation or circumstances I find myself in, I always felt in control. I was able to handle whatever was placed in front of me. Today though… I think I totally lost it.
The doctor showed me the results, gave me his diagnosis, and told me what it meant… and I snapped at him. I can’t recall any time I’d ever done that to him, regardless of what I was going through. That wasn’t the end of it though. He then gave me his recommendation based on my ‘condition’. I was frustrated by what he’d told me before… but I was outright angry then. It was a bit of a haze then, but I’m pretty sure I had some choice words for him and I distinctly remembered seeing a mug of hot coffee explode.
He looks up at the camera slowly.
It took me a while to process that I had in fact hurled it from his desk into the far wall, scaring the heck out of one of his staff members out in the hallway.
You… did that?
He nods slightly and seems a little shaken as he recalls those events.
I’m pretty sure I did… I can’t remember exactly doing it, but I can say that I certainly appeared to be in the right position to look like the responsible party. I needed about fifteen minutes alone after that to calm back down and get myself under control… I felt so ashamed afterwards too.
It seemed so… justified in the moment, but when I’d calmed down, I couldn’t understand why I’d done that.
What was his recommendation? That seems to have been what upset you.
Logan frowns slightly before he replies.
Withdraw from in ring competition for three months. He suspects that I’ve been suffering from this problem for two to three months and that every match I’ve had has steadily compounded the problem. He also suggested that I seek some psychological therapy after seeing the mood swing.
Again, there’s another silence as all this is taken in.
The only thing that happened in that time span was… your match with the Dying Breed. Where you broke your ribs…
… and apparently a few other things that were missed as well.
Well, you’re not going to be competing while in this condition are you?
He looks away from the camera again.
I’m not forfeiting any matches or my championship. At the moment, I’m contractually obligated to compete until the Shockwave pay per view. Until that point all of my matches are going to happen. After that, I don’t know.
But that’s at least three more matches! Considering who you’re facing this week, you might not make it to the next two matches if you’re hurt.
I will find a way to get through this. I’ve come this far already with this problem. I’ll figure something out… and I’d like you to help me with that.
She lets out a sound of derision from behind the camera.
You know that I’m not going to agree with you.
Logan turns and looks back towards her.
First, we’ll shut off the camera, then I tell you everything, and after that we can figure out how to make this work.
We’ll see.
The scene fades to black.
Saturday, July 27, 2013…
We open inside a darkened room with a single occupant sitting in a chair before the camera, who’s illuminated well enough to be seen clearly, head bowed so that the camera only can see the top of the head of the chair’s occupant. The head slowly raises up to face the camera and we see the person is wearing a mask. It’s black and white and is a mix of shapes and patterns following no rhyme or reason. We can see the wearer eyes, underside of their nose, and mouth. When they speak, it’s clearly the voice of Logan Alexander though.
I admit that this mask looks a little silly, but it’s something I’m going to need for the next few weeks to help deal with my problem. Considering this week I may very well end up being used as a punching bag, I figured I could use some extra protection where it matters most. I’ve gotten a bit more wild and unstable in recent weeks, and now I have to get used to competing with this headpiece on once again. The things that I’m willing to go through for my pride and reputation are mind boggling at times.
He shakes his head slightly
It took a while to get everyone on board for this, but now having reached a consensus, I’m ready to go forward and do what needs to be done for myself personally and professionally.
First and foremost that is going to involve stepping into the ring with one of the most impressive up and coming tag teams in APW right now. Of course what also factors into this equation is the fact that it’s a solo handicap match that may in fact have been engineered by my former tag team partner. Yeah, you heard that right former partner. Until I know what her designs are, I simply cannot put faith in the fact that Aubrey’s decisions are for the best. I’ve given her reason to settle a score, and now I’ll just have to deal with it.
Logan lets out a breath and focuses his attention right on the camera.
Enough about my partner though. I need to focus on the Unforgiven, APW’s newest puppet show if you ask me. The puppet masters pull on the strings and tell them to dance, Blood and Sentinel go out there and do just that, whenever and wherever they are told to. You guys are so used to that role that you’ve even allowed Aubrey to manipulate you into fulfilling her desires this week. Blood suggested that fits the role of being a mercenary. To that I also have to point out that’s also the role of a tool. To be used for all it’s worth and then be discarded. I guess we’ll see soon enough which role you two boys end up being in when all is said and done.
I’ll say here that all things considered, you two boys are walking into this contest with a sizable advantage. You have a numbers advantage. You have no potential outside concerns to deal with. I’m fighting alone against a very proficient tag team. I can’t honestly look back at any point in my career and see a point where this kind of match would ever be favourable to me. I’m not a dominant competitor in any regard. This match might just require dominance on my part in order to beat you two.
But in that admission is one of my strengths, the ability to acknowledge my own weaknesses and thereby allow me to address the ways in which I compensate for them and minimize them. I know that I’m not going to win this match based on my submission skills. I know that if I grab one of you in order to break them in two, which is easy under most circumstances, your partner will come in lay me out and that will pretty much be it. Quite simply that means that all of the preparation that you’ve undergone for this match is pretty much meaningless. You’ve prepared to face a submission master, but unless I’ve neutralized one of you completely, I can’t expect a submission attempt to ever be successful.
Logan shrugs his shoulder slightly, seeming unconcerned with that potential difficulty.
So maybe I don’t impress either of you boys, but I’m not here to win your praise or respect or make you fear me. Instead I’m going to go out and throw out the most unexpected and unorthodox approach I can just for you two. You two seem to be expecting me to come out with a nice and orderly, mat based, technically oriented approach befitting a submission master, but instead you’re going to get chaos. You may very well end up dealing with a faster passed, high impact offence, where I can knock you senseless and score a quick pin before your partner can get through the ropes to save you from disappointment.
He smirks slightly.
Having watched you two compete, checking your records, I know that Sentinel is the better, more dangerous opponent. Blood is the unchecked arrogance that gets his side into trouble more often than not. I gathered that just by listening to him for a couple of minutes. You two are good, but you’re overconfident for no good reason. That’s why you are standing before me now as ‘also ran’s rather than as Tag Team champions. You can make whatever excuses you desire, but the simple fact is that you weren’t up to the challenge.
One thing you need to be aware of is the fact that despite your stated goals for this match… you’re going to fail at them. I can guarantee that I’m going to walk out of this match having taken all that you can throw at me, and by the next time I fight in the ring, all you tried to do will be a distant memory, because there will be no lasting effects. Even if I lose, I’ll still be the Tap Out champion and you two will still just be a team that couldn’t win when it mattered, and only beat a weakened champion in a handicap match. No matter what happens, I am the winner, and you two accomplish nothing. You gain nothing. You prove nothing.
Logan looks quite confident, as he slowly stands to address the camera on last time.
Regardless of what you do, and what you think you accomplish in this match… it’s all meaningless. Think on that before we face off tomorrow, and then we’ll find out what you’re really made of, and if you’re anywhere near as good as all your chatter leads us to believe. In that regard, I believe the world is prepared to be disappointed.
See you tomorrow.
He wave casually to the camera and steps out of the field of view. The lights flicker and go out. The scene goes to black.
It feels like I’m starting to lose control… Even worse though, I no longer feel anchored anymore either. I haven’t seen or heard from Christian. Terry and I have always been distant. Aubrey was more of the self appointed go between. And Aubrey… I feel like I’ve lost everything that was meaningful between us as well… All the damage I’ve done to her has also been inflicted upon me as well. For the first time in a while… I’m on my own. I can’t really wrap my head around it at the moment. It shouldn’t bother me though.
For years I’ve battled alone. Sure I’ve had partners and stablemates, people that I’ve worked alongside, created bonds and friendships with, gone on to have great success with… but I always knew those things would be temporary. They were never meant to last. Now though… I can’t say that I feel the same.
On top of all that… I have reason to believe that Aubrey… that she might be working against me. Naturally it’s only to be expected. I put a knife in her back. She’d put on in mind. The difference is she’ll give her knife several twists. I don’t know what her ends will be in this game… I can only suspect that the final result will not be pretty when all is said and done.
If that were everything though, I might be able to figure out how to handle this. Maybe I could come up with a solution and avoid the endgame. Maybe I’d be able to emerge triumphant and even fix what has happened. But it’s not. Instead, I discovered that I am horribly compromised… beyond what I could’ve anticipated.
Monday, July 22, 2013…
We open to the first scene of Logan on camera at home in over a month. The Tap Out champion is seated in his study, with a folder laid out on the desk before him, as the camera moves into the room behind him. Logan appears to be sitting there brooding over the folder’s contents, looking quite disappointed. He doesn’t seem to notice the camera behind him.
What’s wrong?
He’s startled slightly by the sudden question, and turns to look at the camera and the person holding it. Relaxing slightly, he turns his back to the camera again.
Is it really that obvious?
Well, I do know you about as well as anybody can. You’ve been through a whole lot as of late but you at least seemed to be handling the load. I know that you’ve got a tough test in front of you for this week. Facing a handicap match is never an easy proposition. I know you did well in the one you faced on Meltdown, but that was also different circumstances. Despite all of that though, you seemed prepared, you looked focused, you were ready.
There’s a pause, waiting for a reply. Which doesn’t come.
Something changed in the last twenty four hours… something that has shaken your resolve from you. I know that you’ve met with your doctor as well earlier today, and you’ve been subdued ever since.
Logan sighs softly.
One day I’ll realize that I cannot hide any secrets from you.
He turns and looks back at her.
He gave me my test results and they were… bad.
Bad? How so?
He looks at the camera.
I’d rather not go into specifics here.
Oh.
He lowers his gaze to the floor and there’s an uneasy silence that seems to stretch.
You know… one thing I liked to pride myself on is the fact that regardless of the situation or circumstances I find myself in, I always felt in control. I was able to handle whatever was placed in front of me. Today though… I think I totally lost it.
The doctor showed me the results, gave me his diagnosis, and told me what it meant… and I snapped at him. I can’t recall any time I’d ever done that to him, regardless of what I was going through. That wasn’t the end of it though. He then gave me his recommendation based on my ‘condition’. I was frustrated by what he’d told me before… but I was outright angry then. It was a bit of a haze then, but I’m pretty sure I had some choice words for him and I distinctly remembered seeing a mug of hot coffee explode.
He looks up at the camera slowly.
It took me a while to process that I had in fact hurled it from his desk into the far wall, scaring the heck out of one of his staff members out in the hallway.
You… did that?
He nods slightly and seems a little shaken as he recalls those events.
I’m pretty sure I did… I can’t remember exactly doing it, but I can say that I certainly appeared to be in the right position to look like the responsible party. I needed about fifteen minutes alone after that to calm back down and get myself under control… I felt so ashamed afterwards too.
It seemed so… justified in the moment, but when I’d calmed down, I couldn’t understand why I’d done that.
What was his recommendation? That seems to have been what upset you.
Logan frowns slightly before he replies.
Withdraw from in ring competition for three months. He suspects that I’ve been suffering from this problem for two to three months and that every match I’ve had has steadily compounded the problem. He also suggested that I seek some psychological therapy after seeing the mood swing.
Again, there’s another silence as all this is taken in.
The only thing that happened in that time span was… your match with the Dying Breed. Where you broke your ribs…
… and apparently a few other things that were missed as well.
Well, you’re not going to be competing while in this condition are you?
He looks away from the camera again.
I’m not forfeiting any matches or my championship. At the moment, I’m contractually obligated to compete until the Shockwave pay per view. Until that point all of my matches are going to happen. After that, I don’t know.
But that’s at least three more matches! Considering who you’re facing this week, you might not make it to the next two matches if you’re hurt.
I will find a way to get through this. I’ve come this far already with this problem. I’ll figure something out… and I’d like you to help me with that.
She lets out a sound of derision from behind the camera.
You know that I’m not going to agree with you.
Logan turns and looks back towards her.
First, we’ll shut off the camera, then I tell you everything, and after that we can figure out how to make this work.
We’ll see.
The scene fades to black.
Saturday, July 27, 2013…
We open inside a darkened room with a single occupant sitting in a chair before the camera, who’s illuminated well enough to be seen clearly, head bowed so that the camera only can see the top of the head of the chair’s occupant. The head slowly raises up to face the camera and we see the person is wearing a mask. It’s black and white and is a mix of shapes and patterns following no rhyme or reason. We can see the wearer eyes, underside of their nose, and mouth. When they speak, it’s clearly the voice of Logan Alexander though.
I admit that this mask looks a little silly, but it’s something I’m going to need for the next few weeks to help deal with my problem. Considering this week I may very well end up being used as a punching bag, I figured I could use some extra protection where it matters most. I’ve gotten a bit more wild and unstable in recent weeks, and now I have to get used to competing with this headpiece on once again. The things that I’m willing to go through for my pride and reputation are mind boggling at times.
He shakes his head slightly
It took a while to get everyone on board for this, but now having reached a consensus, I’m ready to go forward and do what needs to be done for myself personally and professionally.
First and foremost that is going to involve stepping into the ring with one of the most impressive up and coming tag teams in APW right now. Of course what also factors into this equation is the fact that it’s a solo handicap match that may in fact have been engineered by my former tag team partner. Yeah, you heard that right former partner. Until I know what her designs are, I simply cannot put faith in the fact that Aubrey’s decisions are for the best. I’ve given her reason to settle a score, and now I’ll just have to deal with it.
Logan lets out a breath and focuses his attention right on the camera.
Enough about my partner though. I need to focus on the Unforgiven, APW’s newest puppet show if you ask me. The puppet masters pull on the strings and tell them to dance, Blood and Sentinel go out there and do just that, whenever and wherever they are told to. You guys are so used to that role that you’ve even allowed Aubrey to manipulate you into fulfilling her desires this week. Blood suggested that fits the role of being a mercenary. To that I also have to point out that’s also the role of a tool. To be used for all it’s worth and then be discarded. I guess we’ll see soon enough which role you two boys end up being in when all is said and done.
I’ll say here that all things considered, you two boys are walking into this contest with a sizable advantage. You have a numbers advantage. You have no potential outside concerns to deal with. I’m fighting alone against a very proficient tag team. I can’t honestly look back at any point in my career and see a point where this kind of match would ever be favourable to me. I’m not a dominant competitor in any regard. This match might just require dominance on my part in order to beat you two.
But in that admission is one of my strengths, the ability to acknowledge my own weaknesses and thereby allow me to address the ways in which I compensate for them and minimize them. I know that I’m not going to win this match based on my submission skills. I know that if I grab one of you in order to break them in two, which is easy under most circumstances, your partner will come in lay me out and that will pretty much be it. Quite simply that means that all of the preparation that you’ve undergone for this match is pretty much meaningless. You’ve prepared to face a submission master, but unless I’ve neutralized one of you completely, I can’t expect a submission attempt to ever be successful.
Logan shrugs his shoulder slightly, seeming unconcerned with that potential difficulty.
So maybe I don’t impress either of you boys, but I’m not here to win your praise or respect or make you fear me. Instead I’m going to go out and throw out the most unexpected and unorthodox approach I can just for you two. You two seem to be expecting me to come out with a nice and orderly, mat based, technically oriented approach befitting a submission master, but instead you’re going to get chaos. You may very well end up dealing with a faster passed, high impact offence, where I can knock you senseless and score a quick pin before your partner can get through the ropes to save you from disappointment.
He smirks slightly.
Having watched you two compete, checking your records, I know that Sentinel is the better, more dangerous opponent. Blood is the unchecked arrogance that gets his side into trouble more often than not. I gathered that just by listening to him for a couple of minutes. You two are good, but you’re overconfident for no good reason. That’s why you are standing before me now as ‘also ran’s rather than as Tag Team champions. You can make whatever excuses you desire, but the simple fact is that you weren’t up to the challenge.
One thing you need to be aware of is the fact that despite your stated goals for this match… you’re going to fail at them. I can guarantee that I’m going to walk out of this match having taken all that you can throw at me, and by the next time I fight in the ring, all you tried to do will be a distant memory, because there will be no lasting effects. Even if I lose, I’ll still be the Tap Out champion and you two will still just be a team that couldn’t win when it mattered, and only beat a weakened champion in a handicap match. No matter what happens, I am the winner, and you two accomplish nothing. You gain nothing. You prove nothing.
Logan looks quite confident, as he slowly stands to address the camera on last time.
Regardless of what you do, and what you think you accomplish in this match… it’s all meaningless. Think on that before we face off tomorrow, and then we’ll find out what you’re really made of, and if you’re anywhere near as good as all your chatter leads us to believe. In that regard, I believe the world is prepared to be disappointed.
See you tomorrow.
He wave casually to the camera and steps out of the field of view. The lights flicker and go out. The scene goes to black.
