Post by Reaver on Mar 25, 2011 13:33:54 GMT -4
Knuckles: Hey there Harvey. How things going? It must be hard to be locked away considering you’re everybody’s prison bitch. Seeing as how you’re locked up at the moment, I wanted to take this time to give you, or I should say show you, something very special in your honor. Today; there won’t be any epilogues or pre-requisites. Instead I’m just going to spell it out for you plain as day because you still don’t get the concept. I didn’t choose you for an “easy” win. You were simply in the wrong place at the wrong time. Had it been anybody else, the outcome would still be the same with the exception of it being them instead of you. I didn’t go to all this trouble to have it easy Branden. I did it because I wanted to show the division how far I’m willing to go. I wanted the hardest road to the APW Xtreme Championship simply because it will be worth THAT much more. I like how you have such fire in your eyes and that’s a good thing. It means that you’ll give me the best fight you have to offer, that combined with the “toughen up” classes I’ve been giving you for months now shall pose for a very fun day at Rasslemania. I want the best Branden Harvey you can bring and that’s what I hope I get. I did all the work for you Branden, all you have to do is show up. You’re right though, I am a veteran of these types of matches and I have every advantage in the world going into them compared to you. I have the size, the strength, the experience, the tenacity and of course the looks advantage. Well maybe I’ll let you have the looks advantage considering I’ve been bludgeoned in the face more often than you and the brain cell count isn’t what it used to be. Not to mention that you really do have a “purdy mouff”….HA
What ARE you doing in prison anyways Harvey? Did you spill your milk and throw a fit somewhere in public? By the look of the last promo, somebody must have spiked it because you were slurring a lot and it was very sad. How did you get a camera crew inside the prison anyways? I thought they didn’t allow such things when they fully lock you down in solitary. Must have cost you a lot of cigarettes to get that kind of allowance. Hey; remember when you faced Bishop for a spot at War Games only to come up short? This will be nothing less than that. Nate was right about you when he said that you spread yourself too thin. Riot Teamz, IWC, APW……how do you expect to get anywhere if you can’t focus on the task at hand? I need you at 100% not this half assed bullshit you give to IWC. With all that being said, I hope my special surprise will snap you out of this funk you’re in and focus on me. I give to you……
The scene opens on one of the United States most violent and notably deranged detention camps ever created, Guantanamo Bay…..or so it seems.
Guantánamo Bay is a detainment facility of the United States located in Cuba. The facility was established in 2002 by the Bush Administration to hold detainees from the war in Afghanistan and later Iraq. It is operated by the Joint Task Force Guantánamo of the United States government in Guantánamo Bay Naval Base, which is on the shore of Guantánamo Bay. The detainment areas consist of three camps: Camp Delta (which includes Camp Echo), Camp Iguana, and Camp X-Ray, the last of which has been closed. Christian Gallos, Jason Kash, Nate Bishop, Malcolm Perry the third and Johnny Knuckles are all seen standing in front of the gate wondering why they’re there.
Bishop: Ok guys so why are we here? What does Knuckle’s match have to do with Gitmo?
Gallos: Well Nate. Remember when I said I had my hand in many soups?
Bishop: Yea?
Gallos: Knuckles came to me with yet ANOTHER odd request and after much deliberation with myself and MP3, we made a few phone calls and poof; here we are.
Kash: That really doesn’t make much sense.
Knuckles: Harvey is going around doing his shoots live via satellite from prison. I don’t know how he was allowed air time being “accused” of murdering his wife but he is. So I decided that since he likes prison so much, I’ll show him what a REAL prison was like.
Kash: …..and they just LET us come here to train?
Gallos: Actually they were more than willing. They have a history of torturing the inmates and figured as long as we are willing to go to such extremes that it was completely acceptable.
Bishop: How could that be legal?
MP3: Because these prisoners are considered saboteurs and unlawful combatants, and thus not entitled to POW protection under the Geneva Convention.
Kash: I have a feeling that this might just go a little too far……
A soldier from inside walks outside the gate and escorts Dangertainment to where they will be allowed to do “their thing”. Looking around they notice all of the barbwire covered fences and guards standing there with machine guns and attack dogs. It’s almost like being at Sarah Palin’s house. After a far hike through most of the compound, they finally reach the back camp known as “CAMP X-RAY” that is supposedly been shut down. They come across a few armed guards standing there with 4 prisoners with bags on their heads and Branden Harvey t-shirts; bound and forced to stand on their knees. The prisoner’s names are: Birkah, Dirkah, Lirkah, and Doc. (their real names were kept safe to protect the innocent. And what I mean by innocent, I mean anybody who doesn’t work for an organization who calls themselves “AL”).
Soldier 1: Everything is set up for you Mr. Gallos. I hope we were able to help Dangertainment train for the upcoming RASSLEMANIA.
Gallos: This will do just fine thank you. Just for reference, I’d like to say that Dangertainment completely supports the troops.
Just as he says that, the camera pans down and shows Bishop, Kash, and Knuckles grinning oddly at the camera with a thumbs up in a very typical comedic and corny fashion. It then pans back up at Gallos who continues to talk to the soldier then cuts back to the guys.
Kash: So what kind of training are we going to do today Knucklehead?
Knuckles: Today we will play a game called Ultimate Survivor. Here; instead of being eliminated, we will all be put through the toughest “activities” that I created in order to not just help me prepare for Harvey but to help you guys prepare for War Games.
Bishop: I don’t like where this is going…….
MP3: Afraid of getting tased?
Bishop: I’m more concerned with what John boy has locked in his noodle.
Knuckles: Stop thinking of my dick and worry about the games Bishop.
Bishop: *sigh*
They all walk to a giant fenced in area where there is a giant square drawn in chalk and a line down the middle. There are snipers standing at the top of four towers, one in each corner. The soldiers bring the prisoners in and unchains them on one side of the yard while Dangertainment stands on the other side. They whisper something to Gallos who then nods as the soldiers walks away.
Kash: What was that?
Gallos: He just told me the rules to this event. Turns out you will all be playing Ultimate Dodgeball where four members of team “AL” will face four members of team DT.
Bishop: but there are only three of us. Who is our fourth?
Gallos takes a few steps back and shoves MP3 into Kash who catches him then shoves him away. Gallos quickly runs behind the fence door and the soldiers lock it. They all stand around confused for a second until a bunch of bowling balls are rolled into the cage. Everybody just looks at each other for a brief moment until they all bum rush the balls and start HURLING them at each other. It’s total pandemonium as everybody is just throwing them. Suddenly the action stops so everybody can regroup and realize what they need to do. Three members of team “AL” have bowling balls and Bishop is the only member of team DT that has one. Dirkah and Doc throw their balls at Kash and MP3 but Kash easily moves to the side as MP3 drops down in fetal position screaming. Nate throws his ball and misses ad it hits the fence. Birkah throws his ball as Knuckles catches it and briefly gets the wind knocked out of him. Kash runs over and picks up a ball and throws it clipping Lirkah in the leg making him crash to the ground head first. Doc picks up another ball and chucks it. Bishop tries to catch it but changes his mind at the last minute and pulls his hand back in midair only to barely touch the ball.
Knuckles regains his composure and goes to throw the ball only to trip over MP3, who is crying at this point, and throws the ball like some girl and crashing into the pavement. All the soldiers watching are laughing and cheering. The guards in the towers decide to make things more interesting and start throwing M-80’s into the mix. Suddenly a burst of fireworks are going off while balls are still being thrown. One clips Birkah in the side of the head and another nails MP3 in the back as he tries to run from it. There’s a bunch of fireworks going off at the feet of Kash as he hops around trying not to catch fire. Dirkah and Doc are pushing each other trying not to get hit by a ball just thrown by Bishop. Finally the fireworks stop and nobody has any energy to continue so the game is brought to an end. Everybody is bloodied up and sore as the gate opens and Gallos as well as the soldiers cheer and clap.
Gallos: Amazing job guys. Moving onto the next game……
Both teams moan in pain as they are brought inside a building where a table is set up.
Gallos: Ok, the next game is a simple jerky eating contest.(HA I got it in)
Kash: Knux should be good at this one….HA
Knuckles: Fuck you Kash.
Gallos: Actually team “AL” is going to go first…..trust me.
Bishop: These guys probably haven’t eaten in days, they totally have an advantage here.
Gallos:……trust me.
Team DT look confused as team “AL” is escorted to the table and their eyes bulge out in happiness. They haven’t eaten in days so they are pretty hungry. They all look at each other as a soldier turns on a timer and yells, “GO!” I swear to god it’s the most disgusting thing you have ever seen. Grown men eating this dried up piece of meat, which for some reason seems very juicy and has this odd ammonia-like smell. The timer buzzer goes off as the soldiers force team “Al” to stop and count what they ate. The team total is 48 pieces in 5 minutes. (guess they were hungry)
Knuckles: Holy shit! How are we supposed to beat that?
Gallos: You’re not……
Bishop: Then how….
Gallos: Team DT forfeits this round!!
Kash: Gallos, what the fuck?
Gallos: Not only did the guards piss in it, but they also put in a bunch of laxatives.
Suddenly a giant rumble is heard coming from the table as team “AL” hunch over in pain then finally a giant PLOP is heard and continues to echo throughout the room. The soldiers laugh as team DT catches a whiff of the smell and try not to vomit. The all run out of the room as the soldiers continue to laugh as the camera goes to a brief black screen.
”Due to its’ graphic nature and content as well as the time constraints of this promo, it could not be seen. Viewer Discretion is advised. The network strongly apologizes for the interruption and brings you back to your regularly scheduled promo.”
Team DT is seen limping out of the compound covered in what appears to be “mud” as the soldiers all cheer and wave goodbye to our heroes. Nobody knows what’s going on back inside as the echoes of screams can be heard in the distance and looking in the background, you can see two football field goals standing erect with two prisoners tied up on the inside of the goal while buzz saw blades are being hurled at them. (c’mon, they totally had that coming.) Team DT celebrates yet another successful training session and win over team “AL”.
Gallos: Congratulations you guys. Rasslemania will definitely be a Dangertainment PPV. I’m also glad that you decided not to touch the white powdery stuff on the table Kash. I know you don’t do that kind of thing but it wasn’t what you thought it was.
Kash: Was it Anthrax?
Gallos: No, it was Manthrax…..(Manthrax, side effects include but are not limited to, Anal Leakage and completely turning a man into a woman.)
Bishop: I don’t know if this training helps physically but I’m totally prepared mentally.
Knuckles: Not to mention that Harvey won’t know what hit him.
Kash: You guys hear that?
F-18’s fly overhead as if they were going into battle.
Knuckles: Is that for us?
Bishop: I don’t know but they look like they’re carrying some heavy artillery.
MP3: Yea, those are their most powerful missiles; the Daisy Cutter.
Knuckles: No, it’s actually their K-10 Bitch-slapper.
No sooner does he say that, Knuckles slaps the piss out of MP3. Kash, Bishop and Gallos all laugh at him as he stands there holding his face and the scene fades.
Knuckles: Tisk tisk tisk Harvey. It looks as though your luck has run out and your recent exploits have taken a turn for the worse. I could care less about your personal life because I wouldn’t expect any sympathy from anybody else so why expect it from me? As far as I’m concerned, you are just a liability. You show me clips of past matches as if it means something. Did you not understand that our past accomplishments are obsolete? This is the here and now Harvey. Am I supposed to be impressed because you were impaled once or twice? I’ve been shot at, stabbed, IMPALED, sliced, gouged, thrown, fallen, crashed, run over, spiked, beaten, battered, eaten and set on fire more times than not. Congratulations Branden, you succeeded in proving nothing.
I’ve literally broken just about every bone in my body. I’ve got scars upon scars in places that would make your head spin. And you wanna’ have a pissing contest with me? Get real Harvey. This isn’t about who’s dick is bigger, but for the record I AM Italian, this is about pride. This is about how far you are willing to go for just about nothing. I have nothing to lose Harvey, do you? Considering that your wife is dead now, I would think you wouldn’t. You being in prison is completely and utterly a joke. I know damn well you didn’t kill anybody. You don’t have the heart nor do you have the balls to go those lengths. And you wanna’ be Xtreme Champion? I’m sure as shit willing to kill Harvey and damn well ready to die. That’s what separates you from me. You think you can bring me pain? You’re going to make me bleed?
I’M COUNTING ON IT BRADEN!!
You think this will be my last time bleeding in front of millions of fans? It’s nothing new and sure as hell nothing different. I dare you to try and cripple me Harvey. I dare you to hit me with everything you got. Just like everybody else who thought they had what it took to beat me this way, you will quickly learn that you don’t have what it takes to get the job done. You think you can handle more pain than me? This isn’t a game of “swords” in elementary school, this is reality. The same reality where I’m 120lbs bigger, heavier and stronger than you. What’s even funnier is that you might be faster and have a high fly mentality, I’ll just catch you in midair and pull off something innovative and breathe taking. The fact that you weigh that much less is going to be the key factor in making me look good when you crash and burn 15 feet from the top rope and into the piles of broken glass and thumb tacks. What will your mom think then huh? What will she do when she sees her little boy not moving and covered in blood on PPV? A heart attack will surely be the least of her worries then when a tall; dark man with a scythe come knocking on her door to take her away.
If I have to exalt all of my resources to make sure you are acquitted of all charges just to get you to be at Rasslemania then so help me god I will. I will not let my months of planning be ruined because some pigs don’t know how to do their damn jobs properly. You can say things like how I’m going to be your personal play thing all you like but flattery will get you nowhere. Maybe you been locked up for too long and see me standing here dressed as Katie Perry but realize that I’m not.
As far as the title is concerned, it’s just being kept warm for me. I could have easily jumped into a title shot but all for what? Some piece of tin and leather? Like I said before Harvey, I want to earn it the hard way so that when I DO become champ, its value sky rockets. You aren’t used to following the rules because you are still new to the game. You have more experience than Nate Bishop of Dangertainment for god sakes and STILL he beat you. What does that say Branden? It says that if you took you head out of your ass long enough to see the bigger picture, then you too could be higher up on the APW ladder. Now then, before I go I just wanna’ make note than you probably won’t see this until minutes before you step through that curtain because you ran out of cigarettes paying for air time so you didn’t have any left for television privileges. But just remember to clinch up and breath slowly as bubba, your cell mate, walks over to give you “THE SONIC BOOM”.
OCC: The idea for this came from obviously myself, jimmy and tmarv while talking in chat. its the same chat where tmarv got his idea for the real world rp he did (which kicked ass BTW) so i took it a step further. thanks for the inspiration guys, we did it!! (it is what is it? i dunno i heard it somewhere.....)
What ARE you doing in prison anyways Harvey? Did you spill your milk and throw a fit somewhere in public? By the look of the last promo, somebody must have spiked it because you were slurring a lot and it was very sad. How did you get a camera crew inside the prison anyways? I thought they didn’t allow such things when they fully lock you down in solitary. Must have cost you a lot of cigarettes to get that kind of allowance. Hey; remember when you faced Bishop for a spot at War Games only to come up short? This will be nothing less than that. Nate was right about you when he said that you spread yourself too thin. Riot Teamz, IWC, APW……how do you expect to get anywhere if you can’t focus on the task at hand? I need you at 100% not this half assed bullshit you give to IWC. With all that being said, I hope my special surprise will snap you out of this funk you’re in and focus on me. I give to you……
ULTIMATE SURVIVOR: Guantanamo Bay
….because ANYBODY can survive Africa.
The scene opens on one of the United States most violent and notably deranged detention camps ever created, Guantanamo Bay…..or so it seems.
Guantánamo Bay is a detainment facility of the United States located in Cuba. The facility was established in 2002 by the Bush Administration to hold detainees from the war in Afghanistan and later Iraq. It is operated by the Joint Task Force Guantánamo of the United States government in Guantánamo Bay Naval Base, which is on the shore of Guantánamo Bay. The detainment areas consist of three camps: Camp Delta (which includes Camp Echo), Camp Iguana, and Camp X-Ray, the last of which has been closed. Christian Gallos, Jason Kash, Nate Bishop, Malcolm Perry the third and Johnny Knuckles are all seen standing in front of the gate wondering why they’re there.
Bishop: Ok guys so why are we here? What does Knuckle’s match have to do with Gitmo?
Gallos: Well Nate. Remember when I said I had my hand in many soups?
Bishop: Yea?
Gallos: Knuckles came to me with yet ANOTHER odd request and after much deliberation with myself and MP3, we made a few phone calls and poof; here we are.
Kash: That really doesn’t make much sense.
Knuckles: Harvey is going around doing his shoots live via satellite from prison. I don’t know how he was allowed air time being “accused” of murdering his wife but he is. So I decided that since he likes prison so much, I’ll show him what a REAL prison was like.
Kash: …..and they just LET us come here to train?
Gallos: Actually they were more than willing. They have a history of torturing the inmates and figured as long as we are willing to go to such extremes that it was completely acceptable.
Bishop: How could that be legal?
MP3: Because these prisoners are considered saboteurs and unlawful combatants, and thus not entitled to POW protection under the Geneva Convention.
Kash: I have a feeling that this might just go a little too far……
A soldier from inside walks outside the gate and escorts Dangertainment to where they will be allowed to do “their thing”. Looking around they notice all of the barbwire covered fences and guards standing there with machine guns and attack dogs. It’s almost like being at Sarah Palin’s house. After a far hike through most of the compound, they finally reach the back camp known as “CAMP X-RAY” that is supposedly been shut down. They come across a few armed guards standing there with 4 prisoners with bags on their heads and Branden Harvey t-shirts; bound and forced to stand on their knees. The prisoner’s names are: Birkah, Dirkah, Lirkah, and Doc. (their real names were kept safe to protect the innocent. And what I mean by innocent, I mean anybody who doesn’t work for an organization who calls themselves “AL”).
Soldier 1: Everything is set up for you Mr. Gallos. I hope we were able to help Dangertainment train for the upcoming RASSLEMANIA.
Gallos: This will do just fine thank you. Just for reference, I’d like to say that Dangertainment completely supports the troops.
Just as he says that, the camera pans down and shows Bishop, Kash, and Knuckles grinning oddly at the camera with a thumbs up in a very typical comedic and corny fashion. It then pans back up at Gallos who continues to talk to the soldier then cuts back to the guys.
Kash: So what kind of training are we going to do today Knucklehead?
Knuckles: Today we will play a game called Ultimate Survivor. Here; instead of being eliminated, we will all be put through the toughest “activities” that I created in order to not just help me prepare for Harvey but to help you guys prepare for War Games.
Bishop: I don’t like where this is going…….
MP3: Afraid of getting tased?
Bishop: I’m more concerned with what John boy has locked in his noodle.
Knuckles: Stop thinking of my dick and worry about the games Bishop.
Bishop: *sigh*
They all walk to a giant fenced in area where there is a giant square drawn in chalk and a line down the middle. There are snipers standing at the top of four towers, one in each corner. The soldiers bring the prisoners in and unchains them on one side of the yard while Dangertainment stands on the other side. They whisper something to Gallos who then nods as the soldiers walks away.
Kash: What was that?
Gallos: He just told me the rules to this event. Turns out you will all be playing Ultimate Dodgeball where four members of team “AL” will face four members of team DT.
Bishop: but there are only three of us. Who is our fourth?
Gallos takes a few steps back and shoves MP3 into Kash who catches him then shoves him away. Gallos quickly runs behind the fence door and the soldiers lock it. They all stand around confused for a second until a bunch of bowling balls are rolled into the cage. Everybody just looks at each other for a brief moment until they all bum rush the balls and start HURLING them at each other. It’s total pandemonium as everybody is just throwing them. Suddenly the action stops so everybody can regroup and realize what they need to do. Three members of team “AL” have bowling balls and Bishop is the only member of team DT that has one. Dirkah and Doc throw their balls at Kash and MP3 but Kash easily moves to the side as MP3 drops down in fetal position screaming. Nate throws his ball and misses ad it hits the fence. Birkah throws his ball as Knuckles catches it and briefly gets the wind knocked out of him. Kash runs over and picks up a ball and throws it clipping Lirkah in the leg making him crash to the ground head first. Doc picks up another ball and chucks it. Bishop tries to catch it but changes his mind at the last minute and pulls his hand back in midair only to barely touch the ball.
Knuckles regains his composure and goes to throw the ball only to trip over MP3, who is crying at this point, and throws the ball like some girl and crashing into the pavement. All the soldiers watching are laughing and cheering. The guards in the towers decide to make things more interesting and start throwing M-80’s into the mix. Suddenly a burst of fireworks are going off while balls are still being thrown. One clips Birkah in the side of the head and another nails MP3 in the back as he tries to run from it. There’s a bunch of fireworks going off at the feet of Kash as he hops around trying not to catch fire. Dirkah and Doc are pushing each other trying not to get hit by a ball just thrown by Bishop. Finally the fireworks stop and nobody has any energy to continue so the game is brought to an end. Everybody is bloodied up and sore as the gate opens and Gallos as well as the soldiers cheer and clap.
Gallos: Amazing job guys. Moving onto the next game……
Both teams moan in pain as they are brought inside a building where a table is set up.
Gallos: Ok, the next game is a simple jerky eating contest.(HA I got it in)
Kash: Knux should be good at this one….HA
Knuckles: Fuck you Kash.
Gallos: Actually team “AL” is going to go first…..trust me.
Bishop: These guys probably haven’t eaten in days, they totally have an advantage here.
Gallos:……trust me.
Team DT look confused as team “AL” is escorted to the table and their eyes bulge out in happiness. They haven’t eaten in days so they are pretty hungry. They all look at each other as a soldier turns on a timer and yells, “GO!” I swear to god it’s the most disgusting thing you have ever seen. Grown men eating this dried up piece of meat, which for some reason seems very juicy and has this odd ammonia-like smell. The timer buzzer goes off as the soldiers force team “Al” to stop and count what they ate. The team total is 48 pieces in 5 minutes. (guess they were hungry)
Knuckles: Holy shit! How are we supposed to beat that?
Gallos: You’re not……
Bishop: Then how….
Gallos: Team DT forfeits this round!!
Kash: Gallos, what the fuck?
Gallos: Not only did the guards piss in it, but they also put in a bunch of laxatives.
Suddenly a giant rumble is heard coming from the table as team “AL” hunch over in pain then finally a giant PLOP is heard and continues to echo throughout the room. The soldiers laugh as team DT catches a whiff of the smell and try not to vomit. The all run out of the room as the soldiers continue to laugh as the camera goes to a brief black screen.
”Due to its’ graphic nature and content as well as the time constraints of this promo, it could not be seen. Viewer Discretion is advised. The network strongly apologizes for the interruption and brings you back to your regularly scheduled promo.”
Team DT is seen limping out of the compound covered in what appears to be “mud” as the soldiers all cheer and wave goodbye to our heroes. Nobody knows what’s going on back inside as the echoes of screams can be heard in the distance and looking in the background, you can see two football field goals standing erect with two prisoners tied up on the inside of the goal while buzz saw blades are being hurled at them. (c’mon, they totally had that coming.) Team DT celebrates yet another successful training session and win over team “AL”.
Gallos: Congratulations you guys. Rasslemania will definitely be a Dangertainment PPV. I’m also glad that you decided not to touch the white powdery stuff on the table Kash. I know you don’t do that kind of thing but it wasn’t what you thought it was.
Kash: Was it Anthrax?
Gallos: No, it was Manthrax…..(Manthrax, side effects include but are not limited to, Anal Leakage and completely turning a man into a woman.)
Bishop: I don’t know if this training helps physically but I’m totally prepared mentally.
Knuckles: Not to mention that Harvey won’t know what hit him.
Kash: You guys hear that?
F-18’s fly overhead as if they were going into battle.
Knuckles: Is that for us?
Bishop: I don’t know but they look like they’re carrying some heavy artillery.
MP3: Yea, those are their most powerful missiles; the Daisy Cutter.
Knuckles: No, it’s actually their K-10 Bitch-slapper.
No sooner does he say that, Knuckles slaps the piss out of MP3. Kash, Bishop and Gallos all laugh at him as he stands there holding his face and the scene fades.
Knuckles: Tisk tisk tisk Harvey. It looks as though your luck has run out and your recent exploits have taken a turn for the worse. I could care less about your personal life because I wouldn’t expect any sympathy from anybody else so why expect it from me? As far as I’m concerned, you are just a liability. You show me clips of past matches as if it means something. Did you not understand that our past accomplishments are obsolete? This is the here and now Harvey. Am I supposed to be impressed because you were impaled once or twice? I’ve been shot at, stabbed, IMPALED, sliced, gouged, thrown, fallen, crashed, run over, spiked, beaten, battered, eaten and set on fire more times than not. Congratulations Branden, you succeeded in proving nothing.
I’ve literally broken just about every bone in my body. I’ve got scars upon scars in places that would make your head spin. And you wanna’ have a pissing contest with me? Get real Harvey. This isn’t about who’s dick is bigger, but for the record I AM Italian, this is about pride. This is about how far you are willing to go for just about nothing. I have nothing to lose Harvey, do you? Considering that your wife is dead now, I would think you wouldn’t. You being in prison is completely and utterly a joke. I know damn well you didn’t kill anybody. You don’t have the heart nor do you have the balls to go those lengths. And you wanna’ be Xtreme Champion? I’m sure as shit willing to kill Harvey and damn well ready to die. That’s what separates you from me. You think you can bring me pain? You’re going to make me bleed?
I’M COUNTING ON IT BRADEN!!
You think this will be my last time bleeding in front of millions of fans? It’s nothing new and sure as hell nothing different. I dare you to try and cripple me Harvey. I dare you to hit me with everything you got. Just like everybody else who thought they had what it took to beat me this way, you will quickly learn that you don’t have what it takes to get the job done. You think you can handle more pain than me? This isn’t a game of “swords” in elementary school, this is reality. The same reality where I’m 120lbs bigger, heavier and stronger than you. What’s even funnier is that you might be faster and have a high fly mentality, I’ll just catch you in midair and pull off something innovative and breathe taking. The fact that you weigh that much less is going to be the key factor in making me look good when you crash and burn 15 feet from the top rope and into the piles of broken glass and thumb tacks. What will your mom think then huh? What will she do when she sees her little boy not moving and covered in blood on PPV? A heart attack will surely be the least of her worries then when a tall; dark man with a scythe come knocking on her door to take her away.
If I have to exalt all of my resources to make sure you are acquitted of all charges just to get you to be at Rasslemania then so help me god I will. I will not let my months of planning be ruined because some pigs don’t know how to do their damn jobs properly. You can say things like how I’m going to be your personal play thing all you like but flattery will get you nowhere. Maybe you been locked up for too long and see me standing here dressed as Katie Perry but realize that I’m not.
As far as the title is concerned, it’s just being kept warm for me. I could have easily jumped into a title shot but all for what? Some piece of tin and leather? Like I said before Harvey, I want to earn it the hard way so that when I DO become champ, its value sky rockets. You aren’t used to following the rules because you are still new to the game. You have more experience than Nate Bishop of Dangertainment for god sakes and STILL he beat you. What does that say Branden? It says that if you took you head out of your ass long enough to see the bigger picture, then you too could be higher up on the APW ladder. Now then, before I go I just wanna’ make note than you probably won’t see this until minutes before you step through that curtain because you ran out of cigarettes paying for air time so you didn’t have any left for television privileges. But just remember to clinch up and breath slowly as bubba, your cell mate, walks over to give you “THE SONIC BOOM”.
OCC: The idea for this came from obviously myself, jimmy and tmarv while talking in chat. its the same chat where tmarv got his idea for the real world rp he did (which kicked ass BTW) so i took it a step further. thanks for the inspiration guys, we did it!! (it is what is it? i dunno i heard it somewhere.....)