Post by brandenharvey on Aug 20, 2011 23:55:55 GMT -4
The scene opens at Jay's Gigantic Gym and Bar in Sacramento, CA. Lisa and Branden Harvey walk through the entrance of the gym. Lisa looks annoyed. Is she not always annoyed, angry, or bitter? Most wives are.
Lisa: I still do not see why you have to begin your training so early. It's 6:00 am. Are you stupid? Or just obsessive?
Branden: Because, Lisa, I am in the main event. This is important to me, Lisa. I need to be prepared. I need to be at the top of my game. I need to prove that I am better than BDC and Rico Casteel. I have to show everyone that I am not the loser they think I am.
Lisa: No, you do not. You are just going to cheat to win anyway. That does not prove anything. Except the fact that you are a self righteous bastard.
Branden: So? That's a part of the game. Can you name one wrestler that was ever on top that did not cheat to get there? Just one?
Lisa: I have never been a wrestling fan, Branden. I can not name one wrestler that was ever on top. I have always had a life. Then I married you.
Branden: What about since I've been wrestling? Look at Level One. He was most sucessful when he was cheating. When he stopped cheating, he was gone from the company within a few months. What does that tell you?
Lisa: What about Sally Talfourd? There is your one. She lost the title AFTER she started cheating. She was more successful when she was playing it straight. She was someone to look up to. I wonder why she has not had any Happy Endings lately?
Branden: There are anomalies in any equation. That does not mean the constant is inaccurate. As for Sally's show, it is lame anyway and I am glad not to have to watch it anymore. I have more important things to do. Like train for this World Heavyweight Championship match.
Lisa: Whatever you say. I just miss you playing by the rules. I do not like the looks I get from the ladies at the salon.
Branden: Bite your tongue, woman. I only did that to pander to those inbred idiots. But I pander no more. Those ladies are just jealous that they are not married to someone as great and mighty as me.
Lisa: If you say so. I am not going to be able to convince you anyway. I never am. Anyway, I am off to go shopping. Let me know when you need to be picked up.
Branden: I shall let you know. But it will not be for a few hours. I love you.
Lisa: I love you too. I will see you later.
They kiss. Lisa walks away. And now, Branden can finally let it be shown on his face how scared he is. You see, Branden is terrified of Rico Casteel and BDC.
Branden: Let us hope I am not killed at Shockwave. I will probably be put in a hospital bed at best.
Harvey signs in and begins his workout. The scene fades.
The scene opens in the home of Branden Harvey. He is sitting on the couch. He is sweating buckets. The closer we get to Shockwave, the more terrified he is. He begins to show his eloquence of speech with a promo.
Harvey: Hello, APW Universe.
He pauses, confused, annoyed, and a little taken aback.
Harvey: APW Universe? Where did I get that from? I must have heard it on TV somewhere. It sounded really lame. Anyway, let us start again.
The camera bursts to static before opening up, once again, in the home of Branden Harvey. Harvey is sitting on the couch. He begins to show his eloquence of speech with a promo.
Harvey: Hello, APW fans. I am here with the first episode in a two-part mini-series called "The Branden Harvey Main Event Anomaly." This is the show that will speak out against the conspiracy in APW. I am your host, Branden Harvey. And, as you all know, I am in the Asylum main event for APW Shockwave.
My opponents for this great championship match are the legendary Big Daddy Chris and the well-known Rico Casteel. Big Daddy Chris was a legend in EWC. Of course, he has not done anything of note in APW. Unless you count the beatdown I served him on Asylum. Rico is well-known because he... well... he really hasn't faced any tough competition yet.
Branden Harvey gets up. He walks around the room. He takes a few breaths before sitting back down. He is sweating profusely.
Harvey: Big Daddy Chris, your mind was not in it on Asylum. I do not know if you were fantasizing about that hot indian woman in the crowd or what. But you seemed to have no idea we were going to attack you until it was too late. You need to stop fantasizing about sex and focus on your competition here in APW.
Big Daddy Chris, you want to blame me for the attack. Well... go ahead. It was planned and executed by me. So, yeah, I did it through and through. Why, you ask? Because I wanted to be noticed. I am tired of being the punchline of every joke here in APW. Do you know how long it has been since I have so much as gotten a title shot in APW? I haven't been in a title match since I lost the APW Xtreme Championship back in December. I haven't had a title match at all in 2011. I did not even get a rematch for the title I lost.
Isn't that sad? I steal the show at Rasslemania. Knuckles and I have the best feud of 2011. I was even voted Rising Star of the Year back in 2010. You would think they'd give the Rising Star a title shot. But no. They did not. It did not take me long to realize there was a conspiracy against me. And I did what I had to do to overcome that conspiracy.
Beating you to a bloody pulp was just a perk.
Big Daddy Chris, you have promised to take out my Elite Posse before the match so they will not be able to interfere. Good plan. But you forgot one very important thing. I do not need the Elite Posse to back me up. Does it make things easier? Yes. Do I like it when things are easier? Yes. Can I beat you without help from my buddies? The answer is still yes. I can beat you with or without the Posse in my corner. I'll just have to work harder.
During our last match, the record book will show that you beat me. But I remember something else entirely. I recall kicking out of your pin attempt while the incompetent referee counted the three anyway. Without lucky breaks, miracles of faith, or divine intervention, you can't beat me, Bid Daddy Chris. That is a proven fact. Because you are just Big Daddy Chris while I am the great and powerful Branden Harvey. You do not stand a chance.
Now, as for you, Rico Casteel, you and I used to be friends. Or were we? I seem to recall you constantly berating me. I seem to remember you being caught on camera telling CJ Gates how much of a liability I was to the group. I seem to remember seeking your friendship and getting nothing but cold bitterness. That is, unless you wanted something. If you wanted something, you were all for talking to me.
Rico Casteel, you are one of those people that will pretend you are somebody's friend when you want something but turn your back on them when they need something. You are a user. That is pathetic.
You are pathetic.
That is why Blade and I are no longer friends with you, Mr. Casteel. We saw through you and Mr. Gates. We finally released ourselves from the grip you held on us. We undid the brainwashing that you two pathetic individuals put us through. We threw off the bonds of conspiracy and started recognizing that you were always against us.
You were just another part of the conspiracy. I mean, didn't you cause me to lose a match for the IWC... oh, sorry... APW Suicidal Championship back in November? I hit the Sonic Boom, as my inbred idiot pandering ass was calling it back then, and you just wouldn't stay down. You got up like the pathetic little girl you are and went for the cover. That is the kind of thing that proves that you are nothing more than an uncompromising opportunist.
Rico Casteel, I have never said these words to anyone before but I hate you with everything that I am. I have more hate for you than you would ever be able to comprehend. I hate you more than I hate Big Daddy Chris. I hate you more than I love my wife. Hell, I hate you more than I love my son. Why? Because you pretended to be my friend until you saw the opportunity to take advantage of our friendship, to take advantage of me, and you took that advantage to become APW Suicidal Champion.
You make me sick.
Rico Casteel, you think you can beat someone as profoundly intelligent as me? You are kidding yourself. I am the most supremely intelligent man to ever live on the face of this earth. That is how I got myself put in this match in the first place. I am a sick, sadistic human being. What are you? You are just a loose cannon.
Rico Casteel, you will attack me. You will berate me. You will even go for the pin. But your pathetic pin attempts will not faze me. They will not faze me because I have a plan. I have a plan that will allow me to save enough energy to kick out of every pin attempt, avoid every reversal, overcome every manuver. I know how to beat you, Rico Casteel, and you, Big Daddy Chris.
It is simple, really. The two of you rely on brute strength and anger to take out your opponents. I rely on my illuminating inteligence. It is nothing more than brain over brawn.
Rico Casteel, when you get angry, it is like you go into a blind fit of rage. That is why you are known as the Loose Cannon. All I have to do is stay calm let you lose your ability to think and out think you. Professional wrestling is a thinking game. But you, Mr. Casteel, are seemingly incapable of intelligent thought.
Big Daddy Chris, you are a man of brute strength. Like Mr. Casteel, your ability to think is hindered by those gigantic muscles crushing your brain. I do not have too many muscles. In fact, I am what many would call scrawny. That is why I am the best in the world. Because I can out think you muscle bound freaks of nature. I mean, is that not what happened on Asylum? Did I not out think you to get put in this match in the first place? Once my gears start rolling, you have no idea what to do. Not even an act of God can save you in this match.
Either of you.
You see, this is my chance to prove myself. This is my chance to make a name for myself. This is my chance to prove the naysayers and the conspirators wrong. This is my chance to become a champion. And neither of you will be able to stop me.
When it comes to APW Shockwave, when the dust is settled, when the lights are off, when Branden Harvey is finished being the best, there will be a new World Heavyweight Champion. And that man will be me.
The scene fades.
Lisa: I still do not see why you have to begin your training so early. It's 6:00 am. Are you stupid? Or just obsessive?
Branden: Because, Lisa, I am in the main event. This is important to me, Lisa. I need to be prepared. I need to be at the top of my game. I need to prove that I am better than BDC and Rico Casteel. I have to show everyone that I am not the loser they think I am.
Lisa: No, you do not. You are just going to cheat to win anyway. That does not prove anything. Except the fact that you are a self righteous bastard.
Branden: So? That's a part of the game. Can you name one wrestler that was ever on top that did not cheat to get there? Just one?
Lisa: I have never been a wrestling fan, Branden. I can not name one wrestler that was ever on top. I have always had a life. Then I married you.
Branden: What about since I've been wrestling? Look at Level One. He was most sucessful when he was cheating. When he stopped cheating, he was gone from the company within a few months. What does that tell you?
Lisa: What about Sally Talfourd? There is your one. She lost the title AFTER she started cheating. She was more successful when she was playing it straight. She was someone to look up to. I wonder why she has not had any Happy Endings lately?
Branden: There are anomalies in any equation. That does not mean the constant is inaccurate. As for Sally's show, it is lame anyway and I am glad not to have to watch it anymore. I have more important things to do. Like train for this World Heavyweight Championship match.
Lisa: Whatever you say. I just miss you playing by the rules. I do not like the looks I get from the ladies at the salon.
Branden: Bite your tongue, woman. I only did that to pander to those inbred idiots. But I pander no more. Those ladies are just jealous that they are not married to someone as great and mighty as me.
Lisa: If you say so. I am not going to be able to convince you anyway. I never am. Anyway, I am off to go shopping. Let me know when you need to be picked up.
Branden: I shall let you know. But it will not be for a few hours. I love you.
Lisa: I love you too. I will see you later.
They kiss. Lisa walks away. And now, Branden can finally let it be shown on his face how scared he is. You see, Branden is terrified of Rico Casteel and BDC.
Branden: Let us hope I am not killed at Shockwave. I will probably be put in a hospital bed at best.
Harvey signs in and begins his workout. The scene fades.
---------------------------
The scene opens in the home of Branden Harvey. He is sitting on the couch. He is sweating buckets. The closer we get to Shockwave, the more terrified he is. He begins to show his eloquence of speech with a promo.
Harvey: Hello, APW Universe.
He pauses, confused, annoyed, and a little taken aback.
Harvey: APW Universe? Where did I get that from? I must have heard it on TV somewhere. It sounded really lame. Anyway, let us start again.
The camera bursts to static before opening up, once again, in the home of Branden Harvey. Harvey is sitting on the couch. He begins to show his eloquence of speech with a promo.
Harvey: Hello, APW fans. I am here with the first episode in a two-part mini-series called "The Branden Harvey Main Event Anomaly." This is the show that will speak out against the conspiracy in APW. I am your host, Branden Harvey. And, as you all know, I am in the Asylum main event for APW Shockwave.
My opponents for this great championship match are the legendary Big Daddy Chris and the well-known Rico Casteel. Big Daddy Chris was a legend in EWC. Of course, he has not done anything of note in APW. Unless you count the beatdown I served him on Asylum. Rico is well-known because he... well... he really hasn't faced any tough competition yet.
Branden Harvey gets up. He walks around the room. He takes a few breaths before sitting back down. He is sweating profusely.
Harvey: Big Daddy Chris, your mind was not in it on Asylum. I do not know if you were fantasizing about that hot indian woman in the crowd or what. But you seemed to have no idea we were going to attack you until it was too late. You need to stop fantasizing about sex and focus on your competition here in APW.
Big Daddy Chris, you want to blame me for the attack. Well... go ahead. It was planned and executed by me. So, yeah, I did it through and through. Why, you ask? Because I wanted to be noticed. I am tired of being the punchline of every joke here in APW. Do you know how long it has been since I have so much as gotten a title shot in APW? I haven't been in a title match since I lost the APW Xtreme Championship back in December. I haven't had a title match at all in 2011. I did not even get a rematch for the title I lost.
Isn't that sad? I steal the show at Rasslemania. Knuckles and I have the best feud of 2011. I was even voted Rising Star of the Year back in 2010. You would think they'd give the Rising Star a title shot. But no. They did not. It did not take me long to realize there was a conspiracy against me. And I did what I had to do to overcome that conspiracy.
Beating you to a bloody pulp was just a perk.
Big Daddy Chris, you have promised to take out my Elite Posse before the match so they will not be able to interfere. Good plan. But you forgot one very important thing. I do not need the Elite Posse to back me up. Does it make things easier? Yes. Do I like it when things are easier? Yes. Can I beat you without help from my buddies? The answer is still yes. I can beat you with or without the Posse in my corner. I'll just have to work harder.
During our last match, the record book will show that you beat me. But I remember something else entirely. I recall kicking out of your pin attempt while the incompetent referee counted the three anyway. Without lucky breaks, miracles of faith, or divine intervention, you can't beat me, Bid Daddy Chris. That is a proven fact. Because you are just Big Daddy Chris while I am the great and powerful Branden Harvey. You do not stand a chance.
Now, as for you, Rico Casteel, you and I used to be friends. Or were we? I seem to recall you constantly berating me. I seem to remember you being caught on camera telling CJ Gates how much of a liability I was to the group. I seem to remember seeking your friendship and getting nothing but cold bitterness. That is, unless you wanted something. If you wanted something, you were all for talking to me.
Rico Casteel, you are one of those people that will pretend you are somebody's friend when you want something but turn your back on them when they need something. You are a user. That is pathetic.
You are pathetic.
That is why Blade and I are no longer friends with you, Mr. Casteel. We saw through you and Mr. Gates. We finally released ourselves from the grip you held on us. We undid the brainwashing that you two pathetic individuals put us through. We threw off the bonds of conspiracy and started recognizing that you were always against us.
You were just another part of the conspiracy. I mean, didn't you cause me to lose a match for the IWC... oh, sorry... APW Suicidal Championship back in November? I hit the Sonic Boom, as my inbred idiot pandering ass was calling it back then, and you just wouldn't stay down. You got up like the pathetic little girl you are and went for the cover. That is the kind of thing that proves that you are nothing more than an uncompromising opportunist.
Rico Casteel, I have never said these words to anyone before but I hate you with everything that I am. I have more hate for you than you would ever be able to comprehend. I hate you more than I hate Big Daddy Chris. I hate you more than I love my wife. Hell, I hate you more than I love my son. Why? Because you pretended to be my friend until you saw the opportunity to take advantage of our friendship, to take advantage of me, and you took that advantage to become APW Suicidal Champion.
You make me sick.
Rico Casteel, you think you can beat someone as profoundly intelligent as me? You are kidding yourself. I am the most supremely intelligent man to ever live on the face of this earth. That is how I got myself put in this match in the first place. I am a sick, sadistic human being. What are you? You are just a loose cannon.
Rico Casteel, you will attack me. You will berate me. You will even go for the pin. But your pathetic pin attempts will not faze me. They will not faze me because I have a plan. I have a plan that will allow me to save enough energy to kick out of every pin attempt, avoid every reversal, overcome every manuver. I know how to beat you, Rico Casteel, and you, Big Daddy Chris.
It is simple, really. The two of you rely on brute strength and anger to take out your opponents. I rely on my illuminating inteligence. It is nothing more than brain over brawn.
Rico Casteel, when you get angry, it is like you go into a blind fit of rage. That is why you are known as the Loose Cannon. All I have to do is stay calm let you lose your ability to think and out think you. Professional wrestling is a thinking game. But you, Mr. Casteel, are seemingly incapable of intelligent thought.
Big Daddy Chris, you are a man of brute strength. Like Mr. Casteel, your ability to think is hindered by those gigantic muscles crushing your brain. I do not have too many muscles. In fact, I am what many would call scrawny. That is why I am the best in the world. Because I can out think you muscle bound freaks of nature. I mean, is that not what happened on Asylum? Did I not out think you to get put in this match in the first place? Once my gears start rolling, you have no idea what to do. Not even an act of God can save you in this match.
Either of you.
You see, this is my chance to prove myself. This is my chance to make a name for myself. This is my chance to prove the naysayers and the conspirators wrong. This is my chance to become a champion. And neither of you will be able to stop me.
When it comes to APW Shockwave, when the dust is settled, when the lights are off, when Branden Harvey is finished being the best, there will be a new World Heavyweight Champion. And that man will be me.
The scene fades.