Post by C.J. Gates on Oct 19, 2011 0:01:20 GMT -4
"We have a problem."
The scene opens up in one of the hallways of the arena where Pookie LaBraun can be seen talking on a cell phone.
Pookie: No, no nothing like that...No listen. The eagle has landed...The eagle. Has. Landed...Jesus, he found the Rabbi...Exactly...Yeah, I'm there right now, listening to what their talking about...It's in my car, I'll go grab it...Alright see you soon.
Pookie hangs up his phone and glances around the doorway of the locker room. Inside APW World Heavyweight champion Rico Casteel can be seen pacing the length of the room with the title around his waist. Seated in a chair near the far wall holding a newspaper in his hands is The Rappin' Rabbi.
Rabbi: Tommy Knoxville.
Rico: Six foot three, two hundred twenty three pounds. Technical, aerial and a grappler, he covers it all and has a storied past. Past run ins with Jason Kash that have never ended well. Claims to be working toward this moment, yet didn't actually win a match to qualify. Finisher is the Sativa Vice.
Rabbi: Manhattan White.
Rico: Six foot four, one hundred ninety two pounds. Hardcore style with a flash of finesse. A successful business man that has found a new home in APW where he came cause havoc. The only other person who didn't win a match to get into the chamber. Finisher is the Screaming Silence.
Rabbi: Mike Morrison.
Rico: Six foot one, two hundred twenty pounds, and completely out of his mind. A brawler with a technical side to himself. Defeated one of the more promising individuals in Shane Borderland to qualify. Finisher is the Madness Effect.
Rabbi: Sally Talfourd.
Rico: Five foot eleven, one hundred forty five pounds, and thinks she has a chance to win the title. A technician with speed who loves to use her legs to her advantage. Former APW World champion on the Overdrive side of things, looking to be the first two hold both main titles. Her finisher is the Happy Ending.
Rabbi: Jason Kash.
Rico: Six foot two, two hundred fifty five pounds, and a sorry excuse for a man. Former APW Tap Out champion and current APW Tag Team champion. He's a technical brawler who enjoys going extreme when he has to. Finisher is the U.T.I.
The Rabbi nods his head and gives his beard a stroke before shrugging his shoulders.
Rabbi: What was the point of all of that?
Rico: They don't think I'm ready. My opponents don't think that I know enough about them to be able to stop their attempts to usurp me from my throne. They sit on their high horses and mock me, they claim that I am simply here because I took it and didn't earn it. They say that I just go into a match blindly, never really learning enough about my opponents. So that is what I did. I learned. I studied. I made sure that I was ready for whatever they had to throw my way once we step into that chamber.
The Rabbi nods his head slightly.
Rabbi: I'm still shocked you have the title. I mean, you've got skills and everything, but the last time I saw you, you were getting awfully close to losing it to Branden Harvey.
Rico: That chump would never have beaten me. Sure, he was able to get my shoulders down for a few seconds but I never felt like he was in line to win. I knew I had that match well in hand. But Harvey is and always will be the past, Eli. The future is the Extreme Elimination Chamber. The future is retaining my title.
Colonel: What in the, I say, what in the name of Robert E. Lee is going on in here?
Colonel Frederick de LaFontaine the third walks into the room, clad in his usual mustard outfit.
Rico: What are you doing here? This is not your area of expertise.
Colonel: But it's his?
Rico: Yes, it is.
Rabbi: What is going on here?
Colonel: That's exactly what I'm asking.
Rabbi: No, no, I mean with you.
Colonel: What...do you mean?
Rabbi: Rico, you do know that this isn't your lovable Colonel, right?
Rico glares over at the Colonel who is visibly sweating. The sweat causes the fake beard to slip out of place.
Colonel: Don't listen to him!
Rico stares at the man.
Rico: Caleb?
Pookie reaches up and touches the beard before cursing and turning around and running from the room. Rico glances over at the Rappin' Rabbi who shrugs with a smile on his face.
Rabbi: You surround yourself with some crazy ass characters, Rico.
Rico: And I still manage to win and hold onto my title. Who I surround myself with does not affect my in ring performance.
Rabbi: Good. That's where you need to be for this defense.
Rico smiles and nods as the scene fades to black.
"The time is almost upon us.
"The time when each and every one of you will realize why I am the APW World Heavyweight. Why I have been holding this title for months. Why I chased James Chambers out of APW. Why I ended the career of Delilah. Why Branden Harvey looked like a training dummy at Shockwave.
"You all deny it now. You all call me a phony, a false God, a fake champion. You say that my days are numbered. But what do the five of you know? Three of you have amounted to nothing in APW while the other two of you are just living pipe dreams. One can't see through his own cloud of smoke while the other has yet to be heard from, yet still thinks she can win.
"Ridiculous.
"What makes any of you think you have what it takes to win my title. To take my place. To rule the Asylum. Do any of you have any idea what it takes? Maybe Sally Talfourd does, but ever since she has come to the Asylum she has done very little. Reginald and Jeff gave her a title shot without even earning it, and she promptly fucked it up. She left her partner high and dry. Sure, she might have been the APW champion on the Overdrive side of things for awhile, but what has she really amounted to here? What has she done since then? Lost one match after another after another until she got a lucky win over a nobody to get a shot at my title.
"Pathetic. Absolutely pathetic. She has nothing going for her right now. She might have won at Asylum for our team, but the match didn't matter. The match didn't matter one bit. That match was all about pain and punishment for our opponents. For that piece of trash Jason Kash. Another man who has no claim to my title. Another pretender. A man so hopped up on drugs that he thinks he actually has a shot to win. To sit on my throne. What a piece of work.
"But then again, all of these opponents are pieces of work. All of these opponents are sorry excuses for challengers to my title. I'll say it until I'm blue in the face that half of them don't even deserve to be here. Let us not forget that those are the same three that have come into APW for one reason or another and failed to hit the ground running.
"Mike Morrison.
"Manhattan White.
"Tommy Knoxville.
"Together they make nothing.
"Together they make this main event a bit less interesting. Even the peasants can see that they won't be winning the World title. Even their servants can see that they aren't going to be moving into the big leagues by the end of the Pay-Per-View.
"Though I admit they are entertaining.
"Watching Mike Morrison play make believe with Goldie, claiming that he's coming for her, for my title. Laughable. Watching as he professes his love for my belt. Hysterical. I give the man credit though. Never in a million years would I believe there is a man whose mind is less and less stable than mine own, yet here he is. Granted, that instability doesn't exactly mean he will translate into a champion. It won't translate into a powerful massacre inside of that chamber. It won't be what I throw out there. It won't be what the King demonstrates inside of that structure.
"Mikey, what you are about to witness is something that you are never going to be prepared for. What will happen to you in Japan is going to be Hell on Earth. If you've seen any of the matches I have been in where weapons are involved, you will see what kind of shit storm you're in for. You will remember Shockwave better than anything else, and you will remember how I nearly decimated Branden Harvey. Look back and watch at how I nearly beheaded dear Delilah. Watch when I won the APW Suicidal title. Watch the mayhem that I have created ever since day one. Literally. My first moment in APW, then called IWC, I made sure that no one heard any more peeps from the Crimson Ghost.
"You think that I don't treat my title properly? How so? Because I defend her honor? Because I make sure that she always has somewhere to rest? Because I will do anything to keep her close to me? What difference would you make would you make love to the title, Mikey? Is that the difference?
"Entertaining, yes. A threat to my title? Definitely not. Not by a long shot, Morrison.
"But you're not the only halfwit that has been put inside of this chamber.
"There's Tommy Knoxville, a man so fired up with trying to outdo Jason Kash that he doesn't realize the trap he is walking into. He got lucky at Asylum when he teamed with Sally and myself but this week he won't be so lucky. You hear that Tommy? You think you've got it all figured out because of what you've been able to do in the past, but this isn't the past. This is the present. This is my present. This is the realm that I dominate. People like you are the people who need to be squashed underfoot. The ones that think they have what it takes, but when hope becomes application, they fail. Hard. Just like you will fail hard.
"You might pride yourself on going hardcore or being extreme, but you are out of your league when it comes to being in the ring against me. Which you will see one time and one time only. After that you will be no more. Much to Jason Kash's joy.
"Then there is Manhattan White, a man who...well, a man that has no chance in hell at winning my title. Really, it will come down to two people that will have a chance to dethrone me, and you are not one of them. You might talk a big game, you might be able to run me down and threaten me about losing my title to...someone. But you, you're going to only be doing one thing at One Night in Hell, and that is being used as a target dummy. As fodder. As someone that will have all of our anger taken out on them. And no matter what you say, there is nothing you can do to change that. You've done nothing to earn this title opportunity and you will see that. You will realize that. When you're laying in a pool of blood and broken teeth you will, looking up to the lights, you will see how this entire 'opportunity' was a waste of your time.
"Of your life.
"But you are not the big fish that I have my eye on. That I am set on paying back for everything that you have done to me ever since we began butting heads. Ever since we have been going back and forth in this little game. You've been hungry for my title, and I must say that is something that I admire. Someone that is as hungry as I was. Someone that wants this title as much as I did. But the difference between you and me, is that I succeeded in my goal. I succeeded in doing what others dared not do. Back when I was in the hunt for James' title, nobody was stepping up except for me and Chris Cyrus. Nobody wanted to test their hand. And now, there are five of you. Five of you who think that you have a chance at success.
"Forget that. You can poke fun about how I am an easier target when I'm not. You can poke fun about how nobody wanted to fight James Chambers, how they were afraid. But that would be wrong. No, Jason, the difference between now and then is that now, the peasants are getting greedy. The peasants are all thinking over their heads. They don't realize that they have no fucking chance at beating me. You can line up and take your shots at me, and you can slap me in the face with toilet paper, Jason, but I am just going to hit back twice as hard. I am just going to hit back.
"I'm not running.
"I'm not going to pull the same stunts James Chambers did. I am not going to turn tail and disappear because I can't stomach defending my title. I welcome competition. I welcome the hunters trying to make me their prey. Or at least, try and make me your prey. I welcome it all because I will turn it all away. I will do what James Chambers couldn't do. I will face competition in the face and I won't look away.
"You might think of all of this as useless information, Jason, but you can't deny it's proof. You can't deny that I have welcomed everyone that has come for my title. The Cyrus', the Harvey's, the BD-fucking-C's, and the entire lot of you. I've welcomed it. And everyone that I have faced off against has felt my wrath. Has felt the terror of the Loose Cannon. So what makes this match different, huh? What makes this chamber different then my past defenses?
"Nothing does.
"Because at the end of this match, I will still be sitting on my throne. I will still be known as the APW World Heavyweight champion. And there is nothing you guys can do. Nothing that Morrison, Knoxville, Talfourd, White or even you Kash, there is nothing that the five of you can do to stop my reign.
"You are all usurpers, and in my kingdom, that is grounds for treason. That is grounds for extermination from my realm.
"Your extermination will come at One Night in Hell.
"The Kingdom of Madness will continue."
The scene opens up in one of the hallways of the arena where Pookie LaBraun can be seen talking on a cell phone.
Pookie: No, no nothing like that...No listen. The eagle has landed...The eagle. Has. Landed...Jesus, he found the Rabbi...Exactly...Yeah, I'm there right now, listening to what their talking about...It's in my car, I'll go grab it...Alright see you soon.
Pookie hangs up his phone and glances around the doorway of the locker room. Inside APW World Heavyweight champion Rico Casteel can be seen pacing the length of the room with the title around his waist. Seated in a chair near the far wall holding a newspaper in his hands is The Rappin' Rabbi.
Rabbi: Tommy Knoxville.
Rico: Six foot three, two hundred twenty three pounds. Technical, aerial and a grappler, he covers it all and has a storied past. Past run ins with Jason Kash that have never ended well. Claims to be working toward this moment, yet didn't actually win a match to qualify. Finisher is the Sativa Vice.
Rabbi: Manhattan White.
Rico: Six foot four, one hundred ninety two pounds. Hardcore style with a flash of finesse. A successful business man that has found a new home in APW where he came cause havoc. The only other person who didn't win a match to get into the chamber. Finisher is the Screaming Silence.
Rabbi: Mike Morrison.
Rico: Six foot one, two hundred twenty pounds, and completely out of his mind. A brawler with a technical side to himself. Defeated one of the more promising individuals in Shane Borderland to qualify. Finisher is the Madness Effect.
Rabbi: Sally Talfourd.
Rico: Five foot eleven, one hundred forty five pounds, and thinks she has a chance to win the title. A technician with speed who loves to use her legs to her advantage. Former APW World champion on the Overdrive side of things, looking to be the first two hold both main titles. Her finisher is the Happy Ending.
Rabbi: Jason Kash.
Rico: Six foot two, two hundred fifty five pounds, and a sorry excuse for a man. Former APW Tap Out champion and current APW Tag Team champion. He's a technical brawler who enjoys going extreme when he has to. Finisher is the U.T.I.
The Rabbi nods his head and gives his beard a stroke before shrugging his shoulders.
Rabbi: What was the point of all of that?
Rico: They don't think I'm ready. My opponents don't think that I know enough about them to be able to stop their attempts to usurp me from my throne. They sit on their high horses and mock me, they claim that I am simply here because I took it and didn't earn it. They say that I just go into a match blindly, never really learning enough about my opponents. So that is what I did. I learned. I studied. I made sure that I was ready for whatever they had to throw my way once we step into that chamber.
The Rabbi nods his head slightly.
Rabbi: I'm still shocked you have the title. I mean, you've got skills and everything, but the last time I saw you, you were getting awfully close to losing it to Branden Harvey.
Rico: That chump would never have beaten me. Sure, he was able to get my shoulders down for a few seconds but I never felt like he was in line to win. I knew I had that match well in hand. But Harvey is and always will be the past, Eli. The future is the Extreme Elimination Chamber. The future is retaining my title.
Colonel: What in the, I say, what in the name of Robert E. Lee is going on in here?
Colonel Frederick de LaFontaine the third walks into the room, clad in his usual mustard outfit.
Rico: What are you doing here? This is not your area of expertise.
Colonel: But it's his?
Rico: Yes, it is.
Rabbi: What is going on here?
Colonel: That's exactly what I'm asking.
Rabbi: No, no, I mean with you.
Colonel: What...do you mean?
Rabbi: Rico, you do know that this isn't your lovable Colonel, right?
Rico glares over at the Colonel who is visibly sweating. The sweat causes the fake beard to slip out of place.
Colonel: Don't listen to him!
Rico stares at the man.
Rico: Caleb?
Pookie reaches up and touches the beard before cursing and turning around and running from the room. Rico glances over at the Rappin' Rabbi who shrugs with a smile on his face.
Rabbi: You surround yourself with some crazy ass characters, Rico.
Rico: And I still manage to win and hold onto my title. Who I surround myself with does not affect my in ring performance.
Rabbi: Good. That's where you need to be for this defense.
Rico smiles and nods as the scene fades to black.
"The time is almost upon us.
"The time when each and every one of you will realize why I am the APW World Heavyweight. Why I have been holding this title for months. Why I chased James Chambers out of APW. Why I ended the career of Delilah. Why Branden Harvey looked like a training dummy at Shockwave.
"You all deny it now. You all call me a phony, a false God, a fake champion. You say that my days are numbered. But what do the five of you know? Three of you have amounted to nothing in APW while the other two of you are just living pipe dreams. One can't see through his own cloud of smoke while the other has yet to be heard from, yet still thinks she can win.
"Ridiculous.
"What makes any of you think you have what it takes to win my title. To take my place. To rule the Asylum. Do any of you have any idea what it takes? Maybe Sally Talfourd does, but ever since she has come to the Asylum she has done very little. Reginald and Jeff gave her a title shot without even earning it, and she promptly fucked it up. She left her partner high and dry. Sure, she might have been the APW champion on the Overdrive side of things for awhile, but what has she really amounted to here? What has she done since then? Lost one match after another after another until she got a lucky win over a nobody to get a shot at my title.
"Pathetic. Absolutely pathetic. She has nothing going for her right now. She might have won at Asylum for our team, but the match didn't matter. The match didn't matter one bit. That match was all about pain and punishment for our opponents. For that piece of trash Jason Kash. Another man who has no claim to my title. Another pretender. A man so hopped up on drugs that he thinks he actually has a shot to win. To sit on my throne. What a piece of work.
"But then again, all of these opponents are pieces of work. All of these opponents are sorry excuses for challengers to my title. I'll say it until I'm blue in the face that half of them don't even deserve to be here. Let us not forget that those are the same three that have come into APW for one reason or another and failed to hit the ground running.
"Mike Morrison.
"Manhattan White.
"Tommy Knoxville.
"Together they make nothing.
"Together they make this main event a bit less interesting. Even the peasants can see that they won't be winning the World title. Even their servants can see that they aren't going to be moving into the big leagues by the end of the Pay-Per-View.
"Though I admit they are entertaining.
"Watching Mike Morrison play make believe with Goldie, claiming that he's coming for her, for my title. Laughable. Watching as he professes his love for my belt. Hysterical. I give the man credit though. Never in a million years would I believe there is a man whose mind is less and less stable than mine own, yet here he is. Granted, that instability doesn't exactly mean he will translate into a champion. It won't translate into a powerful massacre inside of that chamber. It won't be what I throw out there. It won't be what the King demonstrates inside of that structure.
"Mikey, what you are about to witness is something that you are never going to be prepared for. What will happen to you in Japan is going to be Hell on Earth. If you've seen any of the matches I have been in where weapons are involved, you will see what kind of shit storm you're in for. You will remember Shockwave better than anything else, and you will remember how I nearly decimated Branden Harvey. Look back and watch at how I nearly beheaded dear Delilah. Watch when I won the APW Suicidal title. Watch the mayhem that I have created ever since day one. Literally. My first moment in APW, then called IWC, I made sure that no one heard any more peeps from the Crimson Ghost.
"You think that I don't treat my title properly? How so? Because I defend her honor? Because I make sure that she always has somewhere to rest? Because I will do anything to keep her close to me? What difference would you make would you make love to the title, Mikey? Is that the difference?
"Entertaining, yes. A threat to my title? Definitely not. Not by a long shot, Morrison.
"But you're not the only halfwit that has been put inside of this chamber.
"There's Tommy Knoxville, a man so fired up with trying to outdo Jason Kash that he doesn't realize the trap he is walking into. He got lucky at Asylum when he teamed with Sally and myself but this week he won't be so lucky. You hear that Tommy? You think you've got it all figured out because of what you've been able to do in the past, but this isn't the past. This is the present. This is my present. This is the realm that I dominate. People like you are the people who need to be squashed underfoot. The ones that think they have what it takes, but when hope becomes application, they fail. Hard. Just like you will fail hard.
"You might pride yourself on going hardcore or being extreme, but you are out of your league when it comes to being in the ring against me. Which you will see one time and one time only. After that you will be no more. Much to Jason Kash's joy.
"Then there is Manhattan White, a man who...well, a man that has no chance in hell at winning my title. Really, it will come down to two people that will have a chance to dethrone me, and you are not one of them. You might talk a big game, you might be able to run me down and threaten me about losing my title to...someone. But you, you're going to only be doing one thing at One Night in Hell, and that is being used as a target dummy. As fodder. As someone that will have all of our anger taken out on them. And no matter what you say, there is nothing you can do to change that. You've done nothing to earn this title opportunity and you will see that. You will realize that. When you're laying in a pool of blood and broken teeth you will, looking up to the lights, you will see how this entire 'opportunity' was a waste of your time.
"Of your life.
"But you are not the big fish that I have my eye on. That I am set on paying back for everything that you have done to me ever since we began butting heads. Ever since we have been going back and forth in this little game. You've been hungry for my title, and I must say that is something that I admire. Someone that is as hungry as I was. Someone that wants this title as much as I did. But the difference between you and me, is that I succeeded in my goal. I succeeded in doing what others dared not do. Back when I was in the hunt for James' title, nobody was stepping up except for me and Chris Cyrus. Nobody wanted to test their hand. And now, there are five of you. Five of you who think that you have a chance at success.
"Forget that. You can poke fun about how I am an easier target when I'm not. You can poke fun about how nobody wanted to fight James Chambers, how they were afraid. But that would be wrong. No, Jason, the difference between now and then is that now, the peasants are getting greedy. The peasants are all thinking over their heads. They don't realize that they have no fucking chance at beating me. You can line up and take your shots at me, and you can slap me in the face with toilet paper, Jason, but I am just going to hit back twice as hard. I am just going to hit back.
"I'm not running.
"I'm not going to pull the same stunts James Chambers did. I am not going to turn tail and disappear because I can't stomach defending my title. I welcome competition. I welcome the hunters trying to make me their prey. Or at least, try and make me your prey. I welcome it all because I will turn it all away. I will do what James Chambers couldn't do. I will face competition in the face and I won't look away.
"You might think of all of this as useless information, Jason, but you can't deny it's proof. You can't deny that I have welcomed everyone that has come for my title. The Cyrus', the Harvey's, the BD-fucking-C's, and the entire lot of you. I've welcomed it. And everyone that I have faced off against has felt my wrath. Has felt the terror of the Loose Cannon. So what makes this match different, huh? What makes this chamber different then my past defenses?
"Nothing does.
"Because at the end of this match, I will still be sitting on my throne. I will still be known as the APW World Heavyweight champion. And there is nothing you guys can do. Nothing that Morrison, Knoxville, Talfourd, White or even you Kash, there is nothing that the five of you can do to stop my reign.
"You are all usurpers, and in my kingdom, that is grounds for treason. That is grounds for extermination from my realm.
"Your extermination will come at One Night in Hell.
"The Kingdom of Madness will continue."
