Post by Chris Cyrus on Aug 27, 2010 21:10:19 GMT -4
Chris Cyrus and Biggs are kicking it, hanging out in the den of Biggs' Seattle home. It's a rather large room decorated with all sorts of “Star Wars” memorabilia, such as action figures, toy vehicles, and a display case full of light saber handles. The two men are huddled together, and Cyrus has a phone in his hand. It's ringing.
Male Voice: Hello, thank you for calling APW Administrative Offices.
Cyrus: Hello, I'm trying to get a hold of somebody who works there, but I don't have their extension.
Voice: No problem. I can look it up for you! Their name?
Cyrus: First name Amanda, last name Hugginkiss.
Voice: I'll check the directory.
Biggs and Cyrus snicker lightly as the attendant puts them on hold. After a few moments, they're back on the phone.
Voice: It seems that I can't find Amanda Hugginkiss.
Cyrus: Maybe your standards are too high!
At this point, Biggs and Cyrus crack up and hang up the phone. Ellie comes walking in at this point, and immediately notices the two of them doubling over in laughter with the phone on the floor. She rolls her eyes.
Ellie: Please tell me you two weren't crank calling the front office again! Especially you, Gary. We've got two weeks until our wedding, and you should be helping with the planning!
Cyrus makes a cracking noise as he does the “whipped” motion with his hands. Biggs shakes his head towards his good friend, and then looks up towards Ellie, shrugging his shoulders as he does so.
Biggs: What's there left to plan? We've already got the decorations for the ring figured out. We have a banquet room in the arena rented out until 1:00 am for the reception, and we've hired all three photographers you wanted! All the food is paid for and set for delivery, and you have your dress, not that I've seen it yet, but Cyrus keeps bragging about how awesome it is! We have front row tickets for our moms and dads to the show, and all the rest of our friends and family have 100 level seats, and Level-One has promised me that he'd make some of his brownies for the reception as well. Everything's covered, you can relax.
Ellie: I know, I know. I just want it to be perfect, that's all.
Biggs gets up to his feet at this point and places both hands on Ellie's shoulders, looking his fiancé right in the eyes.
Biggs: And it will be. Even if something goes wrong here or there, it will be perfect, because at the end of the day, we'll be married, and I can't think of a more perfect way to end a day than that.
This just melts Ellie's heart, and she gives Biggs a huge hug. Cyrus comes over and jabs Biggs in the ribs with his elbow.
Cyrus: If you think the day is going to be perfect, just wait until the night! Hehehe!
Biggs and Ellie both get perturbed looks on their faces.
Cyrus: I'm just sayin'... Still, bro, we got to get going soon. We got a couple of hours until the bachelor party begins.
Biggs: Listen, Chris, how many times have I told you that I don't need a bachelor party, especially this long before the actual wedding! Even if I wanted one, wouldn't it make sense to have it a bit closer to the wedding?
Cyrus: Who said I was throwing you just one bachelor party?
Ellie: Christopher! We agreed that you could throw him one bachelor party, especially considering what you've got planned! I think one will be all he's able to handle!
Cyrus: Okay, okay! Still, I've already paid for tonight's party, so I guess there's no better time than the present to celebrate!
Biggs: Okay, now I'm scared.
Cyrus: You should be!
Cyrus lets out a hearty laugh as Ellie giggles, and Biggs looks slightly annoyed.
Ellie: You guys stay safe, alright?
Cyrus: Fat chance!
Ellie gives her fiance a quick peck on the cheek, and Cyrus leans in for one too. Ellie obliges, and Cyrus is seemingly on Cloud 9 as he and Biggs leave the den and head to the car.
The scene opens up with Chris Cyrus and a blind folded Biggs getting out of a limo. Its Friday Night and its nighttime. The two stand on the sidewalk.
Biggs: Ok Chris, where am I?
Chris: it’s a surprise.
Biggs: Just tell me.
Chris: Just trust me, yours going to love your bachelor Party.
Biggs: You better not be messing with me here.
Chris: Just give me your arm so you don’t fall and break your neck.
Chris slowly walks up some steps with Biggs holding on to Chris’s arm and they enter a building. The camera then pans up to a flashing neon sign that says “NUDE GIRLS LIVE XXX.” We cut inside the strip club where techno music is playing. Women, barely wearing anything are walking around with trays in their hands, serving drinks. Chris has a big smile on his face as he looks around.
Biggs: What’s with the music? This better not be joke where you bring me to a gay bar.
Chris: Even better Biggs. Take your blind fold off.
Biggs takes off his blind fold and a waitress with huge boobs, bigger than Biggs head walks by him. Biggs is quick to put his hands over his eyes.
Biggs: CHRIS! Why did you bring me here.
Chris: it’s a bachelor party man. This is was bachelor parties are. Guys hanging out at a nudity bar.
Biggs: You and I both know that Ellie wouldn’t approve of this.
Chris: Lighten up. Ellie is cool man. This is your last chance at freedom.
Biggs: Chris, get me out of here please.
Chris: Come on, one of your best friends is here. Look.
Biggs spreads open his index and middle finger that’s covering his eyes and he see’s former Axis member, The Beast, at the end of a stage where a stripper is dancing. Biggs is quick to cover his eyes back up.
Chris: See Biggs, it’s a party. Now lets get something to drink.
Biggs: Chris….
Chris: Just have a seat Biggs and I’ll get you a diet coke.
Chris guides Biggs to a table and sits him at a chair by himself right next to the stage as Chris heads towards the bar counter. Biggs sits there with his eyes still covered, reminding himself that he’s marrying Ellie in two week. The song that’s playing ends and the DJ introduces the next girl.
DJ: Our next girl just came from an all girl school. Please Welcome, ALEXIA.
A different Techno song begins to play as a hot looking blonde wearing a school girls out fit comes out and heads straight to the stripper pole and starts working her magic. She then spots Biggs. She dances her way to Biggs, taking her top off while doing so. She gets off the stage and starts dancing around Biggs. Biggs still has his eyes covered and has no idea what’s happening. Alexia then sits on Bigg lap and starts grinding her butt into Bigg’s crotch. Biggs opens his eyes and see’s the sexy Stripper and jumps back, tipping his chair over and falling to the ground. Biggs quickly gets up and tries getting away but bumps into Chris with the drinks.
Chris: Where you heading?
Biggs: I gotta get out of here man.
Chris: Just relax and have fun.
Biggs: Thanks for everything Chris. I know you mean well, but I think I should go.
Chris: I had something planned for you though.
Biggs: We got a big match this Sunday. We shouldn’t be partying. We should be resting up and preparing for this match. it’s the biggest match of our career as a tag team.
Chris: At least let me show you what I had planned.
Biggs: Fine. But make it quick.
Chris: Follow me, and keep your eyes open. You’re a grown man. Looking at boobies never killed anyone.
Chris leads the way as Biggs follows him through a crowd of people. Biggs keeping his head to the ground. They go into a back room where there’s a little stage and on the ends of the stage are two cages with girls dancing in them.
Chris: Just ignore the girls Biggs, their part of the room. But look up.
Bigg’s looks up and see’s a banner hanging that say’s “FIRST CONTACT” on it and there’s two comfy chair on the stage. Biggs looks to his side and see’s APW Cameraman there.
Biggs: Wait a second. You brought me to a strip club to do a First Contact video. Why couldn’t we have just done this at like your place.
Chris: I wanted to go to the nudiy bar tonight and I knew you’d rather cut a promo, do I figured I’d kill two birds with one stone.
Biggs: Your one strange man Chris Cyrus.
Chris: Lets get this done partner.
Chris and Biggs sit in their chairs and the APW cameraman begins to record.
Biggs: Hello APW Faithful and welcome to a special edition of First Contact.
Chris: We are live here from “Morts Stripclub’ for Biggs Bachelor party.
Biggs: Just for the record. I was tricked into coming here against my own free will.
Chris: While Biggs is a party pooper, We are here to address our opponents for our match at Shockwave.
Biggs: The return of the APW Tag Team Titles. Fatal four way match. The Sports Nutz Verses The Ass Kickers Anonymous Verses The Red Shield Mafia Verses The Axis of Awesome.
Chris: You know something. I’ve been excited for this match ever since the Tag Titles we’re involved. Because I got a special place in my heart for the APW Tag Titles. I’m the only man in APW to be a two time Tag team Champion. Which officially makes me not only the greatest Xtreme Champion of all time, but the greatest Tag Team Champion of all time. And what’s even more impressive, Twice I carried Jason Royce to championship gold. I’d like to see someone else do that. For you guys who don’t know who Jason Royce is, go do your homework, because I carried Hardcore Ice to two tag team championship reigns. I’m the perfect partner and with my best friend as my partner for this match on Sunday. There’s going to me no me carrying the team or Biggs carrying the team. Together, we are a unit and there’s no one that can stop us.
Biggs: Together, Chris Cyrus and I have done everything together.
Chris: Well, not EVERYTHING.
Biggs looks at Chris, giving him the “Shut up or I’m gonna kick your ass look” before looking back at the camera
Biggs: Chris and I have been running Overdrive Together. We’ve be a dominate team in APW for over a year. And the only thing we’ve haven’t been able to do is win a championship together. And This Sunday, our dream will come true. Because we will win. There’s no doubt about it. Because looking at our competition, there is no competition.
Chris: Exactly Biggs. First, The Sports Nutz. Sure, maybe the beat us like a month ago, but you know what, nothing was at stake in that match. It was a throw away match. But now that we’re fighting for something. Things will be different. You guys may have won many matches since coming to APW, but none of those matches mean anything until this one on Sunday. But the question I have for you guys is, can you win it when it counts? Do you guys have what it takes. Because Biggs and I know we do. Personally, I don’t think you guys can. Because first of all. One half of the Sports Nutz is a big fat blob, George Dunpork. Hey George, A hot dog eating Contest isn’t a sport. Maybe you should give a few to your partner, he could use some extra weight. And a message to your little manager, Gordon Heath, if you think for a second of sticking your nose in this match, Biggs, Myself or even Ellie will have no problem taking you out and putting you in your place. So remember that this Sunday.
Biggs: The Red Shield Mafia. You align yourself with Greatness and you think your worthy of a tag team title shot? What have you done for a title shot. Who have you beaten. I know you guys think your big shots because your tag team champions in IWF, but here in APW. Your nothing and the Red Shield Mafia are a bunch of losers. This is the big leagues boys and your just little boys. Little boys who will get their butts handed to them on a silver platter. Young Mannie, J.R Kingston, you boys my be friends with The Sports Nutz, but remember this. Its every team for themselves and at some point, you’ll have to decide. What’s more important. The APW Tag Titles or your Friendship. And I’m sure we all know the answer to that. But like we told Gordon Heath, same thing applies to Damien Walker.
Chris: And last but not least, The AKA. Assassin and Slade. We made an alliance. But that doesn’t make us friends. Its all just you watch our back, we’ll watch yours, only because the Greatness and the Red Shield Mafia joined forces. But in this match, its every team for themselves and we have no problem beating the snot out of your two has-beens if it means winning the Tag Titles. Last year at Shockwave, The Axis of Awesome came out on top over the AKA. And who would have thought a year later, that we’d have the opportunity to do the same. AKA, You heard rumors of Tag Titles coming back to APW and you got the bright idea that you’d get yourselves involved and try to get a title. Well guess what. You just made the biggest mistake of your career. Because, the Biggs and I, we want those titles and we will stop at nothing to get them.
Biggs: Let's face the facts here, when you think of dominant duos in APW History, no other name comes to mind than The Axis of Awesome! At Shockwave, we're just making things official when we win the APW Tag Team Titles! And it is a when, not an if. The neutered AKA doesn't stand a chance, and the super faction of The Sports Nutz and Red Shield Mafia will implode upon itself, negating any advantage they may have had in merging in the first place!
Cyrus: Plus we don't call ourselves the Axis of Awesome for nothing!
Biggs: Exactly. Because when you're as Awesome as we are, it's no wonder that the wrestling world revolves around us! APW is our world, and our opponents at Shockwave are just living in it. Because when you've got somebody like me who's out of this world...
Cyrus: And somebody who'll send you straight to hell, well that just makes the two of us...
Both: AWESOME!
With that said, the scene fades to black.
Male Voice: Hello, thank you for calling APW Administrative Offices.
Cyrus: Hello, I'm trying to get a hold of somebody who works there, but I don't have their extension.
Voice: No problem. I can look it up for you! Their name?
Cyrus: First name Amanda, last name Hugginkiss.
Voice: I'll check the directory.
Biggs and Cyrus snicker lightly as the attendant puts them on hold. After a few moments, they're back on the phone.
Voice: It seems that I can't find Amanda Hugginkiss.
Cyrus: Maybe your standards are too high!
At this point, Biggs and Cyrus crack up and hang up the phone. Ellie comes walking in at this point, and immediately notices the two of them doubling over in laughter with the phone on the floor. She rolls her eyes.
Ellie: Please tell me you two weren't crank calling the front office again! Especially you, Gary. We've got two weeks until our wedding, and you should be helping with the planning!
Cyrus makes a cracking noise as he does the “whipped” motion with his hands. Biggs shakes his head towards his good friend, and then looks up towards Ellie, shrugging his shoulders as he does so.
Biggs: What's there left to plan? We've already got the decorations for the ring figured out. We have a banquet room in the arena rented out until 1:00 am for the reception, and we've hired all three photographers you wanted! All the food is paid for and set for delivery, and you have your dress, not that I've seen it yet, but Cyrus keeps bragging about how awesome it is! We have front row tickets for our moms and dads to the show, and all the rest of our friends and family have 100 level seats, and Level-One has promised me that he'd make some of his brownies for the reception as well. Everything's covered, you can relax.
Ellie: I know, I know. I just want it to be perfect, that's all.
Biggs gets up to his feet at this point and places both hands on Ellie's shoulders, looking his fiancé right in the eyes.
Biggs: And it will be. Even if something goes wrong here or there, it will be perfect, because at the end of the day, we'll be married, and I can't think of a more perfect way to end a day than that.
This just melts Ellie's heart, and she gives Biggs a huge hug. Cyrus comes over and jabs Biggs in the ribs with his elbow.
Cyrus: If you think the day is going to be perfect, just wait until the night! Hehehe!
Biggs and Ellie both get perturbed looks on their faces.
Cyrus: I'm just sayin'... Still, bro, we got to get going soon. We got a couple of hours until the bachelor party begins.
Biggs: Listen, Chris, how many times have I told you that I don't need a bachelor party, especially this long before the actual wedding! Even if I wanted one, wouldn't it make sense to have it a bit closer to the wedding?
Cyrus: Who said I was throwing you just one bachelor party?
Ellie: Christopher! We agreed that you could throw him one bachelor party, especially considering what you've got planned! I think one will be all he's able to handle!
Cyrus: Okay, okay! Still, I've already paid for tonight's party, so I guess there's no better time than the present to celebrate!
Biggs: Okay, now I'm scared.
Cyrus: You should be!
Cyrus lets out a hearty laugh as Ellie giggles, and Biggs looks slightly annoyed.
Ellie: You guys stay safe, alright?
Cyrus: Fat chance!
Ellie gives her fiance a quick peck on the cheek, and Cyrus leans in for one too. Ellie obliges, and Cyrus is seemingly on Cloud 9 as he and Biggs leave the den and head to the car.
**********
The scene opens up with Chris Cyrus and a blind folded Biggs getting out of a limo. Its Friday Night and its nighttime. The two stand on the sidewalk.
Biggs: Ok Chris, where am I?
Chris: it’s a surprise.
Biggs: Just tell me.
Chris: Just trust me, yours going to love your bachelor Party.
Biggs: You better not be messing with me here.
Chris: Just give me your arm so you don’t fall and break your neck.
Chris slowly walks up some steps with Biggs holding on to Chris’s arm and they enter a building. The camera then pans up to a flashing neon sign that says “NUDE GIRLS LIVE XXX.” We cut inside the strip club where techno music is playing. Women, barely wearing anything are walking around with trays in their hands, serving drinks. Chris has a big smile on his face as he looks around.
Biggs: What’s with the music? This better not be joke where you bring me to a gay bar.
Chris: Even better Biggs. Take your blind fold off.
Biggs takes off his blind fold and a waitress with huge boobs, bigger than Biggs head walks by him. Biggs is quick to put his hands over his eyes.
Biggs: CHRIS! Why did you bring me here.
Chris: it’s a bachelor party man. This is was bachelor parties are. Guys hanging out at a nudity bar.
Biggs: You and I both know that Ellie wouldn’t approve of this.
Chris: Lighten up. Ellie is cool man. This is your last chance at freedom.
Biggs: Chris, get me out of here please.
Chris: Come on, one of your best friends is here. Look.
Biggs spreads open his index and middle finger that’s covering his eyes and he see’s former Axis member, The Beast, at the end of a stage where a stripper is dancing. Biggs is quick to cover his eyes back up.
Chris: See Biggs, it’s a party. Now lets get something to drink.
Biggs: Chris….
Chris: Just have a seat Biggs and I’ll get you a diet coke.
Chris guides Biggs to a table and sits him at a chair by himself right next to the stage as Chris heads towards the bar counter. Biggs sits there with his eyes still covered, reminding himself that he’s marrying Ellie in two week. The song that’s playing ends and the DJ introduces the next girl.
DJ: Our next girl just came from an all girl school. Please Welcome, ALEXIA.
A different Techno song begins to play as a hot looking blonde wearing a school girls out fit comes out and heads straight to the stripper pole and starts working her magic. She then spots Biggs. She dances her way to Biggs, taking her top off while doing so. She gets off the stage and starts dancing around Biggs. Biggs still has his eyes covered and has no idea what’s happening. Alexia then sits on Bigg lap and starts grinding her butt into Bigg’s crotch. Biggs opens his eyes and see’s the sexy Stripper and jumps back, tipping his chair over and falling to the ground. Biggs quickly gets up and tries getting away but bumps into Chris with the drinks.
Chris: Where you heading?
Biggs: I gotta get out of here man.
Chris: Just relax and have fun.
Biggs: Thanks for everything Chris. I know you mean well, but I think I should go.
Chris: I had something planned for you though.
Biggs: We got a big match this Sunday. We shouldn’t be partying. We should be resting up and preparing for this match. it’s the biggest match of our career as a tag team.
Chris: At least let me show you what I had planned.
Biggs: Fine. But make it quick.
Chris: Follow me, and keep your eyes open. You’re a grown man. Looking at boobies never killed anyone.
Chris leads the way as Biggs follows him through a crowd of people. Biggs keeping his head to the ground. They go into a back room where there’s a little stage and on the ends of the stage are two cages with girls dancing in them.
Chris: Just ignore the girls Biggs, their part of the room. But look up.
Bigg’s looks up and see’s a banner hanging that say’s “FIRST CONTACT” on it and there’s two comfy chair on the stage. Biggs looks to his side and see’s APW Cameraman there.
Biggs: Wait a second. You brought me to a strip club to do a First Contact video. Why couldn’t we have just done this at like your place.
Chris: I wanted to go to the nudiy bar tonight and I knew you’d rather cut a promo, do I figured I’d kill two birds with one stone.
Biggs: Your one strange man Chris Cyrus.
Chris: Lets get this done partner.
Chris and Biggs sit in their chairs and the APW cameraman begins to record.
Biggs: Hello APW Faithful and welcome to a special edition of First Contact.
Chris: We are live here from “Morts Stripclub’ for Biggs Bachelor party.
Biggs: Just for the record. I was tricked into coming here against my own free will.
Chris: While Biggs is a party pooper, We are here to address our opponents for our match at Shockwave.
Biggs: The return of the APW Tag Team Titles. Fatal four way match. The Sports Nutz Verses The Ass Kickers Anonymous Verses The Red Shield Mafia Verses The Axis of Awesome.
Chris: You know something. I’ve been excited for this match ever since the Tag Titles we’re involved. Because I got a special place in my heart for the APW Tag Titles. I’m the only man in APW to be a two time Tag team Champion. Which officially makes me not only the greatest Xtreme Champion of all time, but the greatest Tag Team Champion of all time. And what’s even more impressive, Twice I carried Jason Royce to championship gold. I’d like to see someone else do that. For you guys who don’t know who Jason Royce is, go do your homework, because I carried Hardcore Ice to two tag team championship reigns. I’m the perfect partner and with my best friend as my partner for this match on Sunday. There’s going to me no me carrying the team or Biggs carrying the team. Together, we are a unit and there’s no one that can stop us.
Biggs: Together, Chris Cyrus and I have done everything together.
Chris: Well, not EVERYTHING.
Biggs looks at Chris, giving him the “Shut up or I’m gonna kick your ass look” before looking back at the camera
Biggs: Chris and I have been running Overdrive Together. We’ve be a dominate team in APW for over a year. And the only thing we’ve haven’t been able to do is win a championship together. And This Sunday, our dream will come true. Because we will win. There’s no doubt about it. Because looking at our competition, there is no competition.
Chris: Exactly Biggs. First, The Sports Nutz. Sure, maybe the beat us like a month ago, but you know what, nothing was at stake in that match. It was a throw away match. But now that we’re fighting for something. Things will be different. You guys may have won many matches since coming to APW, but none of those matches mean anything until this one on Sunday. But the question I have for you guys is, can you win it when it counts? Do you guys have what it takes. Because Biggs and I know we do. Personally, I don’t think you guys can. Because first of all. One half of the Sports Nutz is a big fat blob, George Dunpork. Hey George, A hot dog eating Contest isn’t a sport. Maybe you should give a few to your partner, he could use some extra weight. And a message to your little manager, Gordon Heath, if you think for a second of sticking your nose in this match, Biggs, Myself or even Ellie will have no problem taking you out and putting you in your place. So remember that this Sunday.
Biggs: The Red Shield Mafia. You align yourself with Greatness and you think your worthy of a tag team title shot? What have you done for a title shot. Who have you beaten. I know you guys think your big shots because your tag team champions in IWF, but here in APW. Your nothing and the Red Shield Mafia are a bunch of losers. This is the big leagues boys and your just little boys. Little boys who will get their butts handed to them on a silver platter. Young Mannie, J.R Kingston, you boys my be friends with The Sports Nutz, but remember this. Its every team for themselves and at some point, you’ll have to decide. What’s more important. The APW Tag Titles or your Friendship. And I’m sure we all know the answer to that. But like we told Gordon Heath, same thing applies to Damien Walker.
Chris: And last but not least, The AKA. Assassin and Slade. We made an alliance. But that doesn’t make us friends. Its all just you watch our back, we’ll watch yours, only because the Greatness and the Red Shield Mafia joined forces. But in this match, its every team for themselves and we have no problem beating the snot out of your two has-beens if it means winning the Tag Titles. Last year at Shockwave, The Axis of Awesome came out on top over the AKA. And who would have thought a year later, that we’d have the opportunity to do the same. AKA, You heard rumors of Tag Titles coming back to APW and you got the bright idea that you’d get yourselves involved and try to get a title. Well guess what. You just made the biggest mistake of your career. Because, the Biggs and I, we want those titles and we will stop at nothing to get them.
Biggs: Let's face the facts here, when you think of dominant duos in APW History, no other name comes to mind than The Axis of Awesome! At Shockwave, we're just making things official when we win the APW Tag Team Titles! And it is a when, not an if. The neutered AKA doesn't stand a chance, and the super faction of The Sports Nutz and Red Shield Mafia will implode upon itself, negating any advantage they may have had in merging in the first place!
Cyrus: Plus we don't call ourselves the Axis of Awesome for nothing!
Biggs: Exactly. Because when you're as Awesome as we are, it's no wonder that the wrestling world revolves around us! APW is our world, and our opponents at Shockwave are just living in it. Because when you've got somebody like me who's out of this world...
Cyrus: And somebody who'll send you straight to hell, well that just makes the two of us...
Both: AWESOME!
With that said, the scene fades to black.
