Post by Slade "The Main Man" Craven on Jan 29, 2010 20:38:37 GMT -4
As we start out today, Slade Craven is in the back locker ripping open boxes of what appear to be Christmas presents. He is actually in Slade Craven pajamas in what looked to be the old A.K.A. locker room. The table is beset with some foods, all of which appear to be healthy and the chairs are decorated to look like the sides of a fireplace, a board is set over the seats , flipped on its side with a stocking hung from it. Craven is ripping up the black and green wrapping paper as he sits in the old A.K.A. office by himself. There is an obvious recognition of nostalgia. Almost like Slade was not happy to see Shadow leave, that he longed for the ‘days of yore’ Slade pulls open the box and pulls out a black and blue flamed leather jacket. It looks old, torn and stained with what may very well be blood against the material. Craven seems happy as can be to hold this jacket in his hand. He clutches it tightly and says.
Slade- Just what I wanted!
He folds the jacket up and sets it on the floor next to him, that cold, hard floor. His long pajama lounge pants are green with pictures of Slade Craven on them in his ring corner pose where he leans back and points to himself with both his middle and ring fingers. They are apparel A.P.W. has never marketed. In fact they look a little faded. His name is spelled in black on the pants. His shirt is an original “Rue the Day” shirt. Slade reaches over and opens the next present that’s sitting by him. it’s a blue wrapped gift and we faintly see the card show a cheesy crayon drawing of Slade in the “To” section, with an equally colored Santa in the “From” section. While it may be odd that “The Main Man” is opening presents one month after Christmas, there has to be something to it. Perhaps that Slade was wrestling for Christmas and didn’t get to have one. Maybe he was robbed of his Christmas by a pompous over bearing jackass. It doesn’t matter now though because Slade believes what goes around, sure as hell comes around. He would enjoy taking that title from Level One’s hand. As Slade begins to frantically rip open the box we see the paper fly everywhere. Craven opens the box and pulls out picture. In it is Slade and his Ex Wife Stacy. A reminder of the past. Slade stares at it for a moment as he remembers the days with her by his side. He remembers how she recently got married again, to someone he used to trust and now despised because of his breaking of the guy code. Slade set the photo down. In it Slade stands in a ring with silver ropes and a black mat, he is standing there with Stacy, his arms raised high.
Slade- To better days.
He takes a drink from a bottle of water sitting next to him. Craven still is not drinking. He has been good about everything. As he sits there the camera over his shoulder, well it may not be a camera, it could just be an omniscient viewer. They focus on the picture and the jacket on the floor. Its obvious that Slade is in a non heated place, his breath heats the air. And as the picture moves closer to the viewer Slade becomes blurry. We get a glimpse of the past. Slade’s history. Well, it’s a montage. And its got a great soundtrack! As the montage opens we see ‘The Main Man” and Shadow shake hands in the middle of the A.P.W. ring shortly after Slade beat Hellas in his debut. Then it swiftly cuts to both of them in the ring getting the fans behind them before a match, looks like before the first A.K.A. Tag match. Next after the words are said and the music begins it cuts to Slade Craven walking to the ring along side his tag partner, Shadow. With each step Slade and Shadow take, Shadow begins to fade out of the picture.
Carry on my wayward son,
For there'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Now don't you cry no more
Craven slides under the bottom rope and now he is not in the A.P.W. ring, it has merged with him in an old ring wearing that black and blue flamed jacket with Stacy at his side. He leaps across the ring and begins swinging against an opponent.
Once I rose above the noise and confusion
Just to get a glimpse beyond the illusion
I was soaring ever higher, but I flew too high
Though my eyes could see I still was a blind man
Though my mind could think I still was a mad man
I hear the voices when I'm dreamin',
I can hear them say
As he and the guy trade punches in the ring Slade beats him back to the ropes and shoots him off and turns springboards off the ropes into a moonsault where his ankles wrap around his opponent’s neck into a modified hurricarana. He is shown kicking the opponent in the gut and hitting the Fly Fly. A pin fall scored afterwards. All this playing during the first verse of the song.
Carry on my wayward son,
For there'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Now don't you cry no more
Craven is shown fighting Assassin now inside the Anarchy Cell. Both men brutally taking the match to the next level. Assassin and Slade hitting big move after big move. Craven going through a table. Assassin getting hit with a chair. All the power behind their respect for one another.
Masquerading as a man with a reason
My charade is the event of the season
And if I claim to be a wise man, it surely
means that I don't know
“Slade Craven isn’t here for gold, he is here to whip ass” We hear Slade’s voice over the verse as it starts the second one. We then see Slade making the motion that he is going to be the next champion, marking the belt around his waist. The fans silently roaring in the background against the muted clip. And we hear Level One’s voice. “Now suddenly, The Main Man is all about the gold”
On a stormy sea of moving emotion
Tossed about I'm like a ship on the ocean
I set a course for winds of fortune, but
I hear the voices say
Things get slow as we see the match between Slade Craven and Level One. First it shows both of them just standing there, with Level One’s intentional disrespect. As the chorus draws near and the moment it begins we see Slade slap Level One in the face
Carry on my wayward son,
For there'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Now don't you cry no more! Whoo!
As the chorus plays we see spots where Slade was on top during the match, the drop kick off the ropes, The sling shot over the top, but it doesn’t show the miss. It cuts to Craven throwing the punches in the ring, beating Level One back, then splits over to Craven countering the Darkness Shine into the big DDT, then the Leg Lock DDT, followed by the Multiple German Suplexes The final verse begins to play.
Carry on, you will always remember
Craven hit’s the corkscrew moonsault
Carry on, nothing equals the splendor
He goes for the cover… 2 count!
Now your life's no longer empty
The springboard leg drop!
Surely heaven waits for you
Pin attempt! 2 Count!
Carry on my wayward son,
For there'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Now don't you cry-
As it hits this moment everything slows as Slade is hit with the belt directly in the face.
Don't you cry no more!
As the music plays we see in slow motion, Craven falling back to the ground. And then it shifts to Craven trying to fight his way out of the Level Advance while the music begins to play. It hits and the faces of the people in the crowd turn depressed as the ref’s hand comes down three times. There is a black and white moment as Slade lays in the ring and Level One rolls off as he gets his belt. Then another round of the chorus plays for a moment while we see Slade Craven coming out and taunting Level One for a rematch and the fans.
Carry on my wayward son,
For there'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Now don't you cry no more
Shadow is shown again for a moment faintly walking up the ramp after his match with Chris Cyrus. His back to the stage as Slade lays in the ring after the last overdrive. As the song comes to a close we hear the words faintly “Slade lived in his partner’s shadow, he will never be anything with out him.”
The words are not anyone in A.P.W. it’s a recording from years ago, when Slade first teamed with Shadow. When people thought Shadow was bringing Slade into a new federation. It was not the case, in fact Shadow was bringing in Slade because Slade was looking to branch out after establishing himself as a champion. After those words are spoken everything fades to black. While it looked at first to be an upbeat montage of Slade in A.P.W. showing he can survive on his own, it showed his defeat to Level One at Christmas Chaos. But there was a reason for it. It showed the end of an era. Shadow would not be there to have Slade back anymore, and if “The Main Man” had ever become dependant on having to save his ass, then Craven needed a wake up call. But luckily that wasn’t the case. Craven wrestled for years on his own, with the hounds of hell seeking to take him out. Slade survived them, and he sure as hell was not going to fall before the newly formed love triangle of C.L.B. This wasn’t punishment, it was practice. Slade made his name taking down the power, rebelling against the establishment, upsetting the natural order. And while he sits there on that hard freezing floor we can see that Slade is remembering that Shadow would not want Slade to carry on as the A.K.A. He would want his tag partner to go back to being the man he was years ago, the man he still was, just without any help. Slade was going to raise hell, piss people off and make sure everyone remembered what he stood for, Ass Kicking. Some people pray, others meditate, Slade stomps a mudhole in your ass. That’s what would happen. Craven didn’t need a tag partner, he could look out for himself, and that’s exactly what he would be doing.
Slade- Time to put away childish things.
He picks up the old coat and sets it in the box with his picture of his old wife. Those we the past too. Craven wasn’t going to be like Shadow. He was not going to pull out the old wrestling gear and wear it for luck. Craven didn’t need to call an old friend for help. All Slade had to do was be himself.
Slade- Oh! More presents!
As he drops down and pulls a couple of boxes out from under the table Slade sees that these gifts are not for him.
Slade- What the hell are these doing here? They don’t belong here at all. Santa must have made a mistake. Wait! No! He wants Santa Craven to deliver the presents! Cool, Santa Craven can do that!
There is a giddy look on Slade’s face as he reaches down, grabs the green table cloth that all the food is sitting on. Its mainly celery sticks, carrot sticks, cheeses, crackers and other semi nutritious snacks. Craven grips the cloth tightly and whips it back. All the food goes flying through the old office.
Slade- That looked like it would go differently in the ole head.
Craven has made one hell of a mess. But nevertheless Slade lays the cloth on the ground and tosses the boxes onto the table cloth then begins to pull its up into a bag. He smiles and lifts the bag up slinging it over his shoulder, bolting out the door of the A.K.A. office and down the hall. There is a slight cut as if we are going from real life to something else.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Slade Craven is running through the locker room hallways of Madison Square Garden with the green table cloth pulled up like a sack as he hauls the gifts over his shoulder. As Craven hurries through the halls he passes several crew members and near knocks over quiet a few. While “The Main Man” bustles over people, they yell at him, various versions of the following phrase.
Pissed off Crew People: Where the hell do you think you’re going?!
To which Slade always replied,
Slade- Santa Craven must deliver these present!
It was yelled in such an over the top heroic voice that its safe to assume it baffled the crew people Slade passed. Craven is on a mission n there is a bag full of presents, none meant for him, but if you think well enough, those of you playing the home game already know who they belong to. Suddenly Craven hits the brakes. He literally skids to a stop as his boots slide against the linoleum floor. Slade takes a second to catch his breath then he kicks a door open, it looks to be an established office for President Jeff, who isn’t here right now obviously. Instead the nameplate reads “Axis of Awesome.” Slade steps into the empty office and looks around. There is a camera still following him; it must have been on a dolly track or something. Slade turns to face it and says with a smile.
Slade- Welcome! This is a special follow up issue with “Christmas with Craven” while Slade “The Main Man” Craven has donned his Santa profession once again to deliver toys and presents to the needy. Now while many of you at home may be wondering “Why would professional wrestlers be needy? There is no way they need anything, they have all the money in the world!” Well, that is not exactly the truth, pro wrestlers are still needy, and that’s why “The Main Man” is here today. You see, the Axis needs something, well they need a lot of something so Slade is here to deliver.
Craven swings the bag knocking over everything on the desk and lets the table cloth open up. Inside are several little boxes he begins to pull up the ‘gifts.’ The first is…
Slade- “Not a Douche” By Matthew McConaughey. This is the quintessential book anyone should have. It has a detailed explanation about what makes you a douche, and what you can do to change that. Biggs, Santa Craven feels this would be the perfect gift for you because you are without a doubt…
He picks up a photo of Biggs that has several arrows pointing to it. It shows Biggs standing in the ring in his attire at the start of last week’s Overdrive. The arrows start at the top pointing to his face saying “Smug smile,” then to his shirt, “Gay shirt,” then to his shirt again, “Two sizes too small,” then to his skin, “Too long in tanning bed” and lastly to his hair “Woman’s hair” At the top it reads “Douchebag: Someone with an over-inflated sense of one’s self, low intelligence and does not realize that others around them think they are an ever growing annoyance.”
Slade- A douchebag. Don’t worry though, “The Main Man” understands it’s a disease you have no power to control. Its what made you assume power here in A.P.W. in Jeff’s absence. You have to be a douche bag, its in your blood. And Slade has brought you the gift to help. Perhaps after Survive and Conquer, when you have finished reading this book, you can come out and not pull crap moves with your little buddies, jumping people who remind you what a bitch you are.
He goes to set the book down, put lifts it again, opening it.
Slade- Oh, yeah, it’s got pictures too. Just perfect right? Slade thought you would like this gift.
He sets the book down and pauses briefly before reaching back onto the table cloth.
Slade- For Chris Cyrus, Santa has brought… “Don’t Jump!” The top twenty songs about not killing yourself.
He holds up a two pack CD set.
Slade- Santa felt that after you got your ass handed to you by Shadow in his last match you needed something to remind yourself that you don’t need to kill yourself. While you may be thinking “The Main Man” would get you something to properly edit a damn video, instead Slade knows Santa wanted to give you something to remind you that Shadow beat your ass in his last match. It must suck to know that you never beat Shadow, and he stopped your dreams of being the one man to beat every member of the A.K.A. What’s better is Shadow gets to go down in history as the one man to take out every member of the Axis. Got to suck knowing you allowed that to happen huh? But that’s why Santa got you “Don’t Jump” because everyone in locker room still enjoys making fun of you and doesn’t want to lose that free, and easy, material.
Craven smiles and sets both CDs down on the desk. His smile is still present as he pulls out a black leather mask.
Slade- And for the Beast, to show your true place in the Axis Santa Craven got you a very nice replica of a famous movie prop. This is a replica of the original “Gimp” mask from Tarantino’s Pulp Fiction. With that in mind you to can truly understand your place in your stable as Biggs really has to ask for someone to bring your ass out whenever you make an appearance like last week. You walk like you’re being led by a leash and don’t say much, so naturally “The Main Man” agrees with Santa that this is the best gift you could ever receive. Now, you do not have to thank “The Main Man” for getting these wonderful gifts to you from Santa, because remember, Santa Craven loves helping the needy and guys you really needed this stuff.
Slade bundles the table cloth up again and swings it wide deliberately knocking over a shelf. With a wince Slade watches it crash to the ground the he whips his head to the door and charges out in a heroic fashion.
Slade- Onward!
Craven takes off and continues running down the hallway. He does not run far though. Slade stops in front of a door. He looks at the nameplate, “Victor Hades.” Craven smiles and tries to open it, but the door is locked. Craven tries again, still locked. Slade looks a little bummed. Then he sets the tablecloth bag on the ground. Slade begins rummaging through it.
Slade- Well since Santa Craven is not capable of slipping through chimneys or anything of that sort, not that this asshole has a chimney in there, Anyway, Slade thinks its time to give out Victor’s gift even if that asshole is not here to accept it. Slade will leave it for him, something he needs more than anything.
Craven rummages through the small boxes right quick then stands and grabs some tape slapping it on the back of a small package and slamming it against the door hard. It shows on the camera recording all this.
Slade- Good old fashioned trusty razor blades. Victor do the world a favor and use them. Remember Kitten, its down the road, not across the street.
Craven makes a motion for Victor to pay attention to.
Slade- You might be wondering why “The Main Man” would do such a thing. Well mainly cause like Shadow, Slade Craven thinks Victor is nothing more than an overrated joke. Plus Slade heard what you said about Shadow. Victor the man who pays for his women, well maybe they are women if you look closely it looks like there is a bump in that throat. Anyway. Victor. You think you were the man to end Shadow. Its exactly why Shadow didn’t walk after Christmas Chaos. You forget he came back and beat someone else’s ass, and more over look at what it took for you to even have a chance to beat him? This first time, you didn’t have all your little toys in the ring, to had to have something to level the playing field so to speak. But that’s what people like you do. And that’s why Slade says this. Victor you think Shadow and “The Main Man” rode on Brokeback Mountain? That’s really what you’re thinking about? Seems like its what’s really on your mind. Back in the middle ages men like you were burned at the stake because they shamed the world. Hey look at that! Slade drew from history to show you exactly who you are today, shamed. That’s what it felt like when Shadow beat you right? Well that’s why Santa Craven got you these.
He taps the door where he hung the razor blades.
Slade- Little emo boys like yourself just ‘need’ a push in the right direction. Santa Craven knows you need it, hell the fans need it. While he gave Chris Cyrus a CD begging him not to off himself, because he’s so much fun to make fun of, Santa Craven is asking you to do the world a favor and get it over with. Why? Because the world needs it. Victor you can sit at home stroking your ‘Slammy’ all you want, everyone knows it’s the only thing you’ve ever won.
Craven smirks and makes a wincing look.
Slade- Smarts, don’t it? Merry Christmas butt-munch.
Craven walks away saying his piece. There was no real reason to directly go after Victor, but Slade knew Shadow would appreciate it. Hell Victor was trying to take credit for something he could never do. Slade wouldn’t let that stand. And maybe someday Victor would cross Slade in the ring, and what would happen then? Well Slade used to wrestle for Blood n Guts, that place made Victor seem like the tame Kitten he was. Victor was a joke. But Slade had someone more important to deliver a present to. Craven does not run this time, he just pulls the cloth-bag back up and starts strolling down the hallway. Slade is looking for one person and one person only. Everyone know who it is, everyone knows Slade wants payback against Level One.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After ten minutes Slade Craven is shown still wandering the halls looking for Level One’s locker room. Slade has not found it yet, but maybe that’s because a man like Level One, with all his prestige and balls will just walk into an arena and take whatever locker room he wants. So Slade pauses and walks to an open area with this camera behind him still. Craven turns around and opens the bag up on top of a big box of electrical equipment. Remaining on the cloth is a single, small cardboard box. Slade does not say anything as he turns back to the camera that has followed him through the arena. Instead it looks like he is thinking. Wondering what he needs to say to make his point most effective. So after a few seconds Slade says a very profound statement.
Slade- Level One is a Dick.
He shakes his head.
Slade- Can you honestly ask a man a question how he sleeps at night? You want to know how Slade sleeps? Okay, “The Main Man” sleeps at night in a hot tub full of Jello with two NFL cheerleaders from whatever town he is in, and with the classic music of Dewey Cox playing on an 8 track. Jesus jack ass, why don’t you ask something worth asking. Well maybe you did, you wanted to know why Slade Craven let Shadow retire without him getting a title shot. Well maybe Shadow didn’t give two shits about facing you. He didn’t need to plus all you would do is say the exact same thing, you would just say his name in the place of Slade Craven’s. Yes Shadow did a lot here in A.P.W. in his short time, he wont the Overdrive title twice, he held a winning streak that is second to yours, and sure he could have gone for the world title. But truth is Shadow did what he wanted. And that’s exactly what Slade did. You see, your words about Slade hiding his agenda, waiting to come forward and take the title, that’s because “The Main Man” has more respect for this business than to just show up and demand a title shot. He knows that everyone earns their right to get something, and that’s what Slade did. Craven has gone toe to toe with some of A.P.W’s top superstars, he has fought, won and lost, you know why? Because he is human, the same thing you are sunshine. You see to forget “The Main Man” has been doing this a lot longer than you have, maybe not here, maybe not for the experts, but Slade Craven has been around for damn near a decade, he knows this business better than anyone, he has done more than you could ever dream. Slade doesn’t have to ask you, he knows how you sleep at night, clutching that title wishing people respected you the way they do ole Slade Craven. Deep down inside you know why you had to put that title on the line one more time. You have your secret, your little dark abyss hollowing you inside-out. Come on, you know you want to tell everyone. But we’ll get back to that. Let’s talk about you and your friends, and your big twist at the end of Overdrive last week. Sure Slade walked into a trap, at the start of the show you kept talking about how you wanted to shut them up, and everyone, everyone bought it. The people hoped that you really were planning on beating Cyrus’ and Biggs’ ass along side Slade Craven. Hell the people got to see two of the top superstars in A.P.W. fight side by side, for a second. Slade knew he couldn’t trust you, and he sure as hell didn’t. But maybe, just maybe you would have the integrity to give the people the greatest show in the world. Slade Craven, Level One, imagine it, that’s right, Slade’s name would get top billing jack ass. But you were wrong about your words buttercup. Slade isn’t going to use the match for fuel, no you attack is not important. Its what you would do. You can’t change your nature. No Slade is more pissed you proved yourself a hypocrite. You chastised Slade for not making his agenda known, why didn’t you? You come out under false pretenses then lead everyone into thinking they would get a dream match and then jump Slade because you wanted to leave him broken. Nice job there. Level One, you’re a Dick. But without a doubt you excel at being one. Congratulations.
“The Main Man” pauses for a second.
Slade- So you weaseled your way into the biggest love triangle to ever to rise to power in A.P.W. Congratulations again. Why would you want to run A.P.W? Honestly? You do realize that if A.P.W. were to fall you would forever be known as the man who killed a great federation. Oh wait, isn’t that what you and your homeboy Draedan Darsky want to do? You see, Slade has questions to, his are more important, they are downright investigative. Level One, Slade isn’t content with jack shit, “The Main Man” wants more than you could even understand, however Slade does not enjoy running a federation, he has done it before. Slade does not belong behind a desk, he belongs in the ring. Be proud all you want about taking the reins, then do everyone a favor and remind the people what the hell you did with all that power. Level One, you took the initiative to be the new men running A.P.W, but you didn’t do anything with it. Slade says this, you want to talk about doing something with your career, DO SOMETHING. You had it all, Championship, near unstoppable reign, then you aligned yourself with The Axis. Lets look at this. World Champion, rising star of the year, nearly undefeated streak. Then you got, teaming with Biggs and Cyrus. The tag team that has had there asses handed to them in almost every tag match they were ever in. The weakest stable in A.P.W. Hell Slade and Shadow alone have beaten each of them. Come on man, think about it. There’s a drop off there, a drop off.
Slade slows down and shakes his head. He has been rambling on for a little bit, that cardboard box is still behind him waiting to be shown. Craven has been talking about what Level One said in his monologue. But some of those things he said made absolutely no sense, so Slade needed to address it. Santa Craven is waiting to speak, that present is itching to come out. Slade keeps shaking his head slowly. Level One is the greatest enigma in A.P.W. He is the world champion yet he is a jack ass. Always talking about how the people in this company are beneath him, yet he sides with two of them. Maybe one day Lester will die and donate his brain to science, that way scientists can be as baffled as “The Main Man” is.
Slade- Lester, listen up. “The Main Man” has listened to your petty bullshit before, al you ever do is talk about how everyone is beneath you and how no one deserves that title. But you forget most matches, you rob people of their victories, your worse than a school yard bully and comes this weekend Slade plans on giving you just what you deserve.
Craven reaches back and pulls something out of the box. It’s a pair of silver knuckles. Slade slips them over his fingers.
Slade- Lester, just in case you decide to try and dick around again, Slade wants you to know he doesn’t care. This is a brawl and Craven isn’t out to hurt you, just to teach you a little humility. Lester, you think you’re a god, but Slade says this, you are nothing more than a man and “The Main Man” is going to remind you of that. Bring that title into the ring, see what happens. It may cost Slade the title, but you know what? It will cost you your pride.
Slade clenches his fist around the knuckles and pops his fingers. Slade just sits there. He may not be going straight for the gold, he is going for Level One.
Slade- Just what I wanted!
He folds the jacket up and sets it on the floor next to him, that cold, hard floor. His long pajama lounge pants are green with pictures of Slade Craven on them in his ring corner pose where he leans back and points to himself with both his middle and ring fingers. They are apparel A.P.W. has never marketed. In fact they look a little faded. His name is spelled in black on the pants. His shirt is an original “Rue the Day” shirt. Slade reaches over and opens the next present that’s sitting by him. it’s a blue wrapped gift and we faintly see the card show a cheesy crayon drawing of Slade in the “To” section, with an equally colored Santa in the “From” section. While it may be odd that “The Main Man” is opening presents one month after Christmas, there has to be something to it. Perhaps that Slade was wrestling for Christmas and didn’t get to have one. Maybe he was robbed of his Christmas by a pompous over bearing jackass. It doesn’t matter now though because Slade believes what goes around, sure as hell comes around. He would enjoy taking that title from Level One’s hand. As Slade begins to frantically rip open the box we see the paper fly everywhere. Craven opens the box and pulls out picture. In it is Slade and his Ex Wife Stacy. A reminder of the past. Slade stares at it for a moment as he remembers the days with her by his side. He remembers how she recently got married again, to someone he used to trust and now despised because of his breaking of the guy code. Slade set the photo down. In it Slade stands in a ring with silver ropes and a black mat, he is standing there with Stacy, his arms raised high.
Slade- To better days.
He takes a drink from a bottle of water sitting next to him. Craven still is not drinking. He has been good about everything. As he sits there the camera over his shoulder, well it may not be a camera, it could just be an omniscient viewer. They focus on the picture and the jacket on the floor. Its obvious that Slade is in a non heated place, his breath heats the air. And as the picture moves closer to the viewer Slade becomes blurry. We get a glimpse of the past. Slade’s history. Well, it’s a montage. And its got a great soundtrack! As the montage opens we see ‘The Main Man” and Shadow shake hands in the middle of the A.P.W. ring shortly after Slade beat Hellas in his debut. Then it swiftly cuts to both of them in the ring getting the fans behind them before a match, looks like before the first A.K.A. Tag match. Next after the words are said and the music begins it cuts to Slade Craven walking to the ring along side his tag partner, Shadow. With each step Slade and Shadow take, Shadow begins to fade out of the picture.
Carry on my wayward son,
For there'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Now don't you cry no more
Craven slides under the bottom rope and now he is not in the A.P.W. ring, it has merged with him in an old ring wearing that black and blue flamed jacket with Stacy at his side. He leaps across the ring and begins swinging against an opponent.
Once I rose above the noise and confusion
Just to get a glimpse beyond the illusion
I was soaring ever higher, but I flew too high
Though my eyes could see I still was a blind man
Though my mind could think I still was a mad man
I hear the voices when I'm dreamin',
I can hear them say
As he and the guy trade punches in the ring Slade beats him back to the ropes and shoots him off and turns springboards off the ropes into a moonsault where his ankles wrap around his opponent’s neck into a modified hurricarana. He is shown kicking the opponent in the gut and hitting the Fly Fly. A pin fall scored afterwards. All this playing during the first verse of the song.
Carry on my wayward son,
For there'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Now don't you cry no more
Craven is shown fighting Assassin now inside the Anarchy Cell. Both men brutally taking the match to the next level. Assassin and Slade hitting big move after big move. Craven going through a table. Assassin getting hit with a chair. All the power behind their respect for one another.
Masquerading as a man with a reason
My charade is the event of the season
And if I claim to be a wise man, it surely
means that I don't know
“Slade Craven isn’t here for gold, he is here to whip ass” We hear Slade’s voice over the verse as it starts the second one. We then see Slade making the motion that he is going to be the next champion, marking the belt around his waist. The fans silently roaring in the background against the muted clip. And we hear Level One’s voice. “Now suddenly, The Main Man is all about the gold”
On a stormy sea of moving emotion
Tossed about I'm like a ship on the ocean
I set a course for winds of fortune, but
I hear the voices say
Things get slow as we see the match between Slade Craven and Level One. First it shows both of them just standing there, with Level One’s intentional disrespect. As the chorus draws near and the moment it begins we see Slade slap Level One in the face
Carry on my wayward son,
For there'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Now don't you cry no more! Whoo!
As the chorus plays we see spots where Slade was on top during the match, the drop kick off the ropes, The sling shot over the top, but it doesn’t show the miss. It cuts to Craven throwing the punches in the ring, beating Level One back, then splits over to Craven countering the Darkness Shine into the big DDT, then the Leg Lock DDT, followed by the Multiple German Suplexes The final verse begins to play.
Carry on, you will always remember
Craven hit’s the corkscrew moonsault
Carry on, nothing equals the splendor
He goes for the cover… 2 count!
Now your life's no longer empty
The springboard leg drop!
Surely heaven waits for you
Pin attempt! 2 Count!
Carry on my wayward son,
For there'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Now don't you cry-
As it hits this moment everything slows as Slade is hit with the belt directly in the face.
Don't you cry no more!
As the music plays we see in slow motion, Craven falling back to the ground. And then it shifts to Craven trying to fight his way out of the Level Advance while the music begins to play. It hits and the faces of the people in the crowd turn depressed as the ref’s hand comes down three times. There is a black and white moment as Slade lays in the ring and Level One rolls off as he gets his belt. Then another round of the chorus plays for a moment while we see Slade Craven coming out and taunting Level One for a rematch and the fans.
Carry on my wayward son,
For there'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Now don't you cry no more
Shadow is shown again for a moment faintly walking up the ramp after his match with Chris Cyrus. His back to the stage as Slade lays in the ring after the last overdrive. As the song comes to a close we hear the words faintly “Slade lived in his partner’s shadow, he will never be anything with out him.”
The words are not anyone in A.P.W. it’s a recording from years ago, when Slade first teamed with Shadow. When people thought Shadow was bringing Slade into a new federation. It was not the case, in fact Shadow was bringing in Slade because Slade was looking to branch out after establishing himself as a champion. After those words are spoken everything fades to black. While it looked at first to be an upbeat montage of Slade in A.P.W. showing he can survive on his own, it showed his defeat to Level One at Christmas Chaos. But there was a reason for it. It showed the end of an era. Shadow would not be there to have Slade back anymore, and if “The Main Man” had ever become dependant on having to save his ass, then Craven needed a wake up call. But luckily that wasn’t the case. Craven wrestled for years on his own, with the hounds of hell seeking to take him out. Slade survived them, and he sure as hell was not going to fall before the newly formed love triangle of C.L.B. This wasn’t punishment, it was practice. Slade made his name taking down the power, rebelling against the establishment, upsetting the natural order. And while he sits there on that hard freezing floor we can see that Slade is remembering that Shadow would not want Slade to carry on as the A.K.A. He would want his tag partner to go back to being the man he was years ago, the man he still was, just without any help. Slade was going to raise hell, piss people off and make sure everyone remembered what he stood for, Ass Kicking. Some people pray, others meditate, Slade stomps a mudhole in your ass. That’s what would happen. Craven didn’t need a tag partner, he could look out for himself, and that’s exactly what he would be doing.
Slade- Time to put away childish things.
He picks up the old coat and sets it in the box with his picture of his old wife. Those we the past too. Craven wasn’t going to be like Shadow. He was not going to pull out the old wrestling gear and wear it for luck. Craven didn’t need to call an old friend for help. All Slade had to do was be himself.
Slade- Oh! More presents!
As he drops down and pulls a couple of boxes out from under the table Slade sees that these gifts are not for him.
Slade- What the hell are these doing here? They don’t belong here at all. Santa must have made a mistake. Wait! No! He wants Santa Craven to deliver the presents! Cool, Santa Craven can do that!
There is a giddy look on Slade’s face as he reaches down, grabs the green table cloth that all the food is sitting on. Its mainly celery sticks, carrot sticks, cheeses, crackers and other semi nutritious snacks. Craven grips the cloth tightly and whips it back. All the food goes flying through the old office.
Slade- That looked like it would go differently in the ole head.
Craven has made one hell of a mess. But nevertheless Slade lays the cloth on the ground and tosses the boxes onto the table cloth then begins to pull its up into a bag. He smiles and lifts the bag up slinging it over his shoulder, bolting out the door of the A.K.A. office and down the hall. There is a slight cut as if we are going from real life to something else.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Slade Craven is running through the locker room hallways of Madison Square Garden with the green table cloth pulled up like a sack as he hauls the gifts over his shoulder. As Craven hurries through the halls he passes several crew members and near knocks over quiet a few. While “The Main Man” bustles over people, they yell at him, various versions of the following phrase.
Pissed off Crew People: Where the hell do you think you’re going?!
To which Slade always replied,
Slade- Santa Craven must deliver these present!
It was yelled in such an over the top heroic voice that its safe to assume it baffled the crew people Slade passed. Craven is on a mission n there is a bag full of presents, none meant for him, but if you think well enough, those of you playing the home game already know who they belong to. Suddenly Craven hits the brakes. He literally skids to a stop as his boots slide against the linoleum floor. Slade takes a second to catch his breath then he kicks a door open, it looks to be an established office for President Jeff, who isn’t here right now obviously. Instead the nameplate reads “Axis of Awesome.” Slade steps into the empty office and looks around. There is a camera still following him; it must have been on a dolly track or something. Slade turns to face it and says with a smile.
Slade- Welcome! This is a special follow up issue with “Christmas with Craven” while Slade “The Main Man” Craven has donned his Santa profession once again to deliver toys and presents to the needy. Now while many of you at home may be wondering “Why would professional wrestlers be needy? There is no way they need anything, they have all the money in the world!” Well, that is not exactly the truth, pro wrestlers are still needy, and that’s why “The Main Man” is here today. You see, the Axis needs something, well they need a lot of something so Slade is here to deliver.
Craven swings the bag knocking over everything on the desk and lets the table cloth open up. Inside are several little boxes he begins to pull up the ‘gifts.’ The first is…
Slade- “Not a Douche” By Matthew McConaughey. This is the quintessential book anyone should have. It has a detailed explanation about what makes you a douche, and what you can do to change that. Biggs, Santa Craven feels this would be the perfect gift for you because you are without a doubt…
He picks up a photo of Biggs that has several arrows pointing to it. It shows Biggs standing in the ring in his attire at the start of last week’s Overdrive. The arrows start at the top pointing to his face saying “Smug smile,” then to his shirt, “Gay shirt,” then to his shirt again, “Two sizes too small,” then to his skin, “Too long in tanning bed” and lastly to his hair “Woman’s hair” At the top it reads “Douchebag: Someone with an over-inflated sense of one’s self, low intelligence and does not realize that others around them think they are an ever growing annoyance.”
Slade- A douchebag. Don’t worry though, “The Main Man” understands it’s a disease you have no power to control. Its what made you assume power here in A.P.W. in Jeff’s absence. You have to be a douche bag, its in your blood. And Slade has brought you the gift to help. Perhaps after Survive and Conquer, when you have finished reading this book, you can come out and not pull crap moves with your little buddies, jumping people who remind you what a bitch you are.
He goes to set the book down, put lifts it again, opening it.
Slade- Oh, yeah, it’s got pictures too. Just perfect right? Slade thought you would like this gift.
He sets the book down and pauses briefly before reaching back onto the table cloth.
Slade- For Chris Cyrus, Santa has brought… “Don’t Jump!” The top twenty songs about not killing yourself.
He holds up a two pack CD set.
Slade- Santa felt that after you got your ass handed to you by Shadow in his last match you needed something to remind yourself that you don’t need to kill yourself. While you may be thinking “The Main Man” would get you something to properly edit a damn video, instead Slade knows Santa wanted to give you something to remind you that Shadow beat your ass in his last match. It must suck to know that you never beat Shadow, and he stopped your dreams of being the one man to beat every member of the A.K.A. What’s better is Shadow gets to go down in history as the one man to take out every member of the Axis. Got to suck knowing you allowed that to happen huh? But that’s why Santa got you “Don’t Jump” because everyone in locker room still enjoys making fun of you and doesn’t want to lose that free, and easy, material.
Craven smiles and sets both CDs down on the desk. His smile is still present as he pulls out a black leather mask.
Slade- And for the Beast, to show your true place in the Axis Santa Craven got you a very nice replica of a famous movie prop. This is a replica of the original “Gimp” mask from Tarantino’s Pulp Fiction. With that in mind you to can truly understand your place in your stable as Biggs really has to ask for someone to bring your ass out whenever you make an appearance like last week. You walk like you’re being led by a leash and don’t say much, so naturally “The Main Man” agrees with Santa that this is the best gift you could ever receive. Now, you do not have to thank “The Main Man” for getting these wonderful gifts to you from Santa, because remember, Santa Craven loves helping the needy and guys you really needed this stuff.
Slade bundles the table cloth up again and swings it wide deliberately knocking over a shelf. With a wince Slade watches it crash to the ground the he whips his head to the door and charges out in a heroic fashion.
Slade- Onward!
Craven takes off and continues running down the hallway. He does not run far though. Slade stops in front of a door. He looks at the nameplate, “Victor Hades.” Craven smiles and tries to open it, but the door is locked. Craven tries again, still locked. Slade looks a little bummed. Then he sets the tablecloth bag on the ground. Slade begins rummaging through it.
Slade- Well since Santa Craven is not capable of slipping through chimneys or anything of that sort, not that this asshole has a chimney in there, Anyway, Slade thinks its time to give out Victor’s gift even if that asshole is not here to accept it. Slade will leave it for him, something he needs more than anything.
Craven rummages through the small boxes right quick then stands and grabs some tape slapping it on the back of a small package and slamming it against the door hard. It shows on the camera recording all this.
Slade- Good old fashioned trusty razor blades. Victor do the world a favor and use them. Remember Kitten, its down the road, not across the street.
Craven makes a motion for Victor to pay attention to.
Slade- You might be wondering why “The Main Man” would do such a thing. Well mainly cause like Shadow, Slade Craven thinks Victor is nothing more than an overrated joke. Plus Slade heard what you said about Shadow. Victor the man who pays for his women, well maybe they are women if you look closely it looks like there is a bump in that throat. Anyway. Victor. You think you were the man to end Shadow. Its exactly why Shadow didn’t walk after Christmas Chaos. You forget he came back and beat someone else’s ass, and more over look at what it took for you to even have a chance to beat him? This first time, you didn’t have all your little toys in the ring, to had to have something to level the playing field so to speak. But that’s what people like you do. And that’s why Slade says this. Victor you think Shadow and “The Main Man” rode on Brokeback Mountain? That’s really what you’re thinking about? Seems like its what’s really on your mind. Back in the middle ages men like you were burned at the stake because they shamed the world. Hey look at that! Slade drew from history to show you exactly who you are today, shamed. That’s what it felt like when Shadow beat you right? Well that’s why Santa Craven got you these.
He taps the door where he hung the razor blades.
Slade- Little emo boys like yourself just ‘need’ a push in the right direction. Santa Craven knows you need it, hell the fans need it. While he gave Chris Cyrus a CD begging him not to off himself, because he’s so much fun to make fun of, Santa Craven is asking you to do the world a favor and get it over with. Why? Because the world needs it. Victor you can sit at home stroking your ‘Slammy’ all you want, everyone knows it’s the only thing you’ve ever won.
Craven smirks and makes a wincing look.
Slade- Smarts, don’t it? Merry Christmas butt-munch.
Craven walks away saying his piece. There was no real reason to directly go after Victor, but Slade knew Shadow would appreciate it. Hell Victor was trying to take credit for something he could never do. Slade wouldn’t let that stand. And maybe someday Victor would cross Slade in the ring, and what would happen then? Well Slade used to wrestle for Blood n Guts, that place made Victor seem like the tame Kitten he was. Victor was a joke. But Slade had someone more important to deliver a present to. Craven does not run this time, he just pulls the cloth-bag back up and starts strolling down the hallway. Slade is looking for one person and one person only. Everyone know who it is, everyone knows Slade wants payback against Level One.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After ten minutes Slade Craven is shown still wandering the halls looking for Level One’s locker room. Slade has not found it yet, but maybe that’s because a man like Level One, with all his prestige and balls will just walk into an arena and take whatever locker room he wants. So Slade pauses and walks to an open area with this camera behind him still. Craven turns around and opens the bag up on top of a big box of electrical equipment. Remaining on the cloth is a single, small cardboard box. Slade does not say anything as he turns back to the camera that has followed him through the arena. Instead it looks like he is thinking. Wondering what he needs to say to make his point most effective. So after a few seconds Slade says a very profound statement.
Slade- Level One is a Dick.
He shakes his head.
Slade- Can you honestly ask a man a question how he sleeps at night? You want to know how Slade sleeps? Okay, “The Main Man” sleeps at night in a hot tub full of Jello with two NFL cheerleaders from whatever town he is in, and with the classic music of Dewey Cox playing on an 8 track. Jesus jack ass, why don’t you ask something worth asking. Well maybe you did, you wanted to know why Slade Craven let Shadow retire without him getting a title shot. Well maybe Shadow didn’t give two shits about facing you. He didn’t need to plus all you would do is say the exact same thing, you would just say his name in the place of Slade Craven’s. Yes Shadow did a lot here in A.P.W. in his short time, he wont the Overdrive title twice, he held a winning streak that is second to yours, and sure he could have gone for the world title. But truth is Shadow did what he wanted. And that’s exactly what Slade did. You see, your words about Slade hiding his agenda, waiting to come forward and take the title, that’s because “The Main Man” has more respect for this business than to just show up and demand a title shot. He knows that everyone earns their right to get something, and that’s what Slade did. Craven has gone toe to toe with some of A.P.W’s top superstars, he has fought, won and lost, you know why? Because he is human, the same thing you are sunshine. You see to forget “The Main Man” has been doing this a lot longer than you have, maybe not here, maybe not for the experts, but Slade Craven has been around for damn near a decade, he knows this business better than anyone, he has done more than you could ever dream. Slade doesn’t have to ask you, he knows how you sleep at night, clutching that title wishing people respected you the way they do ole Slade Craven. Deep down inside you know why you had to put that title on the line one more time. You have your secret, your little dark abyss hollowing you inside-out. Come on, you know you want to tell everyone. But we’ll get back to that. Let’s talk about you and your friends, and your big twist at the end of Overdrive last week. Sure Slade walked into a trap, at the start of the show you kept talking about how you wanted to shut them up, and everyone, everyone bought it. The people hoped that you really were planning on beating Cyrus’ and Biggs’ ass along side Slade Craven. Hell the people got to see two of the top superstars in A.P.W. fight side by side, for a second. Slade knew he couldn’t trust you, and he sure as hell didn’t. But maybe, just maybe you would have the integrity to give the people the greatest show in the world. Slade Craven, Level One, imagine it, that’s right, Slade’s name would get top billing jack ass. But you were wrong about your words buttercup. Slade isn’t going to use the match for fuel, no you attack is not important. Its what you would do. You can’t change your nature. No Slade is more pissed you proved yourself a hypocrite. You chastised Slade for not making his agenda known, why didn’t you? You come out under false pretenses then lead everyone into thinking they would get a dream match and then jump Slade because you wanted to leave him broken. Nice job there. Level One, you’re a Dick. But without a doubt you excel at being one. Congratulations.
“The Main Man” pauses for a second.
Slade- So you weaseled your way into the biggest love triangle to ever to rise to power in A.P.W. Congratulations again. Why would you want to run A.P.W? Honestly? You do realize that if A.P.W. were to fall you would forever be known as the man who killed a great federation. Oh wait, isn’t that what you and your homeboy Draedan Darsky want to do? You see, Slade has questions to, his are more important, they are downright investigative. Level One, Slade isn’t content with jack shit, “The Main Man” wants more than you could even understand, however Slade does not enjoy running a federation, he has done it before. Slade does not belong behind a desk, he belongs in the ring. Be proud all you want about taking the reins, then do everyone a favor and remind the people what the hell you did with all that power. Level One, you took the initiative to be the new men running A.P.W, but you didn’t do anything with it. Slade says this, you want to talk about doing something with your career, DO SOMETHING. You had it all, Championship, near unstoppable reign, then you aligned yourself with The Axis. Lets look at this. World Champion, rising star of the year, nearly undefeated streak. Then you got, teaming with Biggs and Cyrus. The tag team that has had there asses handed to them in almost every tag match they were ever in. The weakest stable in A.P.W. Hell Slade and Shadow alone have beaten each of them. Come on man, think about it. There’s a drop off there, a drop off.
Slade slows down and shakes his head. He has been rambling on for a little bit, that cardboard box is still behind him waiting to be shown. Craven has been talking about what Level One said in his monologue. But some of those things he said made absolutely no sense, so Slade needed to address it. Santa Craven is waiting to speak, that present is itching to come out. Slade keeps shaking his head slowly. Level One is the greatest enigma in A.P.W. He is the world champion yet he is a jack ass. Always talking about how the people in this company are beneath him, yet he sides with two of them. Maybe one day Lester will die and donate his brain to science, that way scientists can be as baffled as “The Main Man” is.
Slade- Lester, listen up. “The Main Man” has listened to your petty bullshit before, al you ever do is talk about how everyone is beneath you and how no one deserves that title. But you forget most matches, you rob people of their victories, your worse than a school yard bully and comes this weekend Slade plans on giving you just what you deserve.
Craven reaches back and pulls something out of the box. It’s a pair of silver knuckles. Slade slips them over his fingers.
Slade- Lester, just in case you decide to try and dick around again, Slade wants you to know he doesn’t care. This is a brawl and Craven isn’t out to hurt you, just to teach you a little humility. Lester, you think you’re a god, but Slade says this, you are nothing more than a man and “The Main Man” is going to remind you of that. Bring that title into the ring, see what happens. It may cost Slade the title, but you know what? It will cost you your pride.
Slade clenches his fist around the knuckles and pops his fingers. Slade just sits there. He may not be going straight for the gold, he is going for Level One.
