Post by khaos on Mar 23, 2011 18:40:17 GMT -4
The sound of steel slamming into steel fills the space and jolts him from his slumber. A familiar stale smell of sweat and piss fills his nostrils, immediately telling his brain that he was back on cell block d. He opens his eyes and finds himself staring into the psychotic gaze of Rico Suave, the Puerto Ricans nauseatingly foul breath mixing with the cell block’s potpourri. Rico’s pupils are dilated so large that they begin to swallow his cocoa colored irises like black holes, his Hispanic junkie cellmate is obviously using again.
Rico pulled the shank from under his mattress. It was made from a spoon that someone stole from the kitchen and he had bought it from a one eyed Ukrainian bank robber for a pack of smokes. It was supposed to be his protection from the gangs and crazy assholes like Rico, but now the Puerto Rican was jabbing the shank into his lower back aiming for the kidney.
Khaos wakes up screaming and finds himself bathed in early morning sunlight. Sweat soaked through his penguin pajama pants and the scar in his side briefly burned as if someone had touched a branding iron to his skin. It had been nearly five years since Rico attacked him, and the mentally ill little man had long since been executed. He hadn’t given any thought to the man that almost killed him until the dreams started. Now the “Seven Mile Slasher” was constantly on his mind.
Delores came out of the bathroom with a cold washcloth and a concerned look on her face. She washes his face with gentleness a mother would show an infant and carefully strips him out of his wet clothes. She kisses him on the lips tenderly and he tries to make it more passionate but she pulls away from his embrace.
Delores: We don’t have time for that this morning.
Khaos: We have plenty of time, it’s only seven thirty.
Delores: Have you forgotten what today is?
Khaos: No I haven’t forgotten what today is. I just like to be reminded why I’m doing this every once in a while.
Delores: I’m pretty sure I reminded you twice yesterday and at least once a day for the past two weeks. So get you butt in the shower because we have to meet Gary at the stadium at ten.
Khaos: I thought Gary was scouting talent back east.
Delores: He was, but he called last night after you went to bed and said management asked him to fly out to watch the dark matches tonight. So he is going to meet us at ten to go over pointers for the match.
Khaos once again kisses her, this time letting his lips wander down to her pulse. A romantic gesture she normally cannot resist. She lets out a gently moan that quickly turns into a shriek.
Delores: Chris! I told you we didn’t have time for that this morning.
Khaos: You can’t blame a guy for trying can you.
He gives her his best shit eating grin that instantly makes her forget that she’s mad at him before standing up and walking into the plush five star hotel bathroom. He turns on the water in the gigantic shower as hot as he can stand and sticks his head back out into the room.
Khaos: Would you please come wash my back?
Delores: You don’t give up do you?
Khaos: Not when I really want something.
Delores: Well I’ve already showered so you’ll just have to wash your own back… and front.
Delores had changed out of her pajamas and into a very smart navy blue business suit that showed off all of her ample assets well by the time he climbed out of the shower. Since taking over as his manager he had seen a whole new side of her emerge. He had always thought of her as a sexy little punk rock chick, but she was also a confident and intelligent business woman that took to the wrestling world like a duck to water. If he managed to go anywhere in APW it would have just as much to do with her backstage wrangling as his in ring ability.
She had laid his clothes out for him on the bed; a pair of black slacks with a thin silver pinstripe, a black Misfits t-shirt and a black velvet tuxedo jacket. He wasn’t sure where the clothes had come from but they fit him like a glove and he had to admit that he looked good. He was beginning to wish he had something to put on his feet besides his old beat to hell Chuck Taylor All Stars when he looked down and saw a box on the floor. He ripped off the lid to discover a pair of rattle snake skin boots and his face lit up like a kid on Christmas morning.
Delores: I hope you like them.
Khaos: I love them baby. This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me, thank you.
A tear ran down his cheek.
Delores: Well I saw how you looked like a slob compared to all of the other wrestlers and decided you needed a little bit of a makeover. So I went shopping and found clothes that I thought you would look good in with out looking like a yuppie.
Khaos slide the boots onto his size fourteen feet and nearly had a glory fit at how comfortable they were. He stood and took his lady by the hand and they walked out of the hotel room. They skipped the lobby and went straight to the valet parking area where a young man in a fugly burgundy uniform fetched their car, a 2011 Toyota Prius. He had wanted a Cadillac or at least an SUV of some sort, but Delores told him that if they wanted to stay in the expensive hotel they had to drive the cheap rental car.
The drive to the stadium was perfect. Ziggy Stardust was playing and the northern California sunshine helped take the spring chill out of the air. The past month spent traveling up and down the coast of the Golden State had made him think of forsaking his beloved Detroit for a home on the west coast. In a couple years when he was main eventing Rasslemania he could buy Delores a big house on the hill overlooking the ocean with enough room for two point five kids. Tonight he had to focus on the other has beens and never will bes booked in the battle royal. He had to focus because a title shot was on the line and Gary had been drilling the golden rule into his head for the past seven months. You know the rule; he who has the gold makes all the rules.
Delores parked the silver Toyota in the staff parking lot and they walked into the hallowed halls of Memorial Stadium holding hands. “Glittering” Gary Kowolski meets them inside the door with smiles and hugs and leads them into a cramped but well lit office that will serve as their dressing room for the day.
“Glittering” Gary: It’s a hell of a lot nicer than that janitor’s closet you got dressed in back in Sacramento. You’re moving up in the world kid and tonight you move your self all the way up into the title picture.
Delores: Gary don’t you be inflating his ego. He has a big night tonight and we need him focused on the battle royal not some hypothetical title match.
“Glittering” Gary: Delores you ever been in bed with a champion?
Delores: No but I did get drunk and fool around with some of the girls on my team when we won the Midwest championship last year.
The jaw of the fiery trainer hits the floor and Delores gives him a smile as sweet as honey.
Delores: You boys go over whatever strategy needs going over while I go find out what the schedule for the day is going to be. I know the show starts at five but I’m going to try and get you an interview. I think you need to get your face out there a little bit more, besides beating the hell out of girls and guys in masks.
She walks out of the room leaving her giant of a boyfriend alone with the gnarled veteran that is responsible for getting him to APW.
“Glittering” Gary: You have a good girl there kid. Even if she says things that make this old sailor blush.
Khaos: Yeah she is a good girl. I mean come on how many girls do you know would wait six years for a guy to get out of prison.
“Glittering” Gary: Honestly kid I know a lot of girls that would wait six years for a guy to get out of prison, but most of them are bat shit crazy. Delores is different because she’s not some psycho bitch that gets off on the fact that you killed a guy. She really loves you kid.
Khaos: I really love her too. I just wish I never killed that guy because we’ve lost six years because of it. I spent six years wondering if I was going to die because I lost it and beat the life out of a man.
“Glittering” Gary: You didn’t beat the life out of a man, kid. You beat the life out of a no good pimp that struck that beautiful woman that just walked out here. Any man that lays his hands on a woman deserves to be beaten to death and ran through a wood chipper.
Khaos: How am I any better than that guy? Did you see what I did in the ring a couple of weeks ago? I did more than just slap a woman, Gary.
“Glittering” Gary: What you did was wrestle a match. You did you job and got a pretty decent pay day for it I might add. You didn’t book yourself against a woman and you sure as hell didn’t do it for fun. You are nothing like that pig you killed, and if you say that again I’m going to kick your ass. I might be old as dirt but I got one more ass kicking in me. So sit your ass down and let’s talk about this match before the brains of the operation comes back and steals you from me.
The nearly seven foot tall ex-con folds himself into a steel chair and looks his mentor in the eyes.
“Glittering” Gary: Ok kid a battle royal is unlike any match you have ever been in before. The rules are simple; you throw anybody and everybody over the top rope. The strategies are a whole lot different than any other match. You have to constantly watch your back because everyone is gunning for you, especially you because you’re a big guy. People love to team up and go after the big guys early on in the match, because they think it gives them a better chance of winning.
Khaos: So keep my head on a swivel and be prepared to fight off two or three people at a time.
“Glittering” Gary: Exactly kid. If I were you I would stay as close to the middle of the ring as possible and conserve energy. Battle royals are the marathon of wrestling and I’ve seen a lot of wrestlers start out like wild fire only to peter out half way through and get tossed out on their asses.
Khaos: Got it. Keep my head on a swivel, stay in the middle of the ring and conserve energy. Anything else I should know?
“Glittering” Gary: Well the only other thing I can think to tell you is if you get a chance get out on the floor. You won’t get eliminated if you don’t go over the top rope and you can’t go over the top rope if your ass is on the floor. The fans will boo ya and some of the boys in the back might call you a chicken shit, but screw ‘em if it gets you a title shot.
The door opens and Delores walks in to the room. “Glittering” Gary stands and gives her a kiss on the cheek.
“Glittering” Gary: You take good care of him, he’s a good man.
He walks out of the room.
Delores: Well get your game face on. A camera man will be here in a couple of minutes to shoot a quick promo. Do you know what you want to say?
Khaos: I have a couple of ideas. I figure I’ll just wing it like I did speeches in school, what’s the worst that can happen?
Delores: Well ok. Just remember that I love no matter how bad of a promo you cut.
Khaos: I love you too, and thanks a bunch for the support.
She laughs that reminds Khaos a little bit of Betty Rubble before a knock at the door brings him back to reality. She answers it and a guy wearing an APW Staff t-shirt and carrying a camera walks into the room.
Cameraman: Alright Khaos this is how this is going to work. I’ll say action and you start talking. If you mess up we can start over, but please don’t mess up too many times. We have 40 people to shoot today and the other handicam guy is back at the hotel hung over. You cool?
Khaos: Yeah I’m cool.
The cameraman hoists the camera up onto his shoulder.
Cameraman: Action!
Khaos: Tonight is the biggest night in professional wrestling. It’s not taking place in Atlanta and it sure as hell ain’t taking place in Florida. No the biggest night in professional wrestling is coming to you live from historic Memorial Stadium on the Campus of the University of California in beautiful Berkley. Tonight is Rasslemania VII and at least one Mega Star will become a legend in this business.
We have hardcore matches, we have ladder matches, we have cage matches, hell we have guys taping their firsts and rolling them in broken glass matches; and I’m in a match with a bunch of Misfits. Do you think it’s by accident that I am wearing the t-shirt of one of the greatest, nay the greatest hardcore punk band? Do you think it is a coincidence that it says Misfits under the skull on my t-shirt? Hell no! Nothing is by accident here because I wanted to show you bingo hall wannabes what a real misfit looks like. You see I was a misfit before being a misfit was cool.
I was the kid in high school dressed in all black with the Buddy Holly glasses. I was the kid listening to music that went out of style before he was even born while everyone else was listening to Nstync and the Backdoor Boys. I was the kid that was bullied and picked on mercilessly until I got to be bigger than everyone else. I lived in shitty trailer park foster homes because my mom was a crack whore and didn’t even know who my real father was, but chances are he was either dead or in prison.
I am what a misfit looks like, not some “blue blood” pretty boy. I am the true face of a misfit, not a degenerate gambler that looks old enough to be my grandfather. Look deep into my eyes and you will see that I have no fear for the misfits. I spent six years of my life locked up on death row. I am used to surviving amongst the misfits and tonight should be no different.
So that leaves only my fellow APW Mega Stars. A motley assortment of wrestlers if there was ever one assembled. We have masked freaks, beautiful women, ham and eggers, jabronis and ten times losers. So if my calculations are correct, and I am very good at math, this match is a bearded lady short of a Coney Island Freak Show. What is that you say? We don’t have Cujo the Dog Faced Boy? Sure we do, why you think Fire Dragon wears a mask. We even have a sword swallower in Alexandra Callaway, because let’s be brutally honest she had to swallow something to get this far in professional wrestling. So I think we have all the bases covered, except for a bearded lady. Well I guess Bobby Bodacious has a little starter beard so we have that too.
I guess what I’m getting at is tonight I will be inside of the ring with a bunch of Misfits and freak show geeks. We are taking professional wrestling back to its carnival roots, but this match isn’t going to be some county fair. No tonight you are going to be witnessing a carnival of carnage with me as the ring leader. Tonight the winner of the battle royal isn’t going to be the guy that throws the most people over the top rope. No tonight the winner is going to be the guy that is willing to do the most violence upon his fellow man. To win tonight someone is going to have to be willing to kill me and I don’t think they have the guts. That’s what sets me apart from the pack, I am willing to kill for what I want and I’ve been on death row to prove it.
So tonight before you step into that ring with me each and every one of you needs to ask yourselves one question. Do I have what it takes to turn a predator into prey? Do you have what it takes to best The Natural Born Killer? Well do you?
Cameraman: Cut! That’s pretty good.
Khaos: I know.
Delores: Baby that was amazing. I’ll be right back.
Delores runs out of the room and slams the door.
The scene fades to black.
Rico pulled the shank from under his mattress. It was made from a spoon that someone stole from the kitchen and he had bought it from a one eyed Ukrainian bank robber for a pack of smokes. It was supposed to be his protection from the gangs and crazy assholes like Rico, but now the Puerto Rican was jabbing the shank into his lower back aiming for the kidney.
Khaos wakes up screaming and finds himself bathed in early morning sunlight. Sweat soaked through his penguin pajama pants and the scar in his side briefly burned as if someone had touched a branding iron to his skin. It had been nearly five years since Rico attacked him, and the mentally ill little man had long since been executed. He hadn’t given any thought to the man that almost killed him until the dreams started. Now the “Seven Mile Slasher” was constantly on his mind.
Delores came out of the bathroom with a cold washcloth and a concerned look on her face. She washes his face with gentleness a mother would show an infant and carefully strips him out of his wet clothes. She kisses him on the lips tenderly and he tries to make it more passionate but she pulls away from his embrace.
Delores: We don’t have time for that this morning.
Khaos: We have plenty of time, it’s only seven thirty.
Delores: Have you forgotten what today is?
Khaos: No I haven’t forgotten what today is. I just like to be reminded why I’m doing this every once in a while.
Delores: I’m pretty sure I reminded you twice yesterday and at least once a day for the past two weeks. So get you butt in the shower because we have to meet Gary at the stadium at ten.
Khaos: I thought Gary was scouting talent back east.
Delores: He was, but he called last night after you went to bed and said management asked him to fly out to watch the dark matches tonight. So he is going to meet us at ten to go over pointers for the match.
Khaos once again kisses her, this time letting his lips wander down to her pulse. A romantic gesture she normally cannot resist. She lets out a gently moan that quickly turns into a shriek.
Delores: Chris! I told you we didn’t have time for that this morning.
Khaos: You can’t blame a guy for trying can you.
He gives her his best shit eating grin that instantly makes her forget that she’s mad at him before standing up and walking into the plush five star hotel bathroom. He turns on the water in the gigantic shower as hot as he can stand and sticks his head back out into the room.
Khaos: Would you please come wash my back?
Delores: You don’t give up do you?
Khaos: Not when I really want something.
Delores: Well I’ve already showered so you’ll just have to wash your own back… and front.
Delores had changed out of her pajamas and into a very smart navy blue business suit that showed off all of her ample assets well by the time he climbed out of the shower. Since taking over as his manager he had seen a whole new side of her emerge. He had always thought of her as a sexy little punk rock chick, but she was also a confident and intelligent business woman that took to the wrestling world like a duck to water. If he managed to go anywhere in APW it would have just as much to do with her backstage wrangling as his in ring ability.
She had laid his clothes out for him on the bed; a pair of black slacks with a thin silver pinstripe, a black Misfits t-shirt and a black velvet tuxedo jacket. He wasn’t sure where the clothes had come from but they fit him like a glove and he had to admit that he looked good. He was beginning to wish he had something to put on his feet besides his old beat to hell Chuck Taylor All Stars when he looked down and saw a box on the floor. He ripped off the lid to discover a pair of rattle snake skin boots and his face lit up like a kid on Christmas morning.
Delores: I hope you like them.
Khaos: I love them baby. This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me, thank you.
A tear ran down his cheek.
Delores: Well I saw how you looked like a slob compared to all of the other wrestlers and decided you needed a little bit of a makeover. So I went shopping and found clothes that I thought you would look good in with out looking like a yuppie.
Khaos slide the boots onto his size fourteen feet and nearly had a glory fit at how comfortable they were. He stood and took his lady by the hand and they walked out of the hotel room. They skipped the lobby and went straight to the valet parking area where a young man in a fugly burgundy uniform fetched their car, a 2011 Toyota Prius. He had wanted a Cadillac or at least an SUV of some sort, but Delores told him that if they wanted to stay in the expensive hotel they had to drive the cheap rental car.
The drive to the stadium was perfect. Ziggy Stardust was playing and the northern California sunshine helped take the spring chill out of the air. The past month spent traveling up and down the coast of the Golden State had made him think of forsaking his beloved Detroit for a home on the west coast. In a couple years when he was main eventing Rasslemania he could buy Delores a big house on the hill overlooking the ocean with enough room for two point five kids. Tonight he had to focus on the other has beens and never will bes booked in the battle royal. He had to focus because a title shot was on the line and Gary had been drilling the golden rule into his head for the past seven months. You know the rule; he who has the gold makes all the rules.
Delores parked the silver Toyota in the staff parking lot and they walked into the hallowed halls of Memorial Stadium holding hands. “Glittering” Gary Kowolski meets them inside the door with smiles and hugs and leads them into a cramped but well lit office that will serve as their dressing room for the day.
“Glittering” Gary: It’s a hell of a lot nicer than that janitor’s closet you got dressed in back in Sacramento. You’re moving up in the world kid and tonight you move your self all the way up into the title picture.
Delores: Gary don’t you be inflating his ego. He has a big night tonight and we need him focused on the battle royal not some hypothetical title match.
“Glittering” Gary: Delores you ever been in bed with a champion?
Delores: No but I did get drunk and fool around with some of the girls on my team when we won the Midwest championship last year.
The jaw of the fiery trainer hits the floor and Delores gives him a smile as sweet as honey.
Delores: You boys go over whatever strategy needs going over while I go find out what the schedule for the day is going to be. I know the show starts at five but I’m going to try and get you an interview. I think you need to get your face out there a little bit more, besides beating the hell out of girls and guys in masks.
She walks out of the room leaving her giant of a boyfriend alone with the gnarled veteran that is responsible for getting him to APW.
“Glittering” Gary: You have a good girl there kid. Even if she says things that make this old sailor blush.
Khaos: Yeah she is a good girl. I mean come on how many girls do you know would wait six years for a guy to get out of prison.
“Glittering” Gary: Honestly kid I know a lot of girls that would wait six years for a guy to get out of prison, but most of them are bat shit crazy. Delores is different because she’s not some psycho bitch that gets off on the fact that you killed a guy. She really loves you kid.
Khaos: I really love her too. I just wish I never killed that guy because we’ve lost six years because of it. I spent six years wondering if I was going to die because I lost it and beat the life out of a man.
“Glittering” Gary: You didn’t beat the life out of a man, kid. You beat the life out of a no good pimp that struck that beautiful woman that just walked out here. Any man that lays his hands on a woman deserves to be beaten to death and ran through a wood chipper.
Khaos: How am I any better than that guy? Did you see what I did in the ring a couple of weeks ago? I did more than just slap a woman, Gary.
“Glittering” Gary: What you did was wrestle a match. You did you job and got a pretty decent pay day for it I might add. You didn’t book yourself against a woman and you sure as hell didn’t do it for fun. You are nothing like that pig you killed, and if you say that again I’m going to kick your ass. I might be old as dirt but I got one more ass kicking in me. So sit your ass down and let’s talk about this match before the brains of the operation comes back and steals you from me.
The nearly seven foot tall ex-con folds himself into a steel chair and looks his mentor in the eyes.
“Glittering” Gary: Ok kid a battle royal is unlike any match you have ever been in before. The rules are simple; you throw anybody and everybody over the top rope. The strategies are a whole lot different than any other match. You have to constantly watch your back because everyone is gunning for you, especially you because you’re a big guy. People love to team up and go after the big guys early on in the match, because they think it gives them a better chance of winning.
Khaos: So keep my head on a swivel and be prepared to fight off two or three people at a time.
“Glittering” Gary: Exactly kid. If I were you I would stay as close to the middle of the ring as possible and conserve energy. Battle royals are the marathon of wrestling and I’ve seen a lot of wrestlers start out like wild fire only to peter out half way through and get tossed out on their asses.
Khaos: Got it. Keep my head on a swivel, stay in the middle of the ring and conserve energy. Anything else I should know?
“Glittering” Gary: Well the only other thing I can think to tell you is if you get a chance get out on the floor. You won’t get eliminated if you don’t go over the top rope and you can’t go over the top rope if your ass is on the floor. The fans will boo ya and some of the boys in the back might call you a chicken shit, but screw ‘em if it gets you a title shot.
The door opens and Delores walks in to the room. “Glittering” Gary stands and gives her a kiss on the cheek.
“Glittering” Gary: You take good care of him, he’s a good man.
He walks out of the room.
Delores: Well get your game face on. A camera man will be here in a couple of minutes to shoot a quick promo. Do you know what you want to say?
Khaos: I have a couple of ideas. I figure I’ll just wing it like I did speeches in school, what’s the worst that can happen?
Delores: Well ok. Just remember that I love no matter how bad of a promo you cut.
Khaos: I love you too, and thanks a bunch for the support.
She laughs that reminds Khaos a little bit of Betty Rubble before a knock at the door brings him back to reality. She answers it and a guy wearing an APW Staff t-shirt and carrying a camera walks into the room.
Cameraman: Alright Khaos this is how this is going to work. I’ll say action and you start talking. If you mess up we can start over, but please don’t mess up too many times. We have 40 people to shoot today and the other handicam guy is back at the hotel hung over. You cool?
Khaos: Yeah I’m cool.
The cameraman hoists the camera up onto his shoulder.
Cameraman: Action!
Khaos: Tonight is the biggest night in professional wrestling. It’s not taking place in Atlanta and it sure as hell ain’t taking place in Florida. No the biggest night in professional wrestling is coming to you live from historic Memorial Stadium on the Campus of the University of California in beautiful Berkley. Tonight is Rasslemania VII and at least one Mega Star will become a legend in this business.
We have hardcore matches, we have ladder matches, we have cage matches, hell we have guys taping their firsts and rolling them in broken glass matches; and I’m in a match with a bunch of Misfits. Do you think it’s by accident that I am wearing the t-shirt of one of the greatest, nay the greatest hardcore punk band? Do you think it is a coincidence that it says Misfits under the skull on my t-shirt? Hell no! Nothing is by accident here because I wanted to show you bingo hall wannabes what a real misfit looks like. You see I was a misfit before being a misfit was cool.
I was the kid in high school dressed in all black with the Buddy Holly glasses. I was the kid listening to music that went out of style before he was even born while everyone else was listening to Nstync and the Backdoor Boys. I was the kid that was bullied and picked on mercilessly until I got to be bigger than everyone else. I lived in shitty trailer park foster homes because my mom was a crack whore and didn’t even know who my real father was, but chances are he was either dead or in prison.
I am what a misfit looks like, not some “blue blood” pretty boy. I am the true face of a misfit, not a degenerate gambler that looks old enough to be my grandfather. Look deep into my eyes and you will see that I have no fear for the misfits. I spent six years of my life locked up on death row. I am used to surviving amongst the misfits and tonight should be no different.
So that leaves only my fellow APW Mega Stars. A motley assortment of wrestlers if there was ever one assembled. We have masked freaks, beautiful women, ham and eggers, jabronis and ten times losers. So if my calculations are correct, and I am very good at math, this match is a bearded lady short of a Coney Island Freak Show. What is that you say? We don’t have Cujo the Dog Faced Boy? Sure we do, why you think Fire Dragon wears a mask. We even have a sword swallower in Alexandra Callaway, because let’s be brutally honest she had to swallow something to get this far in professional wrestling. So I think we have all the bases covered, except for a bearded lady. Well I guess Bobby Bodacious has a little starter beard so we have that too.
I guess what I’m getting at is tonight I will be inside of the ring with a bunch of Misfits and freak show geeks. We are taking professional wrestling back to its carnival roots, but this match isn’t going to be some county fair. No tonight you are going to be witnessing a carnival of carnage with me as the ring leader. Tonight the winner of the battle royal isn’t going to be the guy that throws the most people over the top rope. No tonight the winner is going to be the guy that is willing to do the most violence upon his fellow man. To win tonight someone is going to have to be willing to kill me and I don’t think they have the guts. That’s what sets me apart from the pack, I am willing to kill for what I want and I’ve been on death row to prove it.
So tonight before you step into that ring with me each and every one of you needs to ask yourselves one question. Do I have what it takes to turn a predator into prey? Do you have what it takes to best The Natural Born Killer? Well do you?
Cameraman: Cut! That’s pretty good.
Khaos: I know.
Delores: Baby that was amazing. I’ll be right back.
Delores runs out of the room and slams the door.
The scene fades to black.
