Post by SalTal on Jul 1, 2011 12:44:57 GMT -4
I am not a failure.
I am not a failure.
I AM NOT A FAILURE!
I am a former champion! I've won Test for the Best! I've headlined more pay per views than these boys have won at! This is an outrage! How dare anyone say this about me. I'm ... I'm ... I'm Sally Talfourd. I'm in Test for the Best again. And I'm going to remind everyone just what makes me one of the all time greats. Everyone will remember why I was the greatest wrestler that APW had at a time. Ok, I might not be recognized as the best right now - but what is recognition but a piece of leather that has sparkly bits on it? - but I know I'm still the best that APW has. Inside the ring and out. I wrestler better than anyone here. I move better than anyone here. I even think better than everyone here. I'm simply better than each and every hack that I have to front up against just to get my pay for the week.
I'm even better looking than all of these fuglies!
Test for the Best is an opportunity for some to make a name. For others, it's a chance to get their fifteen minutes of fame. For me? This is a joke. It's laughable. It's the biggest waste of time I've had to indulge since I was robbed of my title by Lester Only. How on Earth does Mr. President think this is a just way of rewarding his former champion!? Oh! I know: This would be the same Mr. President who has thrown in his lot with CJ Gates - who tag teamed with him just to boost his confidence (as if CJ's ego needed some more stroking - stop it, CJ, or you'll go blind!). This is all a conspiracy to throw the darling if APW into the main event. It's just a great work to make sure that the cash cow (and regular cow) that is CJ Gates (or is it Gate$?) up against Lester just to milk it for all it's worth.
Looking at CJ's *ahem* physique of late, he's got more of a chance of giving Jeff milk than I do!
But let's not forget about the poor patsies who are being used like the fifty-five cent whores that they are (I say fifty-five cents because that's about what you should all be getting for you pay-check at the end of the pay per view). Those poor saps from OverDrive and those wrestling cadets from Asylum? They're just the grass that this cow chews on. I'm not giving those idiots a second of my important time. They can make their on case on their on time with their own money (I guess it will be a late night, scraping together that money, hey guys and girl?). Me? I'm only going to talk about the only person that matters in the tournament. The only person who has actually been in this and done something with it. The only person who has, you know, achieved anything in APW ... like becoming the APW World Heavyweight Champion (but before it became a joke title). The only person who counts in all this.
I'm only going to talk about Sally Talfourd.
Me ...
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Welcome to Action Packed Wrestling![/color]
Videos - *click* - Megastars - *click* - Sally Talfourd - *click* - Videos - *click*[/i]
Welcome to Happy Ending T.V.!
Recent - *click* - Episode #45: Test for the Rest - *click*
Recorded the 1st of July, 2011.
Starring: Sally Talfourd, Shane the cameraman,
*click* - Loading ...
"Sally Talfourd presents ..."
is written across the screen, fades out, then
"In association with Action Packed Wrestling"
is next to appear, holds, then fades out for
"Happy Endings T.V."
which eventually fades out to
"A few nights ago, in a Sally Talfourd dream ...
which fades away to a shot of Sally Talfourd, sitting inside of a room. She's perched on the end of a bed, hands folded and in her lap. She has on some very strange pyjamas. Pink, you remember those one-pieces? Like babies wear that cover over their feet and hands? Yeah, that. She has two pigtails sprouting from the side of her head. She looks around the room which is bathed in darkness.
[Sally] What the Hell?
[Mysterious Voice Over] Sally Talfourd! *Sally jumps with fright* Sally, what are you doing?
[Sally] Ummm … sitting here? *Sally looks down at what she's sitting on* On a bed? In the most hideous looking pyjamas I've ever seen? Who would even buy these …
[Mysterious Voice Over] No. What are you doing with yourself? You're acting like a child these days. Attacking people, bitching about anything that moves, even turning your back on people who need your help. What happened to this woman?
behind Sally, a TV screen flickers on. She turns enough to be able to see it. There's a wrestling match going on …
Sally turns back to stare straight ahead from her place. Then she starts to gaze around, trying to sort out where she is. Soon she'll wake up and realise it's all a dream. But not yet.
[Mysterious Voice Over] What happened to that woman, Sally?
[Sally] Seriously? *She looks around herself* I'm right here you idiot! I'm Sally Talfourd! And you still haven't told me where I am!?
[Mysterious Voice Over] Are you for real … ugh, I mean, what has happened to the woman that used to fight fair? Who didn't cheat to win? Who could celebrate with the fans?
[Sally] Ohhh? Her? I hear she's flipping tricks for twenty-bucks a pop on the corner of 5th and Broadway. *Sally tries to run her hands through her hair, but can't because of the pony tails. She looks up, trying to see then, but can't* That woman's long gone, and good riddance to her.
[Mysterious Voice Over] Why? Everyone loved her.
[Sally] And? Why do I care about that? Why should I care about what anyone else thinks about me? They aren't me. They want to be me. They want to watch me. But they can never be me. They aren't in my place. They aren't in my matches. They aren't putting themselves on the line every time I'm in a match! What the Hell would they know then!? If they were in my place, they'd realise that what I do now? That's what I need to do! *Sally, speaking more to herself this time* It's what I have to do to get ahead.
[Mysterious Voice Over] Maybe it's not about getting ahead … but doing what's right?
Sally looks up to the … roof? Whatever. She has an enraged look across her face. She pushes herself off from the bed, stomps a few steps, then starts to yell, randomly, into the air.
[Sally] Doing what's right? Right!? What even is right? And what good does it do you!? I did that for months here, and you know what it got me? A kick in the ass and not even a thank-you card from the people that benefited from me. The people who made money off me. The people who watched me. The people who were entertained by me. It was deplorable, you arrogant … whatever you are! I did the right thing for so long and now? Now I've got nothing to show for it except a line on the resume. And what good is that? Everyone used me. Everyone took a bit of me for their own personal use until there was nothing left. Now? Now there really is nothing left of that woman. Lester Only too my title. President Jeff too my will. And CJ Gates too my soul. You want to get angry at someone? Get angry at them! Get angry at all those men that used me just to get a push or a rub or an extra fifteen minutes. Maybe they wanted to get a feel of me because they couldn't even pay a woman to get that close to them. But whatever. They all got something out of me … and I got nothing. So excuse me if I'm a little selfish.
Sally finishes up with an overly sarcastic tone. So sarcastic that even someone with hearing impediments could tell. She rolls her eyes, and looks around again from her vantage point, then eventually gives up with a prolonged sigh.
[Mysterious Voice Over] When are we going to see the old Sally Talfourd?
[Sally] Next week?
[Mysterious Voice Over] Really!?
[Sally] … ugh, you're as stupid as my cameraman. Of course I'm not changing any time soon. I don't see a reason to change.
[Mysterious Voice Over] But …
[Sally] No reason.
[Mysterious Voice Over] Test for …
[Sally] NO REASON! There is no reason at all to play by the books. You play by the books and you're a chump. Look at CJ – he's a chump. And Rebel. And Khaos ...
[Mysterious Voice Over] I don't think they all play by the books, Sally.
[Sally] I don't really know. But more importantly: I don't really care. Three out of those three names are useless to APW. They bring nothing at all. They just suck the cash out of it … cash that should rightly go to me. No one turns up to see their elite skills. No one turns up to see their magic. No one turns up to see them do anything except get hurt. That's all anyone wants to see … and that's all they get when it comes to a match with me.
[Mysterious Voice Over] And what about you? Why do people come to see you?
[Sally] Because I'm beautiful. I'm beauty in the ring and out of it. People come to see me because I am the person that is doing the violence, not receiving it. I'm the one who dishes out everything that they want to see. These sycophants want to see blood and guts and gore. It doesn't matter who is hurting, so long as someone is. They want to see me because they know I'm just that much freaking better than the losers here. Because I'm better, they know that the person up against me is going to hurt. A lot. It doesn't matter who they are – they are going to be the ones in pain. That's why people want to see me. Because I'm the best, and the rest are … well, the rest are the rest. They are poor, lost, little puppies. They don't know what they're doing. They don't know how to do it. And they don't even know why. They just do all sorts of random stuff and hope it works. Sometimes it works. Sometimes, like CJ, you can string enough stuff together to win a match. Others, like Khaos and Rebel, they can't even amount to anything more that curtain jerkers.
[Mysterious Voice Over] Well …
[Sally] This is a dream, isn't it?
[Mysterious Voice Over] Yes.
[Sally] So all I have to do is wake up from all this, and it's gone?
[Mysterious Voice Over] That's right … but how do you do that?
[Sally] I saw a show once. If you nearly die in a dream, you wake up.
[Mysterious Voice Over] Then do it.
[Sally] Ok … the TV, can I play a video?
[Mysterious Voice Over] It's your dream, it can play whatever you want.
[Sally] Hmmm, ok.
Sally starts to think really hard, scrunching up her face in deep concentration. Then, suddenly, the TV flickers back to life. The image fades in and it's a CJ Gates match. It doesn't matter who it's against, they are all the same. Unless it's against Sally Talfourd, and then CJ looks half-decent. But Sally doesn't stop there. Another TV comes alive, fades in and it's a Khaos match. Again, not really important who the idiot is who agreed to face him. Then another TV! And, you guessed it, a Rebel match comes on. Sally stands, turns, and watches one TV. Then looks to the next. And then to the last. Then bam! She falls into a pile on the floor. A terminal case of being bored to death.
[Mysterious Voice Over] Oh dear ...
The scene blasts to white, and then we find Sally Talfourd sitting on the apron of the APW ring. It's all set up and ready to go, ready for show night. She dangles her feet over the side, kicking them in the air. She looks around, then back to the camera once more, with a smile.
[Sally] Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Test for the Best. The premier tournament for APW talent to compete for a chance at the biggest title this company has. *Sally stops herself* Well, it would be if there were enough talent in the company. So this year, you've got one amazing megastar and seven other nobodies. Me, the woman that people love to see, but hate to say it, will be blazing her way through the tournament like she did last year. You all loved me then … screw what you think now. This year it's me. My chance to do it for myself. Not for you stinking fans who haven't had to fight for anything other than through your latest heart attack. No, this time I'm doing it all for me. And isn't it just apt that the first round match for me is up against CJ bleeding Gates. This is the most important match of the night, not some BS second, third, final round match. One of us is going to win it simply because the rest of the fruitcakes in this tournament are as useless as a stick floating in water. So it's down to you and me, CJ. And maybe, just maybe, this will be the end of it all. This has been going on for months, CJ. And I guess you've earned some sort of credit for being able to hang on this long. I mean, well done for not running like a coward. Many have, when left to face me. But no, you've stuck around. And yeah, you get some credit. But you also get a free head-check. Because only an idiot of the highest order would, you know, keep coming after me. I mean, you won the pay per view match – wasn't that enough for you?
It's come down to this CJ. You and me. But it's not like it's some, you know, throw away match. Now I know that a match between you and me right now is big enough. It's months in the making. There's blood been spilled over it. There's been so much hatred and anger and animosity brewing between us that our last match up was going to be big. Really big. But then … we got a twist. It got made a whole lot bigger. I whole lot more important. A feature event. The first round of the Test For the Best tournament, and it's you and me. The biggest match of the night. It's bigger than the title match. It's even bigger than the finals that only one of us can make it to. CJ, I wonder if you've really wrapped your head around that. Me? This is just another walk in the park. I do this in my sleep. This is what I was born to do. There's just something about me … something that just makes me the best that you or any one of the losers that hang around with you. And sure, I might have lost a match here or there *Sally waves her hand through the air, as if to brush away those losses that really do mean nothing!* but that doesn't matter. When it comes to matches like this, CJ, I step up. I make it count. I am the person that wins.
Sally stands up on the apron, turning to look in the ring. She runs her hands over the top rope before climbing in. She does a small lap of things, then crouches in the centre. Shane climbs up, hanging over the top rope to capture Sally.
It's not just a test of skill any more. It's a test of focus. It's a test of which one of us can handle the pressure. This is title match stuff. And no, not some tag team title match. This match is going to get the kind of attention that a world title match would get. That many people will be watching. That many people will be caring. That many people will be waiting … waiting … waiting for one of us to screw up. And that person who does? They will fail. They won't win. They will fail. You can't handle it, CJ. You can't handle that stuff. You wish you could. You try to. You get near to sometimes. But you fail … each and every time. When it comes to taking that step, you are too afraid. You're a coward. You're yellow, CJ. Everyone is just waiting for you to show 'it'. The 'it' that separates you from the rest of the losers who surround you. But time and time again, you let everyone down. You go so well in Survive and Conquer, then you go out and do nothing at all with this extra push. You beat me at Mayhem … then you're stupid enough to get beat down by me and a trained ape. I mean, if you had 'it' would you still be someone tangled up with me? I'd be afraid of you, wouldn't I? I'd have to be a grade-A moron to go after someone better than me, right? Yet I keep coming back for you. Again and again and again. I'm like an addict, CJ. And All I need is to whomp your ass for half and hour to get my kicks.
[Mysterious Voice Over] See, this is what I'm talking about, Sally.
[Sally] What the …?
[Mysterious Voice Over] You're still asleep, Sally. But that tirade of abuse? That's why people hate you Sally.
[Sally] Really!? I had no idea! Please, tell me something else I need to know. *Silence* That's better. No, shut up and let me do my thing. The unrelenting attack you have launched on me, my character, and my body – proves everything I've been saying. People don't watch APW so they can cheer you because you're good and boo me because I'm bad. They watch to see people get hurt! They want to see anyone get hurt, CJ! It doesn't matter who, just so long as someone bleed. So long as someone cries. So long as someone is physically assaulted to the point that they can't even stand up! These are the people you represent, CJ. Each and every time I attacked you? They watched. And each and every time you struck me? They watched. And they cheered. They cheered when you hit me. They cheered when you fought back. But they didn't cheer because you were making the miraculous come-back. No no no, they cheered because the violence was going to continue! Instead of laying down and ending all of this … you continued it. After the pay per view, you kept at it. You could have walked away … but you didn't.
Surely you knew what would happen in that ring? Or are you so stupid to think that I didn't want to hurt you? I used to be the darling of the fans, CJ! They loved me because I gave them their fix. I gave them their violence. And I didn't change. I didn't change at all. They changed. But they knew, deep down, that I would give them violence. I would give them unrestrained violence. And they loved it. So what did you expect when I called you down to the ring? A handshake, a pat on the butt, and we'd be friends again? Oh sure, you can pretend that you didn't trust me … but if you didn't trust me, you should have known not to come to the ring! You're a grade-A idiot, CJ! You knew exactly what would happen in that ring after Mayhem. The only reason you would regret it now is because you lost out. You thought you could trot down and if a fight did start up, you'd win. A pay per view win will fill you with that kind of arrogance, CJ. But you knew exactly what you were doing: You were giving the fans their fix of violence. You were giving them the fight they wanted. They didn't want a wrestling match. They didn't want respect. They didn't want friends, CJ! They wanted VIOLENCE!
So I ask you this, CJ: How different are we, really? What is the difference between us? When it comes to what we do, where is the difference? You can fight for the fans. You can fight for honour. You can fight for everything that's good. But, at the end of the day, you're no better than me. You can't claim any moral high-ground on me. Because you give the fans exactly what I give them. The only difference is the quality. I give them the violence, I give them the match, I give them the fix they need and want. You? You fall short. You never give them enough.
This match of ours, it isn't so much about you versus me. It's more. So much more. It's what you stand for against what I stand for. It's about what you believe against what I believe. What you fight for against what I fight for. Ignore that you're just a patsy of fans – a tool for them to get their enjoyment off. Let's pretend for a minute that, you know, you actually are in control of everything you do and think and say. Let's pretend that this fantasy land exists where you are king of yourself. I know what you think you fight for. I know what you stand for. And I know what you believe in. You believe that what you do is right. What you do is just. What you do is proper. I know all this because … because I used to be the same. I used to think that there were things worth fighting for in this company. That they needed someone “good” *Sally quotes her fingers* to be the flag-bearer that would bring the masses in. But I realised something. It didn't matter how successful I was, it didn't matter if I won or lost, and it didn't even matter who I was against – people flocked to the stadium. People bought the tickets quicker than they were released. People were excited just for APW to be in town. It didn't matter that I was the biggest name the company had, nor did it matter who I was up against. Hell, it didn't even matter if I was in a match. Those psychotic fans only wanted to see violence! They didn't want to art of wrestling. They wanted to see two people come as close as you can to killing someone on live TV.
I know you think you're fighting for something different. You haven't woken up to that yet – that the fans don't give a rat's ass about you and what you believe in. Why would they? You give them everything they want without asking a single thing in return. You're not selfish … and for some reason you think that's a good thing. I'm sure you think giving out … and putting out … is the way to get ahead in this business. Give, give, give. I've seen you do it for months now. You haven't thought about yourself for even three minutes. *Sally cracks a coy smile, almost as if she had seen a child of 3 trying to read 'War and Peace'* It's kinda cute, CJ. It really is. But cute only lasts for so long until it gets freaking annoying! Selfish? I don't know why you and your band of merry men think it's so bad. You don't become an APW champion without it. You don't become a recognised name without it. You don't win tournaments without it. What have you done? Where have you “skills” *Sally quotes again with her fingers* got you? A tag team championship and a slap on the back? That's pathetic, CJ. That's disgraceful. So disgraceful that you hardly deserve a match with me at all! The only reason you're here is because you got good enough for one night. One night, you managed to pull out enough to match me. Credit where it's due – you did that. You became only the second person to pin me, singles, in this company.
But that doesn't make you like that other man. And it sure as Hell doesn't make you like me. Luck, fluke, and rub of the green – three ways to describe your supposed win. I doubt that the match was even called down the middle. Because someone like me – someone so much better – doesn't lose to someone like you. It just … doesn't … happen. I am so much better than you. Better than the losers in this company. Better than anyone you can put me against! I have worked my ass off to get here, and I'm not about to let some twerp like you take over my place. Or those dropkicks from Asylum. There's no one here that deserves to push me out of the spotlight. Everyone likes to ignore it, but I am so far beyond you, CJ, or you Khaos, or you Jonny Rebel. None of you are even close to me. I am better at everything I can do in the ring than you could ever dream of. If either of you, Khaos or Rebel, were half as good as me, it wouldn't take a yearly tournament of random matches to get in the ring with me. You'd have had that main event match that you so desperately want against me. But no. No, you two can only dream of being at my level. Of getting my treatment. Of sharing the ring with me. And while you dreams might come true if you can make it past tripping over your own feet to meet me in the second round, it will soon turn into a nightmare. One with pain and anguish and regret. Regret for having ever wanted to wrestle me. To measure against me. To prove yourself against me. Because the only thing you're going to prove is that the quality of OverDrive has severely fallen since I was the champion.
And are you surprised? When I was in charge there was at least something to work towards. Something to aspire to be for all to plebs … you minions … you nobodies. Now what? What do you have to look up to? Lester Only? A man who spent the past however many years bagging each and every one of you, bagging APW, bagging me? Yeah, a real quality man. The sort of guy you should look up to. That's why APW has gone to Hell. The head if rotten, so of course the body has to be. So this tournament needs to crown the strongest, most able woman the number one contender to him. Why? Because there's only one person in all of this that has beat Lester Only before. You think you could do it, CJ? Rebel? Khaos? You all have no chance. If any of you won this tournament, it would be a disgrace! A disgrace to the tournament, to the past winner, to me! I am the reigning Test for the Best champion. I'm the person who made history one year ago. I am the person who proved that she is the person to measure themselves against in APW. If you ever wanted to get a shot at the belt, you had to be better than me. No small feat. And while you've all probably been able to dazzle and amaze for a few minutes on a handful of nights … none of you do it like I do. None of you can put on as great a match as I do on even my worst night. You're all next to useless. The only use you all do have is that I need someone to wrestle. I need someone to, you know, take apart. I need someone stupid enough to get into the ring with me willingly. And they'd have to be stupid, because there's no way they can realistically walk in and think they're going to win. No way at all. I bet if you even asked CJ he'd tell you that he didn't think he'd win that pay per view. And if he says otherwise, he's lying.
There's a pause, and then
"Sally Talfourd"
is handwritten across the screen, in purple. Before it fades out and the episode comes to a close.
I am not a failure.
I AM NOT A FAILURE!
I am a former champion! I've won Test for the Best! I've headlined more pay per views than these boys have won at! This is an outrage! How dare anyone say this about me. I'm ... I'm ... I'm Sally Talfourd. I'm in Test for the Best again. And I'm going to remind everyone just what makes me one of the all time greats. Everyone will remember why I was the greatest wrestler that APW had at a time. Ok, I might not be recognized as the best right now - but what is recognition but a piece of leather that has sparkly bits on it? - but I know I'm still the best that APW has. Inside the ring and out. I wrestler better than anyone here. I move better than anyone here. I even think better than everyone here. I'm simply better than each and every hack that I have to front up against just to get my pay for the week.
I'm even better looking than all of these fuglies!
Test for the Best is an opportunity for some to make a name. For others, it's a chance to get their fifteen minutes of fame. For me? This is a joke. It's laughable. It's the biggest waste of time I've had to indulge since I was robbed of my title by Lester Only. How on Earth does Mr. President think this is a just way of rewarding his former champion!? Oh! I know: This would be the same Mr. President who has thrown in his lot with CJ Gates - who tag teamed with him just to boost his confidence (as if CJ's ego needed some more stroking - stop it, CJ, or you'll go blind!). This is all a conspiracy to throw the darling if APW into the main event. It's just a great work to make sure that the cash cow (and regular cow) that is CJ Gates (or is it Gate$?) up against Lester just to milk it for all it's worth.
Looking at CJ's *ahem* physique of late, he's got more of a chance of giving Jeff milk than I do!
But let's not forget about the poor patsies who are being used like the fifty-five cent whores that they are (I say fifty-five cents because that's about what you should all be getting for you pay-check at the end of the pay per view). Those poor saps from OverDrive and those wrestling cadets from Asylum? They're just the grass that this cow chews on. I'm not giving those idiots a second of my important time. They can make their on case on their on time with their own money (I guess it will be a late night, scraping together that money, hey guys and girl?). Me? I'm only going to talk about the only person that matters in the tournament. The only person who has actually been in this and done something with it. The only person who has, you know, achieved anything in APW ... like becoming the APW World Heavyweight Champion (but before it became a joke title). The only person who counts in all this.
I'm only going to talk about Sally Talfourd.
Me ...
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Internet Explorer - *click* - Favorites - *click* - APW.com ...
Welcome to Action Packed Wrestling![/color]
Videos - *click* - Megastars - *click* - Sally Talfourd - *click* - Videos - *click*[/i]
Welcome to Happy Ending T.V.!
Recent - *click* - Episode #45: Test for the Rest - *click*
Recorded the 1st of July, 2011.
Starring: Sally Talfourd, Shane the cameraman,
*click* - Loading ...
"Sally Talfourd presents ..."
is written across the screen, fades out, then
"In association with Action Packed Wrestling"
is next to appear, holds, then fades out for
"Happy Endings T.V."
which eventually fades out to
"A few nights ago, in a Sally Talfourd dream ...
which fades away to a shot of Sally Talfourd, sitting inside of a room. She's perched on the end of a bed, hands folded and in her lap. She has on some very strange pyjamas. Pink, you remember those one-pieces? Like babies wear that cover over their feet and hands? Yeah, that. She has two pigtails sprouting from the side of her head. She looks around the room which is bathed in darkness.
[Sally] What the Hell?
[Mysterious Voice Over] Sally Talfourd! *Sally jumps with fright* Sally, what are you doing?
[Sally] Ummm … sitting here? *Sally looks down at what she's sitting on* On a bed? In the most hideous looking pyjamas I've ever seen? Who would even buy these …
[Mysterious Voice Over] No. What are you doing with yourself? You're acting like a child these days. Attacking people, bitching about anything that moves, even turning your back on people who need your help. What happened to this woman?
behind Sally, a TV screen flickers on. She turns enough to be able to see it. There's a wrestling match going on …
Cassidy (Criss Cassidy – remember him? No? Me neither ...) does indeed stay focused, lifting Sally up into a Crucifix position once more! However, his arm gives out on him, and he's forced to drop Sally down to her feet. She turns him around, jumping up to lock in the headscissors, and grabbing the arm to apply another COTS in the center of the ring! Cassidy struggles mightily to get out, but eventually has no choice but to tap out! DING! DING! DING!
Your 2010 Test for the Best Winner: Sally Talfourd
Ferrari: Here is your winner, by submission, and the 2010 Test for the Best winner, Sally Talfourd!
The crowd goes wild as “Starstrukk” begins to play and Sally gets her arm raised by the ref! Cassidy holds his arm in pain as he rolls out of the ring and makes his way to the back. Tears are forming in Sally's eyes as she realizes what she's just accomplished!
Harvey: Ladies and gentlemen, history has just been made here tonight! Sally Talfourd is the first woman to win the Test for the Best tournament! She defeated three men here tonight, and truly earned the title of The Best! Sally Talfourd has earned herself a shot at the APW Heavyweight Championship thanks to her efforts in winning the grueling tournament! She beat two long time APW veterans and a very game newcomer to earn the victory tonight! I think we could even go on to say that this was the best Test for the Best tournament in the history of APW!
The music continues to play as Sally exits the ring and celebrates with the fans in the front row as we go to a commerical for Shockwave!
Your 2010 Test for the Best Winner: Sally Talfourd
Ferrari: Here is your winner, by submission, and the 2010 Test for the Best winner, Sally Talfourd!
The crowd goes wild as “Starstrukk” begins to play and Sally gets her arm raised by the ref! Cassidy holds his arm in pain as he rolls out of the ring and makes his way to the back. Tears are forming in Sally's eyes as she realizes what she's just accomplished!
Harvey: Ladies and gentlemen, history has just been made here tonight! Sally Talfourd is the first woman to win the Test for the Best tournament! She defeated three men here tonight, and truly earned the title of The Best! Sally Talfourd has earned herself a shot at the APW Heavyweight Championship thanks to her efforts in winning the grueling tournament! She beat two long time APW veterans and a very game newcomer to earn the victory tonight! I think we could even go on to say that this was the best Test for the Best tournament in the history of APW!
The music continues to play as Sally exits the ring and celebrates with the fans in the front row as we go to a commerical for Shockwave!
Sally turns back to stare straight ahead from her place. Then she starts to gaze around, trying to sort out where she is. Soon she'll wake up and realise it's all a dream. But not yet.
[Mysterious Voice Over] What happened to that woman, Sally?
[Sally] Seriously? *She looks around herself* I'm right here you idiot! I'm Sally Talfourd! And you still haven't told me where I am!?
[Mysterious Voice Over] Are you for real … ugh, I mean, what has happened to the woman that used to fight fair? Who didn't cheat to win? Who could celebrate with the fans?
[Sally] Ohhh? Her? I hear she's flipping tricks for twenty-bucks a pop on the corner of 5th and Broadway. *Sally tries to run her hands through her hair, but can't because of the pony tails. She looks up, trying to see then, but can't* That woman's long gone, and good riddance to her.
[Mysterious Voice Over] Why? Everyone loved her.
[Sally] And? Why do I care about that? Why should I care about what anyone else thinks about me? They aren't me. They want to be me. They want to watch me. But they can never be me. They aren't in my place. They aren't in my matches. They aren't putting themselves on the line every time I'm in a match! What the Hell would they know then!? If they were in my place, they'd realise that what I do now? That's what I need to do! *Sally, speaking more to herself this time* It's what I have to do to get ahead.
[Mysterious Voice Over] Maybe it's not about getting ahead … but doing what's right?
Sally looks up to the … roof? Whatever. She has an enraged look across her face. She pushes herself off from the bed, stomps a few steps, then starts to yell, randomly, into the air.
[Sally] Doing what's right? Right!? What even is right? And what good does it do you!? I did that for months here, and you know what it got me? A kick in the ass and not even a thank-you card from the people that benefited from me. The people who made money off me. The people who watched me. The people who were entertained by me. It was deplorable, you arrogant … whatever you are! I did the right thing for so long and now? Now I've got nothing to show for it except a line on the resume. And what good is that? Everyone used me. Everyone took a bit of me for their own personal use until there was nothing left. Now? Now there really is nothing left of that woman. Lester Only too my title. President Jeff too my will. And CJ Gates too my soul. You want to get angry at someone? Get angry at them! Get angry at all those men that used me just to get a push or a rub or an extra fifteen minutes. Maybe they wanted to get a feel of me because they couldn't even pay a woman to get that close to them. But whatever. They all got something out of me … and I got nothing. So excuse me if I'm a little selfish.
Sally finishes up with an overly sarcastic tone. So sarcastic that even someone with hearing impediments could tell. She rolls her eyes, and looks around again from her vantage point, then eventually gives up with a prolonged sigh.
[Mysterious Voice Over] When are we going to see the old Sally Talfourd?
[Sally] Next week?
[Mysterious Voice Over] Really!?
[Sally] … ugh, you're as stupid as my cameraman. Of course I'm not changing any time soon. I don't see a reason to change.
[Mysterious Voice Over] But …
[Sally] No reason.
[Mysterious Voice Over] Test for …
[Sally] NO REASON! There is no reason at all to play by the books. You play by the books and you're a chump. Look at CJ – he's a chump. And Rebel. And Khaos ...
[Mysterious Voice Over] I don't think they all play by the books, Sally.
[Sally] I don't really know. But more importantly: I don't really care. Three out of those three names are useless to APW. They bring nothing at all. They just suck the cash out of it … cash that should rightly go to me. No one turns up to see their elite skills. No one turns up to see their magic. No one turns up to see them do anything except get hurt. That's all anyone wants to see … and that's all they get when it comes to a match with me.
[Mysterious Voice Over] And what about you? Why do people come to see you?
[Sally] Because I'm beautiful. I'm beauty in the ring and out of it. People come to see me because I am the person that is doing the violence, not receiving it. I'm the one who dishes out everything that they want to see. These sycophants want to see blood and guts and gore. It doesn't matter who is hurting, so long as someone is. They want to see me because they know I'm just that much freaking better than the losers here. Because I'm better, they know that the person up against me is going to hurt. A lot. It doesn't matter who they are – they are going to be the ones in pain. That's why people want to see me. Because I'm the best, and the rest are … well, the rest are the rest. They are poor, lost, little puppies. They don't know what they're doing. They don't know how to do it. And they don't even know why. They just do all sorts of random stuff and hope it works. Sometimes it works. Sometimes, like CJ, you can string enough stuff together to win a match. Others, like Khaos and Rebel, they can't even amount to anything more that curtain jerkers.
[Mysterious Voice Over] Well …
[Sally] This is a dream, isn't it?
[Mysterious Voice Over] Yes.
[Sally] So all I have to do is wake up from all this, and it's gone?
[Mysterious Voice Over] That's right … but how do you do that?
[Sally] I saw a show once. If you nearly die in a dream, you wake up.
[Mysterious Voice Over] Then do it.
[Sally] Ok … the TV, can I play a video?
[Mysterious Voice Over] It's your dream, it can play whatever you want.
[Sally] Hmmm, ok.
Sally starts to think really hard, scrunching up her face in deep concentration. Then, suddenly, the TV flickers back to life. The image fades in and it's a CJ Gates match. It doesn't matter who it's against, they are all the same. Unless it's against Sally Talfourd, and then CJ looks half-decent. But Sally doesn't stop there. Another TV comes alive, fades in and it's a Khaos match. Again, not really important who the idiot is who agreed to face him. Then another TV! And, you guessed it, a Rebel match comes on. Sally stands, turns, and watches one TV. Then looks to the next. And then to the last. Then bam! She falls into a pile on the floor. A terminal case of being bored to death.
[Mysterious Voice Over] Oh dear ...
The scene blasts to white, and then we find Sally Talfourd sitting on the apron of the APW ring. It's all set up and ready to go, ready for show night. She dangles her feet over the side, kicking them in the air. She looks around, then back to the camera once more, with a smile.
[Sally] Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Test for the Best. The premier tournament for APW talent to compete for a chance at the biggest title this company has. *Sally stops herself* Well, it would be if there were enough talent in the company. So this year, you've got one amazing megastar and seven other nobodies. Me, the woman that people love to see, but hate to say it, will be blazing her way through the tournament like she did last year. You all loved me then … screw what you think now. This year it's me. My chance to do it for myself. Not for you stinking fans who haven't had to fight for anything other than through your latest heart attack. No, this time I'm doing it all for me. And isn't it just apt that the first round match for me is up against CJ bleeding Gates. This is the most important match of the night, not some BS second, third, final round match. One of us is going to win it simply because the rest of the fruitcakes in this tournament are as useless as a stick floating in water. So it's down to you and me, CJ. And maybe, just maybe, this will be the end of it all. This has been going on for months, CJ. And I guess you've earned some sort of credit for being able to hang on this long. I mean, well done for not running like a coward. Many have, when left to face me. But no, you've stuck around. And yeah, you get some credit. But you also get a free head-check. Because only an idiot of the highest order would, you know, keep coming after me. I mean, you won the pay per view match – wasn't that enough for you?
It's come down to this CJ. You and me. But it's not like it's some, you know, throw away match. Now I know that a match between you and me right now is big enough. It's months in the making. There's blood been spilled over it. There's been so much hatred and anger and animosity brewing between us that our last match up was going to be big. Really big. But then … we got a twist. It got made a whole lot bigger. I whole lot more important. A feature event. The first round of the Test For the Best tournament, and it's you and me. The biggest match of the night. It's bigger than the title match. It's even bigger than the finals that only one of us can make it to. CJ, I wonder if you've really wrapped your head around that. Me? This is just another walk in the park. I do this in my sleep. This is what I was born to do. There's just something about me … something that just makes me the best that you or any one of the losers that hang around with you. And sure, I might have lost a match here or there *Sally waves her hand through the air, as if to brush away those losses that really do mean nothing!* but that doesn't matter. When it comes to matches like this, CJ, I step up. I make it count. I am the person that wins.
Sally stands up on the apron, turning to look in the ring. She runs her hands over the top rope before climbing in. She does a small lap of things, then crouches in the centre. Shane climbs up, hanging over the top rope to capture Sally.
It's not just a test of skill any more. It's a test of focus. It's a test of which one of us can handle the pressure. This is title match stuff. And no, not some tag team title match. This match is going to get the kind of attention that a world title match would get. That many people will be watching. That many people will be caring. That many people will be waiting … waiting … waiting for one of us to screw up. And that person who does? They will fail. They won't win. They will fail. You can't handle it, CJ. You can't handle that stuff. You wish you could. You try to. You get near to sometimes. But you fail … each and every time. When it comes to taking that step, you are too afraid. You're a coward. You're yellow, CJ. Everyone is just waiting for you to show 'it'. The 'it' that separates you from the rest of the losers who surround you. But time and time again, you let everyone down. You go so well in Survive and Conquer, then you go out and do nothing at all with this extra push. You beat me at Mayhem … then you're stupid enough to get beat down by me and a trained ape. I mean, if you had 'it' would you still be someone tangled up with me? I'd be afraid of you, wouldn't I? I'd have to be a grade-A moron to go after someone better than me, right? Yet I keep coming back for you. Again and again and again. I'm like an addict, CJ. And All I need is to whomp your ass for half and hour to get my kicks.
[Mysterious Voice Over] See, this is what I'm talking about, Sally.
[Sally] What the …?
[Mysterious Voice Over] You're still asleep, Sally. But that tirade of abuse? That's why people hate you Sally.
[Sally] Really!? I had no idea! Please, tell me something else I need to know. *Silence* That's better. No, shut up and let me do my thing. The unrelenting attack you have launched on me, my character, and my body – proves everything I've been saying. People don't watch APW so they can cheer you because you're good and boo me because I'm bad. They watch to see people get hurt! They want to see anyone get hurt, CJ! It doesn't matter who, just so long as someone bleed. So long as someone cries. So long as someone is physically assaulted to the point that they can't even stand up! These are the people you represent, CJ. Each and every time I attacked you? They watched. And each and every time you struck me? They watched. And they cheered. They cheered when you hit me. They cheered when you fought back. But they didn't cheer because you were making the miraculous come-back. No no no, they cheered because the violence was going to continue! Instead of laying down and ending all of this … you continued it. After the pay per view, you kept at it. You could have walked away … but you didn't.
Surely you knew what would happen in that ring? Or are you so stupid to think that I didn't want to hurt you? I used to be the darling of the fans, CJ! They loved me because I gave them their fix. I gave them their violence. And I didn't change. I didn't change at all. They changed. But they knew, deep down, that I would give them violence. I would give them unrestrained violence. And they loved it. So what did you expect when I called you down to the ring? A handshake, a pat on the butt, and we'd be friends again? Oh sure, you can pretend that you didn't trust me … but if you didn't trust me, you should have known not to come to the ring! You're a grade-A idiot, CJ! You knew exactly what would happen in that ring after Mayhem. The only reason you would regret it now is because you lost out. You thought you could trot down and if a fight did start up, you'd win. A pay per view win will fill you with that kind of arrogance, CJ. But you knew exactly what you were doing: You were giving the fans their fix of violence. You were giving them the fight they wanted. They didn't want a wrestling match. They didn't want respect. They didn't want friends, CJ! They wanted VIOLENCE!
So I ask you this, CJ: How different are we, really? What is the difference between us? When it comes to what we do, where is the difference? You can fight for the fans. You can fight for honour. You can fight for everything that's good. But, at the end of the day, you're no better than me. You can't claim any moral high-ground on me. Because you give the fans exactly what I give them. The only difference is the quality. I give them the violence, I give them the match, I give them the fix they need and want. You? You fall short. You never give them enough.
This match of ours, it isn't so much about you versus me. It's more. So much more. It's what you stand for against what I stand for. It's about what you believe against what I believe. What you fight for against what I fight for. Ignore that you're just a patsy of fans – a tool for them to get their enjoyment off. Let's pretend for a minute that, you know, you actually are in control of everything you do and think and say. Let's pretend that this fantasy land exists where you are king of yourself. I know what you think you fight for. I know what you stand for. And I know what you believe in. You believe that what you do is right. What you do is just. What you do is proper. I know all this because … because I used to be the same. I used to think that there were things worth fighting for in this company. That they needed someone “good” *Sally quotes her fingers* to be the flag-bearer that would bring the masses in. But I realised something. It didn't matter how successful I was, it didn't matter if I won or lost, and it didn't even matter who I was against – people flocked to the stadium. People bought the tickets quicker than they were released. People were excited just for APW to be in town. It didn't matter that I was the biggest name the company had, nor did it matter who I was up against. Hell, it didn't even matter if I was in a match. Those psychotic fans only wanted to see violence! They didn't want to art of wrestling. They wanted to see two people come as close as you can to killing someone on live TV.
I know you think you're fighting for something different. You haven't woken up to that yet – that the fans don't give a rat's ass about you and what you believe in. Why would they? You give them everything they want without asking a single thing in return. You're not selfish … and for some reason you think that's a good thing. I'm sure you think giving out … and putting out … is the way to get ahead in this business. Give, give, give. I've seen you do it for months now. You haven't thought about yourself for even three minutes. *Sally cracks a coy smile, almost as if she had seen a child of 3 trying to read 'War and Peace'* It's kinda cute, CJ. It really is. But cute only lasts for so long until it gets freaking annoying! Selfish? I don't know why you and your band of merry men think it's so bad. You don't become an APW champion without it. You don't become a recognised name without it. You don't win tournaments without it. What have you done? Where have you “skills” *Sally quotes again with her fingers* got you? A tag team championship and a slap on the back? That's pathetic, CJ. That's disgraceful. So disgraceful that you hardly deserve a match with me at all! The only reason you're here is because you got good enough for one night. One night, you managed to pull out enough to match me. Credit where it's due – you did that. You became only the second person to pin me, singles, in this company.
But that doesn't make you like that other man. And it sure as Hell doesn't make you like me. Luck, fluke, and rub of the green – three ways to describe your supposed win. I doubt that the match was even called down the middle. Because someone like me – someone so much better – doesn't lose to someone like you. It just … doesn't … happen. I am so much better than you. Better than the losers in this company. Better than anyone you can put me against! I have worked my ass off to get here, and I'm not about to let some twerp like you take over my place. Or those dropkicks from Asylum. There's no one here that deserves to push me out of the spotlight. Everyone likes to ignore it, but I am so far beyond you, CJ, or you Khaos, or you Jonny Rebel. None of you are even close to me. I am better at everything I can do in the ring than you could ever dream of. If either of you, Khaos or Rebel, were half as good as me, it wouldn't take a yearly tournament of random matches to get in the ring with me. You'd have had that main event match that you so desperately want against me. But no. No, you two can only dream of being at my level. Of getting my treatment. Of sharing the ring with me. And while you dreams might come true if you can make it past tripping over your own feet to meet me in the second round, it will soon turn into a nightmare. One with pain and anguish and regret. Regret for having ever wanted to wrestle me. To measure against me. To prove yourself against me. Because the only thing you're going to prove is that the quality of OverDrive has severely fallen since I was the champion.
And are you surprised? When I was in charge there was at least something to work towards. Something to aspire to be for all to plebs … you minions … you nobodies. Now what? What do you have to look up to? Lester Only? A man who spent the past however many years bagging each and every one of you, bagging APW, bagging me? Yeah, a real quality man. The sort of guy you should look up to. That's why APW has gone to Hell. The head if rotten, so of course the body has to be. So this tournament needs to crown the strongest, most able woman the number one contender to him. Why? Because there's only one person in all of this that has beat Lester Only before. You think you could do it, CJ? Rebel? Khaos? You all have no chance. If any of you won this tournament, it would be a disgrace! A disgrace to the tournament, to the past winner, to me! I am the reigning Test for the Best champion. I'm the person who made history one year ago. I am the person who proved that she is the person to measure themselves against in APW. If you ever wanted to get a shot at the belt, you had to be better than me. No small feat. And while you've all probably been able to dazzle and amaze for a few minutes on a handful of nights … none of you do it like I do. None of you can put on as great a match as I do on even my worst night. You're all next to useless. The only use you all do have is that I need someone to wrestle. I need someone to, you know, take apart. I need someone stupid enough to get into the ring with me willingly. And they'd have to be stupid, because there's no way they can realistically walk in and think they're going to win. No way at all. I bet if you even asked CJ he'd tell you that he didn't think he'd win that pay per view. And if he says otherwise, he's lying.
There's a pause, and then
"Sally Talfourd"
is handwritten across the screen, in purple. Before it fades out and the episode comes to a close.
