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Post by President Jeff on May 20, 2013 7:19:30 GMT -4
The scene opens up at the Air Canada Center in Toronto Ontario Canada. Its an empty arena and hanging from the rafters is the new APW 24/7 Championship.
There is a ladder lying in the ring waiting for the first Megastar to set it up and grab the title.
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Post by Jake Titan on May 20, 2013 7:39:39 GMT -4
Jake Titan ran down the ring as fast as his feet could carry him. Reaching under the ring, he grabs a ladder, pulled it out, slide it under the ropes, got in to set it up and grabbed the championship holding it up for everyone to see.
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Post by T-Marv on May 20, 2013 9:42:59 GMT -4
Terry comes from the crowd, slidding in the ring as Jake Celebrates his victory. He tips the Ladder Over sending Jake Tumbling to the outside. Terry reaches under the ring and grabs a steal chair. He waits for Jake to get up and swings for the fences turning Jake inside out. Terry makes the cover.
1...2...3!
Terry Grabs the belt and heads out through the crowd.
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Post by A.C. Smith on May 20, 2013 10:08:07 GMT -4
Terry Marvin is walking through the backstage area when he's immediately stopped by the Big Apple Asskicker, A.C. Smith.
A.C.: "Going somewhere, Terry?"
Terry tries to hightail it, but Smith grabs his hair and hits a hard punch to the head, knocking Terry down and sending the APW 24/7 Championship flying. Smith grabs the belt, waits for Terry to rise to his feet, and nails him in the head with it!
Smith covers, and a referee is there for the count:
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Smith grabs the championship, kissing it once and walking backstage towards catering as Terry comes to his senses.
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Post by Jason Cashe on May 20, 2013 13:20:03 GMT -4
As Smith walks into catering, he's smashed to the face with a Cherry Pie. Sweet goo splashes everywhere as he wipes at his face to try and see who did the deed. As his eyes open through the cherry chunks and jelly fill, he sees Jason Kash smiling and waving at him with a chair in hand. Kash wallops Smith over the forehead with the chair and the big man drops. Kash makes the cover as the underpaid referee makes the count.
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Kash gets up celebrating but from behind comes Mr. Dangerous who quickly rolls Kash up with a school boy and the referee hits the count yet again.
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Mr. Dangerous bounces up and down full of excitement as he grabs the 24/7 Belt and hightails it out to the parking garage wanting to leave while he's Champion.
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Post by Nathaniel Havok on May 20, 2013 16:48:54 GMT -4
As Mr. Dangerous makes his way to the parking garage, he sees Bulk Rogaine. Bulk has spent the better part of 2 hours slowly making his way out of his car, and to the trunk to retrieve his bags. As he closes the trunk, Mr. Dangerous thinks that Bulk is too old and too slow to catch him... But wait, he's wrong! With a brand new knee and hip, Rogaine is faster than he's been in 5 years! He snatches Mr. Dangerous by the hair, and Mr. Dangerous attempts a punch that is blocked. After three hard punches from the Bulkster, Rogaine delivers a big boot, and a leg drop!
Bulkster: OUCH! I THINK I BROKE MY ASS! NOT AN ASS REPLACEMENT! NO! Although, Bubbuh The Love Sponge might like it if I got a new asshole! Oh, wait, almost forgot!
Bulkster goes for the pin...
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Elated that he's the champion, Bulkster tries to get to his feet, but can't! Nathaniel Havok sees this as he walks into the arena, and can't help but laugh.
Havok: Screwed out of the Xtreme Championship last night... 24/7 Champion tonight!
Bulkster: No, wait! Let me talk to Jeff first! There's got to be a way I can politic my way out of dropping this thing!
Havok boots Bulkster in the chin, and Bulkster begins taking a leangthy cat nap. Havok then places his boot over the chest of Rogaine...
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Havok: Woo! Suck it, AC Smith! Now who's a champion!?!?
Havok quickly darts towards the entrance of the arena from the parking garage, thinking he's home free!
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Post by warrenpeace on May 20, 2013 17:14:26 GMT -4
Suddenly a hear: "baSWOOP"!
the sound of a zipline being launched that connects from wall to wall.
Havock trips over it. The title flies into the hands of the Emerald Assassin. Havock is already back to his feet when he is clocked in the head with the title.
EA opens a compartment on his utility belt and takes out a super glue foam adhesive. He sprays havocks shoulders and lays him on the mat.
EA's side kick pops in to say
"Holy heel turn Emerald Assassin!"
EA pins havock
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He takes the belt and throws a capsule at the floor that explodes into ninja smoke. EA is seen sneaking away from the smoke and coughing his lungs out.
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Post by biggs on May 20, 2013 17:46:03 GMT -4
As the Emerald Assassin continues to cough, Biggs comes from out of nowhere, nailing him with a Running Leg Lariat! As EA is dazed, Biggs pulls him up by the head, and nails the Spaced Out! He hooks both legs, 1
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3! Biggs is the new 24/7 Champion!
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Post by Jules on May 20, 2013 18:58:52 GMT -4
Biggs is looking very pleased with himself...
...Until he's laid out with a tea spoon. Out of the shadows steps...
JULIUS FARQUHAR!
Never one to look a gift horse in the mouth, he makes a regal cover.
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Post by warrenpeace on May 20, 2013 19:15:46 GMT -4
EA wakes up from his daze, as he lays on the concrete he grabs yet another crime fighting device.
The grappling hook.
He fires it at Jules, it wraps around him as EA chucks the device over a pillar and sets it to retract. The device now acts as a pulley system and raises jules several feet above the ground breaking up the pin. EA covers Biggs instead.
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EA grabs the belt, but doesn't leave instead opting to retrieve his grappling hook.
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Post by Tommy Knox on May 20, 2013 20:02:25 GMT -4
Out of nowhere, Knox rushes him from behid and spins him around. Know pokes him in the eye and then stomps on his toe sending a pain rushing up his leg. Knox then grabs Emerald and hits him with the Sativa Spike and goes for the cover.
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Knox quickly gets to his feet and grabs the title from the floor. He then turns his back and walks off...
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Post by warrenpeace on May 20, 2013 20:19:33 GMT -4
From the ground EA reaches into his utility belt and finds a pouch. He opens it and a set of marbles roll out onto the pavement and trail behind Knox. Before he see's what's coming he is suddenly slipping about from stepping on them he loses his balance and hits the pavement hard. As he collapses EA shoots his grappling hook and cracks Knox's skull hard enough to daze him. EA covers him.
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He finds the belt once more and barrel rolls out of sight.
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Post by Jason Cashe on May 20, 2013 22:40:58 GMT -4
EA creeps into the building and sneaks into the Public Bathrooms to the faint sound of grunting. He slowly begins to open each stall door and finally comes to the last one. As he pushes it open, it slaps back at him and knocks him out cold. Kash is seen sitting on the crapper and smiles as the 24/7 Champion laying out on the floor. He leaps from a sitting position and covers EA with his bare ass sticking up. Unwiped and FOUL as the referee hesitates but slaps the tile..
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Referee: I really deserve a Raise...
Kash pushes up, farts and gets back on the toilet as the ref hands him the 24/7 Belt and he slowly pulls the stall door closed to finish his business.
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Post by A.C. Smith on May 20, 2013 22:46:17 GMT -4
Jason Kash leaves the bathroom stall to wash his hands. He does, but we hear a door opening behind him.
Kash turns around, but is met by a charging A.C. Smith, who hammers away with rights and lefts before driving Kash's face into the bathroom sink. He picks him up and aims his head at the bathroom mirror, but utters one phrase before driving it into the glass.
A.C.: "I'M ALLERGIC TO CHERRIES, DAMMIT!"
CRASH!!!!!
The glass shatters, Kash crumples to the ground, and Smith covers in front of a weary referee.
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Smith grabs the 24/7 Championship and exits the washroom as Kash comes to his senses.
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Post by Michael Jennings on May 20, 2013 22:53:32 GMT -4
Michael Jennings walks by and sees AC Smith holding the title. He then grabs him into a DDT. He then goes for a cover but when he notices the title he gets off of Smith and walks away because titles are for the weak in his mind. He then walks off laughing over the whole thing.
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Post by warrenpeace on May 20, 2013 23:26:50 GMT -4
As jennings walks away, EA slides over for a pin. Before he does he grabs a chloroform covered rag in his utility belt. He presses it against AC and covers him
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Post by papapancho on May 21, 2013 0:31:54 GMT -4
Yanzel Holmes walks by watching EA pinning Ac Smith. He looks down at the chloroform rag and up at EA who is celebrating.
"To hell with this mess I'm just trying to make money for my kids. Y'all are nuts!"
He turns back around the direction he came swearing off the 24/7 title because nobody needs that much hell in their life.
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Post by Tommy Knox on May 21, 2013 6:57:00 GMT -4
Knox runs into the scene with a bucket of water and throws it in the face of EA. He then grabs a bag of powdered sugar off of a wheel barrow and throws it in the face as well. As the sugar sticks to his face, Knox grabs EA by the ears and slams his knee into EA's forehead. He then quickly follows with a jawbreaker and goes for the quick pin.
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Knox gets up in relief and grabs the title as he bends over and scratches his knee.
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Post by Jules on May 21, 2013 7:08:23 GMT -4
Knox stands up, only to be doused with a jug of iced tea!
Hardly the most offensive weapon, Knox charges Julius Farquhar, only to be clobbered with the glass jug. Jules covers...
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Julius is dragged away by...
MANSERVANT!
The mute brute picks up Julius and launches him into the camera. The screen goes dark due to this sudden technical fauilure...
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Post by warrenpeace on May 21, 2013 10:36:41 GMT -4
A brief picture of a smiling President Jeff is seen with the text :Sorry, we are having technical difficulties appears.
It flashes back to the scene. EA takes out a bottle of "Sugar be gone" from his utility belt and sprays his face. The sugar magically disappears. He then rolls the bottle under the feet of Manservant who slips and falls. Julius lands on top of him with a body splash.
EA cartwheels over pile drives Julius onto the pavement and makes the cover
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He grabs the belt and finally the sidekick Peter Eastman shows up with a convertible car. that looks like the old Lincoln batmobile painted green.
EA jumps in and they begin to drive, but Peter is terrible at driving a manual and floods it.
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Post by Tommy Knox on May 21, 2013 11:50:19 GMT -4
A brick flies through the windshield and startles EA. Knox runs in to the door and opens it, grabs EA and slams his head on the dash. He then drags him out of the car and tosses him to the ground. Knox then grabs the title and props it under his leg as he hit EA with a leg drop across the face. He the goes or the cover.
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Knox grabs the belt and holds it in EA's face, taunting him while he leaves his back vulnerable for attack.
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Post by Jake Titan on May 21, 2013 14:18:38 GMT -4
Jake Titan blind sides Tommy Knox with a crowbar across his chest. Tommy doubled over, having grabbed ahold of hurt ribs. The Original Gangasta lifted the and slammed it across Tommy's back. As Emerald Assassin recovers, Jake ran over and kicked full force on his chest. Seeing Tommy still down, Jake pulled him on his feet and hits an Death Valley Driver on the cement. He covers Tommy...
ONE...
TWO....
THREE!
Jake stands up and grabbed 24/7 Championship then proceeded to run into the women's locker room for safety.
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Post by Tommy Knox on May 21, 2013 14:48:50 GMT -4
Knox walks into the women's locker room, horny and looking for action. He sees jake smelling dirty clothes in the hamper and taps him on the shoulder. Jake turns around as Knox says...
"Fuckin' perv..."
He then grabs a pair of dirty panties and chokes jake out with them until he passes out. Knox covers...
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Knox gets up, laughs at the sight of jake lying there motionless with panties around his neck and then dumps the full hamper on him. He grabs the title and heads to the concessions.
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Post by Johnny Rebel on May 21, 2013 15:32:31 GMT -4
While at concessions, Tommy Knox runs in to Johnny Rebel, who's rummaging through any and every trash can in an effort to find a couple stale nachos. Rebel tenses up at the sight of Knox on his domain, and flings a trash can in his direction. "Simply Put" pounces with a Lou Thesz press and hooks both legs!
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Rebel grabs the championship and sprints off to his tent outside the stadium.
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Post by Tommy Knox on May 21, 2013 15:53:18 GMT -4
In a rage from bein "pwned" by Rebel, Knox chases him to his tent. While he's inside, Knox kicks the posts over causing it to collapse on him. Without knowing what's underneath with Reb, Knox dives on top and then rips it open only to get smashed in the face with a portable tv. Stumbling back, Knox regains his focus and grabs a nearby pack of hotdogs and lunges forward, smearing them across Rebs face. Knox then grabs the title and lays him out with it and covers while picking one of the loose dogs on the ground up and eatin it cold.
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Finishing his dog, Knox grabs the title and walks to the nearest beer stand to enjoy a nice cold beverage.
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Post by Jake Titan on May 21, 2013 17:53:26 GMT -4
As Tommy get's completely smashed off his ass, spilling beer over two ridiculously fat women. Looking revenge, Jake is still covered in women's panties and happened upon Tommy Knox. The gangsta chuckles seeing that Tommy likes big beautiful women just as much as Jake does. As teh women try softening up to Tommy, Jake ran over and tackled Tommy like Mean Joe Greene. The two flew over the counter top, and Tommy got up first.
"You fuaaaahhhhh!"
Tommy thew up on Jake, but it was the distraction he needed. Jake backed up enough, ran over and did a Lui Kang flying kick straight out of Mortal Kombat. His scream was just as high pitched as the video game character. Tommy happily passed out with beer running over him. Looking around, Jake whistled for referee. He planted one foot on his opponents chest.
ONE!...
TWO!...
THREE!..
Jake jumped up with teh belt and celebrates on the fragile glass popcorn display case.
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Post by Tommy Knox on May 21, 2013 18:30:02 GMT -4
Knox gets up and shakes his head as the stars still circle. He sees jake celebrating and gets up, stumbling toward jake and pulls his feet out from under him. As jake crashes through the glass, popcorn flies everywhere. The two fat chicks come over and Elgin eating it as Knox pours hot butter on his hang lows. As one big'un goes for the butter, Knox jumps on her back and rides her all the way down as she collapses on jake. The ref sees the two on top and comes in for the count as Knox pretends to ride a bull.
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Knox hops off and grabs the title as the other large woman comes in to help her friend. Knox tips her over and leaves as the two smother jake. Knox then heads to his van to put a fatty in the air, no pun intended.
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Post by Michael Jennings on May 21, 2013 20:40:21 GMT -4
Trevor Jennings, who has escaped from jail, knocks down Knox using his blow up doll aka his woman. Knox goes down and Trevor covers him.
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Trevor grabs the belt, his blow up doll, and quickly looks around for his psychotic son Michael before running off.
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Post by warrenpeace on May 21, 2013 23:18:18 GMT -4
Suddenly EA swings from out of nowhere. HE lets go of the super hero rope and leaps onto Jennings shoulders and swings him down with a huricanrana. He pulls the legs down and pins him quickly.
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HE presses a button on the top of his boots and small jet trajectories as well as a set of wheels appear on his boots and he skates away at super speeds.
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Post by Jake Titan on May 22, 2013 2:33:26 GMT -4
Hearing where Emerald Assassin is going, Jake hopes onto one of the fat ladies who uses her Rascal to chase after Assassin. A sputter sound gives away he's out of fuel, maybe he should have checked. Jake Titan screams like a woman as he dives at EM, spearing him through a "conveniently" stacked wall of boxes. The both stand up and snap into Marital Arts poses, complete with bad lip syncing.
"I will father's death, Emerald Assassin."
"You father was a foolish man, he couldn't see death looking him in the face."
"You will pay for your insolence! HONOR!"
The two began striking more made up, whacky, Martial Arts poses for thirty seconds. They strike so many the become winded. "DO something!" The Assassin yelled.
Jake delivers a Chuck Norris Roundhouse kick and knocks the champ down. He goes for a cover.
ONE!...
TWO!...
THREE!...
Jake gets up and puts the title over his shoulder, in more bad lip syncing. "You were doomed the day you killed my father. I have avenged him."
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