Post by JD Storm on Feb 22, 2011 23:32:11 GMT -4
Scene opens at an expensive studio. The place is filled with nothing but the best, most expensive equipment available. Most of the equipment is worth more then a modest home. Several people are moving about like crazy, making sure everything is perfect. Lighting, the sound, the angle of the cameras.....everything. Nothing is being left to chance.
Sitting in a recliner, on the stage, is "Superstar" Bobby Bodacious. Bobby sits comfortably, looking smug, as a make-up woman is applying the last bit of make-up to Bodacious, in order for him to look perfect for the video. A producer is counting down for the filming. As he signals "one", Bodacious begins to speak.
"Superstar" Bobby Bodacious
Greetings, peons. You know who I am. I'm the greatest pure athlete to enter an IWC ring. I'm certainly the most intelligent & most sophisticated individual in professional wrestling, today. Women want me. Men wish they could be me. I am the one true Superstar, not only in IWC, but everywhere I go. From Hollywood to Hell's Kitchen, the Florida Keys to the frozen Prudhoe Bay. Everyone knows who I am. Everyone admires & respects the greatness that is "Superstar" Bobby Bodacious.
Even imbiciles like Madok Mortalis wishes he could be more like myself. He's certainly trying. I'll give him that much. He's desperately trying to be just like myself. Try as he might, try as he may, Madok's best efforts just don't come close enough. He just can't pull it off. How he managed to get this far as IWC's Tap Out Champion is nothing short of a miracle. It almost makes me believe in God. How else can you explain the title run that Madok has enjoyed, thus far? Sure wasn't because of talent. Madok doesn't have enough talent to get by this long, with any kind of championship belt.
Sure wasn't because of luck. Gambler's pretty much cornered that market. Don't worry, Gambler, I'll get to you in a few minutes. Honestly, there's not enough luck to keep either man in a career, or job, for this long. Some might blame politics. Some choose to blame bribery. Maybe they beat Reginald at Guitar Hero.
I'm sorry, but I really need to go off track for a moment. What the hell's wrong with you, Reg? A dance-off with Hurricane Jeff? Pardon my language, but is this shit for real? Hurricrap Jeff barely kept that piece of tin called the NSCW Championship, back when it was still in operation. Only thing saving him then was a lack of talent from the rest of the roster. And now, you're dancing with him? I seriously pray that neither one of you brings out the Village People CDs. UGHHHHH!
Maybe Madok would like to get involved with the festivities, since he's going to have an easier schedule after Blood, Sweat & Broken Teeth. He's certainly going to be carrying around a lot less baggage.
Speaking of baggage, do you really think you need anymore baggage, Gambler? You can barely get in your junker of a car as it is. Your walker is still buried behind a mound of garbage, old clothes & empty bottles of bourbon. Plus, you really have no purpose for the Tap Out Championship Belt. It's monetary value isn't that high. No decent casino will give you a line of credit on it. Even the rundown, disease ridden casinos won't take it as collateral.
I know what you're thinking, man. You could always try to pawn it, somewhere. Really, you could try it. Pretty sure Chumlee isn't gullible enough to do it. Even that dimwit shows moments of intelligence. You won't get enough money for a cheap bottle of crappy beer.
Quite simply, there's only one man deserving of the IWC Tap Out Championship. The one man that can and will make IWC a respectable promotion, a promotion that even the Parents Television Council can approve of. I am IWC's messiah, the savior for each & every one of you. I'm the man that will make it possible for everyone here to earn a respectable paycheck, as well as thump APW in it's inter-promotional show in the near future. I am "Superstar" Bobby Bodacious, the greatest man to ever grace an IWC ring and future Tap Out Champion!
The director yells "that's a wrap" as everyone is hustling & bustling in the studio. Scene fades to black.
Sitting in a recliner, on the stage, is "Superstar" Bobby Bodacious. Bobby sits comfortably, looking smug, as a make-up woman is applying the last bit of make-up to Bodacious, in order for him to look perfect for the video. A producer is counting down for the filming. As he signals "one", Bodacious begins to speak.
"Superstar" Bobby Bodacious
Greetings, peons. You know who I am. I'm the greatest pure athlete to enter an IWC ring. I'm certainly the most intelligent & most sophisticated individual in professional wrestling, today. Women want me. Men wish they could be me. I am the one true Superstar, not only in IWC, but everywhere I go. From Hollywood to Hell's Kitchen, the Florida Keys to the frozen Prudhoe Bay. Everyone knows who I am. Everyone admires & respects the greatness that is "Superstar" Bobby Bodacious.
Even imbiciles like Madok Mortalis wishes he could be more like myself. He's certainly trying. I'll give him that much. He's desperately trying to be just like myself. Try as he might, try as he may, Madok's best efforts just don't come close enough. He just can't pull it off. How he managed to get this far as IWC's Tap Out Champion is nothing short of a miracle. It almost makes me believe in God. How else can you explain the title run that Madok has enjoyed, thus far? Sure wasn't because of talent. Madok doesn't have enough talent to get by this long, with any kind of championship belt.
Sure wasn't because of luck. Gambler's pretty much cornered that market. Don't worry, Gambler, I'll get to you in a few minutes. Honestly, there's not enough luck to keep either man in a career, or job, for this long. Some might blame politics. Some choose to blame bribery. Maybe they beat Reginald at Guitar Hero.
I'm sorry, but I really need to go off track for a moment. What the hell's wrong with you, Reg? A dance-off with Hurricane Jeff? Pardon my language, but is this shit for real? Hurricrap Jeff barely kept that piece of tin called the NSCW Championship, back when it was still in operation. Only thing saving him then was a lack of talent from the rest of the roster. And now, you're dancing with him? I seriously pray that neither one of you brings out the Village People CDs. UGHHHHH!
Maybe Madok would like to get involved with the festivities, since he's going to have an easier schedule after Blood, Sweat & Broken Teeth. He's certainly going to be carrying around a lot less baggage.
Speaking of baggage, do you really think you need anymore baggage, Gambler? You can barely get in your junker of a car as it is. Your walker is still buried behind a mound of garbage, old clothes & empty bottles of bourbon. Plus, you really have no purpose for the Tap Out Championship Belt. It's monetary value isn't that high. No decent casino will give you a line of credit on it. Even the rundown, disease ridden casinos won't take it as collateral.
I know what you're thinking, man. You could always try to pawn it, somewhere. Really, you could try it. Pretty sure Chumlee isn't gullible enough to do it. Even that dimwit shows moments of intelligence. You won't get enough money for a cheap bottle of crappy beer.
Quite simply, there's only one man deserving of the IWC Tap Out Championship. The one man that can and will make IWC a respectable promotion, a promotion that even the Parents Television Council can approve of. I am IWC's messiah, the savior for each & every one of you. I'm the man that will make it possible for everyone here to earn a respectable paycheck, as well as thump APW in it's inter-promotional show in the near future. I am "Superstar" Bobby Bodacious, the greatest man to ever grace an IWC ring and future Tap Out Champion!
The director yells "that's a wrap" as everyone is hustling & bustling in the studio. Scene fades to black.
