Post by Johnny "True Brit" Brown on Sept 1, 2011 13:55:16 GMT -4
Is it running yer mouth when ya back it up?
The question echoes around the locker room, asked to no-one in-particular but clearly directed at his detractors. “Cool Britannia” Johnny Brown sat still in his ring gear, his knee pads pulled down over his boots. Perspiration drips from 'is shaven head; as he hangs it down looking at the floor. he lifts his head up, taking a second to wipe sweat from his brow.
I 'ave been accused of talking shit about me opponents. To be fair that’s true.
I call a spade a spade, that's what I do. Of course next to me everyone looks like crap, to the common man me adversaries are the cream of the crop but I’m no common man. Well not when ya look at me accomplishments.
Me upbringing is certainly a rag to moderate riches story, but so is everyone else's on the APW roster. All of us 'ave 'ad ball-kicking, arse-stomping lives. Only our individual drives to succeed 'ave got us this far.
To many this is as far as they will ever go, kicking around jerking the curtain as the APW fans find their seats or buy their merch. Many aspire to get as 'igh as being the piss-break match, it would at least represent moving up the card.
But for the select few, the elite ya could call them they will wear gold. That's me next step; after a few short weeks in me new 'ome I 'ave earned a shot at Jason Kash's Tap-Out title.
The English Hardman stands to grab a white towel, he drapes it over his head, rubs briskly then tosses it away. He opens his eyes to see a poster for the very show that is playing out a few dozen feet away.
APW's Shockwave.
On the title the names and faces of APW's top Megastars can be seen. At the bottom in small type it says “for the live crowd only a battle royal” then above, managing to make the main card “#1 Contender for Tap Out Title”
To get 'ere I 'ad to beat down 6 others in a battle royal; seen only by those that were at the show, to even earn a shot at earning a shot. But as always I went 'ell for leather and came out on top.
Misawa, 'itch, Knoxville, King, Demon, 'opper and Morrison all names that are known across this industry we call wrestling and all names that are on me list of victims.
The list is due to get bigger, the aforementioned Tap-Out Champion Jason Kash... yer next!
A complicated beast of a man Kash is known for being 'ard 'itting in and out of the ring. 'is penchant for the green leaf 'asn't appeared to 'ad any negative effects on 'is ring work, or so the uneducated claim; the same can not be said for 'is psyche.
Schizophrenia, bipolar disorders, and major depression are often argued as side-effects of excessive cannabis use. Jason doesn't seem to display any of these problems, perhaps all 'e needs is a catalyst to send 'im spiralling down on the road to nowhere. When I wipe the mat with 'im in our inevitable clash be the trigger?
Personally I don't care.
As soon as the match is signed me opponent is me enemy, when the match is over and I look down at me foes broken body I feel no pity, they were stupid enough to sign their name on the dotted line, foolishly thinking they 'ad what is took to beat me. They 'ave to live with the consequences of their incorrect assumption.
'ayley 'itch put up a fight, more then I'd considered p'haps, for a woman she did OK. Now she can go back to washing dishes and sucking di*k on birthdays like all women; an' I can win gold.
Jase, do ya remember back before ya won yer title? I wasn't in APW at the time but me people 'ave people who look into the $hit for me. They send me transcripts and footage of all ya ponderings
What did I see when I looked through ya back catalogue of 'its?
“I'm not a submission wrestler” ya said it yerself, yet in the very next match ya won the Tap-Out title; a title that can only be won by submission...
Not bad eh! That was three months ago and the strap is still firmly around ya waist, so either ya underestimated yer abilities or yer words were just a green tinted smokescreen.
No matter what is the truth when we meet at Asylum ya will be put to the test.
Allow me to slip in “Knoxville mode TM” and share me 'istory with ya.
Part of me vast training took place in Wigan, more specifically the Aspull Wrestling Club.
Means nothing to most of the APW roster and fans does it? The AWC can trace it roots back the the infamous “Snake Pit”. Started by Billy Riley; the pit trained the best 'ookers in the world.
Not the sort of 'ookers ya surround yerself with Kash, but the 'ardest men that ever walked the planet, an' that's not BS. Right now as 'ard as I am I don't consider meself at the level of Gotch, Robinson or Dempsey.
They're True Brit with true Grit, they could chew on metal and sh*t out nails, they are me inspiration, as ya Yanks might say NO GAY.
In respect for their legend, in 'omage for all the 'ave accomplished yet get little recognition for I will make to scream like a virgin when she gets 'er first boning. y’all be tapping that match like a woodpecker on the first day of spring... do ya get me point or do I need to keep the analogies coming?
Why do I get the impression yer answer is “like whatever man.. do ya 'ave any weed?” That's what I don’t get about ya Kash, ya seem focused, driven but at the same time ya allow yerself to be 'eld back by yer “hobby”.
Just think “Money Man" if yer truly focused what ya could achieve? I've seen yer matches and ya don't 'ave the staying power to outlast me; ya get blown up too quick. For ya each match is a mad dash, sure the critics will say yer more exciting than, me.
They like the balls to the wall style but fer me its a marathon not a sprint. I love the ebb and flow of a match, I relish feeling me opponents energy slipping away as I grow stronger. Like a leach I suck it up and use it to push meself further. I can guess already 'ow that will be misquoted..
12+ years in this sport, with 'is out of the ring 'abits and in-ring style can 'e maintain the level 'e is at right now? Or will a 'ungry British bulldog bite 'is legs off then dry 'ump 'im as 'e lays bleeding..
Don't get excited “Blunt Burner” I don't mean that literally, there's no way I’m biting ya, ya probably bleed green, and I don't mean the color of all money ya make.
Enjoy the prize ya possess for the moment mate, clean it up and carry it proudly into our match, then...
...just before you ad to to the ref so 'e can show the great unwashed in the crowd why we are going to war, kiss it... not for luck but to say goodbye.
Get yer tapping 'and ready Jase yer gonna need it.
The alarm clocks glows green, flashing 4:20 across the room, a convenient time perhaps but in reality a reflection of how long ago the occupants should have dragged themselves from their pits to slot into the grind that is life.
Evidently the rat race is not high on their priority list.
Thick blackout blinds blot out the too bright rays of the morning sun. Spread across the sweaty craphole of a bed is a cheaply tattooed pale skinny scraping from the bottom of life's barrel with his chosen wench of the evening, her ribs showing through her translucent skin.
In the adjacent room a flatscreen virtually begs for someone to press start on their x-box controller so they can embark on a killing spree against the opposition of the moment.
This room is even worse than the befouled boudoir. Graffiti covers the white walls, with the remnants of carpet hidden beneath the waste on the floor.
You could be forgiven for thinking Jesse Pinkman could walk in the room any minute and toss some blue meth for the trashpile around the room. Then they would come like drug-addled zombies emerging from beneath pizza boxes and beer cans to claim their prize.
Instead the hottest act in APW walks in the embodiment of Cool Britannia Johnny Brown.
A real den of inequity, typical of America and it's over-indulgent nature. Beneath its wholesome image the core of the nation is sleazy and corrupt.
Whafting the stench of human decay from his nose Johnny leaves behind the living dead to step outside into the sunshine.
All of those people in there were once respectable, they lived in this community of white picket fences, 2 and a half children where everyone drives a hybrid. But they opened the gateway..
By that I mean what many call the gateway drug; Cannabis.
Now before ya sigh and utter “not another Kash is a junkie tirade, no this is merely used to segue into me true words of wisdom.
Ya see to me Kash is me gateway, a gateway to the top of APW; the shot at the Tap-Out title opened the gate for me and when I make his tap to the Go Home! I'll kick it off its stinkin' hinges and charge up the path to the APW's front door when I claim the World title.
Don't think I'm looking past the Money Maker, he's a tough one that’s fer sure; but I’m tougher!
It's obvious why!!
I'm British!!
Kash ya will be the first to fall the Empire's foot soldier. There is no way in 'ell that you'll make me tap to yer Marijuana Withdraws
I will be the fourth person to 'old the beautiful black and gold Tap Out title, I thin I'll spray it the colours of the Union Flag so all of ya can remember who really built this nation of yours.
Once I have struck gold for the first time in APW I’ll get that feeling like a shark when blood gets in the water. I will become alive like you've never seen before. Me instincts will kick in, I will damn near not even have to think, just DO!
The Tap-Out title is not the pinnacle of me career it is just the start, with a beginning as prestigious as your title Kash my ultimate goal could well be beyond your comprehension.
Yer want Action-Packed do ya? Just wait an' see what me and me sponsors 'ave planned for all of ya, no-one is safe me 18 holer's are gonna stomp ya all into the mat. Kash ya gonna be made in to an example of things ta come.
I f'king dare ya not to take me seriously! I dare ya to make stupid jokes and chat shit with ya buddy Borderland, consider this wet behind the ears new boy beneath ya and you'll f'kin regret it.
Concern yerself with the tag titles an' Havok an' Talfourd breathing down yer neck, that way it'll be all that much sweeter when I kick yer head in and make you my bitch.
At Asylum yer can make it easy on yerself Jase, just tap, make it quick, avoid permanent damage so you'll live ta fight another day.
Now where's my cut to static?
The question echoes around the locker room, asked to no-one in-particular but clearly directed at his detractors. “Cool Britannia” Johnny Brown sat still in his ring gear, his knee pads pulled down over his boots. Perspiration drips from 'is shaven head; as he hangs it down looking at the floor. he lifts his head up, taking a second to wipe sweat from his brow.
I 'ave been accused of talking shit about me opponents. To be fair that’s true.
I call a spade a spade, that's what I do. Of course next to me everyone looks like crap, to the common man me adversaries are the cream of the crop but I’m no common man. Well not when ya look at me accomplishments.
Me upbringing is certainly a rag to moderate riches story, but so is everyone else's on the APW roster. All of us 'ave 'ad ball-kicking, arse-stomping lives. Only our individual drives to succeed 'ave got us this far.
To many this is as far as they will ever go, kicking around jerking the curtain as the APW fans find their seats or buy their merch. Many aspire to get as 'igh as being the piss-break match, it would at least represent moving up the card.
But for the select few, the elite ya could call them they will wear gold. That's me next step; after a few short weeks in me new 'ome I 'ave earned a shot at Jason Kash's Tap-Out title.
The English Hardman stands to grab a white towel, he drapes it over his head, rubs briskly then tosses it away. He opens his eyes to see a poster for the very show that is playing out a few dozen feet away.
APW's Shockwave.
On the title the names and faces of APW's top Megastars can be seen. At the bottom in small type it says “for the live crowd only a battle royal” then above, managing to make the main card “#1 Contender for Tap Out Title”
To get 'ere I 'ad to beat down 6 others in a battle royal; seen only by those that were at the show, to even earn a shot at earning a shot. But as always I went 'ell for leather and came out on top.
Misawa, 'itch, Knoxville, King, Demon, 'opper and Morrison all names that are known across this industry we call wrestling and all names that are on me list of victims.
The list is due to get bigger, the aforementioned Tap-Out Champion Jason Kash... yer next!
A complicated beast of a man Kash is known for being 'ard 'itting in and out of the ring. 'is penchant for the green leaf 'asn't appeared to 'ad any negative effects on 'is ring work, or so the uneducated claim; the same can not be said for 'is psyche.
Schizophrenia, bipolar disorders, and major depression are often argued as side-effects of excessive cannabis use. Jason doesn't seem to display any of these problems, perhaps all 'e needs is a catalyst to send 'im spiralling down on the road to nowhere. When I wipe the mat with 'im in our inevitable clash be the trigger?
Personally I don't care.
As soon as the match is signed me opponent is me enemy, when the match is over and I look down at me foes broken body I feel no pity, they were stupid enough to sign their name on the dotted line, foolishly thinking they 'ad what is took to beat me. They 'ave to live with the consequences of their incorrect assumption.
'ayley 'itch put up a fight, more then I'd considered p'haps, for a woman she did OK. Now she can go back to washing dishes and sucking di*k on birthdays like all women; an' I can win gold.
Jase, do ya remember back before ya won yer title? I wasn't in APW at the time but me people 'ave people who look into the $hit for me. They send me transcripts and footage of all ya ponderings
What did I see when I looked through ya back catalogue of 'its?
“I'm not a submission wrestler” ya said it yerself, yet in the very next match ya won the Tap-Out title; a title that can only be won by submission...
Not bad eh! That was three months ago and the strap is still firmly around ya waist, so either ya underestimated yer abilities or yer words were just a green tinted smokescreen.
No matter what is the truth when we meet at Asylum ya will be put to the test.
Allow me to slip in “Knoxville mode TM” and share me 'istory with ya.
Part of me vast training took place in Wigan, more specifically the Aspull Wrestling Club.
Means nothing to most of the APW roster and fans does it? The AWC can trace it roots back the the infamous “Snake Pit”. Started by Billy Riley; the pit trained the best 'ookers in the world.
Not the sort of 'ookers ya surround yerself with Kash, but the 'ardest men that ever walked the planet, an' that's not BS. Right now as 'ard as I am I don't consider meself at the level of Gotch, Robinson or Dempsey.
They're True Brit with true Grit, they could chew on metal and sh*t out nails, they are me inspiration, as ya Yanks might say NO GAY.
In respect for their legend, in 'omage for all the 'ave accomplished yet get little recognition for I will make to scream like a virgin when she gets 'er first boning. y’all be tapping that match like a woodpecker on the first day of spring... do ya get me point or do I need to keep the analogies coming?
Why do I get the impression yer answer is “like whatever man.. do ya 'ave any weed?” That's what I don’t get about ya Kash, ya seem focused, driven but at the same time ya allow yerself to be 'eld back by yer “hobby”.
Just think “Money Man" if yer truly focused what ya could achieve? I've seen yer matches and ya don't 'ave the staying power to outlast me; ya get blown up too quick. For ya each match is a mad dash, sure the critics will say yer more exciting than, me.
They like the balls to the wall style but fer me its a marathon not a sprint. I love the ebb and flow of a match, I relish feeling me opponents energy slipping away as I grow stronger. Like a leach I suck it up and use it to push meself further. I can guess already 'ow that will be misquoted..
12+ years in this sport, with 'is out of the ring 'abits and in-ring style can 'e maintain the level 'e is at right now? Or will a 'ungry British bulldog bite 'is legs off then dry 'ump 'im as 'e lays bleeding..
Don't get excited “Blunt Burner” I don't mean that literally, there's no way I’m biting ya, ya probably bleed green, and I don't mean the color of all money ya make.
Enjoy the prize ya possess for the moment mate, clean it up and carry it proudly into our match, then...
...just before you ad to to the ref so 'e can show the great unwashed in the crowd why we are going to war, kiss it... not for luck but to say goodbye.
Get yer tapping 'and ready Jase yer gonna need it.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
The alarm clocks glows green, flashing 4:20 across the room, a convenient time perhaps but in reality a reflection of how long ago the occupants should have dragged themselves from their pits to slot into the grind that is life.
Evidently the rat race is not high on their priority list.
Thick blackout blinds blot out the too bright rays of the morning sun. Spread across the sweaty craphole of a bed is a cheaply tattooed pale skinny scraping from the bottom of life's barrel with his chosen wench of the evening, her ribs showing through her translucent skin.
In the adjacent room a flatscreen virtually begs for someone to press start on their x-box controller so they can embark on a killing spree against the opposition of the moment.
This room is even worse than the befouled boudoir. Graffiti covers the white walls, with the remnants of carpet hidden beneath the waste on the floor.
You could be forgiven for thinking Jesse Pinkman could walk in the room any minute and toss some blue meth for the trashpile around the room. Then they would come like drug-addled zombies emerging from beneath pizza boxes and beer cans to claim their prize.
Instead the hottest act in APW walks in the embodiment of Cool Britannia Johnny Brown.
A real den of inequity, typical of America and it's over-indulgent nature. Beneath its wholesome image the core of the nation is sleazy and corrupt.
Whafting the stench of human decay from his nose Johnny leaves behind the living dead to step outside into the sunshine.
All of those people in there were once respectable, they lived in this community of white picket fences, 2 and a half children where everyone drives a hybrid. But they opened the gateway..
By that I mean what many call the gateway drug; Cannabis.
Now before ya sigh and utter “not another Kash is a junkie tirade, no this is merely used to segue into me true words of wisdom.
Ya see to me Kash is me gateway, a gateway to the top of APW; the shot at the Tap-Out title opened the gate for me and when I make his tap to the Go Home! I'll kick it off its stinkin' hinges and charge up the path to the APW's front door when I claim the World title.
Don't think I'm looking past the Money Maker, he's a tough one that’s fer sure; but I’m tougher!
It's obvious why!!
I'm British!!
Kash ya will be the first to fall the Empire's foot soldier. There is no way in 'ell that you'll make me tap to yer Marijuana Withdraws
I will be the fourth person to 'old the beautiful black and gold Tap Out title, I thin I'll spray it the colours of the Union Flag so all of ya can remember who really built this nation of yours.
Once I have struck gold for the first time in APW I’ll get that feeling like a shark when blood gets in the water. I will become alive like you've never seen before. Me instincts will kick in, I will damn near not even have to think, just DO!
The Tap-Out title is not the pinnacle of me career it is just the start, with a beginning as prestigious as your title Kash my ultimate goal could well be beyond your comprehension.
Yer want Action-Packed do ya? Just wait an' see what me and me sponsors 'ave planned for all of ya, no-one is safe me 18 holer's are gonna stomp ya all into the mat. Kash ya gonna be made in to an example of things ta come.
I f'king dare ya not to take me seriously! I dare ya to make stupid jokes and chat shit with ya buddy Borderland, consider this wet behind the ears new boy beneath ya and you'll f'kin regret it.
Concern yerself with the tag titles an' Havok an' Talfourd breathing down yer neck, that way it'll be all that much sweeter when I kick yer head in and make you my bitch.
At Asylum yer can make it easy on yerself Jase, just tap, make it quick, avoid permanent damage so you'll live ta fight another day.
Now where's my cut to static?
