Post by Lord Raab on Sept 30, 2013 7:23:50 GMT -4
OOC: I just want to give this first person view RP a shot before I decide if this is best style for me or not before doing those sorts of RP's on the Asylum/PPV shows and also to work on the storytelling/CD work side of things as well.
In the mind of Stefan. San Diego, California.
I sit in this small cell being up against the wall with my head down between my legs. I hear a lot of noises coming from other people that are in Solitary Confinement wanting to get out but they have been in a cell for years or months compared to me that I've been in here for a month. I look down on this hard concrete floor seeing how dirty it is from other people that have been in my cell from years or months ago.
"I am sick and tired of people calling me a joke every single time I'm around APW. I'm not a complete joke at all when I work hard towards the top while nearly everyone else has been given a chance to go for titles and main eventing shows and PPV's. People say I run my mouth but I'm not going to be that guy any more because I'm going to be all about hurting, destroying my opponents in the ring with them being injured in the process of that. Everyone thinks I am not a real wrestler when I am a real wrestler when I kick ass in the ring but nobody sees that with me and I'm sick to death with it like nobody gives a damn about my achievements in wrestling other than people calling me a damn joke everyday. It got me angry and that's why I'm in prison right now because of you fucking pricks treat me as if I suck as a wrestler when I don't. If I did then I wouldn't have defeated a few people or even won a title in the company."
I have been feeling really depressed during the times I've been in here and I have no idea what to do to be able to trust people which has always been a huge problem of mine and it's because of another wrestler not from APW that made me be like this on feeling scared to become friends with wrestlers in APW. The Warden told me that I fear it even being in The Black Hand stable which I barely even talked about. I stamp my feet on the dirty concrete floor.
"I haven't been on twitter since April and some people claim to think that I'm somehow pretending to be this agent to talk trash on twitter. I didn't even know that my agent was arguing on twitter because he and everybody else didn't tell me what was going on and I don't even know what he's been saying on there either so people stop thinking it's me when it's clear as day that I'm not tweeting shit on twitter. That's something I know I have to cut down a lot when I get myself out of prison to get people to see me as a wrestler not a guy that's only known to run my mouth to my opponents and not shutting up.
People have to start looking at me as a threat being a wrestler and I know I have to so in order for me to do that. I needed a change and I'm thankful for whoever put me in Solitary Confinement because I need to become more angry but in a way that's going to make people look at me as a wrestler and not this smash mouth trash talker who doesn't have a clue what I am saying.
I haven't even met people face to face until I appeared on Overdrive to help my Black Hand team from being destroyed. What does this mean with this ongoing war going on between my team, Biggs and CJ Gates? I don't know what's been going on until I experience things first hand. Maybe I have been thinking about coming back to Asylum to wrestle but with Jason Kash as a general manager? No I don't want to be apart of this pathetic circus themed wrestling show and actually being here is much better than wrestling and attending Asylum because at least I don't have to put up with biased booking I know is going on, being screwed to win matches and most of all the favouritism between Kash and everyone else on Asylum. I don't want to come back to wrestle and appear on Asylum because of Kash."
People wonder how I hear things about Asylum and what is happening in the business as I stand up and walked straight to my bed getting the small radio from under my pillow with small earphones as I climbed into my bed and I feel my heart racing and pounding because of how angry I was with what's going on in APW.
"This small radio is how I keep myself updated within the APW company since I can't watch the matches on TV because this prison doesn't have TV's anywhere here apart from security cameras that show what the inmates are doing in here. That's the only way I hear things in APW with a wrestling channel they have since my agent doesn't tell me half of the things that are going on in APW if at all.
I should've been in jail but the judge and President Jeff wanted me to be in prison to change my behaviour towards other wrestlers and they wanted me to witness what it's like if I disrespected someone in public and boy I've been in more fights than I can count and people have made me suffer from having five broken ribs which to this day I'm still recovering from and had a black eye and even been stabbed in my chest just days before I was locked up in this hole."
I then put the radio back under my pillow and then I walked up to the door yelling and screaming to get myself out of Solitary Confinement like I've been doing the last few days with the guards keep telling me over and over again that I can't come out until I accept to show up for Asylum and accept the change. I am now kicking and punching the door with my anger only to realize that I was slowly dropping on the floor because there's no air to breathe and my heart was racing really fast that I had to climb into my bed with my eyes closed.
"I've heard people say that I am not a human being but that's another problem of mine that I forget that I am a human being. People say that because I don't show enough care towards other people in this world which is true but then this match with Kaylyn James Evans happened and suddenly during the match, I had this warm fuzzy feeling in my stomach that I become what normal humans feel nearly everyday. Love and wanting to care for somebody. Why did this happen to me? It's because of being in prison that's made me change who I am as a person and also Reaver torturing me was another thing that was a wake up call as well.
Maybe if I can get closer to Kaylyn without Level One and his girls around then I can see if these feelings I got in the match are for real or it was just a one off thing. Maybe it's time for me to express my real feelings for her in public rather than hiding them from everyone but I can't because I don't like for people to know about my personal life since I fear of it being in the media with the world knowing that I'm turning into a guy that's not a wrestler and is in the business for relationships and money."
I had dreams about being some kind of monster in wrestling that wanted to destroy, hurt and bust people open. I keep thinking about it and the more I did, more I like the idea of it especially I just overcame my fears of Reaver. I suddenly felt a change in my voice that I haven't had in a long while but this time I feel it's going to be a permanent thing. As I spoke in the last bit, my voice was much deeper than it was before like I was turning into a monster. I then continue to speak to test my new voice out.
"When and if I come back. As I said earlier, there will be no more smash mouth Stefan because since being in here is completely dead as from this point and now I want to be a true wrestler that wants blood, wrestlers being injured and wrestlers to be afraid of me. That's the person I want to be and the word "joke" will no longer exist into this world because I will hunt down anyone that uses that excuse of a word and get beaten down so badly that it will just make me happy to see somebody going in hospital. I will go insane and destroy everybody in my way and my first set of victims are Foul Play especially Jason Kash.
Kash is the guy I want to attack the most right now if it's on my own or if The Black Hand feel that they can trust me again then they might join me assaulting him and nobody can stop me. I even want to attack Russ T Nailz and President Jeff for the things they said about me as well especially when they called me a joke which I am not going to put up with any more. It doesn't help for Jeff that he was the one that decided to put Kash as the GM in the first place that makes me want to end his wrestling career by breaking that fucker's legs off putting him in a wheelchair for the rest of his life. That's the person I want to become even if I am having these human feelings towards Kaylyn. I will become a monster and a guy that's going out there to beat everyone down almost to a point where nobody but me will be standing and nobody will be able to control me because that's what being in this place has done to me.
Whoever thought to put me in here was a big mistake because now I am going to yell and scream in anger while I beat wrestlers and staff down anywhere in APW making them suffer from what I have to put up with every single time I enter in the APW building. I love the idea of wrestlers lying in a pool of their own blood from the hands of me and sending them straight to hospital. That I will find entertaining and making sure that people see the new me as being a guy that's a true wrestler not being a trash talker. I'm done talking about the pathetic company that I want to burn down. Kash and Jeff better make sure their wrestlers have health insurance for each one of their wrestlers, staff and themselves because I will be costing this company a lot of money by retiring them permanently until I can't beat anybody else up any more when everyone will be sent to hospital with broken bones and even concussions as well."
Yes I developed a deep darker voice that I can't change because it's permanent now that I have to deal with along with a change of being a scary almost like a psychopath type guy that lives and breathes on beating people up as I went off to sleep dreaming about what I will do when I return to APW television for real other than that Overdrive appearance I made when Kash isn't general manager any more is when I plan to come back to Asylum.
In the mind of Stefan. San Diego, California.
I sit in this small cell being up against the wall with my head down between my legs. I hear a lot of noises coming from other people that are in Solitary Confinement wanting to get out but they have been in a cell for years or months compared to me that I've been in here for a month. I look down on this hard concrete floor seeing how dirty it is from other people that have been in my cell from years or months ago.
"I am sick and tired of people calling me a joke every single time I'm around APW. I'm not a complete joke at all when I work hard towards the top while nearly everyone else has been given a chance to go for titles and main eventing shows and PPV's. People say I run my mouth but I'm not going to be that guy any more because I'm going to be all about hurting, destroying my opponents in the ring with them being injured in the process of that. Everyone thinks I am not a real wrestler when I am a real wrestler when I kick ass in the ring but nobody sees that with me and I'm sick to death with it like nobody gives a damn about my achievements in wrestling other than people calling me a damn joke everyday. It got me angry and that's why I'm in prison right now because of you fucking pricks treat me as if I suck as a wrestler when I don't. If I did then I wouldn't have defeated a few people or even won a title in the company."
I have been feeling really depressed during the times I've been in here and I have no idea what to do to be able to trust people which has always been a huge problem of mine and it's because of another wrestler not from APW that made me be like this on feeling scared to become friends with wrestlers in APW. The Warden told me that I fear it even being in The Black Hand stable which I barely even talked about. I stamp my feet on the dirty concrete floor.
"I haven't been on twitter since April and some people claim to think that I'm somehow pretending to be this agent to talk trash on twitter. I didn't even know that my agent was arguing on twitter because he and everybody else didn't tell me what was going on and I don't even know what he's been saying on there either so people stop thinking it's me when it's clear as day that I'm not tweeting shit on twitter. That's something I know I have to cut down a lot when I get myself out of prison to get people to see me as a wrestler not a guy that's only known to run my mouth to my opponents and not shutting up.
People have to start looking at me as a threat being a wrestler and I know I have to so in order for me to do that. I needed a change and I'm thankful for whoever put me in Solitary Confinement because I need to become more angry but in a way that's going to make people look at me as a wrestler and not this smash mouth trash talker who doesn't have a clue what I am saying.
I haven't even met people face to face until I appeared on Overdrive to help my Black Hand team from being destroyed. What does this mean with this ongoing war going on between my team, Biggs and CJ Gates? I don't know what's been going on until I experience things first hand. Maybe I have been thinking about coming back to Asylum to wrestle but with Jason Kash as a general manager? No I don't want to be apart of this pathetic circus themed wrestling show and actually being here is much better than wrestling and attending Asylum because at least I don't have to put up with biased booking I know is going on, being screwed to win matches and most of all the favouritism between Kash and everyone else on Asylum. I don't want to come back to wrestle and appear on Asylum because of Kash."
People wonder how I hear things about Asylum and what is happening in the business as I stand up and walked straight to my bed getting the small radio from under my pillow with small earphones as I climbed into my bed and I feel my heart racing and pounding because of how angry I was with what's going on in APW.
"This small radio is how I keep myself updated within the APW company since I can't watch the matches on TV because this prison doesn't have TV's anywhere here apart from security cameras that show what the inmates are doing in here. That's the only way I hear things in APW with a wrestling channel they have since my agent doesn't tell me half of the things that are going on in APW if at all.
I should've been in jail but the judge and President Jeff wanted me to be in prison to change my behaviour towards other wrestlers and they wanted me to witness what it's like if I disrespected someone in public and boy I've been in more fights than I can count and people have made me suffer from having five broken ribs which to this day I'm still recovering from and had a black eye and even been stabbed in my chest just days before I was locked up in this hole."
I then put the radio back under my pillow and then I walked up to the door yelling and screaming to get myself out of Solitary Confinement like I've been doing the last few days with the guards keep telling me over and over again that I can't come out until I accept to show up for Asylum and accept the change. I am now kicking and punching the door with my anger only to realize that I was slowly dropping on the floor because there's no air to breathe and my heart was racing really fast that I had to climb into my bed with my eyes closed.
"I've heard people say that I am not a human being but that's another problem of mine that I forget that I am a human being. People say that because I don't show enough care towards other people in this world which is true but then this match with Kaylyn James Evans happened and suddenly during the match, I had this warm fuzzy feeling in my stomach that I become what normal humans feel nearly everyday. Love and wanting to care for somebody. Why did this happen to me? It's because of being in prison that's made me change who I am as a person and also Reaver torturing me was another thing that was a wake up call as well.
Maybe if I can get closer to Kaylyn without Level One and his girls around then I can see if these feelings I got in the match are for real or it was just a one off thing. Maybe it's time for me to express my real feelings for her in public rather than hiding them from everyone but I can't because I don't like for people to know about my personal life since I fear of it being in the media with the world knowing that I'm turning into a guy that's not a wrestler and is in the business for relationships and money."
I had dreams about being some kind of monster in wrestling that wanted to destroy, hurt and bust people open. I keep thinking about it and the more I did, more I like the idea of it especially I just overcame my fears of Reaver. I suddenly felt a change in my voice that I haven't had in a long while but this time I feel it's going to be a permanent thing. As I spoke in the last bit, my voice was much deeper than it was before like I was turning into a monster. I then continue to speak to test my new voice out.
"When and if I come back. As I said earlier, there will be no more smash mouth Stefan because since being in here is completely dead as from this point and now I want to be a true wrestler that wants blood, wrestlers being injured and wrestlers to be afraid of me. That's the person I want to be and the word "joke" will no longer exist into this world because I will hunt down anyone that uses that excuse of a word and get beaten down so badly that it will just make me happy to see somebody going in hospital. I will go insane and destroy everybody in my way and my first set of victims are Foul Play especially Jason Kash.
Kash is the guy I want to attack the most right now if it's on my own or if The Black Hand feel that they can trust me again then they might join me assaulting him and nobody can stop me. I even want to attack Russ T Nailz and President Jeff for the things they said about me as well especially when they called me a joke which I am not going to put up with any more. It doesn't help for Jeff that he was the one that decided to put Kash as the GM in the first place that makes me want to end his wrestling career by breaking that fucker's legs off putting him in a wheelchair for the rest of his life. That's the person I want to become even if I am having these human feelings towards Kaylyn. I will become a monster and a guy that's going out there to beat everyone down almost to a point where nobody but me will be standing and nobody will be able to control me because that's what being in this place has done to me.
Whoever thought to put me in here was a big mistake because now I am going to yell and scream in anger while I beat wrestlers and staff down anywhere in APW making them suffer from what I have to put up with every single time I enter in the APW building. I love the idea of wrestlers lying in a pool of their own blood from the hands of me and sending them straight to hospital. That I will find entertaining and making sure that people see the new me as being a guy that's a true wrestler not being a trash talker. I'm done talking about the pathetic company that I want to burn down. Kash and Jeff better make sure their wrestlers have health insurance for each one of their wrestlers, staff and themselves because I will be costing this company a lot of money by retiring them permanently until I can't beat anybody else up any more when everyone will be sent to hospital with broken bones and even concussions as well."
Yes I developed a deep darker voice that I can't change because it's permanent now that I have to deal with along with a change of being a scary almost like a psychopath type guy that lives and breathes on beating people up as I went off to sleep dreaming about what I will do when I return to APW television for real other than that Overdrive appearance I made when Kash isn't general manager any more is when I plan to come back to Asylum.