Post by Toast on Dec 28, 2011 18:00:41 GMT -4
(Scene opens in the Breakfast Club HQ, which is technically just a broom closet that Toast took over.. The camera pans a rather beat up room that lacks a paint job and a squirmed up feeling. The camera zooms in on a small oak desk that has a sign that reads Mr.Butter. Butter is seen sitting behind the desk.)
Butter: Welcome Breakfast Club fans to the NEW BREAKFAST CLUB HEADQUARTERS!
(Butter smiles from ear to ear.)
Butter: This is a good time for Breakfast Club fans as BREAKFAST CLUB INC. has successfully sent APW into the stratosphere with the signing of Toast and Bacon to a long-term tag team contract! This is a monumental day in the world of professional wrestling and one of the biggest things to ever hit APW or any other wrestling organization.
(Butter leans back in his black pleather (fake leather) chair as Bacon enters into the broom closet (it's a surprisingly large broom closet). Bacon takes a look around the renovated broom closet and shakes his head.)
Butter: Hi Bacon!
(Bacon turns to Butter and does a double-take at the obese, monstrous looking fat guy.)
Bacon: Who the hell are you?
Butter: I'm Buford Tutter .. but Toast insists on calling me Butter. He hired me today, I'm Toast's new bodyguard.
(Bacon now turns and stares over at Toast with a laugh.)
Bacon: Why on earth would you need a bodyguard?
Toast: Because of our lofty position in APW. We're an endangered species, Bacon, we're tag team wrestlers! We NEED to be protected, because we're part of a dying breed, amigo. If something happened to me, you wouldn't be able to live!
(Bacon smirks.)
Bacon: I think I'd survive without you.
Toast: You may, but the APW tag team division won't! That's why I hired a bodyguard, I need to make sure that I am protected 24 hours a day. Plus, I was MOBBED last night at the mall. There were at least four or five women and three dudes who recognized me and wanted my autograph and a date.
(Butter now slides his way into the conversation.)
Butter: Look at it this way Bake, I'm doing you guys a solid. I'll even protect you and Toast from the mass of unruly fans in the arenas. You'll be protected Bacon, and I'll do it for half the cost!
(Butter leans forward in his chair and smiles.)
Butter: Bakie, you have come a long way in short period of time and you accomplished many things I hear, but this week you and Toast get your first opportunity to perform in a six person tag match. You, Toast and Trixie are teaming up against Rhonda and Anti-Society X.
(Suddenly, two small, tiny midgets, which look like little replicas of Bacon and Toast step into the canyon-like broom closet. Each miniature little person has a nametag on their custom BREAKFAST CLUB t-shirts. One nametag reads: L'il Steamy O and the other reads: L'il Creamy O.)
Toast: What up?
(LSO and LCO sit on the couch facing the window.)
Butter: Get the fuck up!
(Butter hops out of chair and points at the midgets.)
Butter: You two look like you haven't had a shower or a bath in a week! Sit on the floor dirtbags!
LSO: FUCK YOU Butter!
(LCO points at LSO.)
LCO: HE WILL BLOCK YOU FROM YAHOO AND MSN!
(Toast smacks him in the back of the head.)
Toast: Shut it, boys! You two morons need some new material! We have company! This is my new tag team partner, Bacon.
(Toast shakes his head as he watches the two dwarven midgets sit on the floor. Toast sighs as he now sits down in a nearby chair and puts his feet up on the oak desk. The two half people wave excitedly at Bacon. Bacon meanwhile, merely rolls his eyes and sighs heavily. What in the hell has he gotten himself into?)
Toast: Man, what a damn week.
(Butter nods.)
Butter: Tell me about it! It's tough being awesome, I bet. You two are the leading team at wrestlingbet.com! Hell, that's all anyone can talk about is Bacon and Toast.. and Trixie of course!
Toast: Pffft... shows how they just don't pay attention. We shouldn't be just leading the bets, we should be the ONLY sure bet.
(Butter nods again but then turns serious as he looks at Bacon.)
Butter: Be honest with me, Bacon. What's going to happen this Sunday?
(Bacon stares at the floor for a moment before responding.)
Bacon: Don't worry, I've got everything under control. Trix and Toast are in great company.
(Butter arcs up an eyebrow over at Toast.)
Butter: You ready for a big night?
LSO: Biggity Big!
LCO: Cuckoo! Cuckoo!
(Without missing a beat, Toast looks at Butter.)
Toast: Excuse me for just a moment, dude.
(Toast lowers his feet to the ground and casually stands up. He walks over and leans down in front of LSO and LCO with a smile on his face.)
Toast: Hi.
LSO: Hi!
LCO: Hi!
(Toast now smiles even wider after knocking the living hell out of both LSO and LCO with his fist. He now walks back over to the chair and sits back down.. but not without shooting a glaring eye at both LSO and LCO, who are now lying in the corner, crying and holding onto one another.)
Toast: Bacon, Butter... this is OUR week! It was a surprise for me when I saw our names linked in with the sexy Trixie! I mean.. normally I'd just bag and tag her like all the rest, but she's different. First.. if I did her like the rest.. she's probably sneak up on me and castrate me while I was asleep. Plus, she's got more muscles and is far more talented in the ring than I am. Still, I like Trixie.. I'm really hoping to make an impression.
(Toast now smiles and smooths the extremely thick eyebrows over his ridged, thick, sloping Klingon-like forehead with his two fingers. Bacon shakes his head again, knowing that he's willingly signed himself up for this lunacy.)
Toast: Anyway, I'm taking things slow.. and surely she understands that I have a career to think about. But it's all good, Bacon. If you lose, then I lose. That's just how it's going to be. So don't worry... I've got a plan in mind and I damn sure don't want us to lose!
(Now it's Bacon's turn to arc up his eyebrow.)
Bacon: What plan is that?
(Toast shakes his head in response)
Toast: No can do, amigo. I'll keep that to myself since those two shortstacks back there couldn't keep a secret even if they were mimes.
(Toast jerks a thumb back to LSO & LCO.)
Toast: Don't worry... I've got your back!
(Fade to black.)
Butter: Welcome Breakfast Club fans to the NEW BREAKFAST CLUB HEADQUARTERS!
(Butter smiles from ear to ear.)
Butter: This is a good time for Breakfast Club fans as BREAKFAST CLUB INC. has successfully sent APW into the stratosphere with the signing of Toast and Bacon to a long-term tag team contract! This is a monumental day in the world of professional wrestling and one of the biggest things to ever hit APW or any other wrestling organization.
(Butter leans back in his black pleather (fake leather) chair as Bacon enters into the broom closet (it's a surprisingly large broom closet). Bacon takes a look around the renovated broom closet and shakes his head.)
Butter: Hi Bacon!
(Bacon turns to Butter and does a double-take at the obese, monstrous looking fat guy.)
Bacon: Who the hell are you?
Butter: I'm Buford Tutter .. but Toast insists on calling me Butter. He hired me today, I'm Toast's new bodyguard.
(Bacon now turns and stares over at Toast with a laugh.)
Bacon: Why on earth would you need a bodyguard?
Toast: Because of our lofty position in APW. We're an endangered species, Bacon, we're tag team wrestlers! We NEED to be protected, because we're part of a dying breed, amigo. If something happened to me, you wouldn't be able to live!
(Bacon smirks.)
Bacon: I think I'd survive without you.
Toast: You may, but the APW tag team division won't! That's why I hired a bodyguard, I need to make sure that I am protected 24 hours a day. Plus, I was MOBBED last night at the mall. There were at least four or five women and three dudes who recognized me and wanted my autograph and a date.
(Butter now slides his way into the conversation.)
Butter: Look at it this way Bake, I'm doing you guys a solid. I'll even protect you and Toast from the mass of unruly fans in the arenas. You'll be protected Bacon, and I'll do it for half the cost!
(Butter leans forward in his chair and smiles.)
Butter: Bakie, you have come a long way in short period of time and you accomplished many things I hear, but this week you and Toast get your first opportunity to perform in a six person tag match. You, Toast and Trixie are teaming up against Rhonda and Anti-Society X.
(Suddenly, two small, tiny midgets, which look like little replicas of Bacon and Toast step into the canyon-like broom closet. Each miniature little person has a nametag on their custom BREAKFAST CLUB t-shirts. One nametag reads: L'il Steamy O and the other reads: L'il Creamy O.)
Toast: What up?
(LSO and LCO sit on the couch facing the window.)
Butter: Get the fuck up!
(Butter hops out of chair and points at the midgets.)
Butter: You two look like you haven't had a shower or a bath in a week! Sit on the floor dirtbags!
LSO: FUCK YOU Butter!
(LCO points at LSO.)
LCO: HE WILL BLOCK YOU FROM YAHOO AND MSN!
(Toast smacks him in the back of the head.)
Toast: Shut it, boys! You two morons need some new material! We have company! This is my new tag team partner, Bacon.
(Toast shakes his head as he watches the two dwarven midgets sit on the floor. Toast sighs as he now sits down in a nearby chair and puts his feet up on the oak desk. The two half people wave excitedly at Bacon. Bacon meanwhile, merely rolls his eyes and sighs heavily. What in the hell has he gotten himself into?)
Toast: Man, what a damn week.
(Butter nods.)
Butter: Tell me about it! It's tough being awesome, I bet. You two are the leading team at wrestlingbet.com! Hell, that's all anyone can talk about is Bacon and Toast.. and Trixie of course!
Toast: Pffft... shows how they just don't pay attention. We shouldn't be just leading the bets, we should be the ONLY sure bet.
(Butter nods again but then turns serious as he looks at Bacon.)
Butter: Be honest with me, Bacon. What's going to happen this Sunday?
(Bacon stares at the floor for a moment before responding.)
Bacon: Don't worry, I've got everything under control. Trix and Toast are in great company.
(Butter arcs up an eyebrow over at Toast.)
Butter: You ready for a big night?
LSO: Biggity Big!
LCO: Cuckoo! Cuckoo!
(Without missing a beat, Toast looks at Butter.)
Toast: Excuse me for just a moment, dude.
(Toast lowers his feet to the ground and casually stands up. He walks over and leans down in front of LSO and LCO with a smile on his face.)
Toast: Hi.
LSO: Hi!
LCO: Hi!
POW!
(Toast now smiles even wider after knocking the living hell out of both LSO and LCO with his fist. He now walks back over to the chair and sits back down.. but not without shooting a glaring eye at both LSO and LCO, who are now lying in the corner, crying and holding onto one another.)
Toast: Bacon, Butter... this is OUR week! It was a surprise for me when I saw our names linked in with the sexy Trixie! I mean.. normally I'd just bag and tag her like all the rest, but she's different. First.. if I did her like the rest.. she's probably sneak up on me and castrate me while I was asleep. Plus, she's got more muscles and is far more talented in the ring than I am. Still, I like Trixie.. I'm really hoping to make an impression.
(Toast now smiles and smooths the extremely thick eyebrows over his ridged, thick, sloping Klingon-like forehead with his two fingers. Bacon shakes his head again, knowing that he's willingly signed himself up for this lunacy.)
Toast: Anyway, I'm taking things slow.. and surely she understands that I have a career to think about. But it's all good, Bacon. If you lose, then I lose. That's just how it's going to be. So don't worry... I've got a plan in mind and I damn sure don't want us to lose!
(Now it's Bacon's turn to arc up his eyebrow.)
Bacon: What plan is that?
(Toast shakes his head in response)
Toast: No can do, amigo. I'll keep that to myself since those two shortstacks back there couldn't keep a secret even if they were mimes.
(Toast jerks a thumb back to LSO & LCO.)
Toast: Don't worry... I've got your back!
(Fade to black.)
