Post by sugoi on Aug 5, 2015 10:15:34 GMT -4
It’s a beautiful day in Beverly Hills, California. The sun is shining and the birds are chirping, but really, there’s at least one person chillaxing in his Palace of Weeaboo ISM that doesn’t care much for sunshine. By Palace of Weeaboo ISM, naturally, I mean his home which is crammed to the gills with more character good than you can shake a leek at.
He is instead just finishing up his daily hunts on Final Fantasy XIV (he rolls a ninja, as if you had to ask). He is clad in a pair of black sweatpants and a t-shirt depicting a bunch of high school girls from a popular anime known as Love Live! He is also one of the two newest stars to sign with APW.
By process of elimination, this information makes him SUGOI Suga. A few quick clicks of his mouse get him out of his MMORPG, and he swivels around in a very nice looking leather chair.
“Konnichiwa!” Suga yells, pumping both fists in the air and striking as dramatic a pose as one can possibly strike while sitting down. “It is I, the master of all things Japanese and cultural, SUGOI Suga, here to tell all you SUGAIZ and SUGALZ that what you have heard is in fact true! My knee’s 150 million percent, and I’m back in the wrestling game again for APW!”
Suga points to his knee, and raps his knuckles against it three times before giving the thumbs up.
“See? GOOD TO GO!”
It’s not the most convincing of demonstrations, but there’s something about SUGOI’s sheer earnestness that makes it moreso than it really probably ever should be.
“I’m in a new company, and that means that I’ve got to prove myself all over again! Just like an RPG sequel where somehow your character’s totally forgotten EVERYTHING they learned on their first journey, as far as APW’s concerned, I’m Level 1, and that’s just fine with your boy SUGOI right here. I’m gonna get out my wooden sword and my moth-eaten shield and get ready fight my way up the mountain! And it all starts against a guy called HusH, who I don’t like already? HusH? I NEVER shut up! My FIGHTING SPIRIT don’t work unless I’m spitting hot fire 24/7/THREE-SIXTY-FIVE!”
SUGOI hops up from his chair, and spins in a circle. This lets us see his utterly incredible collection of posters and wall scrolls that adorn every inch of this, his bedroom. Many of them are signed by the voice actresses of the characters depicted.
“HusH, you’re going to learn right quick that there is no preparing for the SUGOI Suga Experience. When I step into the squared circle? Even I don’t know what I’m gonna do! Cause I kick like a fourth dan black belt in tae kwon do! I’ve got a one inch punch that could rob you of your LIFE if you look at me the wrong way! I jump around like the House of Pain on more speed than the guys from Dragonforce, and with the positive social messages of Babymetal!”
He strikes a not entirely convincing kung fu pose, complete with “WAAAAAA-TAAAAAA~!” yell.
“And if all that fails, Quiet Guy? I jump on your back and make you SUGOI 2 SLEEP with the QUICKNESS. I’ve been in the gym, training! I’ve been watching all the hot-blooded shounen anime I can find, and I’ve got to say, I’m full of MANLY FIGHTING SPIRIT right now! I make Fist of the North Star look wussy! You can claim to be a silent killer all you want, but brother, I know ninjas, and YOU AIN’T NO NINJA! Sure, you might weigh like one hundred pounds more than me, but that won’t matter if you can’t catch me, and I’m faster than you can IMAGINE, amigo!”
The self-professed White Man’s Jackie Chan bounces back and forth on the balls of his feet, a wide grin on his face.
“You’re a MONSTER, HusH. You want everyone to be afraid, but I face my nightmares head on - like dying, or getting swallowed up in a sharknado, or….ALL OF MY CHARACTER GOODS BEING LOST IN A FIRE! DEAR GOD, NO, NOT THAT! ANYTHING BUT THAT! I’LL TAKE THE SHARKNADO!”
Suga shudders violently, closing his eyes and trying to make the pain go away as he falls back into his chair and rocks back and forth. After ten or fifteen seconds, his eyes finally open, and he jumps back to his feet.
“Sorry about that! It was just...TOO horrible a thought. Where was I? Oh, yeah - I’M NOT GONNA BE AFRAID OF HUSH! I’m gonna face him head on like I’m the protagonist and he’s a monster of the week! Sure, he’ll get a few good shots in, but when all’s said and done, it’ll be MY hand raised in victory! Bring everything you have, big guy, because I’m declaring this an Attack on Titan! It’s gonna be HIGH FLYING! It’s gonna be KICK PUNCH CHOP SOCK FUN FOR THE ENTIRE FAMILY! IT’S GONNA BE SUPAH SWEET!”
Suga snaps off a picture-perfect, crisp bow, but the smirk on his face only deepens as he delivers what is, in his mind, the best clincher in professional wrestling.
“And you can bet your last yen that it’s gonna be SUUUUUGGOOOOOIIIIIIIIIII~”
Yuuuuuuuuuup.
-----------------------------
That’s SUGOI Suga in full-fledged bishounen, hot-blooded protagonist weeaboo lover of Glorious Nippon mode. There’s another SUGOI Suga, though. He loves Japanese culture just as much, but he’s nowhere near as loud. He’s was a trust fund kid from California whose parents disapproved of his love of anime and manga and super sentai to the point that it hurt their relationship.
They died in a cable car accident before fences could ever really be mended, but it gave SUGOI the willingness to pursue his dreams. It’s that SUGOI that’s standing outside of the Moda Center, by far the largest building he’ll have ever wrestled in.
It’s that SUGOI who looks up at the marquee, reading the words “ACTION PACKED WRESTLING,” and can’t help but be a little amazed at just how far he’s come in the world.
“I can’t believe your goofy ass is working a building this size,” a gruff voice tells the Sultan of Suga ISM. In spite of its tone, the owner of that voice has a grin a mile wide. He has salt and pepper hair and a rugged physique. He claps a powerful hand on SUGOI’s shoulder, and the slighter man winces noticeably.
“Thanks, Pete,” SUGOI replies, “but less hard next time? I’ve got a match to compete in, you know!”
“Pete” is Pete Williams, a California journeyman professional wrestler with a handful of Japanese and European tours to his name. The Pete Williams School of Wrestling is a small but proud dojo in California that has graduated thirteen students over the course of three years, but SUGOI Suga is by far the most known of those students.
“I’ll take it easy on ya next time,” trainer promises student. “This is big. You know that, though. This is where the goddamned Portland Trail Blazers play!”
“That sounds important,” SUGOI admits, “but who the Hell are the Portland Trail Blazers?”
Pete sighs and shakes his head. “Portland’s professional basketball team. I forgot, you’re one of the few people on the planet who wouldn’t know that. Do you even watch sports?"
“Baseball!” is SUGOI’s immediate reply. “I’m a big fan of the Nippon Ham Fighters. I also try to watch sumo when I can, though it’s not shown much here. I’ve got a guy in Hawaii who records it off the Japanese channel and sends it to me.”
“I should watch that stuff sometime,” Williams says. “You can learn a lot about positioning and technique. I hear a lot of the Japanese wrestlers practice it, too.”
SUGOI nods. “Yeah. I’d like to give it a try down the road. For that, though, I’ve got to get a job in Japan, and right now? I’ve got a pretty big job.”
“No argument from me,” Pete said. “They can fit almost 20,000 people in this building. You think you can handle that? You’re the first match on the card. First time seeing APW stars, even if you and that HusH guy are both new. You ready to hear that many maniacs screaming?”
The Lord of All Weeaboos thinks for a moment, and then nods his head.
“I’m ready. I love hearing the crowds go crazy. I feed off of it, y’know? I hear some guys and gals talk about how they tune everything out when they’re in the ring, and that just sounds kinda insane to me. Without them going crazy? I don’t know if I’d have the balls to do some of the ridiculous shit I do."
For Pete Williams, a man who almost walked out on a barbed wire baseball bat deathmatch in Japan before he heard the cheering of a thousand rabid fans in Yokohama, the logic makes a surprising amount of sense.
“Then you’ll be fine out there, SUGOI. All you’ve got to do is believe in yourself. You have the talent to succeed on any level you want. When you walked in the door of my school, I thought you’d be gone in a day, and that was my own damn fault for judging a book by its cover. I’m gonna go into this huge arena tonight and watch one of my kids tear the house down.”
Pete digs into his pocket, pulling out a ticket to the show.
“I should be going. You’ve probably got prep to do, and I want to get in there and get a pretzel the size of my head and a diet Coke.”
Mentor and student embrace, with Pete being careful when he slaps SUGOI on the back. Without a further word, Pete is off, marching towards the building in search of his snacks for an evening of APW action.
That just leaves SUGOI, looking up at a gigantic, first-class arena.
“This is everything I’ve ever wanted,” he tells himself, whispering the words under his breath as he begins to walk around the building’s perimeter, looking for the talent entrance. “All I’ve got to do is take it.”
And beat a much larger foe in the process. No big deal, right?
Right. Because for SUGOI Suga, overcoming the odds is a daily fact of life.
(Fin)
He is instead just finishing up his daily hunts on Final Fantasy XIV (he rolls a ninja, as if you had to ask). He is clad in a pair of black sweatpants and a t-shirt depicting a bunch of high school girls from a popular anime known as Love Live! He is also one of the two newest stars to sign with APW.
By process of elimination, this information makes him SUGOI Suga. A few quick clicks of his mouse get him out of his MMORPG, and he swivels around in a very nice looking leather chair.
“Konnichiwa!” Suga yells, pumping both fists in the air and striking as dramatic a pose as one can possibly strike while sitting down. “It is I, the master of all things Japanese and cultural, SUGOI Suga, here to tell all you SUGAIZ and SUGALZ that what you have heard is in fact true! My knee’s 150 million percent, and I’m back in the wrestling game again for APW!”
Suga points to his knee, and raps his knuckles against it three times before giving the thumbs up.
“See? GOOD TO GO!”
It’s not the most convincing of demonstrations, but there’s something about SUGOI’s sheer earnestness that makes it moreso than it really probably ever should be.
“I’m in a new company, and that means that I’ve got to prove myself all over again! Just like an RPG sequel where somehow your character’s totally forgotten EVERYTHING they learned on their first journey, as far as APW’s concerned, I’m Level 1, and that’s just fine with your boy SUGOI right here. I’m gonna get out my wooden sword and my moth-eaten shield and get ready fight my way up the mountain! And it all starts against a guy called HusH, who I don’t like already? HusH? I NEVER shut up! My FIGHTING SPIRIT don’t work unless I’m spitting hot fire 24/7/THREE-SIXTY-FIVE!”
SUGOI hops up from his chair, and spins in a circle. This lets us see his utterly incredible collection of posters and wall scrolls that adorn every inch of this, his bedroom. Many of them are signed by the voice actresses of the characters depicted.
“HusH, you’re going to learn right quick that there is no preparing for the SUGOI Suga Experience. When I step into the squared circle? Even I don’t know what I’m gonna do! Cause I kick like a fourth dan black belt in tae kwon do! I’ve got a one inch punch that could rob you of your LIFE if you look at me the wrong way! I jump around like the House of Pain on more speed than the guys from Dragonforce, and with the positive social messages of Babymetal!”
He strikes a not entirely convincing kung fu pose, complete with “WAAAAAA-TAAAAAA~!” yell.
“And if all that fails, Quiet Guy? I jump on your back and make you SUGOI 2 SLEEP with the QUICKNESS. I’ve been in the gym, training! I’ve been watching all the hot-blooded shounen anime I can find, and I’ve got to say, I’m full of MANLY FIGHTING SPIRIT right now! I make Fist of the North Star look wussy! You can claim to be a silent killer all you want, but brother, I know ninjas, and YOU AIN’T NO NINJA! Sure, you might weigh like one hundred pounds more than me, but that won’t matter if you can’t catch me, and I’m faster than you can IMAGINE, amigo!”
The self-professed White Man’s Jackie Chan bounces back and forth on the balls of his feet, a wide grin on his face.
“You’re a MONSTER, HusH. You want everyone to be afraid, but I face my nightmares head on - like dying, or getting swallowed up in a sharknado, or….ALL OF MY CHARACTER GOODS BEING LOST IN A FIRE! DEAR GOD, NO, NOT THAT! ANYTHING BUT THAT! I’LL TAKE THE SHARKNADO!”
Suga shudders violently, closing his eyes and trying to make the pain go away as he falls back into his chair and rocks back and forth. After ten or fifteen seconds, his eyes finally open, and he jumps back to his feet.
“Sorry about that! It was just...TOO horrible a thought. Where was I? Oh, yeah - I’M NOT GONNA BE AFRAID OF HUSH! I’m gonna face him head on like I’m the protagonist and he’s a monster of the week! Sure, he’ll get a few good shots in, but when all’s said and done, it’ll be MY hand raised in victory! Bring everything you have, big guy, because I’m declaring this an Attack on Titan! It’s gonna be HIGH FLYING! It’s gonna be KICK PUNCH CHOP SOCK FUN FOR THE ENTIRE FAMILY! IT’S GONNA BE SUPAH SWEET!”
Suga snaps off a picture-perfect, crisp bow, but the smirk on his face only deepens as he delivers what is, in his mind, the best clincher in professional wrestling.
“And you can bet your last yen that it’s gonna be SUUUUUGGOOOOOIIIIIIIIIII~”
Yuuuuuuuuuup.
-----------------------------
That’s SUGOI Suga in full-fledged bishounen, hot-blooded protagonist weeaboo lover of Glorious Nippon mode. There’s another SUGOI Suga, though. He loves Japanese culture just as much, but he’s nowhere near as loud. He’s was a trust fund kid from California whose parents disapproved of his love of anime and manga and super sentai to the point that it hurt their relationship.
They died in a cable car accident before fences could ever really be mended, but it gave SUGOI the willingness to pursue his dreams. It’s that SUGOI that’s standing outside of the Moda Center, by far the largest building he’ll have ever wrestled in.
It’s that SUGOI who looks up at the marquee, reading the words “ACTION PACKED WRESTLING,” and can’t help but be a little amazed at just how far he’s come in the world.
“I can’t believe your goofy ass is working a building this size,” a gruff voice tells the Sultan of Suga ISM. In spite of its tone, the owner of that voice has a grin a mile wide. He has salt and pepper hair and a rugged physique. He claps a powerful hand on SUGOI’s shoulder, and the slighter man winces noticeably.
“Thanks, Pete,” SUGOI replies, “but less hard next time? I’ve got a match to compete in, you know!”
“Pete” is Pete Williams, a California journeyman professional wrestler with a handful of Japanese and European tours to his name. The Pete Williams School of Wrestling is a small but proud dojo in California that has graduated thirteen students over the course of three years, but SUGOI Suga is by far the most known of those students.
“I’ll take it easy on ya next time,” trainer promises student. “This is big. You know that, though. This is where the goddamned Portland Trail Blazers play!”
“That sounds important,” SUGOI admits, “but who the Hell are the Portland Trail Blazers?”
Pete sighs and shakes his head. “Portland’s professional basketball team. I forgot, you’re one of the few people on the planet who wouldn’t know that. Do you even watch sports?"
“Baseball!” is SUGOI’s immediate reply. “I’m a big fan of the Nippon Ham Fighters. I also try to watch sumo when I can, though it’s not shown much here. I’ve got a guy in Hawaii who records it off the Japanese channel and sends it to me.”
“I should watch that stuff sometime,” Williams says. “You can learn a lot about positioning and technique. I hear a lot of the Japanese wrestlers practice it, too.”
SUGOI nods. “Yeah. I’d like to give it a try down the road. For that, though, I’ve got to get a job in Japan, and right now? I’ve got a pretty big job.”
“No argument from me,” Pete said. “They can fit almost 20,000 people in this building. You think you can handle that? You’re the first match on the card. First time seeing APW stars, even if you and that HusH guy are both new. You ready to hear that many maniacs screaming?”
The Lord of All Weeaboos thinks for a moment, and then nods his head.
“I’m ready. I love hearing the crowds go crazy. I feed off of it, y’know? I hear some guys and gals talk about how they tune everything out when they’re in the ring, and that just sounds kinda insane to me. Without them going crazy? I don’t know if I’d have the balls to do some of the ridiculous shit I do."
For Pete Williams, a man who almost walked out on a barbed wire baseball bat deathmatch in Japan before he heard the cheering of a thousand rabid fans in Yokohama, the logic makes a surprising amount of sense.
“Then you’ll be fine out there, SUGOI. All you’ve got to do is believe in yourself. You have the talent to succeed on any level you want. When you walked in the door of my school, I thought you’d be gone in a day, and that was my own damn fault for judging a book by its cover. I’m gonna go into this huge arena tonight and watch one of my kids tear the house down.”
Pete digs into his pocket, pulling out a ticket to the show.
“I should be going. You’ve probably got prep to do, and I want to get in there and get a pretzel the size of my head and a diet Coke.”
Mentor and student embrace, with Pete being careful when he slaps SUGOI on the back. Without a further word, Pete is off, marching towards the building in search of his snacks for an evening of APW action.
That just leaves SUGOI, looking up at a gigantic, first-class arena.
“This is everything I’ve ever wanted,” he tells himself, whispering the words under his breath as he begins to walk around the building’s perimeter, looking for the talent entrance. “All I’ve got to do is take it.”
And beat a much larger foe in the process. No big deal, right?
Right. Because for SUGOI Suga, overcoming the odds is a daily fact of life.
(Fin)
