Post by T-Marv on Mar 24, 2012 20:51:21 GMT -4
Here we are….and I honestly never thought we’d be here. In just over 24 hours, the greatest event of the year will be upon us. For those of us in APW, it is what we look forward to; it’s what we live for. We all hope to be a huge part of history and our year is spent building toward this one day circled on the calendar like the most special of occasions. This isn’t Christmas or a birthday…it’s bigger, IT IS RASSLEMANIA!
This year, I’m right where I want to be…in the spotlight with all eyes pointed right at me! This year, I’m entering as the Overdrive champion with everything to lose and even more to prove. And as I sit here and think about tomorrow night and what it means to me, I can’t help but shake this emptiness in my heart and my soul. It’s strange, on the eve of one of the biggest nights of my career, I’m not nervous, anxious, or “in the zone”….I feel empty.
I know, I sound like a whiney emo kid now with the whole “poor me…I have everything I ever wanted and I’m just not happy.” No, that’s not the case at all! You see, Rasslemania is more special to me than anything I can describe in my life. And when a special event like this comes around, it is only natural to surround yourself with the ones that you love, with your friends and family, with those who have supported you every step of the way. But the people that I really want here, the people I want to share this with more than anyone, are gone.
Footsteps can be heard as we walk through a long dark hallway with poor lighting that allows us only to see the dark silhouette of a man slowly approaching a large wooden door. He gets to the door and takes out a key from his pocket, opens the door, and we enter a room illuminated by candlelight and littered with pictures plastered on the wall. Finally we see “The Real Show” Terry Marvin’s face as he turns around to look at the plethora of memories that fill up this room. The corners of his lips curl into a half smile as he looks around.
You should consider yourselves lucky. You’re about to get a glimpse into a world that very few EVER do! This is my life.
Terry approaches a mantle that is decorated as almost a memorial of sorts. There sit 5 pictures in very classic looking oak picture frames of people on this mantle, each with a candle next to it, each with flowers of some sort next to them. Terry walks past the mantle with his hand out, running his fingers across the faces of the photos.
Loss is just a fact of life. It’s what happens, and it’s an unstoppable force. I have grown to accept this fact over the years. I’ve lost so many people…so many who have left us before their time is up. Fate is cruel….the world is harsh….and life is seldom fair. Here I stand…36 years old and I’ve already buried my best friend, my sister, my mother and father, and my only daughter. Some Days the Emotions are overwhelming…
THIS is one of those days.
Terry walks back to the start. He stares at a picture of a young man in his late teens with his arm around another young man and huge smiles on their faces. As the camera focuses a little better, we see that one of the men is a much younger version of Terry Marvin. Terry picks the photo up and cracks a smile.
“Who the hell could have seen this one coming eh Gavin? We spent years in High school joking around and dreaming about being huge wrestling stars. When we entered that school together this summer, neither one of us ever dreamed we’d actually make it. It was a pipe dream…just a silly pipe dream that everyone said we were crazy for even attempting. But somehow, we beat the odds didn’t we? You and I had one hell of a run together didn’t we? 5 years in RWF and 7 tag team championships, and never once did we fully turn our backs on each other. Even through our individual successes, we NEVER lost sight of what it meant to be partners! Who would have thought after all this time, I’d be the one standing here ready to take the biggest stage the wrestling world has ever seen. And you… you’re not with me, you’re not standing next to me. That wasn’t the plan..that wasn’t how it was supposed to go. We were supposed to take each other to the top, but what the hell happened? You died…and I stood there while it happened, helpless and horrified. Sure, people got hurt in this business all the time, but to die? I thought it was over, thought that was the end. But somehow I kept going, kept fighting through the pain and the fear and even though it’s been one hell of a roller coaster, I’ve made my way to the very top of the pedestal. But sometimes I wonder, sometimes I ask myself if, wherever you are, you’re looking at me with disdain and disappointment that I went on without you, that I broke our vow of doing this together.”
Terry closes his eyes at this thought, and somewhere in the nothingness that surrounds him, a voice calls out to him. He hears it as clear as day. He looks to his shoulder, swearing that he felt a hand on it. He blocks out everything else going on around him, clears his mind, and for the first time in a long time he can see Gavin…standing there, just as young as he was in the photograph, with the same “devil may care” smile imprinted on his face.
“When the hell did you become so deep and miserable. Seriously, do you honestly think that I wouldn’t be here cheering you on with every ounce of substance that still exists in me? My dream ended in that ring, but at least I got to capture a small portion of it. Do you really think I’d blame you for living out what we had planned for each other? Terry, you did it man…you accomplished out wishes and goals. You jumped on the train and took it ALL THE WAY to the finish line. Now here you are, a day away from defending a title that you fought like hell to get for the biggest wrestling promotion in existence at the best edition of their largest show of the year. Oh yeah, I’m real disappointed. Actually, you’d better get this mamby pamby emotional shit out of your system as fast as possible or you’ll let it cloud your brain, cloud your judgment and you’ll get your ass handed to you. If you go out there and fall flat on your face, then I’ll be disappointed.”
“Gee, thanks for piling on the pressure.”
“Glad I can help”
Terry smiles as he opens his eyes. Of course there is nobody standing next to him, but it’s the first time in a really long time that he actually felt Gavin was still with him. He places the picture of his friend down and moves on to a beautiful woman about in her early 40’s. Terry picks up her photo and a small tear rolls down her face.
“Hey sis! Wow, I can’t believe that it’s been almost a year already since you left. You were even there last year at Rasslemania when I couldn’t rise to the occasion. Do you remember what you said to me backstage when I was feeling the lowest of the low and was just so damn down on myself? You said ‘Don’t be a dumbass. You didn’t lose a damn thing, you went out there and poured your heart and soul into that match and there wasn’t a damn thing you could do differently. Soon, you’ll have everything you’ve ever wanted in his company, and I’ll be right there to see it.’ Well, sis, you were half right anyways. God, I miss you so much. Everything I’ve accomplished in this business I owe to you. You were there when Mom and Dad were against me going to wrestling camp….but you helped settle them down and worked your ass off to get them on board and turn them into my biggest supporters. After every win, after every loss, after every battle I would call you and you’d always have the right things to say. You supported me every single step of the way until the day you died.”
Terry wipes the tear from his eyes and smiles as he imagines what his sister would be saying right now. She’d probably be furious that he was shedding even a single tear for her. She was his older sister, so there came with that the endless teasing, pranks, and jokes that is the right of the older sibling. But even through all that, she found a way to be his #1 fan. Hell, he could even feel her fist barrel into his shoulder right now.
“You better not let your opponent see you cry. He may get the wrong impression and think you’re some softie that he can just kick around. And NOBODY kicks my little brother around…well nobody but me that is. I told you from the very beginning that Greatness exists for everybody, that it’s up to you to reach out and grab it. You’ve been reaching for a very very long time, never ceasing to go for that next higher rung. You’ve reached so much success and yet you still keep going, still keep driving toward some goal that may not ever actually exist. You’ve done me proud your entire life, and tomorrow night I know it will be no different. I’ve been there your whole life, telling you that you have to fight for what you believe in, that nothing will be given for you and you have to fight for every inch in this life. Remember when you were 5 and you had that bully who kept shoving you down and trying to take your lunch money? Remember what I said?”
“If he thinks he’s a tough guy…kick him in the nuts and find out how tough he really is.”
“Keaton Saint is the new bully, and he’s trying to take that title away from you. Don’t let him push you down….Kick him in the proverbial nuts and you’ll find out he’s not that tough.”
Terry smiles again and puts her picture back on the mantle. He takes a few more steps and stands in front of a photo of Lacy Scarlet Rose, his newly deceased daughter.
“I still haven’t processed everything that happened with you yet Lacy. It’s all too much, it’s all too hard. Every time I start to think about it, I have to wash it from my brain. It’s all like a bad dream…and a very short one at that. Everything happened so fast. I didn’t get enough time with you, didn’t get to say the things I wanted. Don’t get me wrong…I don’t regret being a total ass to you in that hospital room. Let’s face it, you deserved it….but that doesn’t mean I didn’t leave plenty unsaid as well. I just wish I could talk to you now…wish you were here, and I hope you’re at least a little proud of me.”
Terry picks up her photo and closes his eyes again, hoping to hear her voice, or see her face, or feel her hand on his shoulder. But alas, he gets absolutely nothing. He’s blocked from remembering her for some reason. Perhaps it’s just all too soon. Perhaps it’s just punishment for how he treated her at the end of her life. Perhaps it will always be that way.
Terry stands now in front of a picture of a man with gray hair and a high forehead. The smile on his face is from ear to ear as he picks up his picture.
“God, I miss you dad. Especially this time of the year when March Maddness is going on. Remember how we used to make our predictions for every game and got so damn into it. That first week you let me skip school and stay home and watch all the games with you. You’d get so pissed when a massive upset came and your bracket was screwed. You’d jump up and down and say ‘FUCK NCAA, I’m not watching any more games.’ Until the next game came on 20 minutes later. It was our tradition. Even when I left home and started my wrestling career, I don’t care where we were, I always called you the day before the games started and we made our picks. We used to watch entire games while on the phone. You’d love it this year, the Buckeyes are doing amazing. They really have a shot to win it all.”
The conversation always started the same, but erupted into some diatribe about the kids bouncing to the NBA as soon as they possibly could. He could picture it now.
”Of course they do, if they pull their heads out of their asses and start knocking down some three pointers. And Sullinger needs to keep his ass out of foul trouble. Unfortunately, next year’s gonna suck when everyone gets drafted. Stupid ass NCAA, needs to start keeping them kids in school. Once they go to the NBA, the game fucking dies and becomes all about whos shoes you’re wearing, or what parties you’re invited too. The NBA….where the Amazing death of all things basketball Happens.”
Terry laughs at this thought. But his thoughts take on a more serious note and he wonders….
“You know dad… I know this was never your plan for me. You didn’t want me to become a professional wrestler. You had loftier goals in mind. You wanted me to be a doctor, or lawyer, or hell even play pro football. I know we never saw eye to eye on my career…all the way up to the day you died. You always supported me, that’s not what I’m saying. But I knew… in the back of your mind that it wasn’t the life you wanted for me…that somewhere somehow I disappointed you.”
”Now you stop that crap right now. You had no bigger fans in the world than your mother and me. We watched your matches ever single chance we got and while we didn’t understand a god damn thing that was going on, we still rooted for you, even when you were a giant PRICK! Hell, especially when you were a giant prick! Don’t you ever think for one second that I was ever disappointed in you, or I will crawl out of my grave, grab my old belt and beat your ass till you start coughing up shit. You make me proud every single day…And if I were still around, you know damn well that I’d be in the front row, with a giant Showtime Sign and telling everyone else around there who was booing my son to suck my dick!”
“yeah, I could just imagine that. ‘Who’s that old guy cursing at the fans?’ ‘Oh, it’s just The Real Show’s Dad.’ ‘Oh, that makes sense.’
Rasslemania is tomorrow. I know you have no idea what that is, but just imagine the superbowl of wrestling, then multiply that hype by 100 and you have what I’m talking about. I a champion now too…of the biggest and best company they have going right now. But it’s all on the line tomorrow night...”
”HEY! No over grown douchbag wearing a speedo is gonna take anything away from my son. You get your ass in that ring and you show him what it’s like to be a MARVIN! Also, you sister used to say…just kick em in the balls! I don’t know whether or not it’s against the rules, but it couldn’t hurt right?”
Terry laughs as he opens his eyes. His father was a larger than life individual and loved his family more than anything else in the world. Terry knows that not only would he be at ringside tomorrow night, he’d climb the rail and roll in the ring if he thought somebody was threatening his family. Terry moves on to the last picture. A beautiful woman with shoulder length silver hair and large thick eyeglasses with big black frames stares back at him with the most beautiful smile you’ve ever seen.
“Hey mom. I know it’s been a long time….”
Terry pictures her response to this.
”I know you’re busy, but would it kill you to pick up the phone once and a while?”
“Sorry, it’s just with Rasslemania coming up and everything else, I just lost track of time. I’m heading out to Indianapolis tomorrow, got a huge match.”
”Make sure you take a jacket…it could get cold up there. Oh, and don’t forget to pack an extra change of clothes…you never know when you might need them.”
Terry laughs…even in the afterlife she’s still trying to take care of her baby.
”Also, get me an autograph from that Hulk Hogan fella….”
“Hulk Hogan’s not in the APW mom.”
”Oh, well I’m sure all you wrestlers know each other. Just call him up and have him mail one to you. So who are you wrestling.”
“I’m defending my APW Overdrive title against a guy named Keaton Saint.”
”Saint huh? He sounds like a nice young man.”
“Actually he’s a bit of a Douche!”
”Hey now! There’s no reason for name calling! Besides, you could stand to be a little nicer out there…maybe the fans would cheer for you a little bit more. I don’t understand why you always have to be such a jerk to them and to everybody else. You were always such a nice boy…what happened? Did I raise you wrong?”
Terry laughs at this as it’s not the first time those words came out of her mouth. He was very used to hearing them in fact. His mom never really got the “Entertainment” part of Sports Entertainment.
“No mom…it’s all just part of the show. You got good guys and you got bad guys. Just so happens that I’m one of the bad guys.”
”Well, maybe I can talk to them, let them know that you’re really a nice young man…”
Terry chuckles again.
“Sure mom, whatever you say.”
”Well either way…I’m sure you’ll do great. You always do. I’m always bragging about you to all my friends. They talk about their sons who are doctors and lawyers and politicians and laugh when I tell them what you do. That makes me so angry so I tell them ‘My son performs for millions of people every week and makes more money in one night than your ‘super successful’ brats do in an entire year. He’s doing what he loves and he’s entertaining the world.’ They can stick that in their self righteous pipes and smoke it. I’m so happy that you’ve found something that brings so much joy to your life. Now you go out there and kick that guys tush…”
Again Terry smirks at ‘tush’ as his mom would never EVER be caught dead saying ass.
”Love you son.”
“Love you too mom.”
Terry opens his eyes to the nothingness that surrounds him. He kisses the photo and places it back on the mantle as the tears rain down from his eyes. Suddenly he feels another hand on his shoulder and it startles him as he quickly wipes his eyes and sees Faythe standing there.
”Hey, there you are. I’ve been looking everywhere for you. Everything ok?”
He continues wiping and takes a deep breath before turning around.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just getting a last second pep talk from those that know me best.”
”Yeah? Well here’s one more. You are the greatest wrestler who has ever laced up a pair of boots. There isn’t a damn thing you can’t do when you put your mind to it and that includes turning away Keaton Saint and showing the world that you’re no fluke.”
She kisses him and smiles before patting him on the shoulder.
”Now come on, we don’t want to miss our flight.”
Terry nods as Faythe walks out the door. He turns around one last time looking at his own personal fan club and smiles.
Rasslemania is the biggest night of my life and I should be surrounded by the ones that I love, and the ones that made it all possible. And now, that I look back here, now that I’ve had my Conversations with Dead People, I realize that I am. I’m no longer empty…I’m no longer experiencing this moment alone. And when I walk into Rasslemania tomorrow night as the Overdrive champion….I’ll be surrounded by my biggest supporters, and they alone will give me all the strength I need to prove to the world exactly WHO Terry Marvin is. Tomorrow Night, me and my army descend upon Indianapolis….ITS SHOWTIME!
It only comes once a year. It brings out the best and the brightest. Legends crawl out of the wood work, pretenders show up from miles around, all looking for a piece of greatness.
For two individuals, A journey that started nearly two months ago comes to a drastic close. For the most sought after title that has ever existed in APW is on the line.
Keaton Saint couldn‘t cut it in the APW Overdrive Championship Fatal Four Way match the Overdrive right after Survive and Conquer. And ever since that moment, he‘s been a jealous prick incapable of dealing with his own meteoric failure.
There is a reason this title is strapped tightly around my waist. It‘s because I have what it takes, because I am the REAL SHOW!
Every Epic battle….every fantastic story has two sides. A good guy and a bad guy….Holy vs. Evil…Heroes vs. Villains…Love vs. Hate. It’s the classic battle of all time and it’s just as true in wrestling as it is in every single great work of fiction in existence….including the Holy Bible.
I joyously embrace my role of Villain in this epic story. I’ll be the lightning rod of hate that these people need to express their emotions against. Booing me makes them feel good about their ho-hum pathetic lives.
But that’s not gonna phase me one bit. I’ve been hated my whole career, been despised from the east coast to the west coast, over seas, and even in the drab dreams of the moronic masses. So let them rally around their hero Keaton Saint. As in any great story….Good will conquer evil right?
WRONG!!!
This ain’t no fairy tale. This is real life! And in the Real World, Keaton Saint will fall from grace and crash land back down to earth. Then the masses can have one more reason to Hate the APW OVERDRIVE CHAMPION Terry Marvin.
So here we are Keaton…Finally at that moment that we’ve both been waiting for since you first failed to achieve your dream of APW gold when I tore through you and 2 other men to claim this title which is permanently attached to my perfectly trim waist. I really have one big question to ask you? How do you feel right now? It’s Rasslemania…. The big stage. And here you are with a chance to represent all those fans that you adore so much and put the bad guy in his place. I’m sure the nerves are piling on and pressing down against you with a force of a million unfulfilled dreams. See, Keaton, If you fail….you don’t just let yourself down, you let down the masses of brainless sheep lulled into following you and hanging on to your each and every word. That must be one hell of a heavy weight on your shoulders.
Me? I don’t feel such a disturbing burden because I don’t fuck up my priorities list by placing actual victories behind feeling the love and adoration of a bunch of people who could just as easily loathe you tomorrow. The only person I let down tomorrow night is myself. See I fight for me. I win for me and my family and NOBODY ELSE. I draw my strength from the fans just like you do Keaton, from their hate. I don’t let them bog me down like a ball and chain. I don’t let them control my actions…don’t let them force me to hesitate to take the right opportunities to put the match away no matter what the cost. I am focused on one thing and one thing only….MAKING YOU QUIT!!!
So, I figured by now that a windbag like you would have had many scathing things to say about both me and my character. I’d have figured you’d have spat out all kinds of false promises and guarantees of victory to all your devoted fans. Yet I sit here less than 24 hours from Rasslemania and you are completely and absolutely silent. Perhaps that’s a tactic from you…perhaps you think silence is intimidating to me. Perhaps you plan on letting your actions speak louder than words. OR perhaps you don’t want to get the hopes up of every watching around the world knowing that you can’t possibly deliver on your promise to take back the overdrive championship because you know deep down in your heart what I know….THAT YOU CAN’T BEAT ME KEATON SAINT!
I’m sure you’re psyching yourself up….and you have yourself convinced that no matter what I do you will not say those two forbidden words that chalks this match up in the history books under the inevitable conclusion that we both know is bound to happen. But come on Keaton…let’s face the facts here. Man doesn’t know what he’s capable of until he’s pushed to the absolute limit. So when I’m breaking your bones into so many different pieces that it’s going to take a jigsaw expert to have any hope of putting them back together again…what then? When I have you bleeding and your life-force is draining away….what then? Do you think you can withstand that kind of pain? Do you think you could just let your mortality slip away? I don’t think so Saint… because contrary to the beliefs of the legions of your faithful…you are not invincible. Keaton…I make one promise to you. I will make you bleed. I will make you hurt. I will make you cry, and I will make you say “I QUIT!”
Now, before you come back with some lame ass retort about how you can do the exact same thing to me…to tell me how you’re going to make me quit and give up the one thing in my life that means more to me than even my own beating heart…reach outside your normal skill set and do something that you’re not accustomed to doing at any time in your life…..THINK!
Last year at Survive and Conquer… I was an unknown and had just lost my very first PPV match against AJ King…. BUT I DID NOT QUIT! I came back and went through 38 other people in the S&C match to finish as the runner up!
Last year after Survive and Conquer… I was battered and beaten and down on my luck. My body had failed m and things were looking bleak... BUT I DID NOT QUIT! I got back up on my feet and came face to face with RYAN RUCKUS and we caused mayham and chaos for the months leading up to and after Rasslemania.
Last Year after Rasslemania when I failed by just mere seconds to claim the OverDrive Title, once again I was beside myself and didn’t know if I had the strength to go on….BUT I DID NOT QUIT! I dusted myself off and continued my fighting and clawing and scraping to be a part of this company.
Over the last 9 months…. I’ve had some very unsettling personal and Professional setbacks that kept me out of action for some time and it looked like The Real Show had reached it’s tenure and was due to be canceled…BUT I DID NOT QUIT! I came roaring back and in my re-debut to APW I defeated a legend in this business, a man who just a few weeks ago put you in your place!
At Survive and Conquer…I drew the #2 entrant and all the odds were stacked against me. There wasn’t a single person who gave me a snowballs chance in hell of lasting even a few minutes in that match….BUT I DID NOT QUIT! I lasted over 100 minutes, eliminated more people than anyone else and gave every ounce of energy I had to get to the top ten!
After the PPV…. I was down and disgusted with myself for not performing even better than the amazing numbers I already put up….BUT I DID NOT QUIT! I walked into overdrive the next week as the underdog to win the Title and I went through 3 major names in this business to win my FIRST APW CHAMPIONSHIP!
After going through all that Keaton…do you think I’m going to just give up on my dream and hand that title over to you? HELL NO! I’m going to leave everything out in that ring…give every ounce of effort I have and I’m going to be who I’ve always clamed to be….GODS GIFT TO WRESTLING.
This years RASSLEMANIA is the Greatest event to ever hit the airwaves of entertainment…so isn’t it fitting that the GREATEST THING TO EVER HAPPEN TO WRESTLING will be defending his Overdrive championship? Tomorrow Night, GREATNESS COLIDES when I step into that ring and force you to come face to face with your very own character and dig down inside your wretched soul and figure out if you have the guts to do whatever it takes to achieve epic status. And when you search your soul and find only the empty words and broken promises that you have filled the heads of your soon to be disappointed fans, you’ll have no choice but to admit to yourself that you simply are not good enough as you look into the eyes of that Referee, everything inside your body burning with hatred and utter those two little words….I QUIT!
Tomorrow Night….Rasslemania… your legacy will be defined by those two words.
Mine however will be defined by the APW OVERDRIVE CHAMPIONSHIP as well as TWO very different words.
ITS SHOWTIME!!!
This year, I’m right where I want to be…in the spotlight with all eyes pointed right at me! This year, I’m entering as the Overdrive champion with everything to lose and even more to prove. And as I sit here and think about tomorrow night and what it means to me, I can’t help but shake this emptiness in my heart and my soul. It’s strange, on the eve of one of the biggest nights of my career, I’m not nervous, anxious, or “in the zone”….I feel empty.
I know, I sound like a whiney emo kid now with the whole “poor me…I have everything I ever wanted and I’m just not happy.” No, that’s not the case at all! You see, Rasslemania is more special to me than anything I can describe in my life. And when a special event like this comes around, it is only natural to surround yourself with the ones that you love, with your friends and family, with those who have supported you every step of the way. But the people that I really want here, the people I want to share this with more than anyone, are gone.
Footsteps can be heard as we walk through a long dark hallway with poor lighting that allows us only to see the dark silhouette of a man slowly approaching a large wooden door. He gets to the door and takes out a key from his pocket, opens the door, and we enter a room illuminated by candlelight and littered with pictures plastered on the wall. Finally we see “The Real Show” Terry Marvin’s face as he turns around to look at the plethora of memories that fill up this room. The corners of his lips curl into a half smile as he looks around.
You should consider yourselves lucky. You’re about to get a glimpse into a world that very few EVER do! This is my life.
Terry approaches a mantle that is decorated as almost a memorial of sorts. There sit 5 pictures in very classic looking oak picture frames of people on this mantle, each with a candle next to it, each with flowers of some sort next to them. Terry walks past the mantle with his hand out, running his fingers across the faces of the photos.
Loss is just a fact of life. It’s what happens, and it’s an unstoppable force. I have grown to accept this fact over the years. I’ve lost so many people…so many who have left us before their time is up. Fate is cruel….the world is harsh….and life is seldom fair. Here I stand…36 years old and I’ve already buried my best friend, my sister, my mother and father, and my only daughter. Some Days the Emotions are overwhelming…
THIS is one of those days.
Terry walks back to the start. He stares at a picture of a young man in his late teens with his arm around another young man and huge smiles on their faces. As the camera focuses a little better, we see that one of the men is a much younger version of Terry Marvin. Terry picks the photo up and cracks a smile.
“Who the hell could have seen this one coming eh Gavin? We spent years in High school joking around and dreaming about being huge wrestling stars. When we entered that school together this summer, neither one of us ever dreamed we’d actually make it. It was a pipe dream…just a silly pipe dream that everyone said we were crazy for even attempting. But somehow, we beat the odds didn’t we? You and I had one hell of a run together didn’t we? 5 years in RWF and 7 tag team championships, and never once did we fully turn our backs on each other. Even through our individual successes, we NEVER lost sight of what it meant to be partners! Who would have thought after all this time, I’d be the one standing here ready to take the biggest stage the wrestling world has ever seen. And you… you’re not with me, you’re not standing next to me. That wasn’t the plan..that wasn’t how it was supposed to go. We were supposed to take each other to the top, but what the hell happened? You died…and I stood there while it happened, helpless and horrified. Sure, people got hurt in this business all the time, but to die? I thought it was over, thought that was the end. But somehow I kept going, kept fighting through the pain and the fear and even though it’s been one hell of a roller coaster, I’ve made my way to the very top of the pedestal. But sometimes I wonder, sometimes I ask myself if, wherever you are, you’re looking at me with disdain and disappointment that I went on without you, that I broke our vow of doing this together.”
Terry closes his eyes at this thought, and somewhere in the nothingness that surrounds him, a voice calls out to him. He hears it as clear as day. He looks to his shoulder, swearing that he felt a hand on it. He blocks out everything else going on around him, clears his mind, and for the first time in a long time he can see Gavin…standing there, just as young as he was in the photograph, with the same “devil may care” smile imprinted on his face.
“When the hell did you become so deep and miserable. Seriously, do you honestly think that I wouldn’t be here cheering you on with every ounce of substance that still exists in me? My dream ended in that ring, but at least I got to capture a small portion of it. Do you really think I’d blame you for living out what we had planned for each other? Terry, you did it man…you accomplished out wishes and goals. You jumped on the train and took it ALL THE WAY to the finish line. Now here you are, a day away from defending a title that you fought like hell to get for the biggest wrestling promotion in existence at the best edition of their largest show of the year. Oh yeah, I’m real disappointed. Actually, you’d better get this mamby pamby emotional shit out of your system as fast as possible or you’ll let it cloud your brain, cloud your judgment and you’ll get your ass handed to you. If you go out there and fall flat on your face, then I’ll be disappointed.”
“Gee, thanks for piling on the pressure.”
“Glad I can help”
Terry smiles as he opens his eyes. Of course there is nobody standing next to him, but it’s the first time in a really long time that he actually felt Gavin was still with him. He places the picture of his friend down and moves on to a beautiful woman about in her early 40’s. Terry picks up her photo and a small tear rolls down her face.
“Hey sis! Wow, I can’t believe that it’s been almost a year already since you left. You were even there last year at Rasslemania when I couldn’t rise to the occasion. Do you remember what you said to me backstage when I was feeling the lowest of the low and was just so damn down on myself? You said ‘Don’t be a dumbass. You didn’t lose a damn thing, you went out there and poured your heart and soul into that match and there wasn’t a damn thing you could do differently. Soon, you’ll have everything you’ve ever wanted in his company, and I’ll be right there to see it.’ Well, sis, you were half right anyways. God, I miss you so much. Everything I’ve accomplished in this business I owe to you. You were there when Mom and Dad were against me going to wrestling camp….but you helped settle them down and worked your ass off to get them on board and turn them into my biggest supporters. After every win, after every loss, after every battle I would call you and you’d always have the right things to say. You supported me every single step of the way until the day you died.”
Terry wipes the tear from his eyes and smiles as he imagines what his sister would be saying right now. She’d probably be furious that he was shedding even a single tear for her. She was his older sister, so there came with that the endless teasing, pranks, and jokes that is the right of the older sibling. But even through all that, she found a way to be his #1 fan. Hell, he could even feel her fist barrel into his shoulder right now.
“You better not let your opponent see you cry. He may get the wrong impression and think you’re some softie that he can just kick around. And NOBODY kicks my little brother around…well nobody but me that is. I told you from the very beginning that Greatness exists for everybody, that it’s up to you to reach out and grab it. You’ve been reaching for a very very long time, never ceasing to go for that next higher rung. You’ve reached so much success and yet you still keep going, still keep driving toward some goal that may not ever actually exist. You’ve done me proud your entire life, and tomorrow night I know it will be no different. I’ve been there your whole life, telling you that you have to fight for what you believe in, that nothing will be given for you and you have to fight for every inch in this life. Remember when you were 5 and you had that bully who kept shoving you down and trying to take your lunch money? Remember what I said?”
“If he thinks he’s a tough guy…kick him in the nuts and find out how tough he really is.”
“Keaton Saint is the new bully, and he’s trying to take that title away from you. Don’t let him push you down….Kick him in the proverbial nuts and you’ll find out he’s not that tough.”
Terry smiles again and puts her picture back on the mantle. He takes a few more steps and stands in front of a photo of Lacy Scarlet Rose, his newly deceased daughter.
“I still haven’t processed everything that happened with you yet Lacy. It’s all too much, it’s all too hard. Every time I start to think about it, I have to wash it from my brain. It’s all like a bad dream…and a very short one at that. Everything happened so fast. I didn’t get enough time with you, didn’t get to say the things I wanted. Don’t get me wrong…I don’t regret being a total ass to you in that hospital room. Let’s face it, you deserved it….but that doesn’t mean I didn’t leave plenty unsaid as well. I just wish I could talk to you now…wish you were here, and I hope you’re at least a little proud of me.”
Terry picks up her photo and closes his eyes again, hoping to hear her voice, or see her face, or feel her hand on his shoulder. But alas, he gets absolutely nothing. He’s blocked from remembering her for some reason. Perhaps it’s just all too soon. Perhaps it’s just punishment for how he treated her at the end of her life. Perhaps it will always be that way.
Terry stands now in front of a picture of a man with gray hair and a high forehead. The smile on his face is from ear to ear as he picks up his picture.
“God, I miss you dad. Especially this time of the year when March Maddness is going on. Remember how we used to make our predictions for every game and got so damn into it. That first week you let me skip school and stay home and watch all the games with you. You’d get so pissed when a massive upset came and your bracket was screwed. You’d jump up and down and say ‘FUCK NCAA, I’m not watching any more games.’ Until the next game came on 20 minutes later. It was our tradition. Even when I left home and started my wrestling career, I don’t care where we were, I always called you the day before the games started and we made our picks. We used to watch entire games while on the phone. You’d love it this year, the Buckeyes are doing amazing. They really have a shot to win it all.”
The conversation always started the same, but erupted into some diatribe about the kids bouncing to the NBA as soon as they possibly could. He could picture it now.
”Of course they do, if they pull their heads out of their asses and start knocking down some three pointers. And Sullinger needs to keep his ass out of foul trouble. Unfortunately, next year’s gonna suck when everyone gets drafted. Stupid ass NCAA, needs to start keeping them kids in school. Once they go to the NBA, the game fucking dies and becomes all about whos shoes you’re wearing, or what parties you’re invited too. The NBA….where the Amazing death of all things basketball Happens.”
Terry laughs at this thought. But his thoughts take on a more serious note and he wonders….
“You know dad… I know this was never your plan for me. You didn’t want me to become a professional wrestler. You had loftier goals in mind. You wanted me to be a doctor, or lawyer, or hell even play pro football. I know we never saw eye to eye on my career…all the way up to the day you died. You always supported me, that’s not what I’m saying. But I knew… in the back of your mind that it wasn’t the life you wanted for me…that somewhere somehow I disappointed you.”
”Now you stop that crap right now. You had no bigger fans in the world than your mother and me. We watched your matches ever single chance we got and while we didn’t understand a god damn thing that was going on, we still rooted for you, even when you were a giant PRICK! Hell, especially when you were a giant prick! Don’t you ever think for one second that I was ever disappointed in you, or I will crawl out of my grave, grab my old belt and beat your ass till you start coughing up shit. You make me proud every single day…And if I were still around, you know damn well that I’d be in the front row, with a giant Showtime Sign and telling everyone else around there who was booing my son to suck my dick!”
“yeah, I could just imagine that. ‘Who’s that old guy cursing at the fans?’ ‘Oh, it’s just The Real Show’s Dad.’ ‘Oh, that makes sense.’
Rasslemania is tomorrow. I know you have no idea what that is, but just imagine the superbowl of wrestling, then multiply that hype by 100 and you have what I’m talking about. I a champion now too…of the biggest and best company they have going right now. But it’s all on the line tomorrow night...”
”HEY! No over grown douchbag wearing a speedo is gonna take anything away from my son. You get your ass in that ring and you show him what it’s like to be a MARVIN! Also, you sister used to say…just kick em in the balls! I don’t know whether or not it’s against the rules, but it couldn’t hurt right?”
Terry laughs as he opens his eyes. His father was a larger than life individual and loved his family more than anything else in the world. Terry knows that not only would he be at ringside tomorrow night, he’d climb the rail and roll in the ring if he thought somebody was threatening his family. Terry moves on to the last picture. A beautiful woman with shoulder length silver hair and large thick eyeglasses with big black frames stares back at him with the most beautiful smile you’ve ever seen.
“Hey mom. I know it’s been a long time….”
Terry pictures her response to this.
”I know you’re busy, but would it kill you to pick up the phone once and a while?”
“Sorry, it’s just with Rasslemania coming up and everything else, I just lost track of time. I’m heading out to Indianapolis tomorrow, got a huge match.”
”Make sure you take a jacket…it could get cold up there. Oh, and don’t forget to pack an extra change of clothes…you never know when you might need them.”
Terry laughs…even in the afterlife she’s still trying to take care of her baby.
”Also, get me an autograph from that Hulk Hogan fella….”
“Hulk Hogan’s not in the APW mom.”
”Oh, well I’m sure all you wrestlers know each other. Just call him up and have him mail one to you. So who are you wrestling.”
“I’m defending my APW Overdrive title against a guy named Keaton Saint.”
”Saint huh? He sounds like a nice young man.”
“Actually he’s a bit of a Douche!”
”Hey now! There’s no reason for name calling! Besides, you could stand to be a little nicer out there…maybe the fans would cheer for you a little bit more. I don’t understand why you always have to be such a jerk to them and to everybody else. You were always such a nice boy…what happened? Did I raise you wrong?”
Terry laughs at this as it’s not the first time those words came out of her mouth. He was very used to hearing them in fact. His mom never really got the “Entertainment” part of Sports Entertainment.
“No mom…it’s all just part of the show. You got good guys and you got bad guys. Just so happens that I’m one of the bad guys.”
”Well, maybe I can talk to them, let them know that you’re really a nice young man…”
Terry chuckles again.
“Sure mom, whatever you say.”
”Well either way…I’m sure you’ll do great. You always do. I’m always bragging about you to all my friends. They talk about their sons who are doctors and lawyers and politicians and laugh when I tell them what you do. That makes me so angry so I tell them ‘My son performs for millions of people every week and makes more money in one night than your ‘super successful’ brats do in an entire year. He’s doing what he loves and he’s entertaining the world.’ They can stick that in their self righteous pipes and smoke it. I’m so happy that you’ve found something that brings so much joy to your life. Now you go out there and kick that guys tush…”
Again Terry smirks at ‘tush’ as his mom would never EVER be caught dead saying ass.
”Love you son.”
“Love you too mom.”
Terry opens his eyes to the nothingness that surrounds him. He kisses the photo and places it back on the mantle as the tears rain down from his eyes. Suddenly he feels another hand on his shoulder and it startles him as he quickly wipes his eyes and sees Faythe standing there.
”Hey, there you are. I’ve been looking everywhere for you. Everything ok?”
He continues wiping and takes a deep breath before turning around.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just getting a last second pep talk from those that know me best.”
”Yeah? Well here’s one more. You are the greatest wrestler who has ever laced up a pair of boots. There isn’t a damn thing you can’t do when you put your mind to it and that includes turning away Keaton Saint and showing the world that you’re no fluke.”
She kisses him and smiles before patting him on the shoulder.
”Now come on, we don’t want to miss our flight.”
Terry nods as Faythe walks out the door. He turns around one last time looking at his own personal fan club and smiles.
Rasslemania is the biggest night of my life and I should be surrounded by the ones that I love, and the ones that made it all possible. And now, that I look back here, now that I’ve had my Conversations with Dead People, I realize that I am. I’m no longer empty…I’m no longer experiencing this moment alone. And when I walk into Rasslemania tomorrow night as the Overdrive champion….I’ll be surrounded by my biggest supporters, and they alone will give me all the strength I need to prove to the world exactly WHO Terry Marvin is. Tomorrow Night, me and my army descend upon Indianapolis….ITS SHOWTIME!
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It's been a long time, been a long time comin
It only comes once a year. It brings out the best and the brightest. Legends crawl out of the wood work, pretenders show up from miles around, all looking for a piece of greatness.
Looks like the death of me now.
For two individuals, A journey that started nearly two months ago comes to a drastic close. For the most sought after title that has ever existed in APW is on the line.
But you know, there's no turning back now
Keaton Saint couldn‘t cut it in the APW Overdrive Championship Fatal Four Way match the Overdrive right after Survive and Conquer. And ever since that moment, he‘s been a jealous prick incapable of dealing with his own meteoric failure.
This is what makes me - this is what I am
There is a reason this title is strapped tightly around my waist. It‘s because I have what it takes, because I am the REAL SHOW!
You can hate me now.. but I won't stop now..
Every Epic battle….every fantastic story has two sides. A good guy and a bad guy….Holy vs. Evil…Heroes vs. Villains…Love vs. Hate. It’s the classic battle of all time and it’s just as true in wrestling as it is in every single great work of fiction in existence….including the Holy Bible.
Cause I can't stop now.. you can hate me now..
I joyously embrace my role of Villain in this epic story. I’ll be the lightning rod of hate that these people need to express their emotions against. Booing me makes them feel good about their ho-hum pathetic lives.
But I won't stop now.. cause I can't stop now.
But that’s not gonna phase me one bit. I’ve been hated my whole career, been despised from the east coast to the west coast, over seas, and even in the drab dreams of the moronic masses. So let them rally around their hero Keaton Saint. As in any great story….Good will conquer evil right?
You can hate me now.. you can hate me NOWWWW..
WRONG!!!
This ain’t no fairy tale. This is real life! And in the Real World, Keaton Saint will fall from grace and crash land back down to earth. Then the masses can have one more reason to Hate the APW OVERDRIVE CHAMPION Terry Marvin.
So here we are Keaton…Finally at that moment that we’ve both been waiting for since you first failed to achieve your dream of APW gold when I tore through you and 2 other men to claim this title which is permanently attached to my perfectly trim waist. I really have one big question to ask you? How do you feel right now? It’s Rasslemania…. The big stage. And here you are with a chance to represent all those fans that you adore so much and put the bad guy in his place. I’m sure the nerves are piling on and pressing down against you with a force of a million unfulfilled dreams. See, Keaton, If you fail….you don’t just let yourself down, you let down the masses of brainless sheep lulled into following you and hanging on to your each and every word. That must be one hell of a heavy weight on your shoulders.
Me? I don’t feel such a disturbing burden because I don’t fuck up my priorities list by placing actual victories behind feeling the love and adoration of a bunch of people who could just as easily loathe you tomorrow. The only person I let down tomorrow night is myself. See I fight for me. I win for me and my family and NOBODY ELSE. I draw my strength from the fans just like you do Keaton, from their hate. I don’t let them bog me down like a ball and chain. I don’t let them control my actions…don’t let them force me to hesitate to take the right opportunities to put the match away no matter what the cost. I am focused on one thing and one thing only….MAKING YOU QUIT!!!
So, I figured by now that a windbag like you would have had many scathing things to say about both me and my character. I’d have figured you’d have spat out all kinds of false promises and guarantees of victory to all your devoted fans. Yet I sit here less than 24 hours from Rasslemania and you are completely and absolutely silent. Perhaps that’s a tactic from you…perhaps you think silence is intimidating to me. Perhaps you plan on letting your actions speak louder than words. OR perhaps you don’t want to get the hopes up of every watching around the world knowing that you can’t possibly deliver on your promise to take back the overdrive championship because you know deep down in your heart what I know….THAT YOU CAN’T BEAT ME KEATON SAINT!
I’m sure you’re psyching yourself up….and you have yourself convinced that no matter what I do you will not say those two forbidden words that chalks this match up in the history books under the inevitable conclusion that we both know is bound to happen. But come on Keaton…let’s face the facts here. Man doesn’t know what he’s capable of until he’s pushed to the absolute limit. So when I’m breaking your bones into so many different pieces that it’s going to take a jigsaw expert to have any hope of putting them back together again…what then? When I have you bleeding and your life-force is draining away….what then? Do you think you can withstand that kind of pain? Do you think you could just let your mortality slip away? I don’t think so Saint… because contrary to the beliefs of the legions of your faithful…you are not invincible. Keaton…I make one promise to you. I will make you bleed. I will make you hurt. I will make you cry, and I will make you say “I QUIT!”
Now, before you come back with some lame ass retort about how you can do the exact same thing to me…to tell me how you’re going to make me quit and give up the one thing in my life that means more to me than even my own beating heart…reach outside your normal skill set and do something that you’re not accustomed to doing at any time in your life…..THINK!
Last year at Survive and Conquer… I was an unknown and had just lost my very first PPV match against AJ King…. BUT I DID NOT QUIT! I came back and went through 38 other people in the S&C match to finish as the runner up!
Last year after Survive and Conquer… I was battered and beaten and down on my luck. My body had failed m and things were looking bleak... BUT I DID NOT QUIT! I got back up on my feet and came face to face with RYAN RUCKUS and we caused mayham and chaos for the months leading up to and after Rasslemania.
Last Year after Rasslemania when I failed by just mere seconds to claim the OverDrive Title, once again I was beside myself and didn’t know if I had the strength to go on….BUT I DID NOT QUIT! I dusted myself off and continued my fighting and clawing and scraping to be a part of this company.
Over the last 9 months…. I’ve had some very unsettling personal and Professional setbacks that kept me out of action for some time and it looked like The Real Show had reached it’s tenure and was due to be canceled…BUT I DID NOT QUIT! I came roaring back and in my re-debut to APW I defeated a legend in this business, a man who just a few weeks ago put you in your place!
At Survive and Conquer…I drew the #2 entrant and all the odds were stacked against me. There wasn’t a single person who gave me a snowballs chance in hell of lasting even a few minutes in that match….BUT I DID NOT QUIT! I lasted over 100 minutes, eliminated more people than anyone else and gave every ounce of energy I had to get to the top ten!
After the PPV…. I was down and disgusted with myself for not performing even better than the amazing numbers I already put up….BUT I DID NOT QUIT! I walked into overdrive the next week as the underdog to win the Title and I went through 3 major names in this business to win my FIRST APW CHAMPIONSHIP!
After going through all that Keaton…do you think I’m going to just give up on my dream and hand that title over to you? HELL NO! I’m going to leave everything out in that ring…give every ounce of effort I have and I’m going to be who I’ve always clamed to be….GODS GIFT TO WRESTLING.
This years RASSLEMANIA is the Greatest event to ever hit the airwaves of entertainment…so isn’t it fitting that the GREATEST THING TO EVER HAPPEN TO WRESTLING will be defending his Overdrive championship? Tomorrow Night, GREATNESS COLIDES when I step into that ring and force you to come face to face with your very own character and dig down inside your wretched soul and figure out if you have the guts to do whatever it takes to achieve epic status. And when you search your soul and find only the empty words and broken promises that you have filled the heads of your soon to be disappointed fans, you’ll have no choice but to admit to yourself that you simply are not good enough as you look into the eyes of that Referee, everything inside your body burning with hatred and utter those two little words….I QUIT!
Tomorrow Night….Rasslemania… your legacy will be defined by those two words.
Mine however will be defined by the APW OVERDRIVE CHAMPIONSHIP as well as TWO very different words.
ITS SHOWTIME!!!
