The start of Stefan's emotions/Stefan's journal.

[Lord Raab]

The start of Stefan's emotions. San Diego, California. Wednesday 14th August.

It was very unusual for Stefan to have a counselling session on a Wednesday as he usually has them every Mondays, but due to coming back from Topeka, Kansas, he couldn't, but this time he really needed to see a councillor because ever since Sunday. Raab had mix emotions in his head, from what had happened on that night so the prison guards thought it was best to arrange this counselling session for Stefan, to discuss things with a small blond-haired guy called Pete Young. The prison officers were nowhere near Stefan or Pete because everything they say in the room is private, away from everybody. Stefan had his Raab-A-Mania Germancidal title with him, since the guards thought it might calm him down if he gets angry. Pete begins to speak.

Pete Young: "According to one of our prison guards, I've been told that you needed to chat with me about something am I right?"

Stefan Raab: "Yes I do."

Pete Young: "So why did you need to see me today?"

Stefan looked on the floor thinking to himself for a bit before he speaks about the incident.

Stefan Raab: "Because I'm really scared of Reaver. You see after he kidnapped me, I was like sent to another planet in a dark room where I couldn't see anything and when we were in the dark room, he tortured me. I think I got hit by Reaver's stick and he was hitting me so hard on my five broken ribs that I was coughing up blood, barely able to breathe. I don't know if it was a knife or not, but I felt something sharp against my throat, like I thought he was going to end my life. I even felt a snake, crawling on my knees. I think at one point it even got in my face with its venom teeth, but it didn't bite me."

Pete Young: "Couldn't you leave at all?"

Stefan Raab: "No because I was tied to a chair and I screamed because I thought he was going to kill me, but I could be hallucinating since I couldn't see what he was doing but as soon as I got out, I just changed."

Pete Young: "You've never been scared of wrestling against somebody before have you?"

Stefan Raab: "No I haven't and I need to get rid of those fears before two weeks time. I just haven't been able to eat or sleep at all since I got back, because of having nightmares about the torture I suffered from Reaver. I don't know what to do."

Pete sees Stefan being upset, but Pete felt what Stefan was going through as he had a lot of prisoners that had dealt with being tortured before.

Pete Young: "I know this seems irrelevant but quite a few prisoners have experienced being tortured the way you did except having a snake crawling on you, but I got to say that you are very lucky to be alive in that situation. It means you just have to go out to the ring in two weeks time and beat Reaver."

Stefan Raab: "I don't know if I can because I'm that scared of him, and even more so now with the control of Asylum being on the line. I'm still wondering why I even agreed to put Asylum control on the line?"

Pete Young: "Because Reaver got into your head, Stefan."

Stefan Raab: "No he didn't. Don't lie to me Pete, he forced me to make the match that's all."

Pete Young: "You have to admit he did because it's the truth. I know it's hard to believe, but Reaver was playing a psychological game, messing with your head. Look you just got to forget about what he did and just do your best. As the saying goes it's fine to lose to an opponent, but you mustn't lose to fear."

Stefan nodded as he just looked at his title to calm himself down, being stressed out about the situation. Pete starts to speak.

Pete Young: "Listen Stefan. I can tell you are trying not to cry in front of me, but I suggest you stop bottling your tears up and just let yourself go."

Stefan looked at Pete with anger in his eyes.

Stefan Raab: "NO Pete as I would become a pussy, and I'm not going to let Reaver see or hear me cry."

Pete Young: "What makes you think he will?"

Stefan Raab: "You don't know the guy. He's just a fucking psycho freak that would know everything that goes on here."

Pete Young: "Stefan. Everything that's being said right here is behind closed doors. Reaver and people in APW will not find out anything about what you've said here."

Stefan Raab: "You don't know who could be listening and the word could get out about me being scared like shit about this match. Stop it Pete or I'll destroy you I swear."

Pete Young: "I'm just trying to help you here, but you aren't paying any attention to what I'm saying."

Stefan Raab: "FUCK YOU."

Stefan was so angry about being frightened of Reaver that he was kicking and punching the walls like crazy and Pete gave the Raab-A-Mania Germancidal title to Stefan, but it had little effect as Stefan threw the title on the floor, continuing to kick and punch the wall, ending up making holes in the wall. It got so bad that Pete had to drag Stefan away from the wall, looking at him in the eye.

Pete Young: "Calm the fuck down Stefan. You can't let yourself get angry all the time. You got to know when and how to cry."

Stefan Raab: "No I don't want to."

Pete Young: "It's OK to cry Stefan. Don't be scared as it's the best thing to do now. You got to overcome your fears and I want you to start by crying. Now if you can do that then you will be able to overcome your fears on facing against Reaver in the ring."

Stefan Raab: "Stop forcing me Pete. I can't do it because I've never cried in my life and I don't know how to."

Stefan took deep breaths as he was close on having a heart attack. Stefan had one two weeks ago due to being angry which had sent Stefan to the the hospital and Pete was aware of it.

Pete Young: "What's better Stefan, crying or being angry?"

Stefan Raab: "Being angry because I'm a real man."

Pete Young: "All I'm seeing is a coward, being unable to cry like real men do. I think you are wrong that it should be you crying, because it will save your life. I demand to see a tear on your face now."

Stefan Raab: "Hell no."

Pete Young: "Stefan. Remember what I said earlier about you can't let yourself get angry everyday? That heart attack you suffered is a sign that if you get another one of those, you are in a whole world of danger. I know you survived that one, but the next time it happens, you may not be so lucky and that's exactly why I'm telling you now that you must cry, even if it's just a tear on your face."

Stefan was clearly being tested as he'd gotten even more angry this time as he kicked the table down and then throwing chairs all over the place as he'd kicked and punched the walls. Five minutes later, Stefan stops as he turns to face the left hand side corner of the wall, hiding something away from Pete.

Pete Young: "Stefan?"

Stefan turned around to face Pete.

Stefan Raab: "What the fuck do you want?"

Pete Young: "Are you crying?"

Stefan Raab: "No I am not."

Pete Young: "Oh yes you are because I'm seeing that tear coming down on your face. See you accomplished your goal of letting yourself cry. Well done, now if you can overcome your fear of crying, then you got a chance to win the match against Reaver."

Stefan Raab: "Got a chance? I got this god damn win in the bag, you stupid fool. What Reaver's done is that he's made me want to win this match even more."

Pete Young: "That's more like it and now after you had a tear on your face, do you feel better at all?"

Stefan hated to be tested to cry as he's embarrassed on having a tear on his face which went away as he answered his question.

Stefan Raab: "Yes I do actually."

Pete Young: "From now on, every time we have these counselling sessions, I'm going to test you in every way possible to make you cry even longer. You have to realize that you have to show your emotions to people because you are a human being, no matter how much you hate to show and tell people your feelings, it's just a thing to do. I'm so glad you joined The Black Hand team because that's the start of you showing and telling the team how you feel and learning how to trust people as well. I want you to go out of this room, go to your prison cell and really think about what I've said because it's not just about telling people in wrestling, it's also about telling people outside of wrestling as well."

Stefan Raab: "I don't know if I can do that Pete."

Pete Young: "But you have to Stefan. You can't keep hiding your emotions and feelings from people forever, because bottling things up can hurt you more than if you explain to people why you are angry all the time. We'll continue with this next week. What I'm going to do is I'm going to talk to the guards and see if you can sleep with the title in your cell for a few nights, along with you getting to eat something as well."

Stefan Raab: "I don't need to sleep or eat anything."

Pete Young: "You do Stefan trust me because from looking at you, You're tired, exhausted and very weak and it's because you aren't sleeping or eating anything. Leave this room and go straight to sleep now and the guards will give you some food later."

Stefan feels in himself he was fine but he knows there wasn't any point of arguing over something like that as he responds.

Stefan Raab: "Alright fine. I get some god damn sleep now and eat something later on."

Pete Young: "Good. I'll see you whenever you need to see me next. Bye for now."

Stefan walks out of the counselling room, going straight back into his cell to think about what Pete said as Pete then goes to talk to the guards about having Stefan's title to sleep with for a few nights which they agreed on, and they gave Stefan his Raab-A-Mania Germancidal title. Stefan then takes a piss in the toilet before going straight off to sleep with the title in his hands after the guards have locked Raab up in his cell.

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Stefan's journal.

Well, well Reaver. Look where it's got us both, on being near enough a main event match on the Shockwave PPV. Isn't it funny that I've been main eventing or near about that on every single APW PPV, except the Test For The Best PPV this year? Shows that I've improved a lot since last year doesn't it? You see on Shockwave PPV last year, both of us was wrestling at the beginning of this PPV, with me teaming with that nobody Yarmouth, against the irrelevant wrestlers that aren't around any more except Young Mannie to get the chance to face against the tag team champions. Guess who won that match? That's right The European Invasion did and what did you do last year? Oh that's right you lost a TV match against Phil Atken, who was the weakest wrestler around. I'm glad not to have him on my roster because I wouldn't understand anything that man says to anybody making himself almost irrelevant in APW.

I had to put the control of Asylum spot on the line against you, because I need to see where I stand against other wrestlers in APW, seeing that fighting authority members like Reginald Schmidt and President Jeff wasn't going to get me anywhere, although my win against President Jeff at Rasslemania nine was when the true Stefan was born, but it was only after I was sent to prison that I've changed into a different kind of wrestler, that wasn't all about talk any more. I started to actually win matches because I was showing aggression and becoming more dangerous as a wrestler than I was before, choking people to a point where they almost couldn't breathe any more, with nearly all my opponents I've faced against in the ring.

I got to admit and this is a very rare thing for me to say that you did get me to be scared of you, because at first when I picked you to face in a match. I didn't think you was a threat to me at all with the amount of losses you've had in APW, but I suddenly realized that you kidnapped and tortured me to make myself be afraid and to see you as a threat more.

To be honest with you Reaver, you are the first wrestler ever that has done that to me and it's something I got to live with, for the rest of my life. You made me realize that I'm a human being like everyone else in APW from what I've learned from my counsellor a few days ago, because it's something I have to learn now with how to show my emotions to other people, and even tell people about what I'm feeling as well.

But what you've also done is that you pissed me off as I'm sure I've pissed you off as well with me firing Jason Kash. I fired him because he was coming out with a lot of bullshit about how he cared about Asylum when actually he cared more about Meltdown than my brand, putting over the worthless pathetic Meltdown stars in matches, with his rib injuries being a complete excuse to find his way out of my Raab-A-Mania show. Hell, you don't seem to care much about Asylum either, seeing how you claim to care more about winning titles than actually putting where your mouth is.

Oh let's get into that shall we, seeing how we are on that topic. Wasn't it last year after One Night In Hell PPV when you was bitching about how you deserved to get a title shot? Come on Reaver let's be serious here that Chris Strike was better than you in that match, and I wasn't bitching about even wanting a title shot back then.

I was bitching about Chris got drafted to Asylum without going through Meltdown first, kissing President Jeff's ass by winning some irrelevant title that was all. I didn't even demand to have a title shot until after Rasslemania nine because round about that time, it had been six months since I haven't had a title shot against anybody and I knew that I've done enough to prove myself on getting the chance to face against a champion on Raab-A-Mania.

But then when you did get a title shot against TJ, you still bitched about it just because you wanted the Suicidal title over the Tap Out title, which was such a stupid thing to complain about. What is so special about this Raab-A-Mania Germancidal belt you want so bad over the Tap Out title? There isn't much difference between the two at all, asides from the rules of how to win each title belt that's it. I changed the name of the title, because I'm against anything to do with the word suicide since I'm not the kind of person to go and kill myself. I don't have a god damn clue what you want these days Reaver, because it certainly isn't for the control of Asylum I can tell you that now.

I think the only person that rarely wins these days, on Raab-A-Mania is you because I'm on a winning streak now, while the only time I remember you winning a match was when you defeated Jake Titan on the Super Meltdown show, and that wasn't really a wrestling match either. It was a thumb wrestling match and I think you would've lost if it was just a single's match so that match was an absolute joke, just like you currently are. It makes me sick that people in APW like and respect you for the things you've done with and against Kash in the past, while I've actually done something more special than you have in your entire APW career. It's even more sad and pathetic that I've actually won a title in a year and a half I've been wrestling in APW, but you haven't even had one to your name. That alone shows how much you've improved since you've been in APW which you haven't at all.

I'm not even going there to explain why I joined The Black Hand because right now, it's not relevant to our match, especially as I told them a couple of weeks ago to not interrupt my match against you since I want to win on my own, something you fail to do on a daily bases. I will end it here for now until next Saturday when I have a lot more things I want to say to you Reaver, because I'm only just getting started on talking about you, this match and the control of Asylum.

TAGS; Reaver
WORDS; 2977 without coding
OUTFIT; Prison clothes
NOTES; OK so I've done some storytelling/CD work but I'm very rusty on it hence why I thought to work it in this RP and then do my usual stuff in my second one trying to sell what Reaver did to Stefan along with telling a story about it too. Enjoy peeps.
CREDITS; FlawlessGFX Exclusive for STEFAN RAAB
LYRICS; “Cannibal” by Static-X