Post by Mark Mania on May 20, 2010 13:48:58 GMT -4
-The scene opens in a hotel outside of Tacoma, Washington. Crazy Joe is standing in the bathroom wearing a bathrobe and still wearing his mask despite the fact that he’s attempting to shave. He starts shaving on the left side of his face and immediately drops the air and grabs his face as though he’s cut it. He looks back up, and into the mirror that the camera is focused on and smirks. He walks out of the bathroom and into the main part of his hotel room. As panning around the hotel room the room is very large and seems to have at least two adjoining rooms. There is one door that is shut and written on it, apparently with magic marker is the name “Bill”. Crazy Joe continues to walk towards the back of his hotel room and finally sits down on the window sill, still in his bathrobe.-
Crazy Joe: Mayhem is a mere few days away and as I remain calm, cool, and collected I hope of you to cooperate while I point out the contradiction that causes us to be complex, cautious, and committed to chaos. Let me offer congratulations on the competition of the collected masses, while some remain content with the consensus of crazy cannibals, it’s easy to overlook my clever charisma as I remain comfortable with the constant contact that exists between two competitors, let me not criticize the crimson camisole that has engulfed this corporation but rather condemn the cooperation of calmness in the face of chaos. Mayhem is the effect, chaos is the cause. Let us connect as we compete, collected and crazy.
-Crazy Joe reacts to himself of what he just said. He shakes his head as he attempts to figure out what it all means.-
Crazy Joe: Shit that was a lot of “c”’s. What was I really talking about? Well let me explain. I care not for the condition of this company but rather for the chaos it creates. Oh wait, not that again. What I’m trying to say is, I may not being seeing the bigger picture in the APW right now, but also, I’m not interested in that bigger picture. I’m interested in the amount of Mayhem that can be caused in one night. After beating the tar out of Jazzy Jeff the first time I faced him, I knew that I would get another shot at actually beating him officially. I mean, in reality, that wasn’t a very close match at all. I just really wanted to beat on him. Which, apparently has been my problem to date. I forget who it was that I faced this past week, but damn, I could not believe he pulled off that little move and pinned me. I mean granted, I’m pretty sure I didn’t know that you could win by pinning someone, I thought I had to get a knock-out, so that put a damper on things. All this really means is that at Mayhem, there is going to be exactly that…mayhem. I’m not going to dance around the match here and say that all I’m worried about is just causing pain, because it’s different this time. I want to win. It’s starting to get my blood boiling and frankly, I love this damn feeling. The drive to win, the drive to succeed. I forgot all about this damn emotion. I was so caught up in causing pain, I forgot what life is really about. Life is about freaking winning. And damn it, if I remember correctly, I’m a winner.
-Crazy Joe turns his back to the camera and drops the bathrobe, his back is covered in scars much like his chest was. He puts on a pair of boxer briefs and a pair of black dress pants.-
Crazy Joe: I’ll tell you one thing, my lackluster start here in APW has apparently caused some people to really start underestimating me, and I don’t respond well to that. I mean, obviously it’s going to come back to bite them, but the fact that I have to defend myself, it’s a tough job. In Japan, I could do whatever I wanted and was just left the hell alone. Now, while I may be causing bruises and bleeding, I really need to start causing some losing. What more perfect time to start than now? This just seems like the perfect opportunity for me to come out on a big stage and take Jazzy Jeff’s big mouth, and shut it the hell up. That’s all it ever is with this guy, talk, talk, talk. And all he’s doing is just begging for respect. I thought I explained this to him effectively the first time we were about to square off, but apparently not. So here’s the deal Jazzy Jeff, you don’t get respect by asking for it. Let me reiterate that. You don’t get any goddamn respect by asking for it. So enough of your bullshit “I’m the best, who’s next” routine. Because you know what, as new as I am, and as little that I may know about APW, I know one thing for sure. You’re not worth the damn paper your name is printed on. You’re not a “wanna-be” or a “has-been”, you’re a “never-will-be”. You’re too interested in what people think about you and how people treat you. Well let me make it clear to you. No one is going to respect you, because you’re not any good. You don’t know what the hell you’re doing in the ring, and you certainly don’t know what the hell you’re doing with a microphone. I mean, God man, the second someone hears you talking they might as well blow their brains out because the alternative of listening to you whine and complain about how no one respects you is everyone’s personal hell.
-Crazy Joe puts on a white under shirt.-
Crazy Joe: There are a lot of different things people think of the land of Hell. People think fire and brimstone; people think a red devil with horns, a tail, and a trident. People think of a lake of fire and the cruelest types of people that ever existed. Other types of people think that each person has a personal hell. If you hate snakes, your hell will be an eternity with snakes. You don’t like heights; your eternity will be falling from tall things. Now, whatever belief you may have, and I respect all beliefs, let me make one thing apparent to everyone. No beating around the bush here, the main facet of hell, is Jimmy Jazz. So, be good now, because if not, you will have to spend an eternity listening to the constant dribble that is Jimmy Jazz.
-Crazy Joe puts a red button down shirt on over his undershirt.-
Crazy Joe: So, now with Mayhem, only a few days away, I’m started to get really excited. The opportunities seem endless, and what’s even better, is I’m starting to remember. Oh how glorious it is. I met a man from my past a few days ago. He claims that at one point I was his manager. He claims that I used to be someone important. Now, while I don’t fully buy into that, it’s certainly an intriguing development in the story of my life. Me, someone important? How strange to hear. But, I must not delve too far into the past, for the future is still what drives me. I’ve decided without a shadow of doubt, the only thing I care about now is winning. I don’t care how I do it, what it takes, or what happens to me on the way. But I know one thing is for sure. I am going to win this damn match. Jazzy Jeff can do whatever he wants, he can whip out the Bitch & Complain Slam, or whatever his finishing move is, I don’t give a damn, he can bring all he’s got. And the only thing he’s going to be rewarded with is a big fat loss. I don’t care if I barely beat him, or if I send him to the hospital. I am going to win, and I will begin my ascension to the top of the ranks in APW. I’m not going to let some little nobody walk around yapping his mouth at everyone get away with it. I’m going to kick him right in the damn mouth, and then drive his head to the mat. So take refuge in this Jazzy Jeff, this time around, I don’t just care about hurting you, I care about winning. So, if you value your life, just come into the ring, inform the referee that you quit, and then go about your business, writing out press releases about how you just managed to have a successful bowel movement.
-The hotel phone starts to ring. Crazy Joe looks at it bewildered. He walks calmly over to answer it.-
Crazy Joe: Hello?
Bill: Damn! It is you, you bad mutha!
Crazy Joe: Excuse me who is this?
Bill: It’s Bill! I think my associate Mike called you the other day. I can’t believe it’s really you, you’ve been gone forever man, where the hell have you been?
Crazy Joe: Well, Bill, if you must ask, I was actually over in Japan wrestling in a few circuits over there.
Bill: You were wrestling this whole time? Damn man! We missed you over here. Mike and I have hung it up since we were two time tag champions in the last fed. We haven’t known what to do without you around.
Crazy Joe: Bill, I apologize, but I truly have no idea who you are. I actually don’t remember a single thing that happened to me prior to wrestling in Japan. All I knew is that I knew how to wrestle and that I enjoyed causing pain.
Bill: Are you joking with me right now? You’ve been wrestling for over a decade. The first eight years of which were spent purely in the States.
Crazy Joe: Well, it’s damn good to know that I was originally from the States, I couldn’t tell from my white skin, arrogant attitude, and enormous height. Silly me, thought I was from Japan.
Bill: You’ve always been a sarcastic bastard.
-As Crazy Joe is on the phone, he’s tying a black tie around his red shirt.-
Crazy Joe: Listen here Bill… I’m sorry I didn’t get your last name.
Bill: You really are screwed up. It’s Gnarly. Bill Gnarly.
Crazy Joe: Well, that’s an odd last name, seems a little cheap. Well, regardless, listen here Bill Gnarly, I don’t remember you well, or even really at all, but in the never-ending pursuit of finding out who I really am I would love to meet with you. Are you going to be around this weekend at all?
Bill: Well, I don’t see why the hell not. I’m in North Carolina with Mike right now.
Crazy Joe: Oh, damn, well, that’s the other side of the country, apparently we’ll have to do it another time. I’m wrestling in an event in Tacoma.
Bill: You’re wrestling again?! Well, hot damn, I’m going to have to see this. Do you mind if we take the company jet out there?
Crazy Joe: What are you talking about?
Bill: Oh shit, you don’t even know, do you? Well, yeah, you have a company jet. And, well, we’re taking it to get to Tacoma this weekend. Hell, I can be there tomorrow. Man, we have a lot to catch you up on.
Crazy Joe: Well, I’m very intrigued to find out exactly what is going on Bill. But I can’t spend too much time with you, I’ve had a rough go of it the past couple of weeks and haven’t been winning. I’ve been causing some serious pain, but the victories aren’t coming with it.
Bill: Well if you only care about winning now, then you’re starting to remember more than I thought. You just need to stay focused on what is truly important, and that is power. Power through respect, power through honor, or power through force. Power is what is most important. Keep that in mind while you’re out there and you will be absolutely golden. Oh man, I can’t wait to see you again. What a blast we’ll have, get a keg!
-Crazy Joe hangs up the phone without saying anything else. He tightens his tie and looks at himself in the mirror.-
Crazy Joe: I’m not exactly sure what is going on, but what I am sure about is my motivation. I’m going to walk into that arena in Tacoma, Washington and I am going to light the place up. I’m going to fight through blood, sweat, and tears, and I am going to win. I don’t care if I get beaten within an inch of my life. All I need is a pulse, and that’s enough to drive me to win. Bill mentioned the climb for power. But it’s not only about Power, it’s about Glory. It’s about seeing your name in the lights and seeing the crowd all around you, hanging on your every move. Ah yes, Power and Glory. Oh, how time has passed.
-Crazy Joe puts his head down, and the scene fades out.-
Crazy Joe: Mayhem is a mere few days away and as I remain calm, cool, and collected I hope of you to cooperate while I point out the contradiction that causes us to be complex, cautious, and committed to chaos. Let me offer congratulations on the competition of the collected masses, while some remain content with the consensus of crazy cannibals, it’s easy to overlook my clever charisma as I remain comfortable with the constant contact that exists between two competitors, let me not criticize the crimson camisole that has engulfed this corporation but rather condemn the cooperation of calmness in the face of chaos. Mayhem is the effect, chaos is the cause. Let us connect as we compete, collected and crazy.
-Crazy Joe reacts to himself of what he just said. He shakes his head as he attempts to figure out what it all means.-
Crazy Joe: Shit that was a lot of “c”’s. What was I really talking about? Well let me explain. I care not for the condition of this company but rather for the chaos it creates. Oh wait, not that again. What I’m trying to say is, I may not being seeing the bigger picture in the APW right now, but also, I’m not interested in that bigger picture. I’m interested in the amount of Mayhem that can be caused in one night. After beating the tar out of Jazzy Jeff the first time I faced him, I knew that I would get another shot at actually beating him officially. I mean, in reality, that wasn’t a very close match at all. I just really wanted to beat on him. Which, apparently has been my problem to date. I forget who it was that I faced this past week, but damn, I could not believe he pulled off that little move and pinned me. I mean granted, I’m pretty sure I didn’t know that you could win by pinning someone, I thought I had to get a knock-out, so that put a damper on things. All this really means is that at Mayhem, there is going to be exactly that…mayhem. I’m not going to dance around the match here and say that all I’m worried about is just causing pain, because it’s different this time. I want to win. It’s starting to get my blood boiling and frankly, I love this damn feeling. The drive to win, the drive to succeed. I forgot all about this damn emotion. I was so caught up in causing pain, I forgot what life is really about. Life is about freaking winning. And damn it, if I remember correctly, I’m a winner.
-Crazy Joe turns his back to the camera and drops the bathrobe, his back is covered in scars much like his chest was. He puts on a pair of boxer briefs and a pair of black dress pants.-
Crazy Joe: I’ll tell you one thing, my lackluster start here in APW has apparently caused some people to really start underestimating me, and I don’t respond well to that. I mean, obviously it’s going to come back to bite them, but the fact that I have to defend myself, it’s a tough job. In Japan, I could do whatever I wanted and was just left the hell alone. Now, while I may be causing bruises and bleeding, I really need to start causing some losing. What more perfect time to start than now? This just seems like the perfect opportunity for me to come out on a big stage and take Jazzy Jeff’s big mouth, and shut it the hell up. That’s all it ever is with this guy, talk, talk, talk. And all he’s doing is just begging for respect. I thought I explained this to him effectively the first time we were about to square off, but apparently not. So here’s the deal Jazzy Jeff, you don’t get respect by asking for it. Let me reiterate that. You don’t get any goddamn respect by asking for it. So enough of your bullshit “I’m the best, who’s next” routine. Because you know what, as new as I am, and as little that I may know about APW, I know one thing for sure. You’re not worth the damn paper your name is printed on. You’re not a “wanna-be” or a “has-been”, you’re a “never-will-be”. You’re too interested in what people think about you and how people treat you. Well let me make it clear to you. No one is going to respect you, because you’re not any good. You don’t know what the hell you’re doing in the ring, and you certainly don’t know what the hell you’re doing with a microphone. I mean, God man, the second someone hears you talking they might as well blow their brains out because the alternative of listening to you whine and complain about how no one respects you is everyone’s personal hell.
-Crazy Joe puts on a white under shirt.-
Crazy Joe: There are a lot of different things people think of the land of Hell. People think fire and brimstone; people think a red devil with horns, a tail, and a trident. People think of a lake of fire and the cruelest types of people that ever existed. Other types of people think that each person has a personal hell. If you hate snakes, your hell will be an eternity with snakes. You don’t like heights; your eternity will be falling from tall things. Now, whatever belief you may have, and I respect all beliefs, let me make one thing apparent to everyone. No beating around the bush here, the main facet of hell, is Jimmy Jazz. So, be good now, because if not, you will have to spend an eternity listening to the constant dribble that is Jimmy Jazz.
-Crazy Joe puts a red button down shirt on over his undershirt.-
Crazy Joe: So, now with Mayhem, only a few days away, I’m started to get really excited. The opportunities seem endless, and what’s even better, is I’m starting to remember. Oh how glorious it is. I met a man from my past a few days ago. He claims that at one point I was his manager. He claims that I used to be someone important. Now, while I don’t fully buy into that, it’s certainly an intriguing development in the story of my life. Me, someone important? How strange to hear. But, I must not delve too far into the past, for the future is still what drives me. I’ve decided without a shadow of doubt, the only thing I care about now is winning. I don’t care how I do it, what it takes, or what happens to me on the way. But I know one thing is for sure. I am going to win this damn match. Jazzy Jeff can do whatever he wants, he can whip out the Bitch & Complain Slam, or whatever his finishing move is, I don’t give a damn, he can bring all he’s got. And the only thing he’s going to be rewarded with is a big fat loss. I don’t care if I barely beat him, or if I send him to the hospital. I am going to win, and I will begin my ascension to the top of the ranks in APW. I’m not going to let some little nobody walk around yapping his mouth at everyone get away with it. I’m going to kick him right in the damn mouth, and then drive his head to the mat. So take refuge in this Jazzy Jeff, this time around, I don’t just care about hurting you, I care about winning. So, if you value your life, just come into the ring, inform the referee that you quit, and then go about your business, writing out press releases about how you just managed to have a successful bowel movement.
-The hotel phone starts to ring. Crazy Joe looks at it bewildered. He walks calmly over to answer it.-
Crazy Joe: Hello?
Bill: Damn! It is you, you bad mutha!
Crazy Joe: Excuse me who is this?
Bill: It’s Bill! I think my associate Mike called you the other day. I can’t believe it’s really you, you’ve been gone forever man, where the hell have you been?
Crazy Joe: Well, Bill, if you must ask, I was actually over in Japan wrestling in a few circuits over there.
Bill: You were wrestling this whole time? Damn man! We missed you over here. Mike and I have hung it up since we were two time tag champions in the last fed. We haven’t known what to do without you around.
Crazy Joe: Bill, I apologize, but I truly have no idea who you are. I actually don’t remember a single thing that happened to me prior to wrestling in Japan. All I knew is that I knew how to wrestle and that I enjoyed causing pain.
Bill: Are you joking with me right now? You’ve been wrestling for over a decade. The first eight years of which were spent purely in the States.
Crazy Joe: Well, it’s damn good to know that I was originally from the States, I couldn’t tell from my white skin, arrogant attitude, and enormous height. Silly me, thought I was from Japan.
Bill: You’ve always been a sarcastic bastard.
-As Crazy Joe is on the phone, he’s tying a black tie around his red shirt.-
Crazy Joe: Listen here Bill… I’m sorry I didn’t get your last name.
Bill: You really are screwed up. It’s Gnarly. Bill Gnarly.
Crazy Joe: Well, that’s an odd last name, seems a little cheap. Well, regardless, listen here Bill Gnarly, I don’t remember you well, or even really at all, but in the never-ending pursuit of finding out who I really am I would love to meet with you. Are you going to be around this weekend at all?
Bill: Well, I don’t see why the hell not. I’m in North Carolina with Mike right now.
Crazy Joe: Oh, damn, well, that’s the other side of the country, apparently we’ll have to do it another time. I’m wrestling in an event in Tacoma.
Bill: You’re wrestling again?! Well, hot damn, I’m going to have to see this. Do you mind if we take the company jet out there?
Crazy Joe: What are you talking about?
Bill: Oh shit, you don’t even know, do you? Well, yeah, you have a company jet. And, well, we’re taking it to get to Tacoma this weekend. Hell, I can be there tomorrow. Man, we have a lot to catch you up on.
Crazy Joe: Well, I’m very intrigued to find out exactly what is going on Bill. But I can’t spend too much time with you, I’ve had a rough go of it the past couple of weeks and haven’t been winning. I’ve been causing some serious pain, but the victories aren’t coming with it.
Bill: Well if you only care about winning now, then you’re starting to remember more than I thought. You just need to stay focused on what is truly important, and that is power. Power through respect, power through honor, or power through force. Power is what is most important. Keep that in mind while you’re out there and you will be absolutely golden. Oh man, I can’t wait to see you again. What a blast we’ll have, get a keg!
-Crazy Joe hangs up the phone without saying anything else. He tightens his tie and looks at himself in the mirror.-
Crazy Joe: I’m not exactly sure what is going on, but what I am sure about is my motivation. I’m going to walk into that arena in Tacoma, Washington and I am going to light the place up. I’m going to fight through blood, sweat, and tears, and I am going to win. I don’t care if I get beaten within an inch of my life. All I need is a pulse, and that’s enough to drive me to win. Bill mentioned the climb for power. But it’s not only about Power, it’s about Glory. It’s about seeing your name in the lights and seeing the crowd all around you, hanging on your every move. Ah yes, Power and Glory. Oh, how time has passed.
-Crazy Joe puts his head down, and the scene fades out.-
