Post by JD Storm on May 18, 2011 0:29:28 GMT -4
Scene opens up in the front of the Skycity Darwin during the early morning hours. Not a lot of action seems to be taking place, presumably due to the early hour. Those that are coming and going appear to be tourists, for the most part. The palm trees on property are swaying in a gentle wind. The scene slowly switches to a conference room, where a small meet and greet session had just finished up. Several stands are closing up, employees boxing up the little bit of unsold merchandising that’s still left. At one booth, Gambler is getting hold of some old, stale coffee while looking over some sales figures. A few moments go by before he hands off the sales figures to an unknown representative.
Gambler
Good’ay mates. Just finishing making some money. Yeah, I know. Finally doing it legit. Managed to go a couple days without wagering something. Have to say that, without a doubt, doing an honest days work is for the birds. I’ll stick with my money squandering, womanizing, alcoholic tendencies. Why not? I’m in the Land Down Under. I should be enjoying some Fosters, listen to some Men At Work, perhaps even watch Crocodile Dundee back in my hotel room. Still need to find someone to tie me Kangaroo, down.
Don’t see why I shouldn’t enjoy myself, while I’m down here. First time during my career that I’ve actually been in Australia. Toured Japan and U.K., before. Never made it here. I should enjoy the sites. See what kind of interesting things are going on. Bet on a few rugby games. Maybe get some of the action on a couple lacrosse games. I should do so, while I’m still on a hot streak.
In my last couple of matches, I’ve beaten two of APW’s finest wrestlers. First, I beat Chris Cyrus in an impromptu match. Then, during our last Asylum, I defeated Nate Bishop by submission. Now, at Mayhem, here in Darwin, I get to do the same thing to five other competitors. Five opponents, one match, Tap Out rules for the vacant Tap Out Championship. Five other competitors, and I don’t know if one of them has one any of their recent matches.
Madok, you recently lost the Tap Out Championship to a person who’s no longer on the roster. How you managed to weasel your way into this match is truly beyond me. Only thing that really matters is that I have to go through you to gain the Gold. Last several times we faced, you narrowly escaped with the Gold. Took every ounce of energy, and a miracle, to leave as the champion. With me and four other people coming after you, you’re odds aren’t looking too good. Only thing that will save you is being the final entrant in the gauntlet. Even then, that’ll only give you a brief advantage. Minimal advantage, at best.
It’ll be a lot like facing Gracie again. You’ll come into the gauntlet, expecting to win the Tap Out Championship. And, once again, you’ll manage to leave the match completely disappointed. Probably tap out to our resident doper in record time.
Jason Kash. I heard all about you from a good buddy of mine, a man you were lucky to beat. You remember Bodacious, I’m sure. He warned me all about all of your bad little habits, all the dirty little tricks you like to win a match. Good news for you, man. You’ll need every trick in the book to try and eliminate me from the match. Heard all about your girlfriend……what was her name again? Mary Jane? Might want to lay off the smoke for a few days, man. Eyes are getting a bit bloodshot. Won’t be lasting too long in the match, if you’re spending all of your time at Taco Bell with a case of the munchies.
Who knows. Maybe after you lose at Mayhem, you can pursue your other career goals. I think it involved being a master of the custodial arts……janitor if anyone wants to be a dick about it. If you get your foot in the right door, you can work for one of those research firms. On the right day, they might study the benefits of medical marijuana.
Then we’ve got Tyler Vaughn. Only person in this gauntlet, besides myself, to actually rank on APW’s Most Wanted List. Ranked quite a bit lower then me, I must add. Managed to lose what…..two in a row? Three? Not a good streak to have, is it tough guy? Doesn’t feel good being a loser, does it? I’ll gladly wager my bottom dollar that you still leave Mayhem the same way you enter……no gold, loser’s share of the purse, and nobody so much as giving a crap about who you are. And, you’ll have added another loss to your growing losing streak. Keep your chin up, sport.
Now, what’s this that I here we’ve got Derek Wellings in the match? Seriously, who the hell is he? I had to do an extensive internet search on him to figure out who he is. Sadly, I was mistaken about a few things. Thought he was a slob who dressed in an old, ratty Brooklyn Dodgers shirt. Thought he used to be a wrestling clown, at one point. I even made the mistake of believing that he painted a red stripe in his hair and naming himself after a Rooster.
Once I got my information straight, I found out that I wasn’t completely wrong about this guy. After enough research, I managed to find a small blurb on Derek on Wikipedia. Apparently, the only thing eventful he did with his life was being a drill sergeant, prior to being a wrestler. Then, when he did join the pro ranks, most of that time was spent on his back. Odd, that’s usually what happens when you’re a slut….or a whore. Think you would’ve had a pretty good career as a street walker, with as much time as you’ve spent on your back. Even when you worked for a so-called friend, you were only kept around for so long. What the hell. Even your friends knew that you’d make a good patsy when things go horribly wrong. Yeah…you’ll do about as well as Kristie Alley on a Jenny Craig diet.
Should’ve stayed in the military. You could’ve collected a bigger pension from them if you had stuck around another 5 or 10 years. Just seeing your face or hearing your name gives me the urge to give lovin’ to fat chicks while trying to be some 70’s guy.
Wait…..I almost forgot somebody. Who was my final opponent again? Coke Classic? Colt 45? That’s it….Cult Classic. Ms. Rachel Cole. The up and coming star from the independent scene. You look more like an alter ego for Miley Cyrus then an actual wrestler. You belong at Disneyland with Goofy. APW is where real men compete. You don’t want to upset your Justin Bieber fan club by looking hideous when you have your exciting little meeting in……um….uh….do kids like yourself still have clubhouses? Or do you know meet on this Instant Messenger thing?
Either way, go off doing whatever young girls like yourself should be doing. Braid someone’s hair. Look pretty. Play dress-up with mommies clothes. Just don’t waste the time in an APW ring. The rest of us, mainly myself, want to win an actual title belt. It means a lot of money to us. You’re just wasting our time.
Honestly, I have a lot of better things to do, right now, then continue talking trash about of jabronies who are lucky to have an APW contract. I have twenty minutes to get some bets placed. I’ve got the over-under on a few AFL games coming up. I know I can beat the spread on some of those games, as well. Honestly, I’m going to leave Darwin a much wealthier man.
Scene fades to black.
Gambler
Good’ay mates. Just finishing making some money. Yeah, I know. Finally doing it legit. Managed to go a couple days without wagering something. Have to say that, without a doubt, doing an honest days work is for the birds. I’ll stick with my money squandering, womanizing, alcoholic tendencies. Why not? I’m in the Land Down Under. I should be enjoying some Fosters, listen to some Men At Work, perhaps even watch Crocodile Dundee back in my hotel room. Still need to find someone to tie me Kangaroo, down.
Don’t see why I shouldn’t enjoy myself, while I’m down here. First time during my career that I’ve actually been in Australia. Toured Japan and U.K., before. Never made it here. I should enjoy the sites. See what kind of interesting things are going on. Bet on a few rugby games. Maybe get some of the action on a couple lacrosse games. I should do so, while I’m still on a hot streak.
In my last couple of matches, I’ve beaten two of APW’s finest wrestlers. First, I beat Chris Cyrus in an impromptu match. Then, during our last Asylum, I defeated Nate Bishop by submission. Now, at Mayhem, here in Darwin, I get to do the same thing to five other competitors. Five opponents, one match, Tap Out rules for the vacant Tap Out Championship. Five other competitors, and I don’t know if one of them has one any of their recent matches.
Madok, you recently lost the Tap Out Championship to a person who’s no longer on the roster. How you managed to weasel your way into this match is truly beyond me. Only thing that really matters is that I have to go through you to gain the Gold. Last several times we faced, you narrowly escaped with the Gold. Took every ounce of energy, and a miracle, to leave as the champion. With me and four other people coming after you, you’re odds aren’t looking too good. Only thing that will save you is being the final entrant in the gauntlet. Even then, that’ll only give you a brief advantage. Minimal advantage, at best.
It’ll be a lot like facing Gracie again. You’ll come into the gauntlet, expecting to win the Tap Out Championship. And, once again, you’ll manage to leave the match completely disappointed. Probably tap out to our resident doper in record time.
Jason Kash. I heard all about you from a good buddy of mine, a man you were lucky to beat. You remember Bodacious, I’m sure. He warned me all about all of your bad little habits, all the dirty little tricks you like to win a match. Good news for you, man. You’ll need every trick in the book to try and eliminate me from the match. Heard all about your girlfriend……what was her name again? Mary Jane? Might want to lay off the smoke for a few days, man. Eyes are getting a bit bloodshot. Won’t be lasting too long in the match, if you’re spending all of your time at Taco Bell with a case of the munchies.
Who knows. Maybe after you lose at Mayhem, you can pursue your other career goals. I think it involved being a master of the custodial arts……janitor if anyone wants to be a dick about it. If you get your foot in the right door, you can work for one of those research firms. On the right day, they might study the benefits of medical marijuana.
Then we’ve got Tyler Vaughn. Only person in this gauntlet, besides myself, to actually rank on APW’s Most Wanted List. Ranked quite a bit lower then me, I must add. Managed to lose what…..two in a row? Three? Not a good streak to have, is it tough guy? Doesn’t feel good being a loser, does it? I’ll gladly wager my bottom dollar that you still leave Mayhem the same way you enter……no gold, loser’s share of the purse, and nobody so much as giving a crap about who you are. And, you’ll have added another loss to your growing losing streak. Keep your chin up, sport.
Now, what’s this that I here we’ve got Derek Wellings in the match? Seriously, who the hell is he? I had to do an extensive internet search on him to figure out who he is. Sadly, I was mistaken about a few things. Thought he was a slob who dressed in an old, ratty Brooklyn Dodgers shirt. Thought he used to be a wrestling clown, at one point. I even made the mistake of believing that he painted a red stripe in his hair and naming himself after a Rooster.
Once I got my information straight, I found out that I wasn’t completely wrong about this guy. After enough research, I managed to find a small blurb on Derek on Wikipedia. Apparently, the only thing eventful he did with his life was being a drill sergeant, prior to being a wrestler. Then, when he did join the pro ranks, most of that time was spent on his back. Odd, that’s usually what happens when you’re a slut….or a whore. Think you would’ve had a pretty good career as a street walker, with as much time as you’ve spent on your back. Even when you worked for a so-called friend, you were only kept around for so long. What the hell. Even your friends knew that you’d make a good patsy when things go horribly wrong. Yeah…you’ll do about as well as Kristie Alley on a Jenny Craig diet.
Should’ve stayed in the military. You could’ve collected a bigger pension from them if you had stuck around another 5 or 10 years. Just seeing your face or hearing your name gives me the urge to give lovin’ to fat chicks while trying to be some 70’s guy.
Wait…..I almost forgot somebody. Who was my final opponent again? Coke Classic? Colt 45? That’s it….Cult Classic. Ms. Rachel Cole. The up and coming star from the independent scene. You look more like an alter ego for Miley Cyrus then an actual wrestler. You belong at Disneyland with Goofy. APW is where real men compete. You don’t want to upset your Justin Bieber fan club by looking hideous when you have your exciting little meeting in……um….uh….do kids like yourself still have clubhouses? Or do you know meet on this Instant Messenger thing?
Either way, go off doing whatever young girls like yourself should be doing. Braid someone’s hair. Look pretty. Play dress-up with mommies clothes. Just don’t waste the time in an APW ring. The rest of us, mainly myself, want to win an actual title belt. It means a lot of money to us. You’re just wasting our time.
Honestly, I have a lot of better things to do, right now, then continue talking trash about of jabronies who are lucky to have an APW contract. I have twenty minutes to get some bets placed. I’ve got the over-under on a few AFL games coming up. I know I can beat the spread on some of those games, as well. Honestly, I’m going to leave Darwin a much wealthier man.
Scene fades to black.
